Chapter Two #4
“Thanks.” She gave the target a soft smile and then a little frown. “I wish my husband thought so.”
There were times when she wouldn’t mention another man’s claim on her, but she rather thought this one would view it as a challenge. A man’s ego and libido were the smart spy’s keys to the kingdom.
“Your husband’s an idiot.” He glanced around. “Where is he?”
“Reel him in, sister,” Lou encouraged.
She shrugged and let the hint of tears pierce her eyes.
It was easy. When she needed to cry she thought about her dog and that someday she would lose Bud Two the way she’d lost Bud One and…
Nope. Only a hint of tears. She didn’t do dripping wet sobs.
That would defeat the point. Men wanted her to cry pretty, not see her soul.
Even Ben. “I think he’s talking to someone on the gala team. A woman. He didn’t even dance with me.”
A brow rose, and she saw the calculation in his eyes. “Well, why don’t I step in for him and then maybe I’ll whisk you away? Wouldn’t that teach him a lesson?”
Yeah, that was a way to get herself raped, but he didn’t have to know that she could kill him fifteen different ways. Instead, she smiled tremulously and took his hand.
From there it was simple. She was charmingly graceless and bumped against him, looking at him with breathless anticipation so he was watching her lips while her hands slipped inside his pocket and she transferred the thumb drive to the hidden pocket in her evening gown.
She would have to tell her cousin Devi how well it worked in the field.
Lou was their gadget guru, but Devi designed and made clothes, and there was nothing wrong with that.
“Why don’t we…” the target began.
“And here comes the drama,” Lou advised.
Ben was right there as though he’d been watching and waiting for the chance to extract her. Or he simply wanted to get it all over with. “Maggie, what the hell are you doing? I told you to wait for me. I didn’t tell you to plaster yourself all over another man.”
There were suddenly eyes on them, and the target stepped back, disappearing into the crowd. Coward. She hoped he got his ass kicked for losing those files.
Ben’s hand was on her elbow as he led her off the floor. “You okay?”
“Perfect,” she whispered back. “My team is one block over. I’ll meet you at your hotel.”
He huffed as they walked past the line waiting to get in. “Not on your life. You don’t leave my sight until I have a copy. Do you think I forgot how you walked off with the Mongolian intel?”
Again, that was her sister, but she couldn’t point that out. “Fine, but we should move.”
They made it outside and started walking toward the small building a block away where they were set up. The townhouse was a CIA safe house complete with all the gadgets Lou could ever want to play with.
And a lonely twin bed for Kenzie to sleep in. She didn’t even have Bud Two to cuddle while she was here.
“You’re safe. I’ve got her in lockdown since you’re bringing the boy back after your date,” Lou promised. “She’s locked up good and tight if you want to bring him upstairs.”
She wasn’t about to do that because while her sister might hide, her father wouldn’t. He would be right there with judgmental eyes and sharper than a stiletto sarcasm. “Meet me in the lobby and I’ll pass it off.”
“Or I could come up to your room,” Ben replied, his eyes on the cobblestone street in front of them.
It was a warm night, and the tourists were out in droves. There was soft lights and music coming from the cafés and clubs around them, but they simply moved as quickly and quietly as they could.
“I don’t think my handler wants you up there.”
“I don’t think I care what your handler wants,” he shot back, his face in a deep frown. “Maggie, we should talk. This is bullshit.”
She took him around to the garden entrance. It looked all perfect and normal unless one caught the signs that there were like twelve cameras on them. It didn’t matter. She needed to get through the next couple of minutes and he would go away and she would be alone again with her righteous anger.
The evening hadn’t gone the way she’d hoped.
What had she hoped for?
The gate closed behind him, and she saw the shadow of Lou moving from one of the upper floors toward them.
“Tell me what I’m missing, Maggie.”
He was half hidden in shadows, the willow tree behind him and the moon above.
Damn, but she should have taken him to the front porch. It was bland. It didn’t look like a place where the hero and heroine of her latest romantasy obsession would talk about their dragons or the vampire nation rising. “It doesn’t matter.”
She turned, and he caught her elbow. “It does to me. Maggie, tell me one true thing.”
Her heart constricted. “I’ve told you lots of true things, Ben.”
“And have you lied?”
“Of course I have. We’re spies, and we don’t work for the same agency.
We’ve both lied and we’ll continue to lie.
” Which is why it would never work no matter how much her heart wanted him.
They might be able to have a brief affair, maybe hook up when they were working together…
Except that half the time he was working with Kala, and wouldn’t her twin lose her shit if Ben reached out and grabbed a boob because he thought she would respond to him?
Kala would respond with a bullet.
Why the hell couldn’t she fall for one of the guys at The Hideout?
Lou appeared and seemed to feel the gravity between them. She gave Ben a nod and a half smile and took the thumb drive. “I’ll be back with a copy.”
She turned and walked in the house.
How many people were watching them now?
She moved behind the willow, pulling him to a spot where she knew the cameras wouldn’t catch them. “What do you think you’re missing?”
“I want to know what you mean when you talk about your submissive part.” His jaw was tight as he said the words. The moonlight caressed him, the shadows painting his gorgeous face in stark lines. “All I’ve seen is the part that wants to tell a man what to do.”
Kala. Though that wasn’t what she was trying to do.
Kala needed control. Kenzie required something else.
“It doesn’t matter whether you believe me or not, but I’ve never topped a man.
There’s a part of me that longs to submit, to find a lover I trust so much I’ll kneel at his feet and let him treat me like a sweet fuck toy. ”
She heard him groan.
“I dream about having hours and hours where I don’t have to be in control, where I don’t have to worry about anything but making my Master happy.
” She could hear the stupid longing in her own words.
“Where I can be naked and never once worry he’ll use it against me because I’m his and he would never allow anyone to hurt me.
Not even him. That’s what I wish I could get, but I’m starting to think it’s nothing more than a pipedream. ”
“I don’t know.” The words came out gravelly, as though he had to force himself to speak. “You said Dare and Tash are happy.”
“They aren’t us,” she replied with a bittersweet sigh. It felt good to be here with him in the moonlight, but they had such little time and he was… She wouldn’t call him the enemy, but he couldn’t feel the same way about her and do what he’d done to Lou.
Her father was right.
“You think we don’t get a happy ending?” Ben asked.
“Not with each other.”
His hand found her wrist, and he drew her in.
“I don’t know that I accept that. Fuck all, Maggie.
Half the time I want to murder you and the other half all I want to do is lay you out and feast on you.
I want to get into bed with you, and I don’t think I’ll ever get out. Tell me you don’t love Cooper McKay.”
Every word went straight to the wistful girl part of her that longed for him. “I don’t love Cooper. Not the way you mean.”
He was so close. He towered over her, and she was wearing heels. “I don’t want to never know, Maggie. I can’t never know.”
Her breath caught as she realized he was leaning over. He was going to kiss her. He was going to plant his lips on hers, and then she would know, too. She would know if there was any way this could work. Even for a little while. Even if they had to keep it secret.
Just one secret that could be hers and hers alone.
She could feel the warmth of his breath and…
“Here’s your copy. Tell Joseph I said hello.”
Her father. She stepped back, the moment broken.
Ben stepped away, though the frown on his face let her know he wasn’t happy about the interruption. He took the new drive. “I hope it’s all here.”
Her father’s brows drew together. “I’ll give you that one because of what’s happened in the past, but I would also suggest if you don’t trust my team, perhaps you should find another to work with. You’ve done it before.”
“Yes, and we know how that worked out,” Ben said enigmatically. He glanced over at her. “Why don’t you go change and I’ll take you out for a late supper? I think we should talk more.”
It was everything she wanted. And nothing she could have.
She couldn’t simply date the man. She’d figured out a long time ago that she could have stolen moments with him or she could be all in, and there was nothing in between.
That was wrong. There was this thing they had now.
Purgatory. This was her sexual purgatory.
Always close but never once getting properly dicked down.
Hell, half the time her twin was actively trying to separate this man from his penis.
So maybe she should throw herself into being his booty call.
Wouldn’t that be better than this awful place they found themselves in? At least they would know.
Before she could open her mouth to turn him down her father was speaking again.
“The team is moving to London tonight,” her dad said. “We pull out of here in thirty. Good luck, Parker.”
Ben turned and walked away without another word.
Kenzie took a long breath and forced herself to go numb.
It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered except the mission. She’d signed up for this, and she wasn’t going to cry about it now.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I know it hurts, but as long as you’re in the field with your sister, it’s not smart to spend even a night with him.”
She forced a brittle smile on her face. “Of course. I was making sure he didn’t cause a scene. I’ve found flirting keeps him from going over the top.”
Her dad sighed. “Sure you were. I was serious about leaving, though. We need to be in London by morning.”
Kenzie strode into the townhouse, ready to deal with her twin, who would likely have an enormous amount of opinions on how she’d handled things.
Kala was in the kitchen, a tub of ice cream and a bottle of vodka in front of her.
“Hey, I already packed. I left some sweats out for you to change in to, but I thought you could use some comfort food. And vodka. Are we in a Ben sucks mood tonight or the world sucks because I can’t be with that douchebag Canadian? I’m prepared for either.”
“Kala,” Lou admonished.
But it was just the way her sister was. She’d basically told Kenz she loved her. “I’m in an I need a hug mood.”
Her twin—who was not touchy feely in any way—opened her arms. “I’m sorry it was shitty. I know it’s partially my fault. Come here.”
She hugged her sister and hoped this stupid feeling would go away.