4. Vance
CHAPTER 4
Vance
Almost one year later…
O nly two more days until I finally get to hold her in my arms again. It's been one long, agonizing year since I've been deployed and every single second has been filled with thoughts of her. But as much as I want to go home and be with her, there's a part of me that fears what will happen when we're reunited. Will she still feel the same about me? Can our relationship survive the distance we've endured? As much as I want to make it back safely for her, there's also a fear gnawing at me about what comes next.
A distant voice yells, “Mail call!” The sound of shuffling footsteps grows closer as the man hands out envelopes. I stay seated on my bunk, my hands clasped tightly around a worn photograph of Blair and I before I left for deployment. When Noah tossed a letter at me, I barely flinch. He smirks at me and says, “Looks like you finally found someone who can deal with your crap.” He raises an eyebrow, gesturing to the photo in my hand.
My face flushes. “Fuck off, Noah.”
As much as I want to ignore my brother Noah’s teasing, there is a small part of me that is grateful for his presence. We may have our issues, but out here in this war zone, having someone you can trust is a rare luxury.
Noah and Jackson. All three of us somehow ended up in the same unit. It is both a blessing and a curse. On one hand, we have each other's backs and know how to work together seamlessly. On the other hand, we also know exactly how to push each other's buttons and get under each other's skin. But with the constant dangers surrounding us, we have learned to put aside our differences and rely on one another for survival. If it wasn't for them, I wouldn't have made it through this deployment.
“Hey,” Liam's voice breaks through my thoughts as he plops down next to me. “Got any plans for your first day back home?”
I shrug, suddenly anxious at the thought of seeing Blair again. “Not really. Just looking forward to spending some time with my girl.”
Mason pipes in from his own bunk across the tent. “Just don't start crying like a little bitch when you see her.”
I roll my eyes at him. But before I spiral into more doubt and uncertainty, Noah claps his hands together loudly. “Alright boys, let's focus on getting through these last two days unscathed so we can all go home in one piece.”
My eyes scan the envelope, taking in the familiar handwriting and heart-shaped doodle at the end of my name, my lips involuntarily curving into a smile. She still misses me. The thought of nuzzling my face into her soft hair brings a sense of longing that runs deep. It's not just about the physical intimacy we share, though that is incredible. It's the little things that I miss the most. Her fingers tracing the lines of my tattoo as she kisses my back, and the way she snorts when she laughs too hard - it's fucking epic.
Blair is the perfect woman and honestly I can’t believe it has taken me so long to go for it. Or well, that’s a lie. My best friend is going to kill me. We have tried to keep things low-key for right now. Neither of us knew how this deployment would go, and there has been no reason to tell him until absolutely necessary. But, now that I’m going back and we are making things official, my jaw clenches knowing things are going to get ugly before they get better.
Her brother and I have been best friends since, what, sixth grade. Ride or die. She is younger, but only by like fourteen months. Yet, he always made it abundantly clear to his friends that she is not to be messed with - and maybe we are both overthinking it, but I assume that is still in effect even though we are both grown.
I tear open the envelope, inhaling the faint scent of her perfume. God, I fucking miss her.
“Hey loverboy, you gonna share with the class?” Jackson teased.
I flip him off, tucking the letter away. “Private correspondence, asshole.”
My heart races as I unfold the letter.
H ey soldier,
I got your letter! You’ll get a good laugh out of this. When I opened it, I was drinking a cup of coffee and when I got to the part where you said you’d be home next week, I spit my coffee out all over Oliver’s coat. Needless to say, even as I’m writing this letter, he is still trying to get it all out. Poor thing.
It’s been a long year, but I’m ready to see you. Your rule about not writing to each other while you’re deployed is an asshole-ish move, but I understand. You want to be able to focus there, and I need you home in one piece, so I didn’t push it.
But… Now I am counting down the seconds until I get to snuggle up to you on the couch and watch true crime documentaries. Oh by the way, I have so many saved to our watchlist for when you get here. I kept my promise and didn’t watch them without you. =)
I know these last few days might feel like they're dragging on forever, but know that I am counting down every second until you're back home with me.
I miss everything about you - your laugh, your touch, even your snoring (well, maybe not that one). But most of all, I miss just being able to talk to you whenever I want.
I'll be waiting for you with open arms and a big kiss when you finally get back home.
Love always,
Blair
T wo more days and I’ll be able to hold and kiss her whenever I want. It’s crazy how a year goes by so fast but so slow. We are constantly moving here, and adrenaline is always pumping, but for her, it must seem like longer. Honestly, I didn’t think she would wait for me. Most nights I wonder if I am going back to her snuggled up to another man. But this letter - it tells me that she’s mine. And I can’t fucking wait.
Jackson glances over. “You okay, man?”
I nod. The ache in my chest intensifies. I want Blair in my arms so badly it hurts. Just two more days.
My mind drifts to our last night together. The softness of her skin. The taste of her lips. The way she gasps my name. Heat floods my body at the memory.
“Earth to Vance,” Noah called. “Stop daydreaming about your girl and focus.”
I flip him off, but he’s right. I need to stay sharp. Get through these final days. Then I can lose myself in Blair completely.
But first, I have to face her brother. My best friend. The guy who has trusted me to have his back through everything. There is no choice. She is it for me. I just hope our love is strong enough to weather the storm her brother is going to bring. This woman has no idea how ready I am to make her mine forever.