Chapter Eighteen
__________
Jason
The snowflakes, fat and lazy, are adding to the blanket of white we woke up to this morning, making today’s playdate perfect for all the littles.
I lean against the back porch banister, a mug of coffee cradled in my gloved hands.
Ben and Caleb, the pint-sized whirlwinds, are already lying supine in the snow mid-angel.
"Daddy! Look!" Caleb shrieks, his voice a joyous squeak that cuts through the magic of the snowfall. He scrambles to his feet, leaving behind a slightly lopsided outline of his small frame.
“It almost looks as angelic as you, Peanut,” Barrett calls back from beside me as Caleb brushes the snow from his pants and coat before helping Ben to his feet.
“Yours, too,” Caleb tells Ben in his little voice. “It perfect.” Caleb helps brush the snow from Ben’s coat before pulling him into a hug, whispering something in his ear that makes him giggle.
Their innocence is heartwarming, and my insides melt as I watch the two of them, who are nearly the same height.
“How’s everything going?” Barrett asks, nudging my shoulder.
“It’s going well. Just glad Valentine’s Day is over so my students aren’t so hyped up on sugar this week,” I let out a laugh, but there is a lot of truth in that statement.
Halloween and Valentine’s are the two holidays when the kids are hyper.
They are at Christmas time too, but for a whole different reason.
“How’s Ben settling in at the shop? Is Caleb getting the help he needs? ”
“Ben is a lifesaver. Caleb already loves Ben like a brother. I have a feeling those two are going to become besties before we even know what hit us. They get along great, and the way they encourage each other at work is great to see. There is zero competition between them, with each one bringing their own strengths to the workroom.”
“That’s great,” I tell him, taking a sip from my steaming mug, and he does the same.
A loud raucous across the lawn draws our attention. “Oh, boy,” Barrett says, already setting his mug down and taking the stairs down off the wooden deck.
I set my mug down and follow.
Noah and Carlos, a dynamic duo whose energy output can power a small village, are attempting to build a snow fort, complete with…weapons made of ice? What the hell?
As I approach, I hear Marcus, Noah’s Daddy, talking to him. “You can’t have weapons around the littles. They don’t play rough like you two. You need to be careful, or we will be saying goodbye before the day even starts.”
“Carlos, you know better, too. This isn’t our home. You need to be respectful, or we’ll be leaving too.” Jasper adds.
Jasper is the owner of Club Pierre, and we all met through him in one way or another.
He came in from the city for our little event.
It’s been a while since we’ve seen him and Carlos.
Noah is extra excited to have his friend back.
They were roommates and best friends for a while until Carlos moved in with Jasper in Bedford City.
They’re both middles and a little on the mischievous side.
“It’s not to attack the littles, Daddy,” Noah tells Marcus.
“Yeah, it’s to protect them from the dragons,” Carlos adds.
Both Marcus and Jasper give us a knowing look, indicating they’ll keep an eye on the two boys to ensure they play safely.
Behind us, we hear Kai sing, “I heeeere.”
“Yay!” Caleb and Ben call out in unison.
When I turn to look up at the deck where Shawn and Kai are standing, Kai is sparkling as bright as the snow. His tiara and sequined tutu are fit for a snow queen. He instantly runs down to the yard to join the other littles, holding hands, jumping in circles, and giggling.
“Sorry, we’re late,” Shawn tells us. “I had a late night with a delivery, and Kai was kind enough to let me sleep in.” He tells us.
“I was not shocked to find that he already laid out his clothes for me to help him get dressed when I woke up.” He lets out an amused laugh just as a snowball hits me in the chest.
“Attack the dragon daddies,” a voice calls out, and before we can respond, two more snowballs fly our way. Only one makes contact against Shawn’s shoulder.
“Noah,” Marcus warns from across the yard.
“Sorry, Uncle Shawn,” Noah says, looking a bit sheepish, but his tone says he’s not sorry in the slightest.
“No worries, buddy. Just be careful.” Shawn has a fondness for all the littles and middles of our group.
“Let’s make snow soldiers!” Carlos calls out, and Noah is totally on board with his fist bump.
“Snow soldiers?” I ask my group of friends, and they just shrug.
Marcus and Jasper join us by the stairs in the yard. “It’s the boy version of a snow angel…I think,” Marcus says.
After a few minutes of watching them make poses like soldiers in the snow, instead of wings. I let out a gasp when I see Carlos pull his pants down just enough to imprint his dick in the snow.”
"Carlos, you're going to get frostbite on your light saber," Jasper says, rolling his eyes while Noah loses his mind with laughter, falling to the ground in a fit of hysterics.
"I have to admit, calling his penis a light saber is a surprisingly effective distraction from Noah feeling like he needs to do the same," Marcus says with his hand on Jasper’s shoulder.
I don’t know how Marcus and Jasper have the energy for those two.
While the energy in the yard starts to simmer down from play time, it’s then that I notice something shift in the atmosphere. The snow that was falling gently in large flakes moments ago is now swirling in white. Their movements are deliberate.
Kai, dancing in the wind, giggles out, "Whoa! It’s tickling me!"
“Me, too,” Ben says, opening his mouth, trying to taste them.
"It's getting colder," Caleb whines, his voice a high-pitched siren song of impending hypothermia. He runs up to Barrett and clutches his jacket to try to steal his warmth.
"I think my toes are turning into icicles," declared Ben, his eyes wide with theatrical drama. He wiggles his foot in my direction to demonstrate, as if that would provide evidence of needing warmth.
My own toes, I have to admit, are engaged in a silent protest against the cold. I’d layered us both up this morning like I was preparing for a polar bear wrestling match, but the chill seems to have found a way in.
“Alright, alright,” Barrett announces, clapping his hands together with more gusto than I felt. “Operation: Get Warm is officially a go!” He points to the back door of the house.
A chorus of cheers erupts from everyone.
Inside, I lead the little brigade towards the hallway bathroom to wash their hands while Marcus tends to the fireplace. It’s a newer system, and he only needs to flip the switch to ignite the flames.
Shawn declares that he’ll set up the mountain of blankets and cushions around the television. There is a basket of toys in the corner, filled with stuffed animals, coloring books, and cars, for anyone who wants to play while getting warm.
Leading my crew back into the living room, they all settle around on the floor cushions and blankets.
Kai goes over to a duffel bag in the corner and pulls out an Elsa doll before joining the rest of the group.
I notice Ben looking at it with wonder, but he doesn’t say anything.
His cheeks turn red, and I am sure it’s not from the cold we escaped. Does my sweet boy want a doll?
So much to still learn about my sweet boy.
“Can we have a movie, Daddy?” Caleb asks shyfully.
“Yes! One with singing.” Ben adds.
“And magic!” Noah puts in his two cents' worth, his eyes gleaming with the feverish anticipation that only a healthy dose of Disney can induce. He’s hugging a yellow dog stuffie that is wearing pajamas.
He doesn’t go anywhere without it when he’s in middle-mode.
Part of me wonders if Noah leans more to being a little than a middle.
“Maybe a dragon? Or beast?” Carlos hints.
I chuckle. “A beast, huh? Well, I think I might know just the movie where you all can have singing, magic, and beasts.” I wink at Barrett, who is already scrolling through his streaming service until landing on Beauty and the Beast.
“This very living room, on days like today, has been known to have a little magic. Especially if you’re all really good, it will make pizza appear,” Jasper calls out.
Carlos pops his head out of the blanket. “Extra pepperoni?”
“Have we met?” Jasper winks.
“Of course. You’re my daddy.” He giggles before hiding back under the warmth of his blanket.
“Pizza has been ordered. You guys enjoy the movie, and we’ll let you know when it’s here,” Barrett says, as the daddies head into the kitchen, leaving the littles and middles to enjoy the show.
“Did you see that?” Carlos’ non-whisper has all of us laughing as he points to the prince turning into the beast.
“See what?” I feign ignorance, though my heart was doing a little jig of amusement from being around my group of friends.
“The… the magic!” Noah exclaims, his face radiating pure joy.
When I look over, I see Ben’s small smile, and I offer him a wink. He blows me a kiss, and I catch it before holding it to my heart. He looks back at the television with a dreamy look that probably has nothing to do with the movie.
They all stare, eyes glued to the screen. I bet they all have this movie memorized, but it’s a joy watching them in their element.
Caleb doesn’t like anything scary, and he seems to have scooted closer to Ben. He’s holding on to his beloved stuffie he got on a date with Barrett from years ago. I think that animal has more clothes than he does right now.
The world outside continues its winter assault, but inside, we are a pocket of warmth, wonder, and anticipation. A place where a talking teapot is not just a fantasy, but a possibility waiting to be embraced.
The groaning in unison takes all the daddies by surprise, and they laugh when Jasper pauses the movie just as the beast invites Belle to a dance.
“Pizza’s here,” Jasper calls out, and everyone files into the kitchen. It’s not a large space, but it’s big enough to house all of us. Most of us stand around the island while the littles take seats at the table.
“The pizza is from that new place in town, Slice,” Jasper tells us, and we all look at the unmarked boxes.
“We’ve been wanting to try it,” Marcus tells him.
“Pizza Extravaganza!” Carlos exclaims, and the group is beyond excited as I hear at least two stomachs rumble in waiting.
And, Jasper is right. When he opens the box, the pizzas look just as good as they smell. We each dish up plates for our perspective littles and middles.
Things are running smoothly, and the sounds of conversation flow until Noah’s ensuing meltdown.
Carlos, bless his innocent, pizza-loving soul, has been dealt a slightly…
more generous slice. And by generous, I mean it probably has two extra pepperonis.
Noah, whose slice is perfectly adequate, suddenly declares righteous indignation.
“THAT’S NOT FAIR!” he shrieks, his voice suddenly an octave higher than a hummingbird’s mating call. He points a trembling finger, which, incidentally, has a smear of marinara sauce on the side, at Carlos’s pizza. “Carlos’s slice is HUGE! Mine is TINY! This is Slice Injustice.”
“Noah,” Marcus begins, voice a practiced blend of calm and the undertow of a rising tidal wave of parental exhaustion. “They’re both delicious. And they’re both the same amount of pizza, just… shaped differently. Like clouds. One could be a dragon, the other a fluffy sheep.”
Using the boys’ dragon-slaying snow fort from earlier as a metaphor is clever.
“BUT THE DRAGON HAS MORE PIZZA!” he bellows, stomping his foot with such force that I briefly considered checking the news for an earthquake. He then proceeds to flail, practically vibrating off his chair. Face red.
“Alright, Noah,” Marcus says, tone shifting. The playful, whimsical persona is tucked away. “I think we need to have a little talk. And that talk might involve a brief, but impactful, journey down the hall.”
Noah takes on a panicked demeanor, and his eyes widen at the word ‘impactful.’ Noah likes to push boundaries and enjoys spankings to get refocused and grounded.
“But… but it’s not fair!” he wailed with a smirk. Yep, he knows what’s coming.
“Life isn’t always fair, Noah,” Marcus replies. “Sometimes, the universe deals you a slightly smaller slice of pizza.”
“But Daddy,” Noah sniffles, his voice now a pathetic whimper, a far cry from the brave dragon slayer from moments ago. “Can I have your slice when we’re done?”
When Noah disappears down the hall, I hear Caleb whisper, “Somebody's gonna get spanked.”
Barrett clears his throat. “Caleb, do you need a punishment? That’s not nice to talk about your friend that way.”
Caleb shakes his head profusely.
“Eat your lunch so you can go back to the movie.”
A few minutes later, Noah comes back, rubbing his butt with a dazed look on his face. He doesn’t sit at the table. Instead, he leans against Marcus’ chest, and Marcus wraps his arms around him to make sure Noah feels safe and loved.
The hushed hum of the television, a symphony of Disney melodies, washes over the remnants of the eventful shared meal. Ben, his small frame sated and warm beside me, begins to succumb to the inevitable pull of slumber.
“Is it time for sleepies, my flower?” I murmur, my voice barely a whisper.
Ben offers a soft nod and an unarticulated sigh, a testament to the profound peace settling within him. I pull him onto my lap, and he rests his head on my chest. He burrows into me, and I reach for the plush blanket he was using. The weight was a comforting anchor against my swirling thoughts.
Sometimes I wonder if we truly appreciate these moments. The stillness, the quiet, the simple act of being together, undisturbed by the clamor of the world.
Ben shifts in my lap, his breathing deepening. For just a moment, here with me, he’s a vessel of innocence, unburdened by all that he has experienced.
My gaze fixes on the flickering images on the screen, on the animated figures dancing through their whimsical narratives.
My hand gently strokes Ben’s hair, each strand a filament of pure, untainted life.
They sing of dreams. Of wishes granted, of happily ever after.
And in these moments, I can almost believe it.
I can almost believe that such simple, pure desires can manifest.
Ben stirs, his lips parting slightly. “Daddy?” he mumbles, his voice thick with sleep.
“Yes, my sweet flower,” I whisper, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. “Daddy’s here.” I squeeze him a little tighter as his body relaxes into mine.
And it feels… it feels like everything is exactly as it should be. Not just for tonight, but for this moment, this tangible, breath-filled moment.
I close my eyes, feeling the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest against mine. The Disney music seems to whisper secrets only the heart can understand. Secrets of connection, of belonging, and of love.