16. Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Sixteen
Callie could tell that Danny wanted to say something. He lingered after their session, taking way too long to put his guitar away. Then he stood in the doorway, shifting from foot to foot.
“Spill it,” she demanded.
“What?”
“If you have something you want to say, then say it. I don’t bite. You know that.”
He was quiet for a minute, and she wondered if she had been too blunt. At least he didn’t panic and run away.
“Callie, can you show me how to write a song?”
Callie caught her breath. She hadn’t expected him to ask outright. She thought she would have to coax him into it.
“I can try,” she replied.
“How did you learn?”
She smiled. “My Dad taught me. Did you know that my Dad is your music teacher at the grade school?”
Danny nodded.
“I can’t exactly remember how I got started, but I’ll ask him. You know, he writes music, too. ”
“What kind?”
“Mostly country music songs,” she answered, “kind of like mine, but…happier, I guess.”
“I don’t want to write happy songs,” he said, completely serious.
She choked back a laugh.
“No, I figured you might have some sad stuff to write about first.”
“Yeah.” He seemed pretty matter-of-fact about it. “I want to write a song for Grace.”
Who was Grace? Callie set the question aside. She could ask Adam later.
“I’ll talk to my Dad today and get his advice. We can get you started tomorrow. Does that sound good?”
He nodded again.
“Okay, then. You need to head home or you’ll miss the school bus, but I’ll see you tomorrow. Bring a notebook.”
“Thanks, Callie.” He said it softly, but she heard him.
“Anytime, kid.”
When he had gone running in the direction of the cottage, his guitar case swinging wildly in one hand, Callie leaned back and sighed. This was news, and she needed to share it with Adam. She had planned to give them both a few days of breathing space before seeing him again, but a promise was a promise.
An hour later, she found Adam in the barn, working on the boat. This time it seemed to be in more pieces, and he was using a very loud tool of some kind. He hadn’t heard the cowbell clang, nor had he heard her call his name. He worked, shirtless, a sheen of sweat highlighting the muscles of his back under the work lights. There was even a tool belt slung low around his hips. She leaned in the doorway, content to watch and wait. She drifted into a daydream, fantasizing about all the tantalizing ways that this meeting could play out .
Sudden silence jerked her out of her reverie. She straightened up, shook off all those inappropriate thoughts, and called out to him.
“Adam.”
He spun around. She had startled him.
“Callie, what are you doing here?”
Callie looked at his eyes, not his bare chest, and definitely not at the dusting of hair leading down into the front of his jeans. She ignored the play of muscles as he lifted the heavy tool and set it on a nearby workbench.
“Nothing,” she stammered. Definitely not staring at your half-naked body. “Everything’s fine. I just wanted to give you an update.”
He gave her a skeptical look and grabbed his t-shirt off the workbench, pulling it on over his head.
“Great. Go ahead.” His curt tone of voice told her more than she wanted to know. Sure, she had been expecting a little awkwardness after their last encounter, but this was ridiculous. Apparently he thought she had come over here on some flimsy pretext in order to seduce him. Maybe that was plausible given their past history, but he was the one wearing a tool belt and parading around without his shirt on.
“You remember when we talked about incorporating songwriting into my sessions with Danny?” she began.
He nodded, arms crossed as he leaned back against the work table.
“I was planning to introduce it gradually, but he asked me point blank today if I could help him to write a song. I thought you would want to know.”
Ha. Now he would feel like an idiot, because she had a totally legitimate reason to be here. Clearly she had no intention of seducing him. That was wishful thinking on his part. She was here with an actual update on Danny, a report of even more progress .
“Thanks,” he said, uncrossing his arms and resting his hands on the edge of the workbench. “You’re right. This is exactly the kind of thing I’d like to know.”
She smiled, pleased that he had admitted it out loud. But then she remembered the other critical question.
“I did want to ask you about one thing. Who is Grace?”
She tried to ask gently, in case the name brought back memories, but apparently not gently enough. He stiffened, the arms crossed again, and he wiped all expression off his face.
“What did he say about Grace?”
“He said that he wants to write a song for Grace.”
Adam opened his mouth, but no words came out. He walked over to a small refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of water, drinking half of it before he faced her again.
“Grace was Danny’s little sister. She was three when she died in the accident.”
“Oh my God.” They were both silent for a moment. “I thought Grace might be a friend, or maybe his grandmother. Not his sister. It hurts just thinking about it.”
She felt like she might throw up, so she leaned against the doorframe and closed her eyes. She must have gone white, or done something else alarming, because Adam walked over to her and clasped her upper arms, propping her up.
“Are you sure you can handle this?”
Callie’s eyes snapped open and she straightened up under the warm weight of his hands. Her body might welcome the extra support, but she resented the implication that she wasn’t strong enough.
“Of course I can handle it. If Danny can stand to work through this, then I can certainly handle listening.”
“This is rough stuff,” he persisted, “and I need to know that you’re not going to freak out and run away halfway through. If you start this, I need to know you can finish it. ”
“I’m not going anywhere.” She met his eyes squarely and didn’t flinch.
“For now,” he qualified.
“For now,” she agreed, hating that she needed to hedge her answer, but it was true, and he was right. He studied her for a moment more, then dropped his hands, breaking the intense connection between them.
“I have a request to make, on Danny’s behalf,” she said.
“What?”
She struggled to find the right words to explain. Everything that came to mind sounded stupid, or insulting.
“Writing a song is a risky undertaking—for anyone, not just for Danny. When you finally share that song with someone, you make yourself vulnerable in a way that’s hard to describe to someone who’s never done it before.”
“Okay. So what do you need?”
“When Danny’s ready to share the song with you, I need you to listen without judgment.”
“I’m not going to criticize his song, Callie. I’m not an idiot. Or an asshole.”
She flushed, but didn’t back down. He was taking this as an insult, but it wasn’t about him.
“That’s not what I mean. This is his first attempt. It’s likely to be a little clumsy, a little cliché.”
“So?”
“So a typical reaction to that would be to smile a little, or maybe pat him on the head when he’s finished. But he’s not an idiot either. He’ll be hypersensitive, and that little smile, that pat on the head, will feel condescending.” She took a deep breath and started over. “Listen, if you find that you’re distracted by Danny’s inexperience, I need you to use your best poker face. Don’t smile. Don’t pat him on the head. Be completely serious. Can you do that?”
Adam smiled, which ticked her off .
“This is a big deal. I can’t believe you’re not taking this seriously.”
He laughed, then laughed harder as she became more and more outraged.
“Calm down,” he said through his laughter.
“This is exactly what I’m talking about,” she bit out the clipped syllables through clenched teeth. “If you smile, or laugh, or do something else stupid and inappropriate after hearing Danny’s song he may never speak to you again.”
Adam finally managed to stop laughing.
“Give me some credit here. If Danny chooses to share a song with me, I’ll be as terrified as he is, and as vulnerable. I’m not going to ruin it.”
She opened her mouth to argue, but he raised his hand to stop her. It was his turn to be serious.
“What you need to understand is that this is about far more than a song. This is about Danny and me and our ability to stay together as a family. I’m fighting for us to stay together, and I need to know if Danny is with me in this battle.”
He was waiting for some kind of response, but she had no idea what to say.
“Has he said anything to you about what he wants? About the future?”
She shook her head, and he sighed. He must have been hoping for more, but she and Danny rarely talked about Adam, or about this custody issue. They concentrated on the music.
“So we move forward from here. You help him write a song for Grace. I’ll fight to keep him with me. Maybe, when he’s done working through the past, he’ll be ready to talk about his future.”
“I’ll do what I can. I’m sorry I can’t do more.” She reached up to squeeze his forearm, wanting to offer some comfort.
He reached for her as well and threaded his fingers through her hair, much as he had done the other day. She tipped her head back into his hand, hoping that maybe, just maybe, he had changed his mind.
“You’re doing more than you know,” he said, giving her a gentle kiss on the forehead. Then he pulled away, returning to his work on the boat, leaving Callie standing alone in the doorway.
Adam turned back to the boat, determined to steer clear of temptation, but simply being in the same room with Callie undermined all his good intentions. He needed to stay focused on the long-term goal, which was to create a healthy, stable family for Danny. An opposite family. Callie could never be a part of that. She had chosen a very different path. At best, they could have a fleeting affair before she returned to her real life. A part of him wanted that, no matter what the risk to the custody battle or to his own sanity, but he refused to put himself first. Right here, right now, his world revolved around Danny, and Danny needed to come first.
“Thanks for meeting with me today,” began Kat. She studied Danny, who sat across the desk from her with his arms crossed, looking down at his feet. She sighed. Given a choice, she would have preferred to meet with him in the waiting area and send Adam to the car, like last time, but Adam had steamrolled them into her office and here they sat, Principal and Delinquent, while Adam waited outside the door. She couldn’t think of a way to break the ice.
There was no reason to stay behind the desk. It was only making the tension worse. Kat stood and walked around the desk to sit in the other guest chair next to Danny. He finally looked up, thank God, and she took her opening .
“Look, Danny, I know you don’t talk to everyone, but the time is coming for you to speak up. You know that your grandparents want you to live with them?”
He nodded.
“And your uncle wants you to stay with him?”
He nodded again.
“What do you want?”
He shrugged, broke off eye contact and looked back down at his feet.
“Still no opinion, and that’s fine. Here’s what you need to know: I’m going to make a recommendation to the judge. Right now, there are strong arguments to be made for both sides, but if you speak your mind, your opinion will matter a lot.”
He looked back up at her. Excellent. She had piqued his curiosity.
“You heard me. Your opinion can make the difference, but only if you speak up. If you choose to say nothing, the judge and I will make the decision for you.”
Kat held his eyes for a moment to make sure he understood, then she rose and walked toward the door to the outer room. Before she opened it, she looked back at Danny one last time.
“You still have my card?”
He nodded.
“When you decide what you want, call me. Anytime. Day or night. Wake me up in the middle of the night if you want. But call, okay?”
He smiled at the idea of waking her up. If he thought prank phone calls were funny, then there was definitely hope. She smiled back and opened the door. Adam jumped up from his chair and joined her in the doorway.
“We’re all set here. Danny has some things to think about, and he knows what to do when he reaches a decision. Right, Danny?”
Kat held his eyes until he confirmed with a nod .
“Great. I’ll let you know as soon as I hear about a date for the hearing. In the meantime,” Kat directed her words at Danny, “keep talking.”
He gave her a brief smile before ducking in between her and Adam and heading out to the car. Kat couldn’t help but be insulted that he seemed so relieved to escape her company, but at least he had kept her card. Small steps were all she needed, so long as they were headed in the right direction.
She put her hand on Adam’s arm to stop him before he followed Danny out the door. A part of her longed to ask him out to a nice, adults-only dinner, but things between them were still tense. Besides, he was still off-limits. Dinner, for the moment, was not an option.
“I’ll call you later this week,” she said, “to see how things are going with the music lessons.”
“That’s fine,” he said curtly, and then he left.
Kat sighed. Still no faith in her judgment? She could feel herself getting caught up in Adam’s opinion of her and mentally shook it off. She would never go down that road again. She was not that na?ve, needy girl anymore, desperate for approval from the men in her life. She had changed. Never again would she be that vulnerable.
That afternoon, Callie knocked softly on the door of her Dad’s office. The door was ajar, so she poked her head inside. She needed his advice before her session with Danny tomorrow morning. Sure enough, he was there, but he was listening to the other side of a conversation on the phone. He waved her in, motioning for her to sit in one of the chairs.
She was glad she hadn’t barged right in, the way she had always done as a child. The old presumptions about this house being her house, in which she had unfettered access to every room and could interrupt any conversation, had fallen away. After her intrusion into her mother’s memory box yesterday, she was feeling the need to be on her best behavior.
“Stay cool, man, and let me know what you think about the new material,” said Luke, then joked around a bit before saying goodbye. When he talked to his music-industry buddies, he always sounded like a cool cat from the seventies, which made Callie giggle.
It was easy to forget, in the routine of day-to-day living, that her father was more than a music teacher. He kept his songwriting private, even from Callie. The family never saw that side of him, except for rare glimpses like this into his other world.
“What can I do for you, sugar?” he asked, leaning back in his chair. “The music doctor is in.”
She smiled, loving the ‘cool cat’ talk, and plopped down in the recliner in the corner.
“Dad, I need help. You know I’m working with Danny every morning?”
He nodded. “How’s that going?”
“Better than I ever expected. He wants to learn to write music, and for the life of me, I can’t remember how I learned. Any advice?”
He leaned back, sighed, and reached for his guitar, which sat right next to his office-type chair on a stand. He settled the instrument in his lap and fingered the strings, absently plucking out a melody while he thought about it.
“Well, first you need to know the basics.”
Callie laughed. “I know that, Dad. I was hoping you could break it down. You know, step one, step two….”
“When you and I first started writing songs together, you had a pretty solid background in music theory. You may not have thought about it very much, but you had been taking piano lessons for a few years, and playing guitar since you were strong enough to press down on those strings. You knew your major and minor chords, and how to add a seventh, and generally knew how a transition was supposed to sound. How much music does this boy know? If he already speaks the language, it will be a lot easier to help him learn to write it.”
Callie considered what she knew of Danny’s training.
“He knows a lot of material—more than I would have expected, but it’s mostly in G. He knows a few chord families, knows how to improvise a little, but that’s about it. I don’t think he’s tried any other instruments, and I don’t think he reads music at all.”
“So you keep it simple. If he wants to write something, he’ll need to stick with what he knows. He’ll end up writing something that sounds like a folk song, and that’s okay. Over time, his vocabulary will expand, and he’ll be able to develop more complex stuff. But for now, you start him off easy.”
“He’s going to focus on the lyrics, I think. He’s got a lot to say, and he doesn’t have another way to say it.” Her father smiled, and there was a lot more loneliness in that smile than Callie had ever noticed before. “That’s why music gets written, sugar.”
“I’ll see if he can get words down on paper, so we have some raw material.”
“Start with the chorus. Whatever is circling around and around in his head and he can’t get it out—that needs to be the chorus. Everything else is just verse. Oh, and save the kicker for the bridge.”
Callie refrained from rolling her eyes at that bit of advice. She must have been five years old the first time he had told her to save the kicker for the bridge. In fact, she could still remember that first song she had ever written. Sure, it was a simple little thing, but it had come from the heart and it sure had helped her feel better.
“Thanks, Dad. I have some ideas about how to get started. ”
Callie rose and started toward the door, wanting to give her father more work time, but his words caught her before she could get away.
“Have you thought any more about cutting a demo?”
“I thought we agreed it was too risky.” She leaned against the doorframe, needing the extra support. The sudden thought of leaving the band made her feel lightheaded.
“No. You said it was too risky. I said you should keep thinking about it.” He paused, his lips curving into a smile. “What I meant was that you should keep thinking about it until you came around to my way of thinking, which is that you should do it. And I know just the place.”
“Around here?”
“Yep.” Luke looked very pleased with himself. “My buddy over at the local radio station was bragging to me the other day about their new, state-of-the-art recording studio.”
“You’re joking. State of the art?”
“Well, he may have been exaggerating, but it is fairly new. Certainly adequate to record a demo.”
Callie stood in the doorway, her mind spinning with all the possibilities and implications. Between the lightheaded feeling and all the spinning, she thought she might be sick.
“Think about it. We’re an awfully long way from Nashville, and nobody would need to know. If you want to give it a try, I can make it happen.”
Adam’s words echoed in her mind: ‘This is a small town. Somehow, one way or another, everyone would know.’ But would it matter, this far from Nashville?
She pushed herself upright. This was not a decision she needed to make today. It could wait, until she figured out exactly how much risk she could handle.