Chapter 38
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Riley woke to the sun peeking through the drapes in her bedroom. Smiling, she stretched before burrowing deeper under the covers. Her head and heart warred, the joy inside an odd juxtaposition to the memory of all that had happened the night before.
The guilt that she’d put all those people in danger by her mere presence. That she’d ruined the club’s much-anticipated Christmas ball.
That Trevor had taken a bullet meant for her.
Pressing her eyelids tight, she instead forced her heart’s memory over her head’s. Colton pulling her tight against him. The gentleness of his kiss before desire swept them up into a sea of sensation. His strength of character to pull back before things went too far.
She’d fallen asleep in his arms, awakening sometime in the wee hours to find herself being carried into her bedroom and placed gently on her bed. He’d pulled the covers up to her chin and kissed her softly before she drifted back to sleep.
Rolling over onto her back, she smiled up at the ceiling. The next days and weeks promised to be new and exciting. Learning more about Colton, hopefully being drawn into his family as he’d already been with hers. Growing into whatever God would have them become.
She sat up and swung her legs over the side, catching her first glimpse of the bedside clock. “Eleven!”
She couldn’t remember the last time she’d slept so late, if ever. Apparently, her parents had decided to stay in and watch the church service on live stream. Not a bad decision, since she didn’t wish to endanger more lives. Perhaps Colton would like to watch it together.
After showering, drying her hair, and dabbing on a bit of makeup, she pulled on a pair of 501 jeans and an oversized red-and-white-striped sweater. Deciding against shoes, she wore only a pair of fuzzy red socks.
Her stomach growled, and she checked the clock again. 11:40. Time for lunch. And where was Colton?
She opted to leave her hair down and walked out into the hall. As she neared the foot of the stairs, men’s voices filtered out of her father’s study. Her pulse hitched, and she smiled as she walked up to the door and tentatively poked her head inside.
There he was. Even more handsome this morning than she’d considered him every morning before, even in jeans and a button-down shirt instead of one of his suits. But today he was hers. And that made all the difference.
Her father gestured with his hand. “Riley, come on in.”
“Good morning. I can’t believe I slept so late.”
“Not a problem, honey. I’m sure you needed it.”
Colton nodded in her direction before averting his gaze.
Her smile faded as she walked into the room, glancing from her father to Colton and back, the tightening in her stomach now having nothing to do with hunger. Something wasn’t right.
To the side, standing where she’d first met her then-unwelcome detail, were two men and one woman. “Mack. Hello.”
Mack inclined his head toward her. “Riley. I’m so sorry about what happened last night.”
She glanced at the floor and folded her hands in front of her before meeting his eyes again. “It was … awful. But your guys handled themselves perfectly.”
“Yes, well, that’s kind of why I’m here.”
“Oh?”
He gestured to the two at his side. “Riley, I’d like for you to meet Piper Bentley and Nowell Cooper. Piper, Nowell, this is Riley Hudson.”
She shook their hands. “Hello, Ms. Bentley, Mr. Cooper.”
“Please,” the tall, red-haired man responded. “Call me Nowell.”
The statuesque, blonde woman next to him gave her a small smile. “And you can call me Piper.”
“Piper will be taking over for Trevor for the next week, more than likely,” Mack said. “He put up a fight about having to stay home for a few days, but I finally threatened him with time off without pay if he didn’t comply with doctor’s orders.”
Riley tried to smile around the dread moving through her chest. Something wasn’t right. “Sounds like Trevor. I’m so relieved he’s okay. I was praying so hard.”
“We all were.” He gestured to the man next to Piper. “Nowell here will be replacing Colton. He’ll stay here at the house and will be your point man.”
The floor dropped out from under her, like that momentary weightlessness when a roller coaster crests the highest peak and starts its descent. “What? Why?”
“Not my call. Colton decided it would be best to turn the reins over to someone else.”
She spun back to the man she’d declared herself to, her heart knocking hard against her ribs. “You’re leaving?”
“I thought it best.”
“Because of what happened … last night.”
“Yes.”
Regret clouded his eyes and lined his face. Last night he’d said he wasn’t sorry. Yet he clearly was. And now he was just … leaving. Leaving her. After all they’d shared mere hours ago.
“I see.” She swallowed the lump swelling in her throat. “Then I’ll leave you all to brief my new detail on my schedule and such.” She turned back to Colton. “Thank you for all you did for me. I always felt safe with you.”
Until now.
He reached out and shook her hand. “It was an honor.”
Holding on tight, she held his gaze with hers, the air thick between them with the unspoken. She reluctantly let go of him, letting her fingertips linger at his for a brief moment, knowing it would be the last time she’d ever touch him.
Tears fell freely as she made her way back up the stairs, suddenly not hungry as her heart fell into pieces. In her suite, she curled up in a corner of the sofa where she’d fallen asleep in the arms of the man she loved the night before. The same man now walking out of her life.
Wrapping her arms around her knees, she stared at the window.
Silent tears spilled down her cheeks as her mind fought to make sense of what had just happened.
How could she have been so wrong? She’d believed him when he’d told her he’d be there as long as she needed him.
That he cared about her. That he wanted to be with her.
But it had all been a lie.
She threw her head back, willing control over her emotional state. She hated crying. Hated being out of control.
Yet that’s exactly what she was. Out of control. Loving a man who didn’t—who wouldn’t—love her back. She grabbed half a dozen tissues out of the box on the end table and pressed them against her eyelids.
Breathe. Just breathe. She could handle this. She had to. Colton had left her no choice.
“Riley?”
She pulled the tissues away and stared up at the man who’d pulled her together last night … and shattered her this morning.
Colton walked in and stood inside the door. “I’m so sorry.”
“Sorry about leaving? Sorry about last night? What exactly are you sorry about?”
He gave his head a small shake. “I … I guess about all of it. Mostly about hurting you. I never intended to, Riley. I never wanted to hurt you.”
“Then why? Why did you kiss me? Why did you hold me and say the things you did if it was all nothing?”
He held his hands out as he stepped closer. “Things got out of hand last night. Emotions were high. And we went somewhere we shouldn’t have.”
Against her will, another tear slipped down her cheek. “I’m in love with you, Colton. It doesn’t have anything to do with emotions or fear. It’s simple fact. I know my heart.”
“Riley, you only think you’re in love with me. I’m here in the form of your protector. Someone to keep you safe. I’ve seen it happen before.”
“Oh, you’ve had other women fall in love with you on the job before. Is that it? Did you kiss them and tell them you’d be there as long as they needed you? No wonder they think they’re in love with you.”
“No. I’ve never crossed that line. Just with you.”
She stood to face him. “If I’m only in love with you because you’re my big knight in shining armor, how come I don’t have feelings for Paul? Or Trevor? Trevor took a bullet for me, after all. Why aren’t I fawning all over him?”
“Because Paul and Trevor aren’t available. You’ll see, Riley. Once I’m out of your life for a while, you’ll see it wasn’t me. It was just the idea of me.”
Pain filled every crevice inside of her. “You think you know so much. But you don’t, Colton Blankenship. You don’t know what’s right in front of you.”
“Riley, it would never work with us. Think about it.”
“Think about what?”
“You and me, we’re from different worlds. Polar opposites of one another.”
“This is about my money?”
His sigh came from a deep place. “It’s not the money.
It’s the life. Look at all this. This house where you grew up.
Look at the events and activities you take part in.
Even the clothes you wear. I never owned a tux in my life until I started this job.
And if I didn’t have to wear suits for work, I’d live in jeans. ”
She glanced down at her denim-covered legs and bulky sweater before looking back up at him.
“This has nothing to do with social status.” Her voice trembled.
“Or a damsel in distress falling for her rescuer. Admit you’re scared.
Isn’t that what you kept telling me to do?
Face the fear head-on. Deal with it and let it work for you. Isn’t that what you said?”
His eyes narrowed. “And what is it I’m supposed to be afraid of?”
“You’re afraid you’re going to let someone else into your heart, and they’ll leave you.
You’re afraid you’re going to love someone again and lose them.
You’re scared, Cole. You know we could have a really great thing.
A lasting, maybe forever thing, but you’re afraid.
And you can’t move forward until you face it. With me or anybody else.”
“Riley … I don’t know what to say. What to tell you to make this better for you.”
“Then I guess goodbye is all that’s left.”
He stood there and stared at her. His jaw flexed, his eyes traced her face. Would he change his mind? Jump in and trust God to grow them together?
She held her breath. But he shook his head and turned away.
“Goodbye, Riley.”