Chapter 9
CHAPTER NINE
MIA
Tella’s pony blows a breath through his nose, his long neck stretching as he drops his head, tucking his muzzle closer to his chest. Tella rises up and down in the saddle, her heels pressing lower than her stirrups as her pony trots past.
“Good job, Estella!” her riding instructor, Magnolia, calls out from where she’s standing in the center of the arena. “Do you see the way he tucked his head from just a small amount of pressure on the reins?”
She bobs her head, her black velvet helmet moving as she tucks her bent elbows closer to her ribs. Reaching into the back pocket of my jeans, I pull out my phone. I lift it into the air and swipe open my camera, pressing record.
“All right, Estella, sit in your seat and urge him into a canter.”
I watch Tella as she stops posting, tucking her tailbone to sit deeper in her seat.
“Squeeze your legs against his sides and roll your right wrist while lifting your reins. We want him to pick up the correct lead.”
Tella follows Magnolia’s instruction, the movements of her body fluid, as if she does this everyday.
She’s a talented rider for being a little under six years old, but it’s obvious that it’s just natural for her.
A smile tugs at my lips as I remember my days like this as a child.
Hours upon hours spent at the stables and on the back of a horse.
I wonder if Caleb would mind if I took Tella to see Hank.
He carried me through my showing days in middle and high school, but after he started to have issues with his knees, I decided it was time to retire him, so he could grow old in the pastures.
He’s twenty now and his health is better than it was, but he’s content and happy in one of the meadows by the lake.
He’s still technically my horse, but Willow convinced her brother to let me keep him at the farm instead of boarding him at the stable I had him at. Noah takes care of him for me now and I visit when I get the chance.
Tella’s pony picks up the correct lead, his inside front leg leading with each stride. Tella holds perfect form, her body rocking with him as they circle around the arena. I keep my phone in front of me, recording and taking pictures of her as she canters past.
“Good, Estella, keep him moving!”
My phone vibrates and Caleb’s name flashes at the top of the screen with a message.
Caleb
How are things?
I slowly turn around, flipping the camera to my front one and take a selfie, smiling at the screen with Tella in the background. I send it to Caleb, turning back around to watch her as she slows Sodapop to a trot then back down to a walk.
Just finishing up her lesson.
Good. How is she doing?
She’s a natural. How long has she been riding?
I look up, watching Tella ride to the center of the arena to meet with her instructor.
She started taking lessons when she was three.
She looks like she belongs on a horse.
She’s happy there, that’s for sure.
I was the same way as a kid.
Did you ride?
Tella slides down the left side of her pony, her toes touching the ground before she stands on flat feet next to the gelding.
He cranes his neck, turning to her as he nuzzles his nose against her hair.
Tella giggles, reaching over to pet his forehead and down his nose. A smile drifts across my mouth.
I did until college. My horse is an old man now, so he’s retired.
Maybe you can take T to see him. I’m sure she’d love that.
Heading onto the ice, talk later.
I stare down at my phone, not surprised by his abrupt exit of the conversation, but feeling unsure as to whether or not I’m supposed to respond. Locking my screen, I slide my phone back into my pocket and head over to the gate to meet Tella as she leads Sodapop back toward the stable.
“Did you have fun?” I ask her as I fall into step next to her and her pony. Magnolia closes the gate behind us and follows behind as we pad through the dusty stone path that leads to the back of the barn.
“Yep!” Tella looks over at me with a grin. “Cantering is my favorite.”
“It’s mine too.” I give her a wink. “You looked great out there.”
Tella tilts her head to the side. “Do you have a horse?”
“I do,” I say, nodding eagerly. “His name is Hank, but he’s retired so I don’t ride him anymore. I was telling your daddy about him and he said you might want to go see him sometime.”
“Oh, yes! Please. I would love that!”
I chuckle, pausing to slide open the barn door for Tella and Sodapop to slip inside. “Maybe we can go some afternoon after school. He loves apples, so we can stop and get some to take to him.”
“Sodapop loves apples too.” She walks past the tack room, leading him into the wash stall. He spins on his hindquarters as she turns him around and stops in the center of the cross-ties. “Maybe we can get him some too.”
“We sure can,” I tell her, smiling brightly. “Do you want some help untacking him?”
Tella nods eagerly. “Yep! I can’t do his girth by myself yet.”
I walk over to Tella, handing her Sodapop’s halter and lead rope as she takes off his bridle.
He bends his head down so she can slip the halter over his ears and Tella holds onto the lead rope as I undo the girth and remove the saddle from his back.
Tella tells me where it goes in the tack room, so I carry everything for her, before coming back to the wash stall.
“Are the two of you okay in here?” Magnolia calls out as she walks down the aisle. “Great job today, Estella.”
“Thank you, Miss Magnolia,” Tella smiles at her. “Did you know Mia has a horse too?”
“Oh really?” Magnolia says softly, tilting her head to the side as her gaze meets mine.
She looks to be in her early thirties and it’s impossible to miss her pregnant stomach as she absentmindedly runs her hand over it.
“Well, I think you’re probably in great hands then. Let me know if you need anything.”
“Can you hold him for me?” Tella asks as Magnolia walks away.
“Of course,” I say, taking the lead rope as she hands it to me.
Tella grabs a brush and gets to work smoothing out his coat.
She has to get a step stool so she can reach his back.
Sodapop presses his nose against my stomach and I laugh, lifting my hand to scratch the whorl marking in the center of his forehead.
He lets out a sigh, his head sinking as he lifts one back foot onto the toe of his hoof and relaxes.
“Good boy, Sody,” Tella coos, patting the side of his neck before kissing his cheek. She reaches for the lead rope. “We can put him in his stall now and then we have to feed him.”
“Lead the way!” I step out of the way, motioning for her to go ahead of me. Tella leads Sodapop down the aisle to the last stall on the left, where she takes him inside, removes his halter and comes back through the door.
Tella shows me the feed room and we mix his food before pouring it into his feed bin together and dropping a flake of hay in the rack in his stall. “That’s it,” she tells me before turning back to her pony. “See you in two days, Sodapop. Love you!”
He lifts his head and blows out a breath, almost as if he’s responding to her. There’s a softness, a tenderness in his eyes as he stares at her, dropping his nose back into his feed bin.
I turn to Tella and say, “All right, T, let’s head home.”
Tella walks beside me as we slip out of the barn.
She moves closer to me and her warm hand slides into mine, curling her little fingers around my hand.
I glance down at her, watching as she gets a little bob in her step, half skipping.
I bite back a smile, my footsteps matching hers as we head to my car together.
Later that night, just as I’m getting Tella tucked away in bed, my phone starts to ring in the front pocket of my sweatshirt. I pull it out and glance at the screen. It’s Caleb.
“Hello?”
“Hey,” he says, sounding slightly breathless. “Sorry about earlier. We’re heading in to get ready for the game, but I wanted to say goodnight to T.”
A warmth floods my chest. “Yes, of course.” I pull the phone away from my ear, holding it out to Tella. “It’s your dad. I’m going to go brush my teeth while you talk to him.”
“Okay,” Tella says, taking the phone from me as I walk toward the door. “Hi, Daddy!”
I make my way down the hall to the bathroom and get myself ready for bed. I thought it would feel weird, staying at his house like this, but it really doesn’t. I think it helps that Caleb is not here. He doesn’t make me uncomfortable, not in a bad way at least.
I’m not blind, nor am I immune to the man.
His eyes are a striking grey, his jaw bone perfectly chiseled with a straight nose that leads to his perfect, subtly plump lips.
I’m allowed to think my boss is attractive, even if it’s not reciprocated.
Based on Caleb’s comment about not dating, I can’t help but wonder if he’s dated anyone since his wife has passed.
I’ve never been in his situation. I can’t imagine what it must be like to try and move on, but then again, maybe he doesn’t want to. Maybe he wants to live with the ghost of her for the rest of his life.
And who am I to really judge?
I finish up in the bathroom and head into Tella’s room, just as she’s finishing up her conversation with Caleb. She says goodnight to him, a sleepy smile on her lips as she hands the phone to me.
“He wants to talk to you,” she says around a yawn as she stretches in her bed before nestling against her pillows. “Goodnight, Mia.”
“Night, T.”
I pat the top of her head, then put the phone up to my ear as I walk back out of her room, leaving the door ajar behind me. “Hey again.”
“Hey,” Caleb says, his voice soft, yet gruff. “Sorry about earlier.”
“It’s okay,” I tell him, my footsteps light as I head down the hallway and into my room. I gently push the door behind me, leaving it ajar like Tella’s as I slip into bed. “You’re supposed to be worrying about work, not what’s going on here.”
Caleb is silent for a moment. “I know,” he says quietly followed by another beat of silence. “It’s just hard for me sometimes.”
“I understand.” I swallow roughly over the lump in my throat. “I can’t pretend to know how it feels for you, but just know I understand to a degree. My father hated leaving me too.”
“Was it just the two of you?”
“Yeah,” I admit, letting out a soft breath as I pull the covers up over my body and settle in against the pillows. “My mother died when I was born. They were young so he had a lot of growing up to do, on top of being terrified of losing me too.”
“I’m sorry,” he says, his voice barely audible. “For your loss.”
“It’s okay,” I tell him with a half shrug even though he can’t see me. “I never got to meet her so it wasn’t as bad for me as it was for him.”
“Similar to Tella,” he murmurs. “Amelia died before T’s first birthday. She’ll never remember her.”
My chest constricts, my throat tightening as the sadness seeps through the phone.
“I’m sorry,” I say, my voice cracking around the words.
I swallow hard, closing my eyes. There’s nothing else I can really say.
Nothing is going to change the truth behind his words.
“She might not remember her, but that doesn’t mean you can’t keep her memory alive. ”
Caleb doesn’t respond at first and I let the silence stretch, knowing there isn’t much else I can say to comfort him. He lost her five years ago and I’m sure he’s heard it all from everyone else.
He clears his throat and finally says, “I should probably go. Your father is going to be looking for me soon.”
“Don’t want that,” I laugh quietly, opening my eyes to stare at the wall across from the bed. “Good luck tonight.”
“Thanks,” he says, his voice hoarse. “Goodnight, Mia.”
“Goodnight.”
I end the call, but just as I’m rolling over to put my phone on the nightstand, it dings as a message comes through.
Caleb
Thank you, Mia.
The corners of my mouth twitch.
You’re welcome.
Night.
Goodnight, Caleb.
I read over his messages once more, feeling a tug on my heart as I lock the screen and set it down on the nightstand. He’s a broken man who lost himself when he lost his wife. There’s no doubt in my mind that a piece of him died the day she did.
But that doesn’t mean his life isn’t still worth living. He just needs to find himself—to find that spark that breathes life back into his heart.
He just needs someone to show him.