Chapter Three
Ben stood outside the swanky restaurant. Top. He wondered what it meant. His brain had gone straight to the sexual meaning, but then it always did when he was thinking about Ms. Magenta.
He’d kissed her.
He’d finally kissed her and it…
Maybe it was because they had loads of pent-up sexual frustration between them, and it couldn’t possibly be as good as he built it up in his head.
It had felt…wrong.
He’d been a dick. She’d come all the way to Toronto to give him a debrief on the possible attempted assassination of Dr. Rebecca Walsh.
Her car had blown up outside her home in Sweden, and everyone knew she had connections to Manny since it had been Manny’s father’s kidnapping of the good doctor that had led to his death.
While Manny pretended to admire the famous neurosurgeon, Ben knew the truth. Manny hated her.
So that intel was important, and he’d known she would be the one coming after she’d kissed him in the hospital months before.
He didn’t count that as their first kiss since she’d done it because he’d saved her.
He could still see her body on that fucking table.
He’d come to apologize to her and he’d known exactly where to go.
While he might not know where she laid her head at night, he knew where she spent her time.
The Hideout. He’d been to the place before, and Maggie’s team treated it like their clubhouse.
They played in the club and did not mind having classified meetings in the conference room.
The first time he’d come she’d been sitting waiting for him in an electric blue corset that made his eyes damn near bulge out of his head. And he’d wondered if she’d been playing with Cooper McKay.
So when he went looking for her this time, he’d gone straight for the club.
He’d found her there and after kissing her she’d asked him to meet her here.
Should he leave? Did he have the answer he needed in that one kiss?
“Ben?”
He turned and she was there. She’d changed from athleisure wear to a cocktail dress that clung to her every curve. Her magenta hair curled around her shoulders like sweet candy he wanted to sink his hands into.
But that kiss…
That fucking kiss. “Was it weird for you the way it was for me?”
Her head tilted slightly. “What are you talking about? The fact that you saved my life and Cooper made a big scene? I was unconscious, you know. I couldn’t control how he reacted.”
She was referring to the time he couldn’t forget. “We should probably talk about that, but it wasn’t what I meant. I was talking about the kiss. I kissed you an hour ago and I’m worried it was forgettable enough that you’ve already put it out of your mind.”
Her lips curled up in a secretive smile. “So it wasn’t a good kiss for you?”
“It was awkward. It wasn’t… I suppose I’ve built it up in my head.”
She moved into his space, and his dick responded immediately.
“It was rushed, Ben. And it was awkward because I knew Cooper was there and could see us.” She put a hand up.
“I don’t love Cooper. I didn’t run after him.
I got ready to come and see you, but I couldn’t have this discussion at the club. I can’t ask him to leave.”
Cooper had been there at the end. Cursing him and telling Ben that he wished him luck with her.
She was right. It had been rushed and awkward, and it bothered him that it was their first kiss because he was done playing. He wanted her. He was going to have her, and he didn’t care about the potential fallout.
He’d seen her die. He’d held her body that day in Toronto when Manny kidnapped Maggie and a woman named Carys and her fiancé, Tristan Dean-Miles, and Captain Zach Reed.
When the bullets went flying, Manny set off a fail-safe—a bomb meant to take the house down around them.
And Ben knew he couldn’t leave Maggie behind.
“Maggie, I want to forget all the reasons why this can’t work.”
She went on her toes and brought her lips close to his, hovering. “Then maybe you’re ready. Kiss me, Ben. See how it feels this time. See how it feels when it’s the right time and the right place and the absolute right woman for you.”
This was what he’d expected. This heady, almost drugged feeling he got when he was close to her, when their bodies brushed together and he could feel her warmth. When he could smell the citrus of her shampoo and her pink hair caressed his cheek.
He followed his instincts, which had gone haywire when they’d kissed earlier, but they were right back online now.
He felt electric when his mouth touched hers.
He moved this time instead of standing there.
He took control because it felt right to do it.
She wanted a dominant lover, and damn, but she brought it out in him.
One kiss and he was ready to strip her bare and place his mark on her.
His tongue slipped inside her mouth and stroked over hers, and it took everything he had not to come in his freaking slacks.
He stepped back because they were standing right on the street, and no matter how much he wished it wasn’t true, they were still targets for his psycho ex-friend. “Let’s go inside.”
She pulled on his hand when he started leading her in. “Ben, was it different? Was it good?”
Was it good? It was beyond, and he had to deal with it because he was through pretending she wasn’t the be-all, end-all of his existence. “It was perfect.” He leaned over and kissed her again. “It was everything I wanted it to be. Needed it to be, and we need to talk.”
There was the sweetest flush to her face. “Yes, we should talk.”
He led her into the restaurant, hope in his heart for the first time in a long time.
An hour later, Ben wasn’t sure how they’d stayed apart. He felt magnetized around her.
“I don’t remember what happened,” she said, and there was the slightest flush to her cheeks. Like she was embarrassed. Or telling a bit of an untruth. “I woke up in the hospital. I’m still not entirely sure what that man put my body through.”
She was talking about what Manny had done to her mere weeks before.
He could still remember seeing her on that fucking medical bed, an IV in her arm and attached to various wires that would give Manny data about her pain.
“It was an experimental drug. I think a bit of it survived.” He wasn’t doing this to her.
“Maggie, I know some of it survived the fire. That room he held you in wasn’t completely destroyed. ”
She seemed to take that news in stride. “So CSIS has it.”
“I’ll do what I can to get you information about it,” he promised.
Her head shook. “Don’t get in trouble. I’ll let my handler know. He’s still got some ties in your world. Ben, if this is going to work, we have to understand that there’s a wall when it comes to our jobs.”
“You don’t want to work with me?” He didn’t like the idea of a wall between them.
He wanted nothing between them. Despite the fact that he knew she was being practical, he didn’t want to acknowledge that their agencies, while somewhat friendly, had issues with each other.
Relations with the States had frayed years before and were still touchy.
Her hand came out and moved over his. “Of course, I do, and I will whenever possible. But we have to deal with the fact that it might be hard for us to be together. What are you thinking? I’ll be honest, I started off with the deep belief that we would have a couple of filthy, glorious one-night stands and then I would be able to move on. I don’t think I can move on from you.”
He got such a sense of peace when she touched him and spoke sweet words. He felt her caring. Or she was an excellent actress and she was still playing him and he was the dumbest asshole in the history of time because hadn’t he been through this before?
Her hand moved on his forearm, the motion soothing, like he was a predator and she was going to stroke him down from his emotional turn.
“You’re thinking about him,” she said quietly.
“He nearly killed you.” He had some things to admit to her. “I tried to get your medical records.”
“Tristan would have gone in and erased them.” She sat back with a glass of Pinot Noir in her hands.
She looked comfortable in the space, like she’d been here many times, and she probably had since the staff had put them in a private dining room.
It was one more mystery to solve when it came to the most mysterious woman he’d ever met.
“I’m fine. It was terrible and I have some new scars, but I’m okay.
I’m cleared for field work and everything. ”
“Baby, you need to understand that he knows how I feel about you. I have no idea how.” He was getting paranoid about it, looking for cameras or people hanging around to listen in. It felt like Manny was everywhere.
“He’s very likely excellent at reading your signs and signals.” Maggie offered another possibility. “He finds me interesting, and he likes to take apart the things that interest him. Literally.”
She needed to understand. Manny wouldn’t stop. It was one of the reasons this was a bad idea in the beginning, but she was on his radar now. It was better that they were together. Better that he could protect her.
Except he wouldn’t be with her most of the time.
He was going to have to tell his shitty tale. He was almost certain she knew a little of it. “When we were in Australia and Manny came to Dare’s hotel suite, he told Tasha and your handler about a woman named Deanna.”
She nodded, and there was suddenly a sheen of tears in her eyes.
Sometimes she was so emotional. Others almost completely shut down.
It was probably about work. There was the professional Maggie and the real one.
This one. If she sometimes seemed like she was two different people it was because she had to be.
“Yes, Tasha gave us all a report. She was your fiancée, and she had an affair with Huisman.”