Emiliano
FUCK UP
“I wanna know who the fuck it is,” Ignacio yells, slamming his fist on top of his desk. Everyone is filed in, and other than any sound he makes, the room is quiet.
Even Carlos sits at attention.
We thought we had enough protection. We thought we covered all of the bases.
Until last night.
I got a call at three in the morning and had to tiptoe out of our bedroom to answer it. Only to be faced with my brother swearing in my ear about a missing shipment. A shipment that’d been sent straight from El Jefe , which means we now have to inform him of what’s been going on here.
Something that will likely require a flight to México to visit him face-to-face. Mami will want to go as well, and the notion of having the both of them traveling during such a delicate time has me unnerved. Too many things could go wrong.
“Get the fuck out of my face, all of you,” he spits out, turning in his chair so he’s no longer facing us.
Carlos glances in my direction, and I want to ask him what we should do, but Nas isn’t finished .
“Carlos,” he barks. “Pack your shit. You’re going to see El Jefe .”
The silence that rings after his statement is near palpable, and Carlos’s wide eyes aren’t helping. Ignacio turns in his chair, seeing that we’re both still here.
“I told you to leave, Emil,” he states, his words gruff. “We don’t know what could happen, and the less time we spend in the same place, the safer our bloodline will be.”
I shudder at his words, hating the notion that any one of us could be gone before our next breath.
“Bad enough Mami wants to host a party for the anniversary of Papi’s death,” Nas mutters, and I notice Carlos shifting in his seat.
“I can go.” I offer myself instead. They can afford to lose me. Thoughts of Taina being alone plague me, but I can hear my father in my ear.
Loyalty is the Pineros way.
It’s time to put my loyalty to the test.
But Ignacio shakes his head, which makes me glance at our brother before looking back at him.
“He is next in line. You’re already playing your role, papito . Keep focusing on that,” he instructs, shifting his gaze to Carlos. “It’s time to grow up, hermano . Can you handle it?”
With both of our stares trained on him, his Adam’s apple bobs before he nods in response, causing Nas to follow suit. Except he’s smiling.
I’m not convinced, but if I trust anyone, it’s Ignacio. I can’t even bring myself to fully question whether sentiment has him making poor decisions. I just hope this isn’t going to bite us in the ass.
“We’ll take care of Nina while you’re away. She can stay here at the house with Mami and I’ll stay at Emil’s.” Ignacio says it like it’s final. And typically it would be, but not when it comes to Carlos.
He shakes his head before our brother has even finished speaking. “Nah, I’ve got her covered on security, and you know she bickers with Mami . The last thing I need are phone calls with them screaming at each other in Spanish. She can stay at our place, and I’ll have Fabián with her.”
Ignacio sits back in his seat, bringing his hands together in front of him, his previous outburst a distant memory.
“You think he can handle it alone?” he asks, his brows raised.
“You’ve never seen him with a gun because you keep him behind the steering wheel.” His tone seems accusatory, and before I can remind him that he needs to speak with respect, he continues. “ Pérate , are you offering the ranch to Nas when you didn’t want me to stay there?”
By the end of his question, his glare is fully aimed at me. As if I owe him anything, let alone my house.
“No, I’m staying there to oversee renovations,” I grit out, hating to have to answer for anything. Especially when I’ve done nothing wrong. “He was saying he’d stay at my place in the city.”
Carlos stands—the only way he’ll ever tower over me—his fists balled like he’s going to do something he likely won’t. He’s stupid, but he isn’t that stupid. The man is good with several weapons. But if we’re bare knuckle brawling, he doesn’t stand a chance.
His eyes glitter with his disdain, because he knows it’s true.
“And why couldn’t I?” The man who does the bare minimum for this family—if that—expects everything handed to him.
“Because you’re a fuckup, Carlos! And I’m sick of bailing you out,” I exclaim.
Finally. I’ve had enough of his bullshit after the last time he fucked up over a year and a half ago, accidentally paralyzing someone after a hit and run.
He’d gotten six months in prison, and we paid the family handsomely to keep the backlash minimal.
Nothing is worse for a life of crime than having eyes on you .
Unfortunately for him, outside of his bills and necessities, we no longer financially support him. I overheard Papi tell him that if wanted to get paid, he’d have to actually have a job.
He was no longer allowed at our meetings, essentially exiled from all family business.
I always thought his loneliness was the reason why he married Nina so quickly, who we never truly got to know. But now with Ignacio in charge, he’s not only allowed to join us, he’s expected to.
And still, he acts like he wants to be anywhere but here.
I’ve tried to be kind and understanding, and I do miss what we had as kids. But it’s becoming clearer and clearer that we’re never going back to that. He’s become someone I don’t recognize.
“You’re lucky Nas is even giving you a chance to reenter the fold,” I mutter, standing so I’ve now got the upper hand. “Because if it were me?—”
“Well, it isn’t, so sit the fuck down. The both of you,” Ignacio interjects, not bothering to raise his voice.
We glare at one another, but we do as we’re told. I look away first, no longer giving a shit what he has to say or what he’s going to do.
“Listen to me, Carlito,” my oldest brother starts, using our father’s old nickname for him. It’s eerie, how similar they are, down to the sound of their voices. “You’ve been a fuckup, Emiliano is correct there. But this is your chance to earn your rank.”
He wastes words that could inspire a man worth his weight.
I don’t bother looking in Carlos’s direction. But I don’t question Nas’s decision again. I’m frustrated that I even let myself go there.
“Oh, I’m gonna prove myself,” Carlos grumbles, jerking his head in my direction. “And this cabrón will be the first in line to apologize. ”
Yeah fucking right. I’ll grow wings and fly first.
I’ve had it with his entitled bullshit.
“Good. You’re leaving tomorrow. Emil,” he snaps in my direction before pointing his finger at me, and in my peripheral, I can see Carlos standing to leave. The door clicks shut behind him, and Ignacio continues. “What’s up with you, papito ?”
“What? Because I’ve run out of patience?” I lean forward, my elbows on my knees, my hands between them. “I can’t watch him disrespect everything our family built. You know he told me Mami didn’t love Papi ?”
Nas raises his brows before shaking his head. “His reality is way different than ours. But if I give him the chance to change—if I send him to Tío Guillermo, maybe he can learn some lessons Papi didn’t have the time or patience to teach him.”
There’s a quiet desperation in Ignacio’s tone that makes me pause. It’s like he doesn’t quite know what to do with Carlos either. So either he’s going to show up or he’s out.
I can’t fault my father for giving up once we had to pay that family half a million dollars—money that he worked to bring in. I remember the photos from the scene, how mangled his car was, and he somehow walked away with only a broken rib.
“I’m getting on a call with the Morelli’s tomorrow,” Nas informs me, and I know this shit is about to turn into a bloodbath.
I’ll need to get in contact with our paid “friends” on the force.
We’re gonna lose some of our men over this, and we’ll have to pay their families for their lives—or their freedom.
“We’re going to war, and we’re going to need more firepower. ”
There’s a vibrating sound, and at first I think it’s my phone, but Nas grabs his, a frown marring his features when he looks at it.
“Hello,” he answers, and I get up to leave so he can take his call in private. “I’m leaving soon. Do you need anything?”
There’s a softness to his tone that he reserves for Mami , and I smile at how he and I have come together to care for her since our father died.
“Tell her I said I’ll call her later,” I tell him as I open his office door.
My brother pulls the phone away to say, “It’s not Mami ,” before pressing it against his ear once more. When I stand there with my brows drawn, he waves his hand, dismissing me.
I leave just in time to hear him say, “Yes, I’ll be there in forty-five minutes. Let me know what you both want for dinner.”
By the time I get home, I’m ready to see Taina’s smile. It’s the latest I’ve dragged my ass home since she moved in, and once I walk inside, I see the subtle changes she’s made so far.
She hasn’t left in the few days since our argument, and we’ve had sex every day since, sometimes multiple times a day. She’s expressed wanting to explore things she never got the chance to, and the fact that she trusts me with her body is an honor.
The house is still, but there are paint swatches on a few of the walls and a new television in the living room. She hasn’t replaced the couch yet, but we discussed some options.
I climb the steps, happy as hell that I won’t be going into the office tomorrow. I used to work Saturdays for a while, but now that I’m no longer relying on my career to hide my emotions behind, I’m eager to spend time with Taina .
As I approach our bedroom, I hear the low hum of the television.
When I walk inside, I see her fast asleep on our bed, her body curled into itself.
Her curls are splayed over the satin pillowcase she sleeps on, and my eyes follow the accentuated curve of her waist and hip as she lies on her side.
Mountains and valleys that I want to run my tongue over.
Maybe in the morning when she wakes up , I think to myself as I grab clean clothes for a shower.