Chapter 4 – Four Years Ago - Age 34 #2
“We are not family,” she angrily challenges. “You’re her boyfriend. And she doesn’t even love you like I do.” Her words fall desperately. “We could be something, Raph. I can wait for you. Just give us time.” Her voice completely falls apart and shatters before my feet.
“Jesus fucking Christ.” I run a hand through my hair. “This is inappropriate. I’m your sister’s boyfriend and twice your age. You and I will never be a thing, Nicolette. I’m sorry if you misunderstood my attentiveness for something more.”
She balls her hands at her sides, and even with her tears spilling out, the ferocity is unmatched in her golden-green eyes.
“You’re just upset right now,” I tell her. “It’s okay. One day you’ll meet someone more appropriate for you. Someone who will cherish you. Someone who won’t force you when it comes to your first time, but takes care of you through it.”
I try to move a step closer, but she flinches with disgust.
“You think I’m a virgin?” She laughs ruthlessly. “I’ve been with plenty of guys, Raph.”
She eyes me defiantly.
Fucking hell. She’d better be lying.
She’s far too young. Far too innocent.
“I hope that’s not true.”
“Well, it is.” She sneers, her stare filled with indignation, and I welcome it.
She should hate me. There’s no room for anything else between us anymore. Not after that kiss. Not after how it made me feel. I have to push her away. I can’t let that happen again.
“Look, Nicolette. I date women, not little girls. So, whatever that was, you’ll never do it again. Do you understand me?”
“Fuck you,” she spits out venom.
I’ve never heard her speak that way to anyone, least of all me.
I move on her and grip her chin in my palm, forcing her face up to mine. “Say you understand. I need to hear you say it.”
I know I’m doing the right thing, no matter how sick I am seeing her upset like this.
“Yeah,” she grits, shoving my hand away. “I understand everything.”
Suddenly, the door barges open and Bianca struts in, glaring at me.
“Why the hell are you still here?” Her shrill voice is like nails on a chalkboard. “You’ve kept me waiting long enough.”
She darts a look at Nicolette and scoffs. “What’s her problem?”
“Leave her alone. Her boyfriend and her split.” I instantly go on the defensive.
Nothing more unattractive than someone who picks on someone else, and Bianca has no trouble doing that to her sister.
If our lack of connection wasn’t enough reason to end it, her constant mistreatment of Nicolette would do it.
It’s gotten even worse in this past year. I can’t be with someone like that.
Bianca laughs, shaking her head, while Nicolette flares her with a tight glare.
“Should’ve listened to me.” She eyes Nicolette with contempt. “If you actually did something with that hair of yours and put on a little blush, maybe you’d actually be pretty.”
Nicolette’s eyes instantly water over again. All that anger toward me from a second ago vanishes…and in its place is a girl who’s wholly and completely crashing into pieces.
I could just strangle Bianca.
All I want is to hold Nicolette. But I can’t do that anymore. I can’t afford for her to take anything else I do the wrong way. We can’t be how we were.
I guess it’s a good thing I’ll be breaking it off with Bianca. Won’t have Nicolette misinterpreting anything anymore. I can keep her safe from a distance. I’ll get a twenty-four-hour bodyguard on her, and she won’t even know.
I walk up to Bianca until we’re chest to chest. “Apologize to her. Now.”
“What?” she scoffs. “Are you fucking serious right now? Stop coming to her rescue like you’re her knight in shining armor.”
“Apologize, Bianca,” I growl. “Don’t piss me off even more.”
She must notice something on my face because for a moment, I see fear in her eyes.
“Yeah, whatever. Sorry.” She barely even looks at her sister.
“No,” I spit back. “Apologize nicer.”
Her eyes grow as big as saucers, and I swear I see Nicolette’s mouth twitch into a barely there smile.
Bianca’s chest jumps up with her monstrous breaths, and she strikes me with a gaze filled with her ill-fitted temper. But one more look at me, and she’s turning to Nicolette.
“Sorry, dear sister.” Her lips wind into a fake grin before she turns on her heels and marches out the door and down the stairs.
This seems like the perfect time to end it. I can’t even stand the sight of her.
I wander a stare at Nicolette and her face is pale.
Thank you, she mouths.
All I do is nod once.
“Eat,” I demand with a controlled tone.
But inside I’m anything but composed. First that boy tried to hurt her, then I hurt her, and now Bianca is doing it.
She picks up the plate, holding my gaze, and stuffs a piece of lettuce into her mouth.
“Good girl.” My lips jerk, unable to contain that smile. “I’ve gotta go, okay?”
She suddenly looks alarmed, and her entire face crumbles.
It’s now that I really realize this may be the last time I see her, and something in me cracks.
Who will protect her from her family? From all those damn boys who try to hurt her?
What if I can’t do enough from a distance? What if a guard isn’t enough?
Is that why I’ve stayed with Bianca for as long as I have? Did I subconsciously stay to protect Nicolette?
But I can’t worry about that now. I can’t stay with her sister just to protect her anymore. It wouldn’t be right.
Her mouth flutters as though she’s about to say something, but in the end, she doesn’t. She peers at me with those doe eyes, and I feel myself shattering, but I know I have to go. I have to leave her behind.
And it kills me.
With a grunt, I walk out the door to find her sister, to end this relationship once and for all.
I locate her in the laundry room, pacing with a hand on her hip, muttering something.
As soon as she spots me, she puts on one of her fabricated smiles, the ones I see right through.
Closing the door behind me, I hope her parents don’t hear the fight we are about to have.
“Look, Bianca…” I start.
Her hand goes to my bicep, and she massages me there.
“I’m sorry about before.” She laughs nervously. “My sister is just such a pain in the ass, making everything about her. She even managed to rope you in with her ‘woe is me’ act.”
“Bianca, listen to me.” I fling her touch away. “This isn’t working for me anymore. I’m sorry if this hurts you, but we’re done.”
She gasps. Her mouth falls open, her hand flying to her chest.
“You…but…I…” She shakes her head, her heaving breaths spilling out of her mouth. “You’re not thinking. You don’t mean it. You love me. I know you do. I need th—”
She pauses, sucking in a breath and tipping up her chin. The desperation is suddenly gone, and in its place is a woman who is quite different than the one she just was.
“You need what?” I fold my arms over my chest, the sleeves of my suit jacket straining. “Say what you were about to say.”
She clears her throat. “All I meant was that I need you, silly.” Her mouth lifts with a tight smile while she tries to act all seductive, rolling her fingers over my shoulder. “Plus, I was going to give you some news today, but now, I’m not even sure if I should tell you.”
She backs up a step and removes her palm from my shoulder.
“What news is that?” My chest grows heavy.
I don’t like her tone. It’s like she has something up her sleeve. Something that’s going to piss me off.