Chapter 45 Jude
FORTY-FIVE
JUDE
The moment I push all the way inside Charlotte, I know that she’s officially ruined me for anyone else. There will never be another woman in my life. There’s just Charlotte.
She lets out a loud moan as I pause, letting her feel all of me for a moment and get adjusted.
She asked for more, and I’m going to give it to her.
It took everything in me to take it slow and give her time to acclimate.
But now, with this little taste of her taking every inch of my cock, I know slow isn’t a possibility anymore.
I need fast. Hard. I want her to still feel me tomorrow and the day after that. I want to ruin her for anyone else the way she’s ruined me. It’s only fair. I want to fuck her so good that she’ll realize just how perfect we are together.
“Jude.” She moans my name loudly, her pussy hugging me tight.
I trap her mouth with mine, wanting to taste the next time she moans.
I intended the kiss to be gentle as I pick up pace with my hips, but she’s the one to deepen it.
She tilts her head to the side and meets my tongue with hers.
I kiss her back, putting the same intensity into the kiss that she is.
My glasses bump against her cheek and get in the way of me kissing her the way that I want to.
In one quick motion, I’m pulling them from my face and tossing them to the side.
Charlotte pulls away, her lips red and swollen as they turn into a smile. “What if I liked the glasses on? I think you’ve given me a glasses kink.”
I laugh, leaning in to kiss her again as I roughly rock my hips into her. We get lost in the kiss and the feeling of our bodies moving together before I pull away just enough to get words out. “I’m never wearing my contacts again, then.”
She wraps her legs around my back, her heels pushing into my ass as she gives me a satisfied smile. “Good.” Her new position allows me even deeper inside her the next time I rock my hips back and forth.
It feels too good. She fits too perfectly around me, and I know that I’m not going to last as long as I’d like to.
Everything with her is too fucking perfect.
The way she hungrily kisses me back, always eager for me.
The way her nails bite into my back as I push myself in and out of her.
The moans she lets out. The way she reaches inside my chest and grabs me by the heart without even realizing it.
This woman owns me in a way no one has—or ever will again.
It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell her how I feel, but I can’t.
I’m too nervous. I don’t know if this is just physical for her or if she sees any kind of future with me, and I don’t have the nerve to find out.
I don’t want to ruin things with her. I’ll hide my feelings and pretend they aren’t there if it means I have any part of her at all—even if it’s just the physical side.
“Jude.” She moans my name, and I kiss her before she’s able to do it again. As much as I love hearing her say my name desperately, if she says it again, I really will be coming before I’ve had the chance to make her finish before me.
The kiss is messy. We’re teeth and tongues and moans as I pick up the pace. I know my hips slam against her in a punishing rhythm, but she doesn’t seem to care. Instead, her moans get louder and more depraved. My girl likes to be fucked deep and hard, and it drives me fucking wild.
“God, you feel too fucking good,” I say, ripping my mouth from hers.
I kiss along her neck, creating a trail of red marks that joins the ones I left earlier.
I’ve never cared about leaving a hickey, but with her, I want them on every inch of her body.
I want to claim her in a way that is so raw and primal, and I can’t even pretend to feel any different.
Everything with Charlotte is different. I’ve never wanted—needed—someone the way that I do her. It’s both exhilarating and terrifying.
Charlotte moves one of her hands from my back to cup the back of my neck instead. Her fingers latch onto the hair at the base of my head as her nails bite into my skin. She holds me there, keeping our faces close as I continue to slam into her.
Her gaze locks with mine, and there’s something so intimate about the moment that I feel the base of my spine tingle with the threat of an orgasm.
I’ve never been inside someone without a barrier or craved the eye contact, but with her, I don’t want anything between us, and I don’t want to look away.
I want to see her reaction when she comes. I want her to watch me when I come. If I’m too nervous to use words to convey how gone I am for her, maybe my reaction will be enough.
“I’m close,” she pants, her heels digging more into my ass as she keeps me deep inside her.
“I can tell,” I grit out, letting out a shaky breath as I push myself as deep as I can. My hips hit the back of her thighs, making a slapping sound because of the sweat coating both our bodies.
“Come for me, baby,” I demand, needing to feel it. “Come around my cock.”
Her eyes shut as she shakes her head. “Not until you come. I want to come with you.”
Pleasure courses through my veins at her words. “I’m going to,” I say through gritted teeth as I continue to fuck her rough and hard. “I want you to come around my cock as I fill you with my cum.”
Charlotte squeezes her eyes shut even tighter at my words. Her cunt squeezes me, telling me she loves the idea of me feeling her with my cum.
“Is that what you want?” I grit, reaching between us and taking her nipple between my fingers to turn her on even more.
“Yes,” she pants, her back arching. I know she’s close with how tight she’s getting around me, which is good because I’m seconds away from my own orgasm.
“Good girl. Do it now for me, baby. Let me feel it.”
I pinch her nipple and dive in for a kiss, wanting our bodies to touch in every place physically possible. I swallow her loud cry of pleasure as she’s finally sent over the edge.
Her nails dig into the back of my neck as I taste her moans, my hips slamming against her a few more times before my own orgasm rips through me.
For a moment, my vision fades to black as I ride out the waves of pleasure.
Nothing’s ever compared to the overwhelming amount of pleasure taking over my entire body.
We’re a mix of moans and groans and curse words as we both get lost in the feeling of each other. Both orgasms seem to last forever as our tongues clash in the same passionate manner as our bodies.
Everything about it is fucking perfect. I can’t think straight. I can’t focus on anything other than the way it feels to finally experience this with her.
We both ride out the orgasm, my hips slowing with each moment that passes by until I go completely still with my cock still buried inside her.
I fall into her, pressing her body into the mattress as we both try to catch our breath. My face finds the crook of her neck as I try to come back to Earth after the mind-blowing orgasm I just had.
I love that she doesn’t move. In fact, her legs stay wrapped around me, and her fingers absentmindedly play with the hair at the back of my neck as we both regain our footing.
“That was…” she pants, her chest heaving underneath mine. Her room smells like sweat and sex, and it turns me on again, even though I just came.
“Everything,” I finish for her, lifting my head just enough to be able to look her in the eye.
She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth before giving me a smile.
“Yes. Everything.” Her gaze softens as she continues to play with my hair, and it’s at the tip of my tongue to tell her that I’ve fallen for her.
I’ll be anything she wants me to be, but I don’t want to just be her friend.
I want to be more; I’m just too fucking scared of being rejected by her to tell her that.
What if I confess how I feel and I lose her completely? I can’t do that. I need her. Ava needs her. So I force myself to keep the words to myself, no matter how much I want to say them out loud.
I never knew if I’d be able to have her like this. I buried the feelings and pretended it was fun to flirt with her, but that it was nothing more. I thought that’d work, but I could only pretend for so long.
From the moment I first saw Charlotte, she captured my attention and has kept it ever since.
Little by little, I was giving her my heart without even realizing I was doing so.
Nothing in my life used to make sense. It was like a puzzle where I had all the pieces but had no idea how to put them together.
But now, the pieces fit together perfectly.
I know exactly how I feel—how I’ve always kind of felt about her deep down —and it all makes sense.
I’ve fallen for my best friend. Having her like this was the final piece to finally admit to myself that she owns my heart.
I’m hers.
Now, all I have to do is muster up the courage to ask her if that’s something she’d ever even want.
“Tell me a secret.” Charlotte’s words break me from my thoughts of her.
Her words catch me off guard. I open my mouth, not knowing how to even respond.
If I were brave, I’d tell her exactly what I was thinking, but for the first time in my life, I’m not confident.
I’m not able to say exactly what’s on my mind.
I care about something enough that I can get hurt, and instead of allowing myself to be vulnerable, I rack my mind for something else I can say instead.
Something safer.
I force a smile, wishing I could tell her what I really want to say. Maybe another time, I’ll be brave enough. I just need more time to figure out where her head’s at before I put my own heart on the line. I push the wet pieces of hair from her face, my chest aching at just how beautiful she is.
“You want a secret?” I ask, my voice hoarse.
She nods, her fingers still absentmindedly playing with my hair.
I lean in to softly kiss her for a moment to buy myself time.
So many different things run through my mind regarding what I could tell her, but I still settle on something that seems safe.
I pull away as I let my mouth turn into a smirk.
“My secret is that I’m considering hiding your toy from you so next time you get dirty thoughts about me, you just come to me instead. ”
It isn’t the most vulnerable thing I could say to her, but it’s a way for me to test the waters. I want to know if she thinks this is a one-time thing or if she wants this to happen again as badly as I do.
“Is that an invitation?”
My chest loosens ever so slightly at her question. “Yes. An invitation. A demand. However you want to look at it, I want you to come straight to me next time.”
“What if I tell you that I think about you like that far more often than you think? You might get sick of me wanting you.”
My jaw clenches for a moment. I fight the urge to throw a question right back at her: What if I tell you that I’ve fallen in love with you and it pretty much feels like, besides my daughter, you’re the only thing I think about?
I keep that question to myself. For right now, it’s enough to know that at least she’s open to this happening again between us. Now that I’ve had her, it’ll never be enough.
“Oh, Char,” I begin, peppering kisses against her forehead.
“Listen to me when I say this, sweetheart. I’ll never get sick of you wanting me.
You got that?” I bring my gaze to hers, loving that despite already having a flush to her cheeks because of the way we fucked each other, she still blushes at my words.
“Got it,” she whispers. And before I can do something crazy like tell her I’m in love with her, I kiss her, hoping that maybe another night, I’ll have the nerve to tell her my biggest secret…the one about being head over heels in love with my best friend.