Chapter 14
Fourteen
ALEX
I look at Marissa, and for the first time, I see her for who she truly is. She’s no longer the reckless eighteen-year-old kid who flew all the way to Germany and put herself in harm’s way just to find her best friend who was missing. She’s no longer the ruthless nineteen-year-old kid who ripped my heart out by leaving me.
No, she’s grown into an amazingly strong woman and an incredible mother. She could have terminated the pregnancy or given Grace up for adoption, but no, she chose to keep her. She’s done an amazing job raising Grace and playing the role of both parents with very little support. At this realization, any anger I have left for her vanishes and is replaced with admiration. I can’t think of anyone I would rather have as the mother to my little girl. I can’t think of anyone I could ever be more in love with. There it is, the reality I’ve been trying to escape. I am and always have been in love with Marissa Summers.
“Shit!” she yells, and tosses her phone onto the bench in the corner, breaking me out of my thoughts.
“You okay?”
“No, I was trying to update my mom, and Amanda, but my phone died.” She pulls at the roots of her hair.
“Here, use mine.” I hold my phone out to her. She looks down at it, then backs up and me, and just stares. “What?” I ask.
“Seriously, Alex, do you think people still memorize phone numbers?” she spits, glaring at me.
“Hey, I just wanted to let you know the MRI we had before her is taking a little longer than expected, so we haven’t started yet. I didn’t want you to be worried because it was taking longer.” the doctor says, poking his head in the door.
“Thank you,” we both say with a sigh of relief.
“I’ll see if Annie or Freedom can go by the house and grab our chargers and a change of clothes, just in case.” I pick her phone up from the bench. “I have a car charger that will work with your phone. It’s going to be a while, so I’ll see if I can get it charged enough for you to update your family at least.”
I feel like my heart is being ripped in two. I hate leaving her in the room by herself, but I know she has family she needs to update. I get in the car and plug her phone in. I am thankful to finally have a moment to myself. I let my mind wander to all of the worst-case scenarios. A few weeks ago, I didn’t even know I had a kid, and now I can’t imagine life without her. There are so many moments I want to have with her, moments she needs to pull through for.
I want to watch her graduate high school and go off to MIT, following in my footsteps. I want to walk her down the aisle. Be there when she has kids of her own. Who am I kidding? She’s never going to be allowed to date. She has to pull through this. I need to have those moments with her. I want to have those moments with both of them. I have found my missing pieces, and I won’t survive without either of them.
Taking my phone out of my pocket, I send a text.
A: Hey, I’m sure Annie told you, but we are at the hospital with Grace. Any chance I can get you to run by the house and grab our chargers and a change of clothes for Isa?
Freedom
No problem. Any word yet?
They think she had a stroke but are still doing tests.
Nope, I refuse to believe it. It’s going to be something minor, and she’ll be ok.
All right, I’m on my way to your place. See you in about an hour.
Her phone is at six percent. That should be enough to send a couple of texts at least. I grab the phone and make my way inside. I notice Grace still isn’t back
“Any news?” I pass Marissa her phone.
“No, not yet. Hopefully, they will be done with the MRI soon. The waiting is killing me.”
After a few minutes of silence, the door opens, and they roll Gracie’s bed back into the room, and to our surprise, she’s awake. “Mom, I’m scared,” she says, her words slurred as if she’s had too much to drink.
“It’s okay, baby. Momma’s here. You’re going to be okay.”
“We were able to do the spinal tap while we were waiting for the MRI. Now, we are just waiting on the lab work, and the doctor to review the imaging,” the nurse says before leaving.
I pull my chair closer to Grace and reach over to grab her hand. “Your mother’s right, you’ll be okay.”
“I can’t feel my hand. It’s like it’s not even there.”
After another hour or so, the doctor comes in and examines her by having her squeeze his fingers, kick her feet, and move her eyes around. Her right side is clearly weaker, but she does everything she’s asked.
“My head hurts,” she says, clutching her left temple.
“We will get you something for the pain.” He turns his attention to us. “She’s tested negative for meningitis, and the MRI did not show signs of a stroke or any other brain injuries.” I breathe a sigh of relief.
“Then what is causing this? Clearly, something has to be wrong,” Marissa demands.
“We haven’t quite figured that out yet. We have one of the best neurologists in the world. She will be here tomorrow. I recommend getting some rest. Do you both plan on staying tonight?”
“Yes, we’d both like to stay.” I look over at Marissa, and she nods.
“I will have one of the aides bring in a rollaway bed. It’s rather small, so I’m not sure you will both fit. That bench you’re sitting on pulls out into a half bed. It’s not exactly comfortable, but it’ll do the job.” She gives us a smile, and then she’s gone again.
After about an hour, there’s a knock on the door. Freedom walks in with food, coffee, chargers, and clothes. “I come bearing gifts!”
“You are a lifesaver.” Marissa jumps up to hug her.
“What did the tests show?”
“We still have no idea what happened, but it wasn’t a stroke at least,” she mumbles into Free’s shoulder.
“At least that’s something.” She turns to Grace. “Hey, kiddo, I’m sorry you’re not feeling good.” Grace nods and then falls back asleep.
Freedom stays and keeps us company for a little while before she has to leave. An aid brings in the bed and extra blankets and pillows for me. I insist on taking the bench and Marissa having the rollaway. She doesn’t fight me on it, which isn’t like her.
Marissa gets in bed and turns her back to me. Unable to sleep I lay here scrolling through my phone when I hear her crying from across the room. So, I do the only thing that feels right and hope she doesn’t push me away. I walk across the room, slide into bed behind her, and hold her to my chest. “Shh, I’m here. I got you. Close your eyes and go to sleep.”