29. Frankie
TWENTY-NINE
Frankie
My heart skittered in my chest as my sweaty palm held tightly onto my phone.
“I want to thank you for your patience and your persistence once again. We know our hiring process is rigid, but that’s why we only hire the best of the best. I really think we found that in you, Frankie.”
I held my breath, wishing he would spit out the words already.
“Which is why we’re thrilled to extend you an offer for the position of Director of Marketing.”
Silently, I pumped my fist in the air. “That’s amazing news,” I said as relief rushed through my veins and I paced the lobby of the lodge. I had been about to leave Marie’s and head straight for the comfort of my bed when I’d gotten the call.
The alert of another incoming call sounded. I pulled my phone away to see Mattie’s name flashing across the screen. I sent it to voicemail and put the phone back to my ear .
“I know it’s soon, but we’d really like you to start at the beginning of next week.”
Everything inside of me sank. That was the original timeframe they’d given me, but I thought with how long they’d taken to make a decision, maybe they’d push it back a week or two.
“Next week,” I repeated.
“We can push it if you really can’t make that work, but we already have trainings in place for other new hires and it would be the best logistically.”
I squeezed my eyes shut and swallowed back the anxiety that swelled in my chest.
“Next week is fine. I’m excited to start.”
My phone buzzed again and I pressed the send to voicemail button without looking at the caller.
“Great. I know you don’t live in New York currently, but we can set you up in a hotel for a couple of weeks while you find something more permanent. It’ll all be in the official offer letter from HR. But you can call me directly if you need anything.”
“Thanks, Neil. I’m so excited to join the team.”
As he went over salary, benefits, and what I could expect for my first week, I tried my hardest to focus on what should be the best news I’d received in a long time. Despite my best efforts, my mind kept glazing over. The triumphant feeling of finally landing the job that had once seemed so elusive had already begun to fade.
“That’s everything. Once again, we’re thrilled to have you on the team.”
“Me too,” I said as brightly as possible.
“We’ll see you soon.”
We said our goodbyes and I hung up the call.
Next week ?
I could hardly believe it.
Next week at this time, I’d be in New York, likely sitting in a cubicle watching some HR training video and looking at spreadsheets. Maybe I’d pass by a window at lunch, see the warm weather outside, and just be forced to imagine what the sun’s rays might feel like while being trapped in some heavily air-conditioned office.
It hit me like a ton of bricks how much I’d taken the past couple of months for granted. At first, I hadn’t been able to shake the feeling of failure. Then I was consumed by job hunting. Even now that I had started enjoying myself more, it still felt fake—like a summer vacation destined to end too soon. It made it difficult to be one hundred percent present.
Before I could dwell on it anymore, Mattie came flying through the entrance to the lodge. Her eyes searched the room in a panic before they landed on me.
I raced to her, dread crashing into me as I took in her rattled expression.
“Mattie? What’s wrong?”
She waved for me to follow her. “You need to come now. There’s been an accident.”
My tears had dried, leaving streaks along my cheeks by the time I was allowed to see him. They’d done an MRI and were adamant that only family could visit.
Giles had called me Oliver’s girlfriend and insisted I be let through. It made me sad to think that would be the only time I’d be called Oliver’s girlfriend by anyone.
The nurses hadn’t seemed particularly sympathetic to my situation, but they eventually ushered me out of the waiting room. The steady beeping of machines and the quiet murmur of families huddled in rooms filled the hallway as I followed her. We eventually turned right, and she gestured toward a door left slightly ajar.
I gasped when I saw him, hooked up to a few machines and a large stitched-up gash along his hairline.
He was still smiling. Of course he was. It was Oliver.
“Hey, fancy meeting you here,” he said, far too cheerily.
Which, of course, caused me to immediately burst into tears.
His smile faltered. “It’s okay. I’m okay. Come here.” He sat up and patted the hospital bed next to him.
“You really scared me,” I choked out, joining him on the cramped bed.
“I didn’t mean to.” He pressed a kiss to my forehead. It wasn’t lost on me that I should be the one comforting him right now, and not the other way around.
I leaned back to examine the gnarly gash on his forehead. “Why weren’t you wearing a helmet?” I demanded, feeling irrationally irritated that he could be so irresponsible. This wasn’t like him. He might prefer his sports more on the extreme side, but I’d never known him not to take the proper precautions.
“I was,” he insisted, but looked down sheepishly when I leveled him with a glare. “I mean, I forgot to strap it, but it was technically on.”
“How could you forget to strap it? You’re always doing crazy shit like this. You know how important a helmet is.”
His grin turned goofy as he tilted his head to examine me. “You’re really lecturing me right now?”
“Yes!” I got up and circled his hospital bed, waving my arms in the air like a madwoman. “You’re about to go teach a whitewater rafting course. You can’t do shit like forget to strap a helmet. What is wrong with you? That’s so dangerous. Ugh, I’m so mad I can’t even think straight.”
My heart pounded as fresh tears threatened to burst free from my eyes at any moment. Oliver was invincible. Lying in a hospital bed was not anywhere I ever expected to see him, and I hated it so much. I felt powerless.
“Hey. Hey. Hey,” he cooed, reaching out and gently wrapping a hand around my forearm, halting my haphazard steps. I jerked my gaze to his, and his eyes softened. “I’m sorry, okay? I know I scared you.”
I let out a frustrated sigh. “Do you know how terrifying it was having Mattie show up at the lodge to tell me you were in an accident?”
“Pretty scary, I can imagine.”
“No, you probably can’t.”
“Yes, I can,” he pressed, rubbing his hands up and down my arms. “I’d feel the same way if someone told me you were in the hospital.”
“Oh,” I breathed. Jitters ran through me at his admission, but I forced my expression to remain stern.
He raked a hand through his hair, careful to avoid his fresh stiches. “Look. It was dumb. I know it was. I don’t make mistakes like that. But I was distracted.”
“Distracted?” I perched on the edge of his bed. A faint beeping sound came from one of the machines he was plugged into. Why was he plugged in to so many machines?
“I…I was thinking about you,” he admitted.
“About me?” I asked in disbelief.
“Yeah.” His eyes dropped to his hands. “It’s stupid, but Giles was talking about you leaving and all of a sudden it was all I could focus on.”
The words about accepting my new job lodged in my throat. Even though I knew that he knew they were coming, sharing them now felt so wrong and gross.
Instead of saying anything, I took one of his hands in mine, letting it ground me.
“I seriously don’t know why I was so distracted,” he continued, the frustration evident in his voice. “I never get like that climbing. I’m always in the moment, and I’m always careful. I guess our looming expiration date was weighing on me more than I realized.”
“Me too,” I said. Not only had it been weighing on me, but my mind was nearly crushed with how much the topic preoccupied my every thought.
“But that’s no excuse.” He smiled up at me. “I won’t let it happen again, but it’s pretty easy to get distracted when thinking about you.”
I let out a small laugh. He could never be serious, even for a second.
“I like you a lot, Frankie,” he said.
“I like you a lot, too, Oliver.” I squeezed his hand. “Now don’t scare me like that again, okay?”
While I desperately wanted to take Oliver home with me that night and spend hours curled up in his arms, assuring myself that he was indeed fine, the doctors insisted on keeping him overnight for observation. They said that because of the size of his head injury, and the fact that he had been unconscious for nearly five minutes, they wanted to rule out anything more serious.
It felt awful leaving him there, but he really did seem fine. The doctors had assured us it was just for an abundance of caution .
Still, instead of going back to Mattie and Giles’s, I went to Oliver’s apartment. All I wanted was to curl up in one of his sweatshirts and sleep in his bed, surrounded by his smell.
Mattie wouldn’t hear of me being alone, so she stayed there too.
I had a hard time focusing on anything except getting back to him, so she put on a movie to distract me. It was a pointless effort. Oliver’s large frame in the hospital bed was all that I could see.
When I wasn’t consumed with worrying about him, my thoughts turned to my new job. I hadn’t even worked up the courage to tell Mattie yet—Oliver was the first person I wanted to share the news with. I knew he’d be happy for me, but it also marked the end of us. It made everything feel more real—more final.
Eventually, I fell asleep with my thoughts still spinning.
Finally, when my alarm went off at seven a.m., I ripped away the covers. Giles was supposed to pick us both up and I wanted to be ready the instant he arrived. Mattie was still passed out on the couch, so I jostled her awake.
“Wake up. Is he almost here?”
Mattie groaned and stretched, before turning over and picking up her phone to check. “He’s on his way.”
I didn’t bother with makeup or brushing my hair before I rushed to the entryway and pulled on my shoes. I flung open the door and almost collided with Giles, who held a brown bag and a tray of to-go coffees.
“Ready?” he asked, but I was already brushing by him.
“He’s going to be okay, Frankie,” Mattie called, still slipping on her tennis shoes and scrambling down the stairs behind me. “They would have called if anything happened overnight. ”
“I’ll feel better when I see him,” I said, pulling open the door to Giles’s truck and climbing into the back seat.
Mattie slid into the passenger side. Giles handed us both a coffee.
“Donut?” he offered, holding out the brown paper bag to me.
“I can’t eat right now.” My foot tapped furiously against the floor as Giles maneuvered the car off of Main Street and to the highway.
“I’m sorry,” Giles mumbled, shaking his head. “We should have been more careful.”
“This isn’t your fault,” I said. “Accidents happen, and Oliver was the one who was distracted.”
“Still, I was there, I should have?—”
“Hey,” Mattie said sternly, grabbing his shoulder and squeezing. “It isn’t your fault.”
The next few minutes passed in silence as we drove the remaining distance to the only major hospital within a twenty-mile radius.
When Giles pulled into the hospital entrance, he went straight to the main entry of the massive building. He placed a hand on the passenger seat headrest, turning his body toward me. “You go ahead, Frankie. We’ll find parking.”
“Thanks.” I barely got out the words before I was out of the truck, walking hurriedly toward the automatic doors that led to the entrance of the emergency room. I already knew which room he was in, so I bypassed the check-in counter and walked straight back. Visiting hours had started, but I still made sure to avoid any nurses or doctors on my way, unwilling to be stopped for anything.
When I rounded the corner to his room, an immediate wave of relief blasted through me. He was already up, alert, and speaking with an older nurse who reminded me of my grandma.
“You take it easy,” she said, smiling and dropping off his breakfast tray. “Be more careful so I don’t see you in here again.”
“Of course, Irene.” He winked at me when he noticed me hovering in the doorway. “You won’t catch me back here, I can promise you that.”
“Good.” She walked toward the door and gave me a small nod when she noticed me. “You make sure that one wears a helmet from now on.”
“I definitely will,” I assured her.
She patted me on the shoulder and walked out of the room.
Oliver sighed dramatically. “I’ve told them all a million times that I was, in fact, wearing a helmet, it just slipped off. No one believes me.”
“It does seem like a lie you would tell to make yourself seem more careful.”
“Giles can corroborate my story.”
I drank in the sight of him, my night of restless sleep catching up with me now that I could see he was completely fine.
“The tests all went well? The doctors aren’t concerned about anything?” I asked, eyeing the styrofoam cup of black coffee in front of Oliver. I’d left the one Giles had given me in the car. I’d hardly been able to drink it with the nerves churning around in my stomach.
Oliver followed my gaze and picked up the cup of coffee to hand it to me. I gratefully took a sip. Too hot, and had that distinct burnt taste, but it still roused my senses.
“Nothing they’re concerned about. They said I should be out of here in a few hours. ”
“Thank God.” I took the seat next to his bed and spilled into it, reaching out and grabbing his forearm to tether myself to him.
Oliver looked at our point of contact, a grin forming on his lips. “Thanks for coming,” he said.
My forehead wrinkled. “I would have stayed here all night if they would have let me. I slept like shit because?—”
“Because I wasn’t there,” Oliver finished, flashing me his teeth.
I squeezed his arm. “Something like that.”
“Well don’t you worry,” he continued. “Tonight, we’ll be back in my bed—or yours, if you prefer—and the doctors gave me the all clear on any extracurricular activities, especially those that can be done in the bedroom. In fact, he encouraged them. Said they would help with the healing process.”
“Oliver!” I scolded, shaking my head.
Maybe it should feel strange sitting with a guy I was only casually dating in the hospital, but it didn’t. Nothing felt weird with Oliver.
I chewed the inside of my cheek before finally spitting out the words I had been dreading. “I got the job. Found out yesterday.”
Oliver’s eyes widened and he sat up in bed. His smile never faltered, but I noticed the vein bulge slightly in his neck. The same way it always did when he tensed. It was so rare, but I’d come to recognize it.
“Of course you did! Congrats, Frankie.” He grabbed my hand and tugged me toward him, wrapping me in a hug.
“I’ve been waiting to hear back for so long, it’s surreal to finally have a start date and everything.”
His grip tightened around me and my heart cracked a little. “When is it? ”
“Next week.”
He pulled away to cup my face before brushing his lips to mine. “I’m so fucking proud of you.”
That familiar burn of tears roared at the back of my eyelids. One escaped before I could stop it.
Oliver’s eyebrows pinched together as he brushed my cheek with his thumb. “No crying on my watch. This is amazing news.”
I let out a shaky breath. “I’m happy.” I sounded like I was trying to convince myself.
“You look it,” Oliver said with mock seriousness.
“Shut up.” I tried to pull away, but his gentle grasp held me in place.
“What’s going on in that head of yours?” he asked.
I sucked in a breath through my nose, trying to sort through my thoughts like I was rifling through a jumbled file cabinet. “I’m happy I got it,” I repeated. “I’m-I’m excited about the fresh start in New York.”
“Then why the tears?” he asked.
“I guess I’m just mourning this.” I waved my hand between the two of us. “This tiny little taste of whatever this was. Dinners with you at Marie’s. You trying to drag me on some outdoorsy adventure I’m bound to be terrible at. Learning something new together—we haven’t even conquered cooking yet.”
“The last dish was almost edible,” he said.
That made me laugh through my tears. “Being close to my sister too,” I continued. “Having coffee with her every morning and seeing her whenever I want. It’s stupid, but I never realized how incredible all the little things could be.”
Oliver wiped away another tear. “That isn’t stupid at all. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed experiencing all those things with you too. And hey, we still have another week of it. Don’t go saying your goodbyes to me already.”
I sniffed and leaned into his hand, letting him tangle his fingers in my wild, bedhead-riddled hair. “I know. It’s just bittersweet.” Even as I said the words, all I tasted was the bitterness.
Oliver offered me a lazy grin. “Why waste energy on feeling the weight of an ending when we should be celebrating what a ride it was?”
That was such an Oliver answer. I forced myself to nod in agreement, but the casual way he delivered those words stung a little.
This was all expected. Me getting a job. Him heading off to another adventure. Everything was right with the world. Yet I found my own personal universe thrown completely out of orbit.
Logically, I knew that Oliver was never going to make some grand gesture, like begging me to come with him. And logically, I knew I’d have no business exploring a life like that. However, the irrational, subconscious parts of me that I’d been working overtime to quell desperately wanted Oliver to make a move. Say something . Say that he couldn’t imagine letting me go. Or say that he didn’t have the answers, but we’d figure it out together. I secretly wanted him to tell me that losing me wasn’t an option.
Finally, I said, “Who knows? Maybe you could swing by New York sometime. I could show you around.”
Oliver’s face fell, and my stomach dipped when I saw the pained expression twisting his features.
“Probably best to remember this as it is now. The perfect, fleeting moment in time.”
I bit down hard on my lip and forced my gaze not to drop. Something like embarrassment ate away at my gut. Here I was, fantasizing about him not letting me go. Meanwhile, he was all too fine with never seeing me again. It wasn’t like he hadn’t been up front about who he was. He wasn’t a long-term type of guy.
It didn’t matter if I had fallen for him. This was ending in the way it was always supposed to. I couldn’t wish for a rule change this late in the game.
Oliver’s eyes scanned mine. “Frankie…” But his words trailed off to nothing as his eyes jerked to the doorway. I turned.
An older woman with dark hair pulled back into a braid entered the room. Her features were dark and her eyes all too familiar.
“Mom?” Oliver questioned.
I sprang from his bed and took a step back.
“Are you alright? The doctors wouldn’t tell me anything.” Her voice shook as she walked into the room.
Oliver sprang up from where he sat perched on the hospital bed, the thing in his arm monitoring something pulling taut as a result. “What are you doing here?” he demanded, clearly in shock.
I winced, feeling guilty. This was definitely my fault.
“Nathan told me, and I caught a flight late last night. I spent the night in the Denver airport, and flew straight here.”
Oliver groaned. “How did Nathan know? I haven’t called anyone.” He pulled his hand from his face and turned to look back at me.
“I texted Lila,” I offered. “I thought Harrison would want to know. He must have told Nathan.”
Oliver let out a jagged sigh before opening his arms and giving his distraught-looking mother a hug. He still towered over her, but she was tall. Maybe five foot ten.
He held my gaze and I tried to pour every little bit of “I’m sorry” into my eyes. He gave me a small smile, and I chose to believe that meant he’d already forgiven me.
“I can’t believe you didn’t call me yourself. My son is in the hospital and I had to hear it secondhand.”
“I didn’t tell anyone because I’m fine,” he insisted. “I’ll be out of here soon. You shouldn’t have wasted your airline miles.”
Hurt splashed across her face and despite what I knew, I felt bad for her. She obviously wasn’t perfect, but it was clear she loved her son.
“I’m going to give you two some privacy,” I said, backing away toward the door.
“Wait,” she called, extending her hand. “I’m Gina.”
“Frankie,” I said, shaking it.
She raised her eyebrows and glanced between Oliver and me.
“I’ll call you later,” Oliver said evenly, before I slid out into the hallway.
I felt guilty as I rushed back to the waiting room to find Mattie and Giles. Oliver would now be forced to spend some unexpected time with his mom because of me. I hadn’t anticipated that result when I’d sent Lila a text about the accident.
A part of me thought this might be for the best. The two of them needed to talk.
Oliver might be an expert at avoiding tough conversations, but it seemed one had finally caught up to him.