Chapter 8
Brodie’s thoughts went from figuring out what to do with Pansy in the long term to helping remodel the old barn for Tripp. Then it jumped the tracks like a train wreck and settled on all the times that God, Fate, or the Universe—folks could take their pick—had put Audrey in his path.
What do you expect? Your houses might be separated by a barbed-wire fence, but they’re less than a hundred yards apart, his mother’s voice fussed at him.
He was surprised to see both his brothers tearing down the last wall of the house when he parked beside their trucks in the driveway. “Hey, are y’all hungry?” he asked as he got out of his truck. “I brought a sack of burgers from the Dairy Queen.”
“We had Sunday dinner at the Paradise, but I can always eat a burger,” Knox answered and laid down his hammer.
“We’re supposed to be building a pen for Pansy, and besides, y’all don’t have to work on Sunday,” Brodie said.
“We heard this morning that Jesus ate corn on the sabbath because he was hungry,” Tripp told him. “I reckon if God didn’t zap him for that, we can build a pen for a miniature hog. I’ll take one of those burgers, too.”
Knox took three lawn chairs from the back of his truck and popped them open. “Might as well take a little break while we have a snack.”
Brodie sat down in one and passed out three of the six burgers. “Again, why are you tearing down the rest of the house?”
“The boards will make a good hog pen,” Tripp explained. “What happened here to make the bathtub fall in?”
“Long story,” Brodie said.
“Does it have something to do with the fact that your jeans are lying back there in a muddy mess?” Knox asked.
“Yep,” Brodie answered.
“And that you look downright pitiful in that garb you are wearing?” Tripp asked.
“Hey, don’t be dissing my beach shorts,” Knox said.
Brodie finished swallowing a bite of burger and washed it down with a sip of his root beer. “I’m just lucky that I found a shirt and shorts in the trailer, or I would have had to run around with a throw wrapped around me like one of those things that island folks wear.”
“What you are lucky about is that the tornado bypassed the trailer and that I forgot all about having a couple of things stored away when we moved to the Paradise,” Knox told him.
“But your blessings ran out when that pig showed up. Since you seem determined to keep the critter, we’ll be good brothers and build the thing a pen.
Think you’ll be able to leave her all alone tonight? ”
Brodie finished off his burger, wadded up the paper, and tossed it into the sack. “To sleep in my bed at the Paradise and have a whole day and night when I don’t have to see or fight with Audrey, I would leave her alone for a week.”
“Plus having decent clothes to put on your body,” Knox chuckled.
“Two weeks,” Brodie growled. “Let’s get busy.
We’ve got to start fertilizing the orchard and putting down straw around each tree tomorrow.
Glad that we are promised some good sunny days for most of the week.
I’ll be at the feedstore when it opens in the morning to get the supplies.
But right now, I’ve got to let Pansy out of the trailer, harness her up and put her on a short leash, and give her some food and water. ”
“Do you think that maybe having a pot-bellied pig will make it harder for Bernie to find eligible women for you?” Tripp asked.
“That’s the plan,” Brodie grinned.
“Whoa!” Knox put up a hand. “You didn’t tell us how the bathtub fell or why you shucked out of your jeans out here.”
“Like I said, it’s a long story,” Brodie answered.
“Daylight savings started a couple of weeks ago,” Knox told him.
“What’s that got to do with a bathtub?” Brodie asked.
Knox reached over and patted him on the knee. “It won’t get dark for quite a while, so we have time to hear the story. Does it have to do with that broken-down fence and with Audrey? Did y’all have wild mud sex in the old bathtub? Is that the reason it fell through the floor?”
“Yes, no, and no,” Brodie answered.
“Explain all those please,” Tripp said with a wide grin.
Brodie told them the whole story, barring none of the details, and ended with the fence being on his side of the land. “I’ll be so glad to get back to the Paradise so that our paths will be less likely to cross. She’s nothing but bad luck.”
“Amen to that.”
“And speaking of that…” Knox pointed to the truck passing by very slowly. “What do you say we build the pigpen on the far end of the trailer so neither she nor Hettie can fuss about the smell?”
“Sounds great to me,” Brodie agreed. “Do I need to drive back to Nocona and get some wire?”
“Nope,” Knox answered. “Joe Clay donated that and all the nails and screws we need, plus he loaned us a couple of battery-operated drills and hand tools. We should have this job done before the day is done.”
“He had lots of scrap wood, but Knox said we could use the boards from what’s left of the house and kill two birds with one stone,” Tripp added.
Two birds. One stone.
Brodie didn’t want to kill Audrey and Hettie, but if he had a virtual stone or two in his pocket, he might throw them.
You already did! His mother was back in his head. You paid for their flowers and for their food. Stones thrown.
***
Audrey tried to analyze her emotions as she changed into a pair of loose-fitting athletic shorts and a comfortable T-shirt.
She could absolutely wring Brodie’s neck for getting the upper hand when he bought the flowers and paid for dinner.
But before she could muster up enough anger to hate him, she remembered the way he made her feel when they were chasing that stupid pig, and even more so when she had kissed him.
No amount of trying to study how or why she was sitting on the fence when it came to the love or hate situation between them seemed to have answers. She left her bedroom, grabbed a bottle of sweet tea from the refrigerator, and carried it out to the front porch.
“About time you got here,” Hettie said. “I changed into my muumuu in five minutes and made my first drink of the day.”
“Congratulations. You get a gold star,” Audrey snapped, and pointed at the drink in her aunt’s hand. “You are working your way right into those anonymous meetings.”
“Honey, I’m not an alcoholic, and I will not go to any of those meetings.
These little drinks are for medicinal purposes.
They keep my arthritis from hurting so bad.
They also are my mood enhancers and take away part of the anger that would make me get my gun and shoot those Callahan brothers and then go take care of Bernie before the law comes to carry me away to jail.
If I ever run out of whiskey, will you sneak some into the prison when you come to visit? ”
“Nope, so you better control your anger,” Audrey answered. “What do you think they’re doing over there?”
Hettie took a sip of her whiskey. “Making a lot of noise on the Lord’s Day. Maybe I won’t have to do a thing but just wait for Him to zap them for not taking a day of rest.”
Audrey twisted the top off her bottle. “Looks like they might be tearing down what’s left of the house to build a pen for that pig.”
Hettie sucked in long breath and let it out in a snort. “Why would he keep such an animal? Hogs are terrible about rooting up everything.”
“Maybe he wants to use its doodah for fertilizer since he’s all into the organic stuff,” Audrey said with a chuckle.
“Just like Ira,” Hettie grumbled. “Me and Amos could never figure out why he switched from perfectly fine fertilizer to that natural stuff.”
“Why did he take the orchards and gardens instead of the cash crop fields?” Audrey asked.
Hettie finished off her drink in one gulp.
“He and Frank divided the land right down the middle. Ira had been looking into all that natural stuff, hoping to help heal Clarice’s imaginary illnesses.
I guess he figured he would show her that she made the wrong choice when he decided to go all organic with his gardens and the orchards.
Looks like they’ve got the boards torn away from what is left of that last wall, and they’re stacking them up on the far end of the trailer. ”
“Yep, do you want to borrow my binoculars so you can see better?” Audrey teased. “Or maybe we can get them to put up a big-screen television and film what they’re doing so you can watch it better.”
“Don’t be sassy with me,” Hettie snapped. “I thought you were going to lay up in the hammock all afternoon and read a book, and yet, here you are being just as nosy as I am.”
“I’m protecting my interests,” Audrey argued. “I might want to lower my bidding price for his farm if it’s got a tacky hog pen tacked on to the end of that travel trailer.”
“To get these two places put back together, I’ll take the trailer and the hog pen. They can both be burned to the ground or hauled to the dump, along with that pig,” Hettie declared. “My Sunday afternoon nap is calling my name.” She stood up and went into the house without another word.
A butterfly caught Audrey’s attention when it landed on a red tulip.
She forgot all about the romance book she had planned to read that afternoon.
She made a quick trip inside for her gloves and a gardening trowel.
She could easily get all the flowers planted and watch what was going on next door at the same time while Aunt Hettie was sleeping.
“And I won’t have to listen to her bossiness while I do it,” she muttered.
***