Chapter 5 Heath #2
That is if she wants to. I’d never want to take away her choice in any matter. But I hope she chooses me, because I choose her.
“Then why didn’t she just tell me? Is there something in me that made her feel like she couldn’t tell me?” Marie asks Sebastian who looks down at her with such sadness. She always blames herself. It looks like even therapy hasn’t helped her in letting go of that habit.
“No, baby. No!” Sebastian says softly.
“I tried to be good to her, Sebastian. I really tried.”
“I know you did. I swear it’s not you.”
“Then?”
“She was scared.”
“But—”
I intervene knowing I have to put her head at ease. “She didn’t tell me either and I asked her a lot of fucking times. Sebastian is right. She was scared.”
Marie narrows her eyes on me. “I don’t even want to talk to you. You knew and you didn’t tell me.”
“And I had a very good reason for it. Sebastian agreed.”
“Hey! I did not.”
“You did?”
They both speak at the same time.
I sigh and run a hand through my hair. “Fine. He wanted to tell you, but I asked him not to. Not until we tackled the situation on our own.” I meet her gaze.
“I know you, Marie. You would’ve jumped in front of her dad to save her, and I didn’t want it to be you.
It had to be me. I’ll gladly take a hit for Hope—and I know you will too. But as I said, I was protecting you.”
Marie sniffles. “I want to hug you and punch you at the same time.”
My lips tug upwards in a smirk. “What will it be then?”
Pulling away from Sebastian, she comes in my direction and wraps her arms around my waist and squeezes once. Then comes the punch.
I wince and glare at her.
“I think it’ll be both,” she smirks back.
“Maybe I hate you,” I grit.
“Then I guess our feelings are mutual.”
Sebastian wraps an arm around Marie’s stomach and tugs her backward. “Calm down, baby.”
“I’m mad at you Heath Travon. You got months of groveling to do.”
I roll my eyes. “As if I care.”
“You will when I stop speaking to you.”
“I think I’ll finally find peace.”
“That’s what you think, but I know you’ll hate it.”
“You can think whatever you want, Blondie.”
“What makes you think I’m not. When I close my eyes—” she closes her eyes “—I see you buying me lots of cupcakes, my favourite winter drink everyday for a month and trying to talk to me.”
“Keep those eyes closed for a long time because that’s the only place where I’ll be groveling.”
Marie opens her eyes and grins. “You never know. A lot of strange things happen.”
“What do you mean by that?” I arch an eyebrow.
“You see, a few months ago you were walking around with an empty heart. But now your heart is filled with love. You’re always thinking about Hope.
And when you’re near her, you can’t stop looking at her.
And I saw you kissing her. You couldn’t stop.
The guy I knew would never fall hard for a girl, but look at you now. ”
My heart drums inside my chest.
Those words are not words. They’re facts.
Marie knew it from day one. Just like Sebastian.
Lifting my head, I let my gaze set on Sebastian who’s watching me with a smile. Asshole. I bet he’s dying to say something obnoxious to me.
Fall hard for a girl.
That’s ridiculous. I’m not in love with Hope. I just have feelings for her—feelings that won’t go away. The fact should bother me, it doesn’t. As long as they’re here, I’m connected to her and I crave that connection. I want her. And I want her bad. But that’s all there is to what I feel for her.
Not love.
Definitely not love.
“Marie, you’re annoying.” I can feel heat in my cheeks.
“Maybe, but I don’t care. Sebastian said what truly matters is what you think of yourself.” She presses a soft kiss to his cheek and leans back in her chest.
I don’t even know why she pays hundreds of dollars to that therapist when she’s got a brilliant one right by her side.
Standing up from the couch, I ask, “So, are you coming with me or not?”
Marie nods. “I am.”
“For fuck’s sake,” Sebastian murmurs. “Didn’t you guys hear me? I don’t want you two to go there.”
“We just want to make sure Hope is okay,” Marie says softly.
I stay quiet, letting her take the reins of this request because only then it’ll be granted.
“Me too but—” he rubs his temple. “Don’t give me the puppy eyes, baby. Don’t fucking do it.”
A smile tugs on my lips and I have to rub my lips to not make it obvious.
“Marie, you can have anything but this, baby,” he pleads.
Marie goes a step further and grabs his hand. “Please, Sebastian. I want to make sure that Hope is okay.”
“I can’t have you in that house.”
“Please.”
“He could hurt you.”
“Please.”
“We don’t know what will happen.”
“Please.”
“I’m telling you—fuck! Fine. We’ll go. But only on one condition.”
Marie throws her arms around his waist and eagerly nods. “Anything.”
“If her parents are at home, we won’t go anywhere near her house, do you hear me?”
“But how would I check up on Hope then?”
“You won’t.”
“But that’s the reason we’re going.”
“I know but you’re the most important person in my life. I can’t let anything bad happen to you. You’re all I’ve left, anyway.”
Marie shuts up for good and silently gives him a nod in agreement.
Sebastian said Marie can’t go inside, but he never said anything about me.
————————————
Sebastian wasn’t kidding. He was serious about not letting Marie and I go inside. For the past ten minutes we’ve been sitting in his jeep, watching Hope’s house like creeps, searching for any signs whether her parents are home or not.
“Maybe we should knock on the door and check?” Marie says.
“No!” Sebastian quickly shuts her down.
“Then how would we know?”
“We wait.”
“We’ve been waiting for more than ten minutes. It looks so quiet and lonely. Like no one lives there.”
“That’s exactly where people like them live,” his voice is heavy with memories.
“Her mom would be at work. Hope told me she works a lot. So that means her dad…” Marie shakes in her seat. Her hand covers her mouth as she stares intently at the house.
“Marie, hey, look at me. Calm down.” Sebastian reaches over and places a kiss on her temple and wraps his arm around her.
“Hope is alone… with him,” she whispers.
“We don’t know that.”
Marie takes a deep breath. Turning her head she looks at him. “We need to help her, Sebastian.”
“We can’t. This is a dangerous situation. You could get hurt.”
“It'll be worth it,” she replies.
Sebastian cups her face and leans his forehead against hers.
“I’ve been through shit like this. You know that, baby.
Because of me you got hurt and it killed me.
You know it killed me.” He meets her gaze.
“If that man hurts you, Hope will be devastated and she will push you away to protect you. Just like she’s done for the past months. ”
“But who will protect her? Who will save her? She’s so… fragile. How can he hurt her?”
Those questions feel like arrows hitting me in the chest.
“For fuck’s sake.” Moving back from the centre of the front seats, I open the door when Sebastian grabs me by my arm.
“Heath, what the hell are you doing?”
I give him an annoyed look. “What does it look like? I’m going to check up on her.”
He tugs me in forcefully. “You’re the last person to be going anywhere near that house.”
“I don’t care, because I need to see her,” I reply, my voice tense.
“I know but I think—”
My eyes clash with his and I’m shaking in anger.
“I haven’t heard back from her. Not a single fucking word.
I’ve called her. I’ve texted her. Nothing.
I don’t know if she’s okay or not. And I need her to be okay.
Because if she’s not, then I…” my voice cracks and I hate how weak I’m looking in front of the two of them. “I just need to know that she’s okay.”
Sebastian watches me intently with worry glistening in his eyes. He’s afraid for me.
Between the three of us, he’s dealt with fucked up shit the most, especially with parents so he can relate to Hope.
Even back when I suggested that we swoop in and save Hope he was rational enough to think things through and not let me take a wrong step.
I hate him for it but deep down I know things are complicated and I need to proceed with caution if I want to protect Hope.
“I don’t think you should go but I also know that you won’t listen to me.” He sighs heavily. “You care too much about her.”
Yes I do.
I care a lot about Hope.
More than the limit. If there is any.
Without saying a word, I exit the car and start making my way towards her house. As always, I can sense that something is wrong in this place. Maybe it’s the eerie silence or perhaps the lack of life spilling out of it. Just by looking at it you can tell that this is not a home.
I’m five feet away from the driveway, hoping to go toward the back and climb up to her room when I see a slight movement in the kitchen.
A chill travels down my spine and I prepare myself to face that asshole again.
Sebastian will get so mad at me.
“I suggest you leave,” an old woman speaks from nearby. I recognize that voice. I’ve spoken to her before.
Averting my gaze from the house, I lock it on her. She’s in a pink gown with her gray hair pulled in a braid. She’s wearing jewelry all over, and it’s all types of colors and designs. I’m sure Marie will love this woman.
“I’m not leaving,” I tell her.
She watches me then goes back to moving the sticks and knitting a yellow something that she’s newly begun.
“It’s better that you do. Don’t get the girl into any more trouble.”
My heart drops.
“I would never do that.”
“Why?” She arches an eyebrow, daring me to not lie.
My hand reaches up to my hair, and I run my fingers through it, feeling self-aware. Fuck. Why am I feeling hot all of a sudden?
“Because I like her,” I finally say.
Her gaze snaps up to me and she studies me. “Have you told her?”
“Yes,” I find myself saying.
“Good.”
“You told me to take care of her,” I remember the little chat we had when I came to pick up Hope for bowling alley.
She asked what my intentions were about Hope.
I told her we were just friends. She told me to take care of her.
Something she didn’t need to ask me for.
I’ll always take care of Hope. Even more than myself.
“And it looks like you do. You’re here.”
I nod. “I need to go inside. I’ll see you later—”
“Don’t go. She’s not alone.”
My spine turns rigid. Fuck. Please let it not be her dad who she’s home with right now.
My tone is hard as I ask, “Do you know who’s with her?”
The woman nods.
“It’s her dad, isn’t it?” My hands curl into fists beside my sides.
She shakes her head as her eyes fill with sadness. “Worse. It’s her mother.”
My eyebrows knit together in confusion. “She doesn’t hit her.” I tell her.
The old woman sighs. “No, she does the absolute worst. She plays with her head. She says things to her that hurt her and for years she’s done it.
” She breathes in a long pull of air. “I don’t need to live in that house to know exactly what goes on in there.
I hear and see everything and let me tell you.
It’s no home for a young girl to live in. ”
I stare at her, too stunned to speak a word. I’ve known Hope for a few months and I’ve come to the conclusion that her parents are shit and she is living in a hell house. But this woman knows so much more about this family and hearing her say all these words triple my worry.
Now I want Hope out of that house more than anything.
I want to protect her and keep her safe. I want her to feel good. I want her to be okay.
Will I be able to do that?
“I thought her dad was the worst.” I tell her.
She shoots me a dry smile. “Oh! He is, but her mother isn’t far behind. The two of them are a pair of toxic people who are bound together by love. I’ve seen this film a hundred times in all my living years and I can tell you it never ends well.”
“I need to see her,” I say, looking at the house, specifically Hope’s window. It’s closed.
“She’s okay,” the woman replies with no hint of a lie. “I saw her with my own eyes. She is okay. You better go home.”
“But I need to see her for myself.”
She gives me a sharp look. “Now is not the time and day. Go home before you create any more troubles for her. She’s already had enough.”
The command in her voice makes me turn around and walk back to the car. Her gaze follows me all the way.
I climb in the back and sounds fill the inside.
“Why didn’t you go in?”
“Who was that old woman?”
“Do you know her?”
“What were you guys talking about?”
I close my eyes and lean my head back granting myself a moment to take everything in.
She said she’s okay.
She better be or I don’t know what I’ll do.
On the way to my house, I tell Marie and Sebastian everything and the three of us decide that seeing Hope in school is the safest way. Because none of us wants to cause Hope trouble.
Despite this, my heart and body ache to see her and hold her in my arms. I want her near me so I can calm the chaos whirring in me because having her away from me is unbearable.
I want to spend all my time with her and get to know that she isn’t a stranger to me, but a person that I’ve known since I was a kid.
And God, I want to kiss her. Fuck. I want to kiss her until I can’t anymore.
My lips turn numb and my heart plummets to the ground with beating so fast.
She’s all I want.
She’s all I need.
Monday is so far away when I have such huge feelings for her. But I’ll wait for her.