chapter 20
The image of Sabrina that had emerged in Charlotte’s mind made Penny look like the best mother on the planet—so much so that
Charlotte called her before going to bed. She’d also sent her and Don a few pictures of the villa, Praiano and Lilly, as she
would have done already if she hadn’t been so torn about the latest developments in her life and her parents’ role in them.
Charlotte could tell how relieved they both were to be forgiven and she felt guilty for ever being angry with them. They’d
faced a difficult decision and felt they’d made the right choice. Considering what she was learning about Sabrina, it probably
was the right choice. Not many people had the kind of parents she’d had, biologically linked or otherwise, and she was determined
to show a great deal more gratitude.
At least she seemed to be working her way through that aspect of the mess her life had become. Anything was an improvement.
She’d just set her phone on the nightstand and curled up to go to sleep when her phone started to ring. Assuming her mother
was calling back to say something she’d forgotten to get in before, she checked. But it wasn’t Penny; it was Cliff.
She’d been ignoring his texts. She didn’t know how to respond to him. Why wasn’t he out having the fun he’d been craving when he blew up their marriage?
She let it transfer to voicemail. Then she sat up and scooted back, using the headboard for support while searching his name
on the internet. She hadn’t let herself look for what had been posted about him lately, not since she’d found that picture
of him with Marija Vidmar. She knew she shouldn’t be doing it now, but the temptation was simply too great.
She found pictures and video clips of him from his last game and the spate of interviews that had followed, but when she discovered
nothing else about Marija or any other woman, a wave of relief crashed over her so powerfully it was impossible to ignore
him again when he called right back. Part of her still insisted that this whole thing was merely a terrible mistake—a nightmare
that would eventually go away and all would be well again. They’d had so much fun together in the beginning.
Bracing for the sound of his voice and the memories it would evoke, she answered.
“There you are,” he exclaimed. “What the hell do I have to do to get a response from you?”
She didn’t owe him anything. Not anymore. But she didn’t want to start a fight. Tonight, after her call with her parents,
she was all about mending fences and finding her old equilibrium. Could that happen with Cliff, too? Could they reconcile
and forget he’d ever asked for a divorce?
It didn’t seem too farfetched at the moment—if she refused to acknowledge the past couple of months and focused only on the
commitment she’d felt when they were together. “I’ve been . . .” decimated, hurt, drowning in confusion “. . . busy,” she finished.
“With what?”
Had he been paying any attention to what was happening in her life? “Starting my new book. Learning about my birth mother. Getting to know Lilly.”
“What’s she like?”
The thought of her half sister caused a warm feeling to bubble up from somewhere deep inside. “Like a fawn that suddenly finds
itself alone and doesn’t know where to turn. She’s always watching what’s going on around her, hanging out on the periphery,
in case she needs to bolt.”
“You and your analogies,” he said, the eye-roll audible.
Charlotte had been trying to convey something that was meaningful to her—the insecurity Lilly felt and what a beautiful, innocent
creature she was. But he was obviously irritated by the way she’d chosen to express it. Or just didn’t care enough to understand.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked.
“It’s just the way you talk. You’re the only one I know who does it.”
“I’m sorry,” she said, stung.
He offered no apology, which was ironic since, in her opinion, he was the one who should’ve been apologizing. “We made the
finals. Did you see?”
Not until she’d googled his name a few seconds earlier. “Yeah. Congratulations. You must be thrilled.”
“I am. I scored twenty-eight points, turned the final game around. We couldn’t have pulled it off otherwise.”
“And the other guys?” She said that to emphasize that he was part of a team, but he didn’t seem to catch on to the fact that
she was pointing out what he always did—and that was make everything about him.
“They helped.”
It was a throwaway statement, as if to say they’d contributed only a small amount. “That’s . . . wonderful.”
“I wish you’d been here to see it.”
“I’m glad you’re being successful and enjoying your career. That’s why you said you wanted a divorce, right? So you can have some fun during your basketball days?”
“Stop it,” he said. “I didn’t mean that the way you’re taking it.”
How else could she take it, especially after he showed up in Vegas with a beautiful model? “Are you still seeing Marija?”
“No. She has no sense of humor, no personality at all.”
“I didn’t know it was her personality you were after.”
“Come on, Char. I know you’re upset. But everyone has second thoughts once in a while. The important thing is . . . I miss
you and I’m sorry for what I did.”
“Are you saying you want to get back together?”
“I do. Life isn’t the same without you. I want to see if we can make our marriage work.”
This was exactly what she’d longed to hear, and yet . . . it didn’t make anything better. She got the impression he was simply
lost, didn’t know what he wanted and was flailing around. Trusting him again would be like walking across a bridge that had
already given way and let her fall through once. Did she really want to take the risk a second time?
“Char?” he prompted when she didn’t respond.
“Would you be willing to let Lilly come live with us?” she asked, just to see how far he’d go to get her back.
“You want to bring your sister here?”
He didn’t sound excited by the idea. But she’d known he wouldn’t be. He wanted kids of his own eventually, but he’d indicated
he wasn’t ready. So why would he agree to become the guardian of one? “She doesn’t have anywhere else to go,” she said, which,
of course, he should already have known.
He hesitated. Then, obviously sensing the trap she’d just laid for him, said, “Sure, why not? This place is big enough for
an army.”
Under the circumstances, it was the only way to avoid looking like a bad guy.
Problem was, she didn’t believe he’d stick by those words, not once she went back to him.
As soon as they ran into any inconvenience caused by Lilly’s presence—something she had to attend at the school when he wanted her to be at his game or whatever—he’d start pressuring her to make other arrangements.
And that was if he didn’t change his mind about her and their marriage again and throw her out.
“Thank you.” She’d said it without any real feeling, but he didn’t seem to notice.
“No problem. So . . . does that mean you’ll be coming home sooner rather than later? I mean, as long as she can come here,
there’s no reason to stay in Italy, is there?”
“I’ve already paid for the villa.”
“So? You’re missing the playoffs!”
“I have a book to write, Cliff.”
“And how much will you make off that book?”
Nothing compared to what he made. That was his point. But it was money she’d need if they couldn’t make their marriage work.
“It’s my career.”
“I get that. But it’s the playoffs, for God’s sake! Tell your publisher you’ll get to it when you can. They’ll understand.”
Just because he could throw his weight around didn’t mean she could. She covered her eyes with one hand. “I’ll think about
it. I’d better go. It’s late here, and I have to get up early and write.”
“Okay, but tune in for tomorrow’s game. It’s going to be a good one. Maybe you can get home before the next one.”
“I’ll think about it,” she repeated and told him good night before disconnecting.
A lump grew in her throat as she stared at her phone for several seconds.
She’d lost more than her marriage, she realized.
She’d lost faith in the man she loved. He’d proved himself to be far different than she’d once believed him to be.
But she knew in her heart that she’d been turning a blind eye to his less favorable traits for a long time.
Too upset to sleep, she texted Jules.
You awake?
To her surprise, she got an almost immediate response.
Just sitting out on the deck, editing a few pictures. Something wrong?
Where’s Sloane?
Sleeping.
So was Lilly, which meant they could get away for a little while on their own.
Will you go for a walk with me?
Where to?
That restaurant—Kasai—if it’s still open. I’d like to have a glass of wine and some tiramisu.
You had me at Kasai.
She smiled. What would she have done these past few weeks without Jules? Thank you, she wrote back and meant it.
“Lilly’s starting to get more comfortable with us, have you noticed?” Jules asked as he watched Charlotte dip her spoon into the tiramisu they served at Kasai’s. Here the tiramisu leaned sweet and creamy, the coffee and booze barely a whisper.
“Are you referring to something specific?” she asked.
They were sitting out on the street, with people strolling between them and the restaurant, at one of five tables that were
all filled despite the late hour. “Today, she took my arm while we were walking on the beach,” he told her. “Can you believe
that?”
She scooped up another bite of her tiramisu. “That’s a bold move. But you’ve been her favorite from the beginning.”
“I’m not sure about that. Even if it’s true, we’re talking about Lilly. The girl who could barely meet our eyes when we were introduced to her not very long ago.”
Charlotte chuckled. “You really like her, don’t you?”
“I do,” he admitted. “She’s a sweet kid.”
“Yeah, well, you’re a pushover,” she said teasingly.
“It’s not just me. Sloane likes her a lot, too.”
“I’ve noticed,” Charlotte said. “She’s losing the fight to stay objective—”