Chapter Nineteen
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Ben
Every time I’m in Jason’s house, my olfactory senses are in overdrive. Tonight, the scent of roasted garlic and herbs is already a warm hug, even before Jason pulls the chicken from the oven.
I lean against the kitchen counter, sipping my bottle of water, a contented sigh escaping me. "You know," I start, a goofy grin spreading across my face, "I think I'm officially addicted to your cooking."
Jason, ever the calm presence, chuckles, carefully transferring the golden-brown bird to a carving board. "Addicted is a strong word, Ben. Maybe just...enthusiastically appreciative."
"No, no, addicted is right," I insist, pushing off the counter and moving closer. "And it’s all your fault. This is the third incredible meal this week, and don't even get me started on the cookies you baked last night. My pants are starting to feel… a little snug."
He shoots me a playful look. "Are you talking about needing to loosen a button, or do you need to buy pants with an elastic waistband?"
I giggle and slap his biceps gently. "Definitely leaning towards elastic. Or maybe maternity.” I let out a genuine laugh before setting my drink down and wrapping my arms around him. “I wouldn't trade it for the world. Not one bite."
I kiss him between his shoulder blades before stepping back when Jason starts to carve the bird, the aroma intensifying, and I watch his hands, so steady and sure.
It feels like a lifetime ago that we were navigating our awkward first date.
Now, when I come over, it feels like coming home. It scares me how fast it happened.
Jason paused, a smile playing on his lips. "Is there anything you would change?”
"Maybe our first game night,” I tease.
“Oh, come on. It wasn’t that bad,” he says, setting the knife down and chuckling, turning to me.
“Really? I add, my eyes twinkling. "That Monopoly game nearly ended in a diplomatic incident."
"Hey, you know I still maintain that your real estate acquisition was borderline cheating," he counters good-naturedly.
"Seriously, though, this thing between us has been…easy. And good."
Jason serves up the chicken on two plates, along with seasoned green beans, and carries them over to the table that I already set. "Easy is good, Ben. Easy means we’re comfortable. We’re ourselves."
"It’s more than just easy, though," I say, taking a bite.
The flavor exploded in my mouth. Seriously, how is he not a chef?
"It's like… we've hit this beautiful stride. The movie marathons on the couch, the weekend excursions where you’ve been showing me around, that quirky little arcade downtown, even just sitting here, talking over a quiet dinner. It all just…fits."
"I feel it too. Even when a movie isn't quite what we expected." He looks at me over the rim of his iced tea.
"Ugh, that documentary on butterflies was truly terrible!" I exclaim, my fork hovering over another bite."
“It wasn’t my fault. You picked it.” He tells me, setting his glass down, meeting my gaze. His eyes are warm and filled with genuine affection.
Wiping my mouth on my napkin, I offer him a grin. “The trailer looked good. I didn’t realize half of them wouldn’t make it during migration. It was sad. Talk about a mood killer.”
We both laugh and finish our meal.
“This is pretty much my idea of a perfect future, Jason."
He reaches across the table, his fingers brushing mine. "Mine too, Ben. Mine too."
The rest of the meal is delicious, and the prospect of future elastic-waistband purchases is amusingly real. But it’s the warmth that I feel being with Jason that fills the room–genuine contentment and shared joy.
"Ben.” The serious tone Jason uses when he says my name makes a knot form in my stomach. “Can we talk?"
I try to make my voice sound as light as his. "Always happy to hear your brilliant insights.” I grin. “What’s on your mind?"
"It's about… well, it's about your living situation," he starts, gesturing vaguely toward the driveway where my vintage camper van is parked.
A semi-restored relic from the sixties. It may not be ideal, but its home.
"I know you love the freedom of it, the whole ‘living off the grid' vibe," he continues, clearly choosing his words carefully, "and I admire that spirit, truly. It’s adventurous!
But I worry. The more I get to know you and care about you, the more I worry about you. Is it…secure enough?"
I chuckle, a warm, rumbling sound. "Thank you for worrying about me. But, like I told Barrett, it’s no different from camping, really.
Just with better plumbing and a fridge that actually works.
" I tease. “But, seriously, Jason, this is exactly what I need right now. It’s more than independence. It’s about learning to stand on my own two feet.
It gives me the freedom to focus on saving money to start my own flower business if I want.
Not that I see myself leaving Peonies and Petals, but maybe adding to the business in some way.
It's a stepping stone, not a destination. "
Jason leans forward, resting my elbows on the table.
"I get that, Ben, I really do. But the daddy side of me wants to protect you. I don’t see the van as a safe haven.
But please let me know if you ever need anything.
I want to be here for you.” His eyes look a bit glassy, and I stand and walk over to him, sitting in his lap as usual, and let him hold me.
It’s more for him than me this time. “It’s hard not to care. ”
“Deal,” I whisper. “And hey, maybe you can come over for a glamping experience sometime. I’ve got a surprisingly comfortable bed and the best cuddles available in town."
What I hope Jason understands is that I am carving my own path. And while it might look a little unconventional from the outside, my camper holds endless possibilities.
The dim light of the iPad provides a comforting glow, a gentle counterpoint to the darkness outside my van’s curtains.
I am deep in the zone, my fingers flying across the screen, adjusting the font’s readability on the new version of the reading app Jason recommended. My reading has been improving, and I feel a surge of pride just like I did with Ms. Tibball.
Ten minutes into a story about a frog prince, I feel a shift in the van's atmosphere. The camper, usually a cozy haven, is starting to feel a bit… charged.
Suddenly, a distinct clunk breaks the quiet. It isn't loud, but it’s definitely present. My brow furrows. It sounds suspiciously like the heater giving up. As if on cue, a subtle chill begins to creep into the air.
"Oh, you've got to be kidding me," I mutter, running a hand through my hair. Jason had been so worried about the van's safety, and here we were. Still, dwelling on it wouldn't warm me up.
I grab my phone, my mind slipping a bit into littlespace because I really don’t want to have to deal with this. "Daddy," I begin when Jason answers the phone, my lip quivering. "It’s my van."
"Flower, what happened?" Jason's voice, a steady beacon of calm, comes through the receiver.
"My heater just went poo-poo,” I tell him with a bit of humor before I sniffle through the tears. “It’s cold.”
I can hear him shuffling around his house and hear the jingle of his keys.
Then, there’s a beat of silence. "Ben. I need you to put on your coat and wrap a blanket around yourself to stay warm.
Also, pack a bag with some clothes and whatever you need for a few days.
You're gonna stay with me until we can get the van fixed.”
“Okay, Daddy.” I don’t argue because I know this could cost everything I have been saving from the shop. Hopefully, that won’t be the case. But at least Jason will keep me safe and warm. “This will be like a long sleepover,” I tell him.
Jason chuckles. "You always find the bright side, don't you?”
“I try.”
“Alright, listen. I'm heading over now.”
A genuine smile spreads across my face. "You’re a lifesaver. Seriously. Can I bring my iPad, too? I was working on my reading, but I think it needs a break from the chilly air."
"Of course it can. Just get yourself ready.
I'll be there in about ten minutes. And hey, think of it as a mini-adventure. We’ll figure out the heater tomorrow.
No doubt there's a simple fix waiting to be discovered.
" His voice sounds hopeful. Thankfully, it's Friday night, and he doesn’t have school tomorrow.
"You're right," I say, already feeling the warmth of an anticipated hot bath and snuggling with Jason. "A little unexpected adventure. I love it. I'll be ready."
I hang up the phone, a lightness in my chest.