Chapter 22 #2
Even though I know it's over, whenever I leave the house alone, I still have brief moments of panic.
When that happens, I have to stop and take a moment to reset.
Miles is gone, but I know there are still monsters out there.
And they don't always lurk in the dark—sometimes, they hide in plain sight.
And they aren't all mine.
When I get to the hospital, Elias is asleep with the television on. After setting down the bag of clothes I brought for him, I climb into the bed beside him. I try not to wake him, but it doesn't work.
"You smell like Nolan," he mumbles, his voice raspy from sleep.
"Yeah, I know."
Elias wraps an arm around me. "Is it just you?"
"Uh-huh. Just me."
"Good. Then I can tell you what I was dreaming about."
"Do I want to know?"
"I was dreaming about you—bent over my bed, with my handprint on your ass cheek, your pussy wet and swollen." He takes my hand, moving it over the rock hard bulge in his shorts. "I'm surprised I didn't come in my pants again."
"Well, you know they lost both of their last games before winter break without you. I guess that means both sides should have been red and swollen."
He raises his eyebrows. "Oh, I know, Saige. Trust me."
"One of those games, they lost zero to five. It was so embarrassing, I almost asked Simon if he wanted to come take it out on me."
"Saige, you're in trouble now." Elias shakes his head. "It's like you want me to punish you."
I slide my hand inside his waistband, wrapping it around his thick cock and working it from base to tip. "Yeah…maybe I do."
"Fuck yes," he moans. "I need to come so fucking bad, baby. Go faster."
My eyes dart toward the door as I pump his dick faster.
"Don't worry about the door, baby. If anyone comes in, I'll just tell them to come back when you're finished—that you're such a good sister, and you need to make me come. They'll understand." His dick jumps in my fist, precum leaking from the tip. "Fuck…put it in your mouth, Saige."
I glance toward the door again, and he grabs me roughly by the chin. "Hey…what did I say?"
My pussy clenches. "Don't worry about the door and make you come."
"So, why are you looking at the door?"
"I'm sorry."
Elias moans. "That's all right, baby. When I get home, you'll make it up to me, won't you?"
I nod. "Yes."
He releases my chin, and I move between his legs, taking him into my mouth.
"I've had a lot of time to think in here," he says, fisting my hair at the scalp while I bob my head on his cock.
"There are so many things I want to fucking do to you, Saige.
I want to see your pussy and your swollen red ass dripping with my cum. Hey, look at me."
I look up at him, making eye contact while I lick and suck him.
"Nod if you understand."
I nod around him, and he thrusts into my mouth, salty cum pooling on my tongue and in the back of my throat. My clit pulses while I swallow around him, holding his gaze, squeezing my thighs together to take the edge off.
When he releases me, I let his dick fall from my lips and move back onto the bed with him.
He closes the space between us—he has a full beard now, and it tickles when it grazes my top lip.
Then, he kisses me, sliding his tongue into my mouth, likely tasting his own cum, but if it bothers him, he doesn't show it.
He gently touches my cheek with the back of his hand. "That wasn't your punishment," he says. "You understand that, right?"
"Yes."
"I've been keeping a mental list of all the times you've mouthed off to me since I've been stuck in here, baby. It's a lot."
I shrug. "Good."
"That counts, too, Saige. And I have good news for you."
"Yeah? What's that?"
"Your day of reckoning is coming sooner than we thought."
My eyes widen. "You get to come home? When?"
"Tomorrow."
My jaw drops. I sit up, grabbing a pillow and hitting him with it. "What the hell, Elias? Why didn't you tell me?"
"I just found out last night—Jesus."
"Then you should have texted me."
"I wanted to tell you in person, fucking brat." He pulls me back down onto the bed, swinging a leg around my waist.
"I should leave."
"You know I won't let you." He smiles, pushing a stray hair away from my face. "The pink is back, I see."
"Yeah. I like it. I'm trying to feel like myself again; it helps."
"I like it, too." He stares at me for a minute, toying with my hair before adding, "I need to ask you something, Saige."
"What is it?"
"What's it like for you on campus now?"
"I told you already—it's better. We've gone out a few times, and people still stare, but they're quick to look away. After what happened, I think they're ashamed. And they should be. Oh, and I ran into Josiah—he told me to tell you he never doubted you, and he always believed in West Pine Batman."
Elias scoffs. "Bullshit."
"I think I got a pity A on my psych final, too."
"Good. You earned that fucking pity A. Fuck them. But what about you—are you happy?"
"Yeah…I think I am. I'll be happier when you get home."
"Do you remember how nice it was in Toronto?"
I nod. "Yeah."
"Well…the coach called me. They still want me on the team."
It feels like a punch to the fucking stomach. "What? What do you mean? You're not going to go, are you?"
"I have to, Saige," he says. "This is my only shot. I've wasted the rest of them, just like I wasted all that time with you."
I pull away. "So, you're leaving me."
"No. I still want you to come with me, just like we talked about—a fresh fucking start."
"No," I tell him. "I've tried the fresh start thing too many times; I don't want a fresh start."
"Saige…" He takes my hands in his. "I know what you're worried about, but we wouldn't be leaving them."
"Yeah, that's exactly what we'd be doing, Elias." I shake my head. "I can't."
"I love you so much..."
"Then don't go!"
"That's not fair, Saige. You know it's not."
I blink back tears. "I know. But what you're asking isn't fair, either."
"I want to be with you every day."
"You're the one leaving!" I snap. "I can't fucking believe this."
"But I'm not leaving you." I stifle a sob, and he reaches out to me, touching my cheek. "I love you, Saige. You know how much I love you. Come with me; let me take care of you."
"No. Not without Dax and Nolan, and you know Nolan can't go. He has to help take care of his sister."
"It'll only be part of the year. You'll see them all the time."
"I see them all the time now. Elias, you don't really want to leave them, do you?"
"Saige…"
"Nolan says we're a family."
"We are. We'll still be a family."
I sigh, shaking my head. "When are you leaving?"
When he rakes his fingers through his hair, I know I won't like the answer. "New Year's Day."
"Elias…that's two days from now."
"I know; I'm sorry. I wish I had more time, but I don't."
"But—"
The door opens, and a doctor enters the room. "Sorry to interrupt. Elias, how are you doing today?"
"Totally fine," he says. "My leg doesn't hurt, and I look like a badass. I'm ready to go home."
"Humble, isn't he?" she asks.
I swallow the lump in my throat and slide off the bed. "I'm going to go."
"Saige…no."
"It's okay," I tell him. "I'm really happy for you, Elias. You deserve this. I'm sorry for freaking out. I'll, um, see you tomorrow, I guess. Right?"
"Yeah…yeah, of course. I'll see you tomorrow, Saige."
I grab my bag from the chair and head for the door. "I love you," he says as I leave. "I'll text you."
I don't answer, holding my breath until I get out of the building. And when I get into the car, I lock the doors, and then scream.
"Fuck! Fucking…fuck this!" I punch the dashboard. "Fuck you, Elias."
Old habits rise to the surface. I think that I fucking hate Elias—that he knew he was going to do this to me all along because that's what he does.
All he's ever done is hurt me, and this is no different.
Love isn't real, and people never say what they mean.
They only care about what they can get from you.
And after everything Elias did—after the black dress, the text messages, and two years of fucking torment—he made me fucking love him, just so he could do this.
But I know that's not true, and it isn't fair, either. He wouldn't be lying in that hospital bed with scars covering half of his leg if it were.
I rest my head against the steering wheel, catching my breath. Despite what Dax said, I can't tell him to stay. He'd only resent me, just like he did before.
I can't be the reason he loses his last chance to really make it at hockey. Even if it hurts. Even if it tears us apart.
And I can't blame him for wanting to leave West Pine. I mean, fuck…just weeks ago, the entire campus turned on him and thought he was a murderer. So did I. So did Dax and Nolan.
I sit in the parking lot for over an hour, debating going back inside. When my stepdad parks just a few spaces down from me, I finally start the car and drive home.