Chapter 11 Damon
Damon
Ithought I’d feel immense relief after coming clean about Liam’s dad, but even though it went arguably well, I remain nauseated because of all the things I still haven’t told him.
The next day, we sleep in with plans to hit the slopes later, but it only takes Liam bending forward to try to put his boots on to realize he still isn’t feeling one hundred percent.
“I can totally suck it up, man,” he says, the guilt in his voice obvious. “I mean, we came out here to ski. You shouldn’t not ski just because I still feel like ass.”
Laughing, I stop working on the straps of my boots. “Li, I came here to hang out with you. I don’t care if we ski or not.”
His face splits into a grin.
“Really?”
“Really,” I confirm.
“Oh, thank God, because I was gonna be miserable out there.” He laughs. “I was thinking maybe we could do that snowshoe tour that leaves from the base around two? That should be nice and easy.”
“That’s still a physical activity,” I remind him. “You sure you’re up for that?”
He nods, trying—and failing—to get his boot off. Without asking if he needs help, I slide to the floor, place one hand at his heel, and the other over his toe, pulling until he can slip his foot out.
“Yeah. I think moving would help me feel better. I just don’t think hauling ass down a mountain while I’m still a little weak and wobbly is a good idea.”
“That’s probably a good call,” I confirm. “I’ll go make the reservation.”
Liam is affectionate on a normal day, but when he doesn’t feel well, he is clingier than cat hair. And today is no exception.
“Wait for me,” he says, gathering his gloves, hat, and goggles off the bench next to him.
I’m literally walking ten feet from where he’s sitting, but that’s too much distance. My chest pinches with how much he needs me and how much I wish he needed me in other ways.
Holding the door open for him, I let him walk by and follow him into the house.
“Where are you going to be?” he asks, wanting to pick a seat in my space.
“Go lie in bed. I’ll be right in.” He should probably rest if an afternoon of snowshoeing is in our future.
I stare in awe as he strips his layers while walking down the hallway toward my room. Of course, he would choose my bed.
I know he would feel terrible if he knew how hard he makes it for me sometimes, which is the biggest reason I’ve kept my mouth shut all these years. I’m so fucking thankful that I’m his safe place, and I honestly have no fucking clue what I’m going to do when he starts seriously dating someone.
I shake the thought away before the familiar queasiness pools in my stomach, and I make the call to the base lodge to book our tour.
Once the reservation is done, I steel myself as I make my way toward my room. It doesn’t help, though, because the sight of Liam, propped up against my headboard, shirtless and clutching a pillow to his chest while watching whatever he put on the TV, has me fucking sweating.
I don’t understand what’s going on.
Why is my attraction to him so fucking strong this time?
Is it because Taylor finding happiness with his new boyfriend called my loneliness into sharp relief?
I honestly don’t know, but it’s getting harder to conceal with each passing second.
And unfortunately, Liam notices.
Wincing when he sees me standing in the doorway, he apologizes. “Sorry. I hope it’s okay that I crashed in your bed? Your view’s better,” he says, waving a hand toward the open curtains.
I hadn’t even noticed that it’s snowing again, or that the muted sunlight reflects off the slope, highlighting the skiers as they sail past the turnoff for our cabin.
I hadn’t noticed that you can just make them out through the pine branches.
Hell, I hadn’t noticed there were other people at this resort at all.
Because all I see is him.
Forcing a smile, I reassure him. “It’s okay. You know anything of mine is yours, too,” I remind him again.
“I would say ‘same,’ but you already know that since you were wearing my shirt when I got back the other night.”
He’s laughing, but his statement makes me freeze. I was hoping he’d forgotten about that.
I’d needed to feel close to him, wanted his scent to envelop me, and it was the best I could do.
“I’m sorry for running out on you like that,” Liam finally says in a rare, serious moment.
“You don’t have to apologize,” I say, wanting to ease his discomfort. “I know it was shocking to hear. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I just didn’t know how.”
Liam pats the bed next to him.
“You’re forgiven. Now come veg with me for another movie before I have to get my lazy ass in gear.”
I swallow hard before stripping out of my snow pants.
Thankfully, I still have long johns on underneath as I climb onto my bed.
Too afraid of my body’s reaction if I were to get under the covers, I try to keep a decent amount of space between our bodies without making it seem like I’m avoiding Liam.
But that plan gets shot to hell when he worms his way over to my side, puts his head on my shoulder, and wraps his motherfucking arm across my torso.
“I could never stay mad at you, D. I’m just glad there aren’t any more secrets between us, though, because that shit sucked. I understand why you didn’t tell me, but promise me you won’t try to protect me like that anymore? I can handle the truth.”
But with the truth comes the possibility of rejection…and that’s not something I can handle.
Fuck. My. Life.
The snowshoeing tour is more fun than I thought it’d be. It was also more challenging than I’d expected, and despite taking yesterday off from skiing, I can still feel the fatigue in my legs.
Liam, of course, makes it look like he’s just taking an afternoon stroll on flat pavement. He chats with others in the group the entire time, not even out of breath.
He’s so outgoing and makes everyone laugh so easily.
I love seeing him in his element, but apparently, some jealous, insecure asshole has moved into my brain because I want to keep him all to myself.
My jealousy makes me sulky and moody, and while others in the group are getting to know him—and obviously falling in love—I stay silent, keeping to myself toward the outside of the group.
Noticing my silence as the tour comes to an end, Liam moves closer to me and slings an arm across my shoulder as he introduces me to a couple of guys he spent most of the tour talking with.
“Owen, Storm, this is my best friend, Damon. D, meet Owen and Storm. They’re visiting from North Carolina, too!”
I nod my head. “Nice to meet you.”
Storm resembles his namesake. He certainly doesn’t wear his emotions for all to see like Liam.
He also keeps a close eye on Owen, watching the man intently with every interaction.
Storm’s closer to Liam’s height than mine, but he has my build.
Yet somehow, even though he’s not physically imposing, his demeanor makes it feel like a storm is brewing.
Perhaps his mother could feel it in her womb, and that’s how he got the name.
“They own a bed-and-breakfast on the coast. Isn’t that cool?” Liam’s eyes are alight with sincere happiness over learning all about their B&B. “It’s so beautiful. Owen, show D that picture you showed me.” Looking back at me, he says, “You’re going to love this.”
And of course, I do.
It’s a gorgeous oceanfront beach house that could easily sleep twenty people. Petulant dark waves crash on the shore just beyond it. It has a very regal, moody vibe that reminds me of New England…kind of like the owner himself.
“Wow,” I utter. It’s not the most eloquent thing I could have said, but I’m at a loss for other words.
Owen beams. “This is my favorite picture. It was taken in the eye of Hurricane Eloise. There’s something powerful about being in the middle of the storm, you know?”
“I knew you’d like it,” Liam says proudly, turning to me. “Maybe we can go visit?”
“The fall is beautiful,” Storm says, speaking for the first time.
Something in his tone, or maybe it’s the way he’s looking at Owen, makes me unsure if he’s talking about the season or something else entirely.
“Although the storms do tend to pick up in those months.” Then, changing subjects so fast it makes my head spin, Storm says, “Liam tells us you work in computer security?” He speaks slowly, like the world and everyone in it runs on his timeline.
“That’s right,” I confirm, glad this conversation is taking a turn somewhere more comfortable.
“Perhaps we could discuss business over cocktails this evening?” Storm asks. “Our system has been hacked twice since opening. And although we know who’s behind it, we can’t seem to keep them out.”
“I’d be happy to,” I reply. I love my job and am always happy to help where I can.
Plus, it’s comfortable ground for me, and I hate to say it, but I could probably use a little distance from Liam until I can get myself under control.
Cocktails with strangers while discussing business sounds perfect.
“Oh, wonderful!” Owen pipes up. “Liam, I can answer all your questions about the B&B while the men talk business.” He pats Storm’s chest lovingly, and something dark flashes in the man’s eyes.
“Sounds great!” Liam says, not picking up on the intense vibe between these two.
So much for distance.