15. Piper
15
PIPER
I'm honestly not sure how long it is between when my family leaves and the owner of the cafe comes over to check on me. I've completely disassociated, staring at a blank space on the wall, waiting for Anam or Kelly to message me back. I don’t even know who else to turn to.
“How are we doing?” The cute woman from behind the counter steps into my line of vision.
I startle, jostling my lap. The cat makes a noise of irritation before he resettles himself. I scratch him behind the ears.
“Pretty crappy, actually,” I say automatically, the cat purrs under my fingers. “I mean—he’s great. I feel better having him around.”
The woman gives me a bright smile that lights up her whole face. “Mercutio’s always good at knowing when people need a little comfort.”
“Well, he really picked the right lap today,” I mutter. Mercutio blinks up at me slowly with bright yellow eyes. “Is he up for adoption?”
“Absolutely. All our cats are.” The woman waits a brief moment before speaking again, clearly full of nervous energy. “Are you interested?” she finally blurts, her enthusiasm is infectious.
“I really, really am.” Maybe it will help, not being completely alone in my house. Mercutio isn’t exactly a watchdog, but I’ve always wanted a pet.
The woman leaps to her feet and scurries across the room to a pile of papers.
“This is actually so exciting! This’ll be the first adoption we’ve had from the cafe. We just opened a couple weeks ago. I’m the owner, you know? This place has been a dream of mine for a long time. I’ve been working with cat fostering and adoption for years. This cafe has been an absolute whirlwind. That was your family, right? The birthday party? They were cute! I’m glad I could rent out the whole space to them!” She continues rambling as she returns with a clipboard, pen, and papers, bouncing on her toes as she hands them to me. “Normally, we recommend getting two cats at the same time, so they are well socialized and don’t get lonely, but Mercutio doesn’t really have a bonded partner.”
“Me neither,” I joke. “Peas in a pod, huh buddy?”
The cat doesn’t respond.
“I’m Bailey, by the way.” The woman is all smiles.
“Piper.” I gesture to myself.
“Do you live with anyone? A partner, kids, or pets that you might want to get acclimated to the idea of a new cat?”
“Nope. It’s just me all alone. My ex was allergic, but he’s not a factor anymore.” I pause. “Oh, is getting a pet a bad idea if I just had a big breakup?” I ask when my fingers touch the clipboard. For a split second, it’s Ant’s face that pops into my brain, not Colin. How irritating is that development? The guy who was supposed to stop my obsession with Colin has almost completely replaced him.
“Well, we do have a fostering program. You could always do that, if you aren’t sure. There’s no chance the allergic person will move back in with you?” she asks.
“No,” I say instantly. This time, it’s Colin’s face that pops into my head. “No, he definitely won’t be coming back.”
“Well, then I think you’d be the perfect person for a cat like Mercutio.” She gestures to the cat in my lap. “Did you have any questions?”
I bark out a nervous laugh. “Not unless you’ve had someone declare that he’s your fated-mate?” I joke, a silly thing to ask a complete stranger.
She blinks, looking a bit surprised. “Yeah, I have, actually.”
I gape at her for a moment. “I—are you serious? I don’t actually know anyone who’s been with a cryptid. Let alone mated to one.” I laugh nervously. “It was a cryptid, right? Not just some random weirdo?”
She gives me a bright smile, opening and closing her fist in a way that implies she’s still adjusting to a new weight on her finger. “My fiancé is a Bigfoot."
I glance at her hands, there’s a giant stone on her ring finger. It’s really pretty. She’s really pretty, with an adorable smile and wide hips. She seems put together, well adjusted, doing well, running her own business. A life plenty of people would find enviable, someone I might actually get good advice from.
“And he’s good? He’s fine? He’s not creepy or anything?” I laugh nervously at the end, hoping she'll say something I find reassuring.
“Yes. I mean, no, of course not. He’s good to me. Really sweet.” She shakes her head.
“And he’s your…mate?”
She has one of those smiles that are so wide, her face might break. “He is.”
I don’t say anything for a moment. “I had a one-night stand,” I blurt, if anyone is going to help me, it might actually be this complete stranger.
She perches on the bench across from me. “With a cryptid?”
“Yes.”
“And he told you that you were his mate?”
“What does that even mean?” I laugh, simultaneously feeling awkward and terrible.
“True love, soul mates, your forever person.” She smiles, like she’s thinking of the most delicious dessert in the entire world.
My heart skips a little beat. “That sounds…”
“Scary? Terrifying?” Her smile doesn’t drop.
“I was going to say, really comforting. To be that sure of something. How do you know? You’re a human. Right?” I add with mild suspicion. I don't know all the types of cryptids, let alone what they all look like. Maybe there is a pink-haired Mongolian cat-whisperer or something.
“Yes, I’m human," she laughs before continuing. "Do you already have inexplicably strong feelings for him, find him instantly attractive, and feel ready to ignore basically every self preservation impulse to keep being with him?”
“I… yeah…” I bark out a nervous laugh as I consider. She hit the nail directly on the head. “Yeah, I guess I did feel all of that.”
She nods. “From what I’ve heard, that's what it’s like for all humans. It’s a bit more obvious for cryptids. Humans evolved with more mating options, so we don’t get quite the same intense driving urge to be with a compatible mate when we find one. At least that’s the reigning theory on the message boards.”
“Message boards?” I ask. “Online?”
“Yeah.”
“Could you tell me the names? And could I um… Look you up on there?”
There’s something like a twinkle in her eye. “You aren’t ready to give up on your cryptid yet?”
“Ugh. I wish it were a bit easier. He said he knew the moment he set eyes on me.”
“You just met this guy?”
“Yeah, over the weekend. Things got—intense.”
She chews on her bright pink lip for a moment. “If there’s someone giving you trouble we, my fiancé really, have a lot of resources at our disposal. Money and manpower both. If you need help, we could—even if that sounds weird because you don’t actually know us. Every cryptid I’ve met has been fully devoted to their mates, but some of them can be really strange and I hate to think your mate would do anything bad to you.”
“No!” I insist, surprised by my desire to defend him. “I mean I don’t know. He’s just—I know I’m being stupid. I should never want to see him again.”
“What did he do?” Her face grows serious. “Do you need me to call anyone?”
"No! I'm fine. Fine. I think—" I laugh a little, thinking how ridiculous this is, and all of a sudden, everything comes bubbling out of me in one long stream. "He followed me home, took some of my junk mail, and some of my other garbage. And then he told me he loved me and wanted to be with me forever." A loud laugh breaks through my relief admitting everything out loud. “I think he might be stalking me? He could be outside, right now, waiting for me! And I’m not even sure I’d be angry about it!” I start to laugh so hard that Bailey joins me.
"I'm sorry. It isn't funny,” Bailey says in between giggles.
"No, it isn't." I can’t stop laughing myself. "I barely know the guy! What am I going to do?"
“What do you want to do?” Bailey asks more soberly.
“I don't know!” I admit loudly.
“Well here, if you want some help figuring it out—” Bailey hands me her business card with her phone number and screen name scribbled on the back. “Call me. Please. If you feel like you need help.”
I take the little card gratefully. At least now I have something resembling a plan.
“Remember,” she says, with shocking sincerity, “I have muscle on my side. Say the word, and we will do what we need to make sure you are safe.” She sounds almost like a mobster offering to do a hit.
By the time I get home it’s already starting to get dark. Nights come fast and early this time of year in the Pacific Northwest. It makes sense that a Mothman would settle here. The darker it is, the more likely that he could be following me home. That idea gives me little chills of excitement and not fear, in a way that I find very irritating.
When my ride pulls up outside my apartment, there’s a van parked out front. My eighty-seventh surprise for the day.
“Piper Hamilton, right? We’re with the storage company, ma’am,” a large gargoyle announces as I approach. He’s tall and broad, with thick gray skin and large wings folded against his back.
“Storage company?”
“We’re here for ‘Colin’s Stuff’, according to our clipboard.” He taps one gray finger against his piece of paper. There’s a little logo on his shirt with two gargoyles carrying a box and the words ‘Stone Solid Storage’ underneath.
“Colin’s stuff,” I repeat slowly.
“We were asked to wait here until you returned. Everything’s been paid for. We’re supposed to transfer his things to a storage facility. If you could just point us to what you need moved.”
“Right, right. Of course I can.”
I lead them inside and up the stairs to the second bedroom. Everything remaining from my destroyed relationship is in there. Everything Colin decided wasn’t important enough to take to New York with him and he left here for me to deal with. I gesture to the space. There are a couple boxes of clothes and books. His collectibles, the comics that we decided were his, a whole stack of Warhammer miniatures that he never got past the primer coat.
“Take it all. Everything in the room. It’s all his.” I stand in the hallway, watching as three muscled gargoyles pack up the room, marching everything outside, being careful their wings don’t graze my walls.
It doesn’t take long to clean out the small room. They load everything into their truck, and in under an hour they are headed away.
And that’s the end of Colin. His stuff is out of my apartment, and I flushed him from my body with an insane one-night stand. There’s nothing left of him but a few fading memories.
I’m free.
I sink onto the floor of my now empty room and search the internet for the biggest, most obnoxious cat tree I can find.