CHAPTER TEN #2
“They did it for Edward and Lufton, too.”
I spun to look at Livy. “They’re here?”
“That they are,” Declan said, eyeing the beer the dads were drinking.
“Don’t even think about it, son,” Hawthorne said, his eyes serious. He knew his son well.
Any conversations going on around me faded to the background. I scanned the area until my eyes landed on Edward. He was standing by one of the drink tables, talking to my dad.
But he was staring at me.
Our eyes locked, and I realized it was going to be impossible to pretend as if nothing had ever happened between us.
The chemistry, the attraction… the love…
it all came flooding back in one giant rush.
For me at least. We stood like that—like there was an invisible rope between the two of us, pulling us together—for a few moments.
Then I smiled and waved him over. I just couldn’t turn my back on him or shut him out. I didn’t have it in me.
He grinned, a relieved look flashing across his handsome face, said something to my dad, and hurried over to us.
I’d forgotten just how good-looking he was.
His shoulders and chest were broader than the last time I’d seen him, and I wondered if he’d spent a lot of time doing physical labor in the orchards.
He’d always liked doing that. The deep tan he already had seemed to indicate that he had.
His hair, which had been darker the last time I’d seen him, was lighter now, bleached by the sun.
There were other changes, too. He was dressed like a man, not like a college kid home from school for the summer.
He wore dress khakis, a nice polo, and an expensive watch. He looked like a businessman at a company picnic. Not a family friend.
“Hey,” he said, pulling me into a hug almost immediately.
I closed my eyes as his arms pulled me against his hard chest and he held me tight.
I inhaled him, the scent of him equaled summer to me, and I couldn’t get enough.
The pull that had always been in the background between us, came crashing back in.
I wanted to stay in his arms all night. I wanted to climb him and let him carry me everywhere.
And then his arms were gone.
I stepped back, shaky, almost losing my balance. I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear to hide my sudden awkwardness. “How are you?”
“Good.” His eyes scanned my face as if he was memorizing me.
“So dressed up. Man, what are you doing? Trying to show the rest of us up?” Declan had on a backwards baseball cap, well-worn shorts, a fraternity T-shirt, and flip-flops.
Edward smiled. “No, nothing like that. I came straight from work. That’s all.”
“Oh.” The smile fell from Declan’s face.
The mood was immediately somber as we all realized why he’d been at work. While the rest of us were free to party our way through college if we wanted to, Edward was in charge of the family business his dead father had left him unprepared to take over.
“Where’s your other half?” Livy asked, changing the subject.
Edward’s head snapped up. “What?” his tone was sharp, and his eyes darted to mine, almost guiltily.
“Lufton,” Livy said. “Where’s Lufton?”
“Oh, uh…” he turned, distracted, running his hand through his hair. “He’s over there with Willa and Siobhan.”
Was it just me, or was Edward acting a little strange? I looked at Livy and she raised her eyebrows slightly. She’d noticed it, too.
Declan frowned as he watched Willa and Lufton laughing and trying to hit each other with the corn hole bags. He had just started walking over there when the sound of a bell interrupted everything.
Edward leaned over and whispered in my ear. “Hey, later can we go somewhere and talk, just the two of us?”
His nearness, his eyes, his voice, it was all bringing my raw feelings to the surface. Forget talking. I just wanted to go somewhere private with him and attack him with kisses. I had to get myself under control. “Sure…”
“Dinner,” Orla called out, again ringing the old-style iron bell she’d had Hawthorne affix atop a thick, rugged wooden post sometime over the past year.
And then our chances of catching up were over—at least for a while.
We were pulled into the usual family activities.
Dinner was long and relaxing, and I felt better.
More like myself. We ate, talked, and laughed at the huge picnic tables in the grove.
As the sun went down, lights began to glow in all the trees, while lanterns lit the tables and the stars came out.
A few fireflies were flickering around us, and I felt more at peace than I would have thought possible.
I felt Edward’s eyes on me when Orla asked if I was seeing anyone special.
“No, not really.”
“I thought you were dating that one guy. You know, the one who was in law school?” Willa asked.
I shook my head. “No, things didn’t work out.”
“Oh, sorry,” she said, taking another bite of steak.
“No, I wasn’t upset,” I clarified, but she’d already turned back to Siobhan and my words tapered off, lost in the noise of everyone around me.
I cut my eyes over to Edward, who was sitting across from me.
He was watching me intently. I smiled, and he gave me a quick grin that didn’t quite reach those bright blue eyes of his.
Something flashed across his face that I couldn’t read.
Jealousy? Relief? Was he pleased I wasn’t dating anyone?
Or relieved that I’d moved on and tried to date? Did he even care at all?
God. This was driving me crazy.
The rest of the evening was swept up with laughing and talking, and before I knew it, the adults and younger kids had all moved on.
It was just Livy and me sitting around the table with Edward, Lufton, Declan, and Aidan.
Even Athena and Davenport had abandoned Aidan for the younger, more exuberant crowd.
The two animals were taking part in an impromptu game of hide and go seek, often giving away the location of one or more of the kids with excited snorts or bleats.
Lou’s screams of laughter could be heard over everything else, and I smiled at the familiar sound.
I’d missed coming home.
Declan had pilfered some beer from the adult drinks table while they were otherwise occupied hanging out by the pool, and things felt normal. It was almost as if the past year hadn’t happened.
Almost.
There was still an uneasiness between Edward and me, and it felt as if unsaid words were hanging heavily between us. I knew we needed to talk alone, but I was starting to wonder if that was going to happen.
Willa and Siobhan came over to join us. I knew both girls still felt torn between hanging out with us and the younger kids. I didn’t envy them being sixteen. It was such a tough age. I knew I was only three years older, but there was a mile of difference in maturity tucked away in those years.
Willa, always a rule follower, surprised me by reaching for a beer.
Declan saw what she was doing and grabbed it before she could do anything except get her hand around it.
“Absolutely not,” he said, frowning at her. “What the hell are you thinking, Wills?”
“Don’t call me that. I’m not the future King of England. And you’re only three years older than we are,” she gestured to Siobhan. “Why can’t we drink, too?”
Declan shook his head. “Nope. You both need to go hang with the little ones. This isn’t the place for you.”
Willa’s pretty green eyes filled with hurt. “You’re such an asshole. Y’all were drinking beer by the time you were our age.”
Declan softened his tone. “Yeah, but we’re older now, and… look, I’m uncomfortable with you two being out here with us drinking. Siobhan’s my little sister, and you’re… you. I don’t want to see y’all drinking. It’s not right.”
Willa instantly took offense. “Such a double standard.” She released her hand from around the bottle and let him take the beer from her. “Fine. Come on, Siobhan. We’ll go somewhere we’re actually wanted.” She flounced off.
Siobhan smiled, gave us a little wave, and hurried after Willa.
Declan watched them leave with a frown. “I don’t mean to be an asshole. I just think they’re too young…”
“They are,” Livy said, grabbing a beer. She was only eighteen, but she’d always been more mature than the rest of us.
Even though she was my younger sister, I’d always felt like she was the oldest sibling.
She just had that kind of air about her.
“Besides, they would hate it. They’d take one sip and spit it out.
Come on, let’s canoe out to the floating dock.
” She leaned over to help Declan and Aidan gather up drinks and gave me a quick wink.
I grinned at her. She was the best sister. She was giving Edward and me the chance to talk alone.
“I think I’m going to stay here,” I said, grabbing a couple of beers before Lufton could confiscate the rest.
“I will, too,” Edward said, grabbing a couple more.
The others took the hint and ran off together amidst raucous laughter as Lufton threw Livy over his shoulder and led the way.
I couldn’t help laughing a little as I watched them go. Then I turned back to Edward. I’d been waiting all night to get the chance to talk to him, but I was suddenly shy now that I had it.
And worried about what he was going to say.
“It’s been great to see you,” I said.
He smiled, but he looked kind of nervous. “You, too.” He took a deep breath, like he was about to launch into a discussion he’d been dreading.
I stopped him. “I don’t need a big, long explanation. I know this past year has been awful for you.”
“It has,” he agreed, taking a pull from his beer and watching me. “I need to tell you something…”
I held up a hand. “Don’t worry, I know you don’t want a girlfriend. I’m not going to hit on you or anything, I just wanted to talk, and maybe clear the air…”
“I’m in a relationship,” he blurted.
The air whooshed out of my lungs as if someone had hit me. “Oh.”
Dating. He was dating someone. It was like a knife slashed through my heart.