9. Ivy
Time had a way of spinning out of control. An hour passed in a heartbeat. A year in the blink of an eye. Four in the space of a breath.
Miri and I made up the way we always had, brushing things under the rug and forgiving the worst in each other. In four years, we’d proven our devotion to our friendship and moved into a two-bedroom apartment a few minutes north of campus. Lex and Carter rented the space across the hall, and for the last twelve months, we lived that Friends life. Perhaps most surprising, Lex and I had called a truce on behalf of our proximity. No more public outbursts, no more accidentally disclosed secrets.
As for Carter and me, we promised to love each other as long as we could and kept that up the entire four years. This seemed so easy through the eyes of eighteen-year-old Ivy Washington, young, naive, and ignorant of the cruel ways of fate. We were inseparable. I fell hard for him. Fast. I might have even loved him after that first night. He awoke a side of me only stirred once before by Miri, that sexual deviant, and once she was awakened, we both had a hard time calming her down again.
But like most good things, it couldn’t last forever. Eventually, the rose-colored make-believe reality I’d created within the safety of TW’s comfortable walls crumbled to my feet.
On the day before I was supposed to leave for a class theater trip to Ireland, my parents invited me to brunch at the ancestral family estate in Mount Vernon. I arrived twenty minutes late, so when the driver pulled up to a stop in front of the mansion, I frowned at the Audi A8 sitting next to my mother’s Land Rover, but I didn’t stop to think more about it. It was Lex’s car, and he didn’t mention that he’d be at brunch today when I saw him earlier this morning. That should have been my first clue that all was not well in the state of Denmark, and like Hamlet, our parents were up to some shady shit.
Apprehension growing in the pit of my gut, I climbed the marble stairs to the front door and greeted the man who opened it for me, the butler who had been working for my family for twenty years.
“Your parents are waiting for you on the terrace,” William said.
I smoothed my hands over my hair, brushing it away from my face, and pulled up the political shield around my emotions as I walked through the foyer to the dining room and out the open French doors at the back to the patio.
I froze at the sight.
My parents sat at opposite ends of the table, former Vice President Kellan Fairfax and the Grand Duchess Anna on one side and Lex on the other.
The wide-eyed look he gave me screamed, “Run.”
I took another step closer.
“Ivette, happy you could make it.” My mother gestured to the open spot next to my nemesis.
Except he wasn’t my nemesis anymore. No, in the last four years, Lex and I had formed an uneasy alliance. We didn’t argue, at least not in front of Carter and Miri, and we didn’t poke at each other for the sake of poking. We kept it civil for our friends, and so far, that had worked.
“Apologies for being late.” I forced a smile and sat, wincing at the tension rolling off him in suffocating waves. “Traffic.”
“Well, you’re here now.” My father smiled and picked up his silverware, an obvious attempt at keeping the peace. “Let’s eat.”
His parents flashed their fake grins and placated my father by also starting to dine. Meanwhile, my mother shot me a terse look, which I interpreted as frustration for my tardiness. There and gone in a blink, she refocused her attention on our guests and turned on the political animal, trading old White House stories with Kellan while they ate gourmet eggs and drank mimosas.
Lex avoided looking at me altogether. He sat stone-faced and slouched in his chair, head propped up on his thumb with his tie loosened around his neck. He reminded me of the seventeen-year-old version of himself, the guy with the chip on his shoulder who couldn’t wait to find my buttons and push.
The last time he didn’t have anything to say to me, his older brother had just died. That made my hackles rise even higher.
Whatever this is, it isn’t good.
I opened my mouth to ask what was wrong, but his mother prompted me about the upcoming theater trip and drew my attention back to the conversation.
“We leave tomorrow,” I explained. “It’s a three-week theater intensive in Killwater, Ireland, as part of a sister school exchange program with the local college. We’ll put on a play from scratch for the summer residents, and likewise, they send students here to do the same.”
“Oh,” Anna said, pulling a deep gulp from her champagne. “How lovely. Do you know what play you’ll be performing?”
I shook my head. “We won’t know until we get there.”
Even with the uneasiness in the air, things went on as normal, and by the time we got to the fruity dessert, I had let my guard down. Maybe something happened with Miri. Maybe that’s why Lex was in such a shitty mood.
“So,” my father said. “Shall we talk business?”
I took that as my cue to leave, pushing my chair back from the table.
“Ivette,” my mother snapped. “Sit.”
Confused, I did, dropping my rump back into the seat.
“Now that you’re graduating college,” she said, her ice-cold eyes freezing me to my spot, “it’s time we start mapping the rest of your career.”
“I haven’t gone to law school yet.” I flicked my nervous gaze to Lex again.
“Yes, about that.” Mother drummed her nails against the table, the speculative tone in her voice turning my breakfast to cement. “Harvard is a great option. Georgetown is better.”
“Closer,” my father added.
“Keeps you in the heart of the capital.” Kellan pursed his lips and gave me a reassuring nod.
Lex took a giant gulp of his water.
“I’m sorry, but I’m missing something. I’ve already accepted admission to Harvard.” I pleaded with my eyes for an explanation, my heart beating so hard, my stomach churned and my eggs crept up the back of my esophagus. “Mother?”
“This is what’s best for the family,” she said, narrowing her gaze on me. “You’ll go to Georgetown. It’s better if you’re closer. We can appear more united.”
“Why do we need to appear more united?” I swallowed against a parched throat, praying I didn’t embarrass myself when I opened my mouth again. My anxiety warped into full-blown panic when Lex still said nothing, cleared his throat, and glanced out over the perfectly manicured backyard, avoiding my stare.
“I’m running for president this year,” Kellan said, bringing my focus back to him. “Beating an incumbent is more difficult than another primary candidate. You know this.”
“We’re not doing great in the polls,” my mother said. “He’s got the Washington support, but we’ve been out of the game for a while. People have lost interest.”
I’d noticed. Mother’s second term had ended three years ago, shortly after we graduated from high school and went to college. At the time, Kellan and Anna were still picking up the pieces from Marcus’s death, so they hadn’t tried for the White House. In the absence of headlines, the paparazzi had stopped following us around. They’d left Lex and Miri alone. Things were finally almost normal. Which meant they were about to blow up in my face because now that enough time had passed, Kellan wanted the presidency, and my parents would help him get it.
“We need to get the public talking about the Washingtons and the Fairfaxes again,” Mother continued, her icy-blue eyes imploring me to be reasonable about whatever was coming next. “You and Alexei?—”
“Alexei and I are friends,” I interrupted.
“Ivette,” my father snapped. “Your mother is speaking.”
Evelyn made a show of taking another long sip of her mimosa, drawing it out, letting me sit in silence with my shame.
“You and Alexei are the same age,” she finally continued. “You’re similarly matched in terms of background, and you’ve been friends since you were children. People have photographed you together your entire lives.”
My heart raced. My hands grew sweaty. My gut churned, the acid from the mimosas mixing with the impending doom I saw on the horizon. I knew where this was going.
No.
I wouldn’t do this. I wouldn’t do this to Carter or Miri. I wouldn’t do this to myself.
“A marriage between you would form a perfect political dynasty,” my mother continued. “Not at first, of course. You’ll have to get through law school, but by the time you’re twenty-four?—”
“Yes,” Kellan agreed, cutting Mother off. “Twenty-four. That’ll give you three years to get used to the idea, just in time for re-election.”
“No.” I shook my head, chuckling at the audacity. “No, I won’t do that.”
“What do you mean?” My mother narrowed her eyes at me, and I squirmed, forcing myself to hold her gaze lest she see the weakness in me. I wouldn’t back down from this. She’d had control over my entire life and now that I had my first taste of freedom, she wanted to take that, too. “Do you think you have a choice?”
I scrambled for an excuse, anything I could think of as to why this would be terrible. “And what do you think will happen to Lex’s reputation when he breaks Princess Miriam’s heart?”
“From what I understand, she’s been slumming her way through England most of her life,” Kellan said. “She’ll move on.”
I set my gaze on him, a thousand retorts on the tip of my tongue, each more stinging and horrible than the last. Did this guy know how messed-up Lex had been after Marcus died? Did he care? No, he’d shipped his surviving son off to London and hoped for the best. Now he wanted to rip apart the one person who had reached inside Lex and pulled him back to life?
My friend? My best fucking friend?
No, I’d tell this portly motherfucker exactly?—
Lex placed his hand on top of mine. “Stop.”
Stop?
Appalled, I whipped my attention to him. “You’re okay with this?”
“There are worse people I could marry.” Eyes brimming with unshed tears, he cleared his throat and swallowed.
Shock hit me like a cold, hard slap, and words choked in my throat. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know what to think. Marry him? Marry Lex? My archnemesis. The one person I hated the most in the world.
Marry him?
Carter’s devastating smile echoed through my mind. We’d promised we wouldn’t let our relationship stand in the way of our dreams, but how would he feel if he knew that after we broke up, I’d married his best friend? And not even because I loved the guy, but because my parents told me I had to.
“I’m already with someone,” I said.
“Oh, what? That silly boy from Chicago?” My mother scoffed. “Alexei is worthy of a Washington.”
“So is Carter.”
“Don’t push your luck, Ivette.” She narrowed her cold eyes.
I cleared my throat, choking back the rising bile. “And if I refuse?”
“You’re either a part of this family or you’re not,” Father said, and I recognized the look in his eyes. The one that reminded me who I was. What I represented.
Exitus acta probat.The Washington family motto. The outcome is the test of the act. You do big things, you get big rewards. Lex’s parents needed to win an election, and they were willing to screw over their child to do it. We’d never had a choice, not as children, not as adults. This train never slowed down, never stopped, and it wouldn’t matter what ten-year plan I’d drawn for myself, my mother had her own.
I shoved my chair back from the table and stood, slamming my napkin down on my plate.
“If you’ll please excuse me.” I barely got that out before I stormed around the table and over the patio, back through the French doors to the dining room inside, my mother following close on my heels.
“Ivette,” she called.
Somewhere around the entrance to the kitchen, I stopped and turned to her.
“You can’t do this to me,” I said, eyes burning, vision blurring. “Please don’t make me do this.”
I was so close to freedom. I had law school and my entire future, one without Lex, one that I chose, one that got me into Congress.
“Ivette,” she said again. “Think about this. Think about the things you want for yourself.”
“I can get that on my own,” I said. “They don’t need us. We don’t need them.”
I don’t need Lex.
“Yes, we do,” she said. “The Fairfaxes and the Washingtons have been allies for hundreds of years. The boy has the right name and the right background. This is what you must do. You know it is.”
“This isn’t the Middle Ages, Mother,” I said. “You can’t sell me to the neighbors like a broodmare.”
“Is that what you think this is?” she said. “Do you think your life is your own? Do you think any of our lives are our own?” She took another step closer to me, tsking her teeth and shaking her head with that disapproving expression that used to terrify me as a child. “Do you think I wanted to marry your father?” She whispered it like it was a sin for her to speak out loud. “These are the sacrifices we make for the good of the country.”
“I fail to see how my marrying Lex Fairfax has anything to do with the good?—”
“If the idiot currently in office stays in office, he may never leave it. He’s a fascist, and he needs to be stopped. The only way to do that is to unify our party again.” She pushed my hair behind my ear like she used to do when I was a child. “Trust me, my dear. If there were any other way, I would have taken it.” She gave me a kiss on the temple, like that was supposed to smooth over the wound she’d carved so cleanly inside my soul. “But we don’t always get what we want.”
* * *
I sat silently in the passenger seat of Lex’s Audi, staring out the window at the bustling downtown city below the parking garage at our apartment complex. People carried on with their lives without a care in the world, without the knowledge that right now, a group of maniacal, power-hungry monsters sat around morning bunch, drinking champagne and plotting to manipulate them into voting blue for the upcoming election.
I didn’t know which was worse—being willfully ignorant or an involuntary party to the plot.
“Are you going to tell her?” Lex rubbed his hand over his eyes and pulled on his cigarette, flicking ash out the window.
I clenched my jaw and balled my hands into fists. “I thought maybe you should. Seeing as there are worse people you could marry.”
Lex snapped his eyes to me, recognizing the challenge. We hadn’t talked to each other like this in months. But damn it, my skin felt too tight and my heart raced and all I could see was his stupid silent face as my mother explained why this was going to happen.
Why didn’t he say anything?
Why didn’t he fight it?
“Don’t blame me for this.” He squared his jaw and shook his head. “I didn’t want this.”
I clenched my fists tighter, frustration boiling my blood. “You just sat there and let it happen.”
“I’ve been fighting this for months.” His wide eyes turned pleading, like he was desperate for me to understand and forgive him.
My heart dropped.“You’ve known about this for months?” This asshole. “And you didn’t tell me?”
“What was I going to say?” He stabbed out his smoke in the ashtray he kept in the cupholder. “Hey, Ivy. I know we hate each other, but my father needs better polling numbers. Let’s get hitched.”
I wanted to strangle him.
“You could have fucking warned me. Goddamn it, Lex.” I dug my palms into my eyes so I didn’t cry. They stung, the rage nearly boiling over.
“Listen to me.” He yanked my hands away so I had to look at him. “Stop it, X. Listen.”
I glared at him, my lungs desperate to get air in my body, my molars grinding so hard together, they might crack.
“I know you love Carter. You know I love Miri. There’s no reason to think we can’t go on doing that if we’re together.”
His meaning hit me like a sledgehammer, a consideration I’d never factored into any ten-year plan. “A sham marriage.”
“It was always going to be a sham marriage.” He sat back in his seat and lit up another cigarette. “At least with you, I don’t have to hide anything.” He met my gaze with a tormented one of his own, the hazel of his irises almost completely black now. Lex’s tell had always been in his eyes. “You’ve always known who I am, and I know who you are.”
Yep. We sure did, and we hated everything about each other.
“What happens when our parents expect us to have children?”
He returned that wild stare to the front window. “We’ve got a while to figure that out. They won’t expect it until we’re married.”
“Jesus, Lex,” I said. “You’re going along with this?”
“I don’t have a choice, Ivy,” he said. “Neither do you. We never did. Now we’re in it together, just like we always fucking have been.”
“No,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest, refusing to give in. “No, I won’t do this.”
“What else are you going to do about it?”
“Fight it. Fight them.” I pleaded with him to help me, to see my side in this. We could take them down. We could figure out a way, we had to.
He scoffed and rolled his eyes. “And how are we going to do that? They’re the most powerful people in the world.”
I dropped my jaw open, willing the words to come out, but what could I say? I had no plan, no idea how to get out of this, only that I had to. “I don’t know, Lex. But we’ll find a way.”
“We’re going to Ireland tomorrow,” he said, raising his eyebrows. “We’ll be there for three weeks and when we get back, it’s all over. Miri is going home. Carter is going to California.”
I scrabbled for a plan, for some idea, anything. “They said we didn’t have to get married until the re-election. That’s four years to figure it out.”
Lex narrowed his eyes, ice-cold hazel assessing my idea. “Are you, Ivy Washington, suggesting we defy our parents?” He snorted out a laugh. “Jesus Christ, I thought I’d never see the day.”
“Are you in or out?” This would go much easier if I had him as a partner, but knowing him, he’d act like a petulant snob about it.
“Of course I’m in,” he said. “I just can’t believe you’d have the balls.”
“Aren’t you tired of this? Aren’t you tired of the great game?” The whole thing made me so angry, I could burst into flames. I didn’t know how I’d get out of this, I didn’t know when, but as I sat there in that sports car with my archnemesis turned frenemy turned fiancé, I swore to myself that I would. My mother may have thought she had a collar around my neck, but I was her daughter. I had never gone down without a fight, and I wouldn’t start now.
“The game never stops, Ivy,” Lex murmured, “it doesn’t matter if we’re exhausted.”
I took a deep breath and let it out through my nose, determined to fight for both of us until he had the courage to defend himself. “What are we going to tell the others?”
“I promised Miri no more secrets.” He shifted in his seat, clearing his throat as if the thought made him uncomfortable.
“I’ve never kept anything from Carter.” I didn’t like the idea, either.
“But this?” Lex blew out a dramatic breath. “This is a fucking bombshell.”
I didn’t trust him, I never had, except for maybe one grief-filled night in my room at the White House residence. Perhaps just like that night—we were in this together. If there were anyone I could do this with, it would be him.
“I wanted Ireland to be amazing.” My soul lamented the versions of us that got to go on an incredible trip without this baggage hanging over our heads. “I wanted it to be our last hurrah.”
He grabbed my hand in that gentle, loving way he did the night Marcus died. One simple act of solidarity.
“Me, too.” He gave it a squeeze.
“What if we hold off until I can think of something?” I grasped for straws at this point. “I mean, we’re going to law school. If there were ever an opportune time for us to twist things in our favor, this is it. I’ll find a way to get us out of this, I swear I will.”
He sighed and took a long drag on his cigarette, stabbing it out in the ashtray. “I believe you, X…I just don’t like the thought of keeping secrets.”
I didn’t either. I didn’t like any of this. I wanted to run away with Carter. I wanted Miri to marry Lex and have a million royal babies at their cottage in Scotland. I wanted a world and a life that seemed even further out of my grasp than it ever did. But God help me, I would resist this. I had to. I’d find another way.
He stayed quiet for a moment as he considered, and I watched the change in his eyes when he accepted it. “Okay, Ivy. It’ll be our little secret. For now.”