Chapter Two
Ellis
This is a terrible idea.
But how can I say no? I told myself I was imagining Liam when I saw him across the room, it was a flash of him in the crowd and I convinced myself I was imagining him. Why would he be interested in approaching me? We were in a bar full of other beautiful women who weren’t his ex, so he had no reason to notice me. But there was no mistaking it: the way he walked, the sound of his voice. It was Liam.
He is looking at me like he craves me after all these years, but that’s how he must look at all the girls. With his following, he can’t be short of options. But to feel this desired one more time, I can’t pass that up. Not many people want to commit to the woman with no spare time and bucket-loads of emotional baggage. But as Liam slides into a taxi besides me I can feel the waves of desire coming off him.
“Fuck, I’ve missed the sounds you make,” he murmurs against my jaw, goose bumps cover my arms.
“One night Liam,” I say again. I don’t know who I am trying to convince. Mister Big Shot NHL isn’t going to want more than one night with me. For him, this is just convenience, or nostalgia, but for me it’s a night of freedom from all my responsibilities. Lyndsey, my best friend and only employee, is opening the shop tomorrow and was more than happy to take care of my son, Jack, overnight. Plus, one more night with Liam… It’s too hard to resist.
“I want your number El.” His voice is low and his eyes intense, his gaze makes me squirm in my seat.
“There’s no need,” I remind him. This can only be tonight.
“Ten, nine, eight…” He starts to count down, smirking at me as though he has won. But I’m not the same girl he once knew. His threat of an impending spanking just excites me.
“You can’t just count down to get what you want any more,” I laugh, but the sound is uneasy. My mind feels empty from having his lips on mine.
“Seven, six, five…”
“What? You get to one and I get a spanking, I’ll just enjoy it.” I keep my voice low to avoid allowing the taxi driver to hear every part of our sordid conversation. I kiss Liam again, hoping it will distract him enough to drop it.
He pulls his lips from mine, throwing his head back against the seat of the taxi. “Jesus Ellis, you drive me crazy. I want your number before we get out of this car.”
“Just kiss me instead,” I whine.
“Nope.” His voice is light. The opposite to mine. “Not until I have your new number.” His eyes shine with satisfaction. I want him, he knows it. And if giving him my number is what it takes, then fine. I guess he can have it.
“Jesus Liam, fine!” I snatch his phone from his hand, I think for a split second about putting in a fake number, but knowing my luck he will call it now to make sure it works. Needing his hands and lips on me again, I jab my number in and toss it back at him. “Now kiss me. Just for tonight.”
“If that’s what you’ll give me.” He kisses me again as the car stops.
Scrambling out of the door in the dark, I can’t make out much of the house. I know I’m not going to be spending a lot of time here. One thing I do see is the white rendered concrete wall beside his front door as Liam pins me against it while he gets out his keys. He fumbles with the lock, finally opening the door and ushering me inside. I am barely through the doorway before my dress is bunched around my waist and his hands are palming my ass cheeks.
“I’m going to count down and if you don’t get upstairs and in my bed before I get to one, I’ll turn this ass as red as your dress.” He spanks me lightly to get the point across, but I know he isn’t bluffing.
“We’re playing games again now? I told you, I’ll like it.” I raise an eyebrow, my heart thumping.
“Let’s see who wins.” He winks at me.
I hesitate. “Wait I don’t know where your room is?” I glance behind me at the staircase.
“Then you better run quick Sunshine. Ten, nine…”
A part of me was looking forward to a slower look around Liam’s home. There are only a few lights on so I can’t see the details of the rooms. I can see trophies on shelves and a large brown sectional, but the little parts that would make it his are a blur to me. After all this time apart, I want to see who he has become. How much he has changed. Or is he the same boy I’ve always known? The same one I fell so hard for once upon a time.
I want to pretend that he is, just for now; I want to pretend we’re both the people we were. Teenage puppy love, no worries except our finals and each other to lean on no matter what we had to face. But there’s no time to snoop around as I kick my heels off and take for the stairs even though it is a win–win for me, either way I get great sex just with or without a spanking. Tonight, I would choose without, I’m too desperate to wait. It has been a few months since I last had sex and a few more still since I had good sex.
From downstairs I hear Liam getting closer to zero, and I know if he finds me before I find his bedroom he will live up to his name. Liam “Ruin” Ruinsky is going to ruin me, if he hasn’t already. That damn nickname always seemed so childish to me but seeing him now as a man with more muscles than I could count it suits him more. I can imagine the fear in opposing players’ eyes when they have to come stick to stick with him.
Salvation comes to me in the form of the third closed door I peer into as he shouts “One” from the base of the stairs, his footsteps thunder around the house but I’ve found it. The first room was a towel closet and the one next to that was a large marble-covered bathroom but this is his room, I know it as soon as I step in. Dark grey walls and floor-to-ceiling windows frame the four-poster bed. I know it isn’t a guest room because of the broken hockey stick from his final college game pinned to the wall.
Out of the corner of my eye I see him run from around the corner. I launch myself onto his bed, kicking my dress off as I go. I silently praise myself for having worn a matching underwear set. Though I originally went out with no real intentions of anyone seeing it, Liam changed that mindset quite quickly. He always had that ability. By the time he makes it to his room I’m in nothing but the black lace set. Both of us are breathing hard, but the slow smirk that flashes over his face when he finds me makes me breathe harder still.
“Now that is a beautiful sight,” he says, leaning his hands on the crossbar of the door frame scanning me from head to toe, not rushing himself. “Shame I’m going to have to mess it all up.” His strides are slow as he walks to the edge of the bed but my heart is still racing, my eyes are bouncing all over his body. It doesn’t matter that I am near naked and he is fully clothed, because I know what’s underneath is going to be worth it. Before I manage to get in my own head about how much my body has changed over the years, Liam grabs me by the ankles and tugs me down the bed.
The thud of his knees hitting the plush carpet wipes every thought out of my head except for anticipation. Mr Ruinsky loved to eat me out. It was like he could never get enough, he would say that he played better if he could still taste me when he stepped out onto the ice. And who was I to fight that? I was a twenty-year-old who had never gotten head before. Now he looks up at me once again from between my thighs, his eyes half lidded as he nuzzles against my thigh inhaling as though he’s found the sweetest aroma. Always a tease, he pulls my underwear down my legs slowly. He has all the time in the world apparently, not the one night I have promised.
“Liam, do something. God, please I need it,” I beg aimlessly into the otherwise silent room.
“So sweet when you beg Sunshine.” He smirks, finally pulling my underwear off completely, tucking them into his jeans pocket.
With his eyes still locked onto mine he dives in, licking me from bottom to top. Once he has a taste it unleashes something. I don’t know if it is from years apart or if he has developed even more love for eating pussy, but he lets out a growl before burying his head between my thighs. He makes a mess of me, his tongue fucking into me for a few seconds before switching to licking and sucking at my clit. The sounds of him lapping at me mix with the moans I fail to hold back. One of my hands threads into his hair, he moans against me as I tug on his longer locks and the vibration of the sound triggers the first wave of my orgasm. I am on the cusp and he can tell because he slides two of his long fingers into me as my thighs begin to shake around him.
While I recover I enjoy the view as Liam pulls his shirt over his head and finally unbuttons his jeans. He must be uncomfortable, his dick is big and those jeans are so tight I’m surprised he even has enough blood in his brain to stand, never mind anything else. I gather enough sense to unhook my bra. I might come again just from the way his eyes drop to my chest and he licks his lips. Why does he have to be so sexy? How does he still have this effect on me after all this time?
Liam drops his boxers and my heart starts to thump again. I had convinced myself that I was exaggerating when I thought about his dick over the years, that I was tricking myself with blind nostalgia. But I was right. The man is as hung as I remember. As he starts to crawl over me, I back myself up the bed until I hit the plush pillows, throwing myself down amongst them. The warmth of his skin sends shivers over me as he gets closer.
“Do I need a condom?” he asks, his voice a whisper against my heated skin.
“No, I’m on the pill,” I tell him. Perhaps a reckless decision, but I still trust Liam – I know that if he thought for a second he has an STI he wouldn’t suggest this, so I give him the go-ahead. I can’t wait a moment longer.
Once his weight settles between my thighs I have a sudden moment of clarity. This is probably a very stupid idea , I think to myself , he’s still your ex . But before I can give it enough thought, Liam lifts my thigh over his hip and notches his cock into me. There are no thoughts in my mind other than Liam. His dark eyes are my only warning as he thrusts, stealing the air out of me.
“Fuck Ellis, you’re so wet for me,” he says, his arms shaking beside my head from the force of staying still until I am used to his size. I squirm beneath him, adjusting myself until I find my hips moving naturally against him.
I can feel all of my muscles starting to relax while he starts to rock his hips in time with mine before he starts to fuck me harder. Faster. Deeper. He is fucking me as though my body has always been his. I wonder if a part of that is true. Nobody has been able to reach as deep in me as Liam.
“Liam, don’t stop. You feel so good. Ah fuck.” I babble as I bring my other leg to wrap around his waist digging my feet into the base of his spine.
He groans against the heated skin of my neck between his kisses and bites. I’m way too old to have a hickey, but it feels way too good to tell him to stop.
He pounds into me from above, but I tug on his hair to pull him from my neck just to see his face. Without slowing his hips, he snakes one of his hands down my body, circling his fingers around my clit. I wanted to watch his face but the power in his eyes is more than I was expecting, than I can take. There is something in them that I don’t have the capacity to place, but it seems dangerously close to longing. His cock hitting my G spot and his fingers on my clit throw me over the cliff into my second orgasm. There is a telltale feeling of him throbbing inside of me before he slams himself as close as possible before coming inside of me.
He regains some strength, breathing deeply on top of me. With a final, guttural sigh, Liam rolls us both over so that we are lying facing each other, my thigh still hitched over his hip, still buried inside me. I can see Liam is trying to find some words to say, but I have forgotten every word I have ever known.
“I know it’s just one night El, but at least stay until the morning?” His words break the silence. I couldn’t turn him down if I tried, so I nod.
I know if it’s going to be one night, I’m going to make it count. I don’t know when I will get another night like this. After three more rounds: one in the shower, one against the bathroom wall and another in the bed, Liam falls asleep while I lay on his chest. I know I said I would give him until morning, but if I don’t leave now I’m not sure I ever will.
Just like I did ten years ago, I leave him again. Quietly, I tap away at the Uber app on my phone, patiently, nervously tracking the driver. Years ago, I left him with the shreds of my heart and a bright future ahead of him. Back then, I wanted to see him succeed and I know he couldn’t have done that with me hanging around. I told myself that if anything is truly meant to be, then we would find each other. But this doesn’t feel like how I imagined. I thought our lives would be simpler. He would have retired and be ready to settle down, I would have my pain in order. We would finally be perfect and we could ride off into the sunset. I don’t want to be here when he realises that this one night of fun was all he wanted. I don’t think I would survive the “it’s been fun, I’ll call you sometime” conversation.
Even as my mind screams at me to go back upstairs, to stay at his side for just a few more hours, my heart knows it would hurt too badly. I pause downstairs, opening a couple kitchen drawers quietly until I come across a notepad and a handful of pens. I scribble quickly as I notice headlights approaching outside, my hand shaking slightly with indecision:
It was good to see you.
I’ll miss you.
Sorry for sneaking out, but I guess I’ve got to go back to real life.
Your Sunshine x