6. Allegra
6
Allegra
T here isn’t much that shocks me. I’ve seen far too much in my life for things to knock me off balance. Today, however, I am shocked—and angry. I’ve given everything to Lorenzo—all my trust and loyalty—and yet he hasn’t afforded me the same courtesy. Keeping such information from me, after I’ve shared everything with him, is a betrayal in my eyes; one I never thought possible from him.
I sat there as he tried to explain away his reasons for keeping me in the dark, but none of them suffice. I’ve stolen and taken beatings. I’ve killed for him. I’ve done it all because he is the closest thing I have to a father. But he isn’t my father, he’s Bonnie Moorside’s.
He knows I’m angry. But that didn’t stop him from asking a favour of me; a favour I had zero inclination to take on. But then he looked at me in that proud parent way and I wilted. Lorenzo is my only family, and even though I am furious, I can’t deny him his request. It’s why I am here, outside Kelley’s room, readying myself to go in and talk with Bonnie.
It doesn’t go to plan though because of course she’s plotting to run away and of course we exchange heated words. There is something about the wool-clad woman that both infuriates and excites me. She looks so weak, but her streak of fire is never far from igniting. I can see the fear in her eyes, even though she’s too proud to let it show elsewhere. Well, I see her fear, and that is what I’ll use to keep her in line.
Lorenzo asked me to look after her. Keep her safe. Try to teach her to defend herself. It’s a laughable task because we both know Bonnie wants nothing to do with me or him. As she shouted at me seconds ago, she just wants to go home.
I wonder if she realises I’d love to go home, too. Back to Sicily, where none of this exists. I want to be in the villa looking out over our vineyard, taking care of important business, not babysitting a woman who is going to do everything in her power to make my life hell.
I’ve told Bonnie to accept and adjust. That’s advice I need to take myself, because I know I won’t go against Lorenzo’s wishes. I’ll do my job even though it will be taxing, and frankly, below me. I guess the Don’s plan to step back and retire is also on hold. I can’t watch his daughter twenty-four seven and run the business. It’s a clusterfuck all around, in my opinion. One giant step back for me and him.
A part of me wishes I’d argued with him instead of sitting there silently. I should have told him to look after the damn woman himself. It’s what he deserves. His actions have turned our world upside down—ripped the curtain back on a truth Bonnie clearly didn’t want to know. Me either, for that matter.
She stands with hands on hips, glaring at me. “What about my dads?”
“What about them?” I keep my tone level, hoping to seem unaffected by her. I’m pissed at myself that her existence even registers on my radar, let alone irks me.
“They’re in danger too. We need to get them…bring them here!”
“Not my problem.” God, I wish that were true. But I can see what’s about to transpire. Bonnie will throw a fit and the Don will cower to her. Bonnie makes him weak. I can see it in his eyes. He wants to be the father she never knew; the father he craved to be. Now I know why he took me under his wing. I was a cheap replacement for the daughter he had to give away.
“How can you be so cold?” she replies incredulously. “What if this were your family?”
I want to sneer at her and tell her my family is gone, but I have some shred of self-control left. She doesn’t deserve my life story.
“I’ll talk to Don Ferrante.” It’s the only thing I can think of saying. I purposely call him by his title. To call him Lorenzo in front of her feels too intimate. It’s a part of our lives she doesn’t deserve. Bonnie might be his bastard child, but she’s a stranger not worthy of our respect or loyalty. That’s earned through sweat and blood. Bonnie has shed neither for this family.
“Thank you,” she says with a little less venom.
“Don’t thank me. I couldn’t care less what happens to you or your family. I do what the Don asks. Nothing more. You are not in charge here, Ms Moorside. Remember that.”
I internally wince at the lie. I don’t want to give a shit about her. I want to mean what I said about being happy to leave her to fend for herself or being more than willing to kill her, but I don’t, and it makes me even angrier at the entire situation.
I place my gun back in its holster. Bonnie is staring at me strangely and I hate that it makes me self-conscious. Casting a quick glance at my chest, I make sure there isn’t a button open or a stain on my shirt. I see nothing. Flicking my eyes up, I see what she was looking at. Interesting. It seems Ms Moorside is a fan of my cleavage. The smirk is instantaneous, and she knows I’ve caught her looking.
“You need to follow me,” I say as she darts her eyes about the room, her cheeks reddening.
“Where? Why?”
“I’m to show you to your room, Ms Moorside.” Like a fucking lapdog . “It’s late and you need rest.”
“I want to stay here with Kelley,” she shoots back. I sigh internally, because of course, she has to argue. Stepping forward, I have her over my shoulder before she registers my movements. It doesn’t take her long to start screaming and beating my back with her fists, demanding I put her down.
Glaring at Kelley, warning her not to do anything stupid, I swivel around and march out of the room with an apoplectic Bonnie. I’m tired and want to relax before sleeping. My mental fortitude is waning and I cannot deal with her dramatic shit right now. We’d still be arguing in Kelley’s room if I hadn’t taken action.
Bonnie might be small, but she’s no pushover. I have to considerably tighten my grip to keep her in place as I ascend the stairs to the second floor. Kicking the door open, I dump her off my shoulder and onto her bed. “Your room. Good night.”
I want to laugh as I watch her scrambling to get to her feet. “You can’t just manhandle me,” she screams.
I’m in front of her in a second with my hand wrapped around her throat. “I can do as I please. This is my family, my house, and my rules.”
She narrows her eyes in defiance. “Is it your house? Your rules?”
Gritting my teeth, I lean even closer. My lips are millimetres away from hers. “Yes, it is. Don’t be fooled. I am the head of this family.”
Her retort is instantaneous and cold. “No, Allegra, you’re a replacement.”
The wind is knocked from my chest. I’ve underestimated her. She has a cruel streak, just like her father. I’m a little proud, to be honest. She isn’t cowering. In fact, I think she’s even surprising herself if her wide eyes are anything to go by. She’s not used to delivering such cutting words.
“The door will be locked,” I grit out. Shoving away from her, I stalk out of the room, filled with emotions I have no business feeling. Why is my usual composure failing around her? I’ve dealt with the worst of human society and none of their remarks have ever hit their targets. I don’t care enough about them to let their words affect me. But Bonnie’s have. They’ve hit a painful bullseye.
Deep down, I know why. As cold and ruthless as I am—as I want the outside world to believe—I crave what can never truly be mine. Lorenzo took me in and treated me like his own, but the hard truth is I’m not, and I never will be. However, I have worked my ass off to get where I am today, and no one is going to take that away from me. Being a replacement is enough. I can live with that. There is no other choice.
My room is opposite Bonnie’s. I wish now I’d locked her in elsewhere. How can I relax when she is so close? She makes me want to storm back in and scream at her. This waif of a woman has well and truly gotten under my skin.
“You look like you want to murder someone,” Rosa says, rounding the corner, heading to her own chamber.
She is the answer to my prayers. I need to distract myself from the past few minutes, and what better way than sex? Rosa and I have not fucked in a while, but I think it’s time to break the seal once more. We both know it will be nothing more than a release.
“My bed,” I growl. Her pupils dilate and she licks her lips. She takes a final step towards me and claims my mouth roughly. Lust takes over, and instead of dragging her into my room, I spin her and slam her against Bonnie’s door.
“Fuck me, Allegra,” Rosa gasps.
Dropping to my knees, I rip her pants down until they pool at her feet. Rosa’s hands grasp at the door, looking for something to hold on to. I waste no time plunging my tongue into her wet folds. She’s ready for me, and I need this. Maybe it’s my sadistic side that wants Bonnie to listen to me fucking another woman against the door that holds her captive. Or maybe it’s my way of demonstrating the power I have; the power she just stripped from me with a few callous words.
Whatever my reasoning, Rosa is panting and slamming her hand rhythmically against the door as I take her closer to the edge. As she chants louder, I can’t help but wonder what Bonnie is doing. Is she listening? Touching herself or curled up on the bed, plugging her ears? My gut says the former, however. She’ll hate herself for feeling turned on. I saw it in her eyes when she stared at my tits. Here is my opportunistic revenge. She made me feel out of control, so now I’m returning the favour.
“Fuck, Allegra. That was something else.” Rosa slumps against the door, her face red and her breathing laboured. “Please tell me I get a turn.”
“Go to my room,” I say, my voice slightly breathless. Rosa will think it’s because I’m turned on and in need. But the truth is, I lost myself to thoughts of Bonnie Moorside.
Rosa practically skips to my room, and I know I’ll follow, but I need a moment. I’m still facing Bonnie’s locked door and an irrational need to see her almost knocks me back to my knees.
Is she standing on the other side, straining to hear what’s happening? Am I losing my fucking mind? A growl escapes my throat in sheer exasperation. What the fuck am I doing, getting all bent out of shape over a bookstore manager? A woman who could ruin the life I’ve so carefully curated.
Tearing myself away, I cast all thoughts of her to the back of my mind. It’s the shock of learning who she is. That’s the only rational explanation for feeling and behaving this way. I just need to recentre myself and concentrate on what matters. Yes, I’ll make sure she comes to no harm, but that’s it. She can stay locked away with her friend while I reestablish my position. Lorenzo and I are going to have another talk, and this time, he will do the listening.
I am Allegra Malgeri, for fuck’s sake. Maybe it’s time to remind my beloved Don of that. He knows what I’m capable of. He knows what I have done and sacrificed for him and this family. There is no Ferrante legacy without me at the helm.