Chapter 25
Chapter Twenty-Five
Lexie
The waterpark is even more amazing than I could have dreamed.
With different themed areas from a pirate ship to a section full of mermaid sculptures to a sprinkler pad with a giant whale that shoots water out of his head, the whole park is any Little girl’s fantasy come to life.
Some of the slides are way too tall, though, and only Nelly and Juju are brave enough to go up that high, and I’m pretty sure Juju only does it to prove she’s not scared.
I saw the look on her face before Nelly dragged her up the stairs on the super big slide, and I was almost certain she was about to back down.
Flopping down on the surprisingly sturdy chair next to my Mommy, I pant for breath as my heart tries to beat its way out of my chest.
“Here, little one. Drink your water.”
I wrinkle my nose at the plain liquid in the bottle she tries to hand me. “Can’t I have a soda or something instead?”
It’s a fruitless argument, as I learned early on in my time here on the island. Mommy does not care for soda at all, and no matter how much I whine or plead she never relents.
And judging by the way her brow raises now, she’s no closer to giving in than before. “Water now, and if you don’t whine about it, I’ll let you have some apple juice with lunch.”
“But water is so gross.” I am indeed whining, and I mentally kick myself for it.
For two weeks now, I have been the most perfect, well-behaved Little girl to ever exist. I haven’t argued or whined or broken any rules at all, and it’s all starting to wear on me.
Being perfect honestly kind of sucks.
But I know I have to keep it up. Because if I can’t be as Little as the others, at least I can be better in other ways. Sweeter, kinder, more well behaved.
Maybe then Mommy will always look at me the way she did in the dressing room when she told me she loved me for the first time. And maybe then she actually will love me best, no matter how cute and tiny Tori and the others are.
“Maybe if you go ask Uncle Donovan really nicely, he’ll share some of those flavor packets he uses for Millie’s water.”
Crossing my arms, I huff out a breath and slide lower in my chair, unable to fight the urge to sulk despite my determination to be The Best Little Girl Ever. “I don’t want flavor packets, I want soda.”
“Do you want a spanking on your wet bottom? Because that’s what you’re going to get if you don’t stop with this attitude.”
Her tone is sharper than usual, or maybe it just seems that way because I’m feeling more Little than normal. Either way, the rebuke has tears stinging my eyes. Two weeks of being so good and I’m about to ruin everything for some soda.
“No, Mommy. I don’t wanna spankin’,” I whisper, my voice thick with unshed tears.
“Then I suggest you drink your water. Now, Alexis Paige.”
Taking the bottle from her hand, I bring the rubber nipple to my lips and suck. The water is surprisingly cold and before long, I’ve drained the bottle despite my protests.
“Good girl,” Mommy praises, her tone softening as she tucks the empty bottle back into the cooler. “Thank you for listening, baby. Why don’t you rest a bit and then we can head back over to the mermaids after lunch?”
“Oh, I wanna go see the mermaids again!” Tori seems to appear out of nowhere, bouncing excitedly on her toes. “Can I come with you, Auntie Cat, pretty please?”
Before I can tell her no, absolutely not, because this is my time with my Mommy, I’m cut off by Mommy’s low laughter. “As long as it’s all right with your Daddy, little one.”
“Yay! Daddy, can I go see the mermaids with Auntie Cat? Please, please, please?”
Uncle Max looks up from the phone he’s been frowning at. “Actually, that would be great if you don’t mind, Cat. I’ve got a bit of a work emergency, so I may need to pop home for a bit.”
“Not a problem at all.” Mommy waves a hand and my heart sinks into my stomach. “I’m more than capable of watching two sweet girls for a bit. Tori, why don’t you go see if the other girls want to come with us or if Nelly is going to talk Juju into going back to the slides.”
Part of me is tempted to tell Mommy I want to go on the slides with Nelly and Juju, just to spite Tori.
But in the end, I’m still too scared to risk it.
Millie, surprisingly, asks to go with them despite Uncle Donovan’s clear reservations.
Unsurprisingly, however, Izzy chooses to stay with the whale.
She much prefers the calmness of the sprinkler pad, and so does Uncle Gideon from what I can tell.
So it’s just me and Tori and my Mommy with the mermaids. I try to tell myself it’s fine, that today is meant to be a family day so it’s good that Mommy is getting to spend time with Tori and the others.
But it doesn’t work. Every time Mommy turns her attention to Tori for even a second, that monster inside my chest comes alive again, clawing and scratching to get out. I’ve spent so much time trying to show my Mommy that I can be her perfect Little girl and she still prefers Tori.
No, she doesn’t. She loves you. Her spending time with Tori doesn’t mean she loves her more.
Right. She’s my Mommy, not Tori’s. She loves me, she told me so.
But no matter how hard I try to tell the monster to calm down, the clawing sensation just gets worse.
With every laugh from my Mommy’s lips, with every word of praise, with every sneaky little hug she gives Tori as the other Little runs by, it feels like the monster in my chest might actually smother me.
Until the moment it finally breaks free.
Mommy packed plenty of toys for me to play with at the park, including a whole set of mermaids with different colored tails that swim under the water all on their own. I set the first one free, giggling as she dives toward the bottom of the pool and I reach for the second one in the set.
“Oh, those are so cool! Can I play with one?”
The jealousy monster rears its ugly head and I clutch the mermaids to my chest as I glare up at Tori. “These are mine. Mommy bought them for me.”
Guilt pricks at my chest when Tori’s face falls. Crap. I may not be super happy about her tagging along, but I don’t really want to hurt her feelings.
Before I can say anything to make it better, though, Mommy steps in, her hands on her hips as she glares down at me from the side of the pool.
“Alexis Paige! That was very rude. If you can’t share your toys then you will get out of that water and you can spend the rest of the day sitting on a chair with no toys at all. Apologize to Tori right now.”
I should. I know I should, and I was all set to do just that before Mommy told me I had to. Now, though, it feels like she’s taking Tori’s side, and the jealous monster in my chest is clawing at me until I can’t breathe.
“No. I don’t wanna share!”
Even with the oversized sunglasses she’s wearing, I can see the surprise on Mommy’s face. “Then you can go sit quietly while Tori and I play, instead.”
“Mommy, no, that’s not fair!” Regret, guilt, anger, and too many other emotions for me to name are battling inside my chest.
“Those are your options, little girl. Share your toys or go sit quietly.”
It’s not fair. After all the work I’ve put into being so good, all it takes is one little slip-up for Mommy to prove she still likes Tori better than me.
“Fine,” I grumble, blinking back tears. “I’ll share my stupid toys.” Picking up one of the mermaids, I launch it at Tori.
And watch as it hits her square in the face.
Stunned, Tori stumbles backward, and it’s like I’m watching in slow motion as she falls hard on her butt, her hands hitting the ground before her.
There’s a split-second of shocked silence before Tori’s wails pierce the air.
“Oh my god! Tori! Come here, sweetheart, it’s okay.
” Turning her back on me completely, Mommy bends and scoops Tori up, bouncing her on her hip while she tries to quiet her tears and even through my shock, I can feel the knives of betrayal slashing at my heart.
“Shhh, honey, it’s okay. Auntie Cat’s got you. Where does it hurt?”
“M-my b-butt and m-my hands,” Tori wails, holding up her scraped palms for my Mommy’s inspection.
“You poor thing. Let’s go get Uncle Donovan to take a look.” Pinning me with a fierce look I can feel even with her eyes shaded, Mommy calls for me, her voice iced over with anger. “Out of the pool, Alexis Paige. We are going to take Tori to see Uncle Donovan and then we are going home.”
I don’t want to go home. I want to stay and play with my friends. And I especially don’t want to go anywhere with Mommy when she’s so angry.
But I also know that trying to put it off will only make her more upset, so I gather my other mermaids and hurry out of the pool, trailing behind Mommy as she carries a sobbing Tori back to the slides where Uncle Donovan is standing, watching like a hawk for Millie to appear.
“Donovan.” Relief fills Mommy’s tone, and the prickles of guilt in my chest become stabbing swords. “Tori had an accident and she fell and hurt her hands. I’m a bit worried she might have sprained her wrist or something.”
Turning toward us, Uncle Donovan frowns and reaches for Tori’s right hand. “What happened?”
“I tr-tripped,” Tori manages through her tears, and now it feels like I might actually die from the guilt. She could have ratted me out to Uncle Donovan, but she didn’t and deep in my heart I know I don’t deserve that kindness.
Just one more way she’s better than me, I guess.
“Let me see your other wrist, sweetheart.” Dreadful Doctor D has disappeared, replaced by our sweet Uncle Donovan as he cradles her hands in his much larger ones.
“They are a bit swollen. Let’s get some ice on them and then I’ll take another look.
But either way, I think your waterpark day is done, Victoria. ”
“Can you take her?” Mommy asks, her voice tight with anger again. “I need to get Alexis home.”
“Of course.” Hooking his hands under Tori’s arms, Uncle Donovan props her on his hip. “I’ll look after her until Maxwell returns. You go take care of your Little one.”
“Thank you, Donovan. I’ll grab a bottle of milk for her before I go.” Running her hand over Tori’s dark hair, Mommy smiles. “Would some of Auntie Cat’s milk help you feel better, my sweet girl?”
Tori is no longer sobbing, but the tears are still streaming down her face as she drops her head onto Uncle Donovan’s shoulder and nods miserably.
For my part, I can only stare, a cold numbness creeping through my body as I watch my Mommy gather up our things, pulling a bottle of milk from our cooler and passing it off to Uncle Donovan.
Not just any bottle of milk. A bottle of Mommy’s milk. My milk.
And as I watch Tori lift the bottle to her lips, my Mommy’s milk pouring into her mouth, my heart shatters into a billion tiny pieces.