Chapter Seventeen
Moth
“Are they going to kill me on sight?” Alia climbed off the bike and followed me to the front door of our building.
People who didn't know our place would think it was one big house for four men. We had wanted to preserve the aesthetics of the older building so we'd kept our conversions to the inside only.
“They won't attack you as soon as you walk in the door,” I muttered, unlocking the front door and letting her in.
I wasn't sure I was ready to have her in my domain, which had been why I'd organised the meeting in Fly's apartment on the bottom floor. I could hear the guys rumbling voices as soon as we were in the hallway.
Alia tugged on her sleeve as she glanced up the stairs and then back to the door marked One.
I gripped her chin and made her look at me. “I wouldn't let anyone hurt you. As fucked up as I am, I made a promise to protect you.”
Her eyes widened as she stared at me, the beautiful shade of blue sparkling from the light above. I shoved down the rising emotion that tried to grow in my chest. My obsession was purely sexual. I couldn't let it turn into anything else.
“Thank you,” she whispered, “I've never had anyone care enough to want to protect me.”
“That's not true.” I narrowed my gaze on her, frustrated at how blind she could be. “Your brother tried.”
She hiccupped and dropped her head, wrenching her chin out of my grip. Tears dripped down her cheeks and I cleared my throat, regretting my words. I hadn't meant to hurt her, but her lack of self-awareness drove me insane.
“And once Brandon is locked away,” I went on, “you can live to honour your brother. You can put all this behind you and live your dream in your bookshop.”
“That’s right,” she said meekly. “Without you too.”
She swiped at her cheeks and I reached for her, cupping her damp jaw.
Nodding, I clenched my teeth. “I’ll just break your heart, you know that.”
Her eyes creased at the corners, but she kept her composure, her throat bobbing as she swallowed. “I wish you'd find another way to deal with your pain…” She put up a hand when I opened my mouth to interject. “…but I respect your choice and when the time comes, I hope you'll say goodbye.”
My chest squeezed tight and the numbness that had been my friend for so long cracked, just slightly. Fuck.
“Let's go.” Releasing her, I turned and knocked on the door.
We'd always had a knock before you enter policy, even when the latch was on. Four men, with wildly different needs, didn't need to walk in on the others doing their thing. Ant was the worst for walking around naked, any time of the day, and would often answer the door with everything hanging out.
The image of my friend distracted me from whatever Alia had just awoken in me. I couldn't face it, not now, not ever. I had too many goals to achieve, too many people to avenge.
The door flew open and Ant stood there, fully clothed, luckily. The guys knew I was bringing Alia to talk about the plans for Friday night. I had requested that they be on their best behaviour.
“The stripper pole is ready,” Ant announced, waving us in. “I can't wait to see your moves.”
Alia gasped as she followed me in, her usually pale cheeks burning red. Ant waved at her, a frown on his face.
“Not you, sweet cheeks,” he said, pointing at me. “This guy.”
Rolling my eyes, I shoved past him, knocking his arm and entering the main kitchenette living area. Fly was sat on the couch, his broken leg out in front of him, watching Spider set up a stripper’s pole. The bastard hadn't been joking.
“Have you ever danced?” Ant asked, his eyes dark as he looked at Alia.“Maybe you could give us a show.”
Alia glanced around at us before her spine straightened and her shoulders squared, clearly making her mind up about something. She turned to Ant and looked him straight in the eyes. “You can be a bastard to me all you like, but I remember when you were eleven and you pissed yourself at school.”
Ant's mouth dropped open and his hands clenched by his sides. “Bitch,” he said, looking at me, “She's got ballsy.”
Being with the guys calmed the storm that had simmered within me. They brought me back to reality, reminding me why I had to stay disconnected from the world.
“I hear you're musicians.” Alia wandered away from us, heading straight to Fly and Spider. “I never imagined you making music.”
“What did you imagine?” Spider tilted his head to the side, his hair dangling past his shoulder.
His demeanour wasn't all light and rainbows. In fact, his stare was a warning, one that I'd seen many times before.
I went to step closer, to give him a warning of my own, when Ant put a hand out to stop me, raising his eyebrows when I glanced at him.
“Something insect related,” Alia said, sitting on the couch near Fly. “I don't know what the official term is, but you guys were crazy on all things bugs.”
Spider lifted his head and glanced between the rest of us. A burst of laughter escaped us all, resounding around the room. Alia stared blankly, her forehead slowly creasing into a frown.
“What?” she said, her pretty eyes wide.
Fly looked at her, his gaze tracing the length of her figure. “For a pretty book girl, you're not that smart, heh?”
“Fly,” I warned, my tone tight as my skin burned.
His gaze shot to me, his eyebrows flicking up. “Oh,” he muttered, “it's worse than I thought.”
“The whole bug thing was a code,” I said to Alia, going to the fridge and taking out a beer. “To keep us hidden.”
Alia's mouth opened in a small o. My cock hardened as I imagined pushing it into the tiny hole that her mouth currently created. Fuck.
“I wish you'd told me,” Alia muttered, “back then. I never would've called the cops. I would've kept your secret.”
We stared at her, the energy in the room shifting. If I hadn't staked a claim on her, the others would've gone for her as soon as she'd walked in the door. They knew that I was fucking her and had made an agreement to leave her alone.
“We couldn't trust anyone.” Fly eyed her.
Ant stepped forward and ran a hand over his shaved head. “Look what you did when you were humiliated – unintentionally, I might add – and you think knowing would’ve stopped you from ringing the cops?”
Her gaze dropped and she wrung her hands in her lap. “I don't know, I like to hope I wouldn't have if I’d known the truth.”
“It doesn't fucking matter anymore.” I moved to the centre of the room, glaring at my brothers to try and diffuse the simmering anger. “Her justice has been served.”
“Yeah,” Ant laughed, “You've served her so all is forgiven.”
Alia shrunk in on herself, her gaze snapping to me. Hell, I should've told her that the boys knew everything that went on in one another’s lives. We were making money to survive, but also to expose those who had hurt us. We worked together every day, righting the wrongs of the fucked up world.
“Don't fucking talk about her like that,” I snapped, rage heating my skin.
Ant held up his hands, warding me off with a look. “Alright,” he said, moving to sit at the island between us. “No need to be so protective. I'm not sure I could've resisted either, my friend.”
Something snapped in my brain and the anger pushed my muscles to move. I flew at my friend, my fist ploughing into his chin. We crashed to the ground, the chair sliding out from under Ant and scattering across the floor.
An arm came around me, holding me tight and hauling me away from Ant. I held my hands up without resistance, moving over to the balcony door and going through it without looking back.
My chest heaved as I paced off the patio and onto the grass, growling low in my chest. Why the fuck was I overreacting to my friend's joke? I was numb. I'd been numb this whole time. So, why was I now reacting to any negative mention of Alia?
The scrape of crutches on the patio alerted me to Fly's presence. He was the only one, other than Wasp, who I could actually talk to without the fear of ridicule or scrutiny. The other two had been just as cynical as me, yet, they enjoyed life a little more than I had. I somehow doubted that they’d meet Fly and me on the bridge once our list was complete.
“I know you don't want to hear it,” Fly started.
“So don't say it,” I replied.
“If you let these emotions grow, it risks everything.”
I couldn’t deny his statement, even though it squeezed my chest. If I let myself get too attached to Alia, it would derail our carefully laid out plans. We'd been working on our goals since the moment we'd been shipped off to our families on the compound.
“Did you hear back from our informant?” I muttered, trying to distract myself from my own emotions.
Fly grunted and I lifted my gaze to look at him. His leg was in a full cast, running from his crotch to his ankle. The crutches held him up, but he was weak as fuck. We couldn't go forward with our main goal until he'd reached full fitness again.
“Yeah,” he said, “but there's nothing of consequence going on over there right now. We need to concentrate on this Brandon cunt and then we can turn our attention back to the cult.”
My gaze slipped to the glass patio doors and I caught sight of Alia, who was talking to Spider. Ant wasn't in the room, no doubt he was cleaning himself up or plotting his revenge on me. That was the thing about four boys who had known one another almost their whole life. We'd lost Wasp together, been tortured together and always fought together. Sometimes that spread to one another, like most natural born siblings.
Still, I didn't feel any guilt. The bastard had been rude about Alia and that wasn't okay.
“You're right.” I ran a hand over my hair. “The quicker we deal with Brandon, the quicker I can get rid of Alia.”
“You think it'll be that easy?”
Snorting in Fly's direction, I snarled. “I've done it before, I'll do it again.”
“This time is different.”
“How so?” I snapped.
He raised his eyebrows and shrugged. “Oh, I don't know. Maybe your anger every time someone mentions her or says anything bad about her. Or the photos you have on your bedroom wall.”
Surging towards him, I paused right in front of him. “Shut the fuck up. They were surveillance photos after I first bumped into her. Don't try and twist it.”
“Yeah, maybe at the start. You did what we always do when targeting our next hit. However, the photos are still up and I wonder what you do when you lie on the bed, staring at them.” The corner of his lip lifted into his cheek. “You're obsessed with her, Moth, and you need to sort it out.”
He was lucky he was incapacitated, otherwise I would've taken him down like I had Ant.
“Let's just get this plan sorted so she can go.” I sniffed and went back towards the apartment, slipping inside and turning to watch my friend hobble over the patio.
“So,” Spider said, sitting comfortably next to Alia. “You sound so innocent with your bookshop. How did you end up involved with Moth?”
Her mouth opened, only to shut when she glanced at me. I hadn't told them the full truth of her finding me on the bridge… or the way I'd jumped in to protect her every chance I got. Fuck, I'd already admitted my sexual obsession to Alia, but Fly had seen it too. It was getting out of hand.
“Ant!” I yelled. “Come here.”
My friend appeared, sporting a slight graze on his chin. It was bright red and slightly streaked with blood. I'd put my ring on that morning, a reminder of what we'd sworn when we'd stood on the bridge after escaping our captors.
“What?” Ant snapped, righting the chair and sitting on it.
“As you know,” I started, nodding at Fly who entered the apartment and leaned back against the wall. “There's an event at Alia's bookshop in two days. We’ll be dressing up as models from dark romance books.”
I glanced at Alia, whose cheeks were pink as she stared at the blank television. I was about to go on when she visibly shook herself and looked straight at me.
“You'll need to wear masks,” she interjected, looking around more confidently, “so no one knows your identity.”
“Masks?” Ant grinned. “I like that kinky idea.”
“And be topless.” Alia smiled as she bit her bottom lip.
I narrowed my gaze on her. “You want us topless?”
Fly chuckled. “I'm glad I'm sitting this out.”
Alia glanced at him, her gaze flicking briefly to his torso. What did she think when she saw how tight his t-shirt was on his muscles? Did she think it was a shame that he couldn't join in on our scheme to take down Brandon?
My gut tightened and I glared at her. If she wasn't careful, I'd… what? Fuck her over? No, I couldn't do that. Shit, I was even jealous of my brother, who hadn't shown any interest in Alia. If I wasn't careful, I was going to lose it and someone… or several people… would get hurt.
“Fine,” I snapped, shoving down the dark emotions, “we'll go topless with masks. We serve drinks and we keep an eye out. Alia is going to lure Brandon in with a cryptic social media post. We're hoping he'll be clever enough to fall for it and turn up.”
Alia shuddered and cleared her throat. “He'll no doubt turn up in a balaclava or something similar. I need to try and get him into the room opposite the club, which will be closed to the public. I'll then provoke him and he’ll come for me.”
I rubbed my neck as heat exploded within me. I’d tried to persuade Alia not to use herself as bait, but she had insisted that the CCTV would be the only way the police would believe her.
“We'll be waiting on the outside of the room,” I went on, “and when we hear him attack, we'll intervene and rescue her. Brandon will be tied up and the police called.”
“Wait.” Spider frowned. “The cops will want to interview us. We can't let that happen.”
Alia put her hands on her knees, brushing the top of her knee high boots with her nails. “This part is Moth's idea.”
“We have a few contacts who would be happy to earn a bit of money.” I watched the guys’ reaction.
There was a risk getting others involved, however, the men I'd be hiring had helped us with various nefarious missions before. They were men who would cover for us, much less speak our names.
“You'll get the others to model too?” Ant asked, his gaze narrowed on me. “And we get out of there before the cops come?”
Inclining my head, I glanced at Alia. “As long as Brandon is knocked out – self-defence – and Alia isn't hurt, we'll leave, swapping in the other models as doubles to give evidence.”
“Sorry,” Spider rubbed his neck, his nails catching the legs of his spider tattoo. “Why aren't we just getting rid of this guy? This sounds like hassle we don't need.”
Alia's gaze snapped to me, her eyes widening. The fear of our refusal to help with her plan was evident in the expression on her face.
“Alia has chosen her revenge for Brandon.”
“He fucked me up,” Fly butted in, “I could choose a different revenge, one much more painful.” He smirked at Alia. “Wouldn't you enjoy that more?”
Rubbing her lips together, Alia shook her head. “No, he's claustrophobic. I want him to live a life where he has no freedom. Jail time is the only way.”
Ant snorted and Spider laughed loudly. I held my tongue, not wanting to shit on Alia's idea of revenge.
“Beautiful woman,” Spider said, tilting his head to the side, “we're the kings of vengeance. I promise you there's many ways he can suffer long term.”
Standing, Alia strode to the TV and turned to face us. “I appreciate your offer of…” She frowned. “…I'm not quite sure, but I do think this is the best way. If he doesn't get time, I'll rethink my plan. By that time, you guys would've moved on…”
Her eyes widened when I bared my teeth. Fucking hell, no one else was supposed to know about our vow, much less one of the people that had previously been on our list.
“Yeah,” Fly spoke up, “we've got a lot of work to do.”
The others nodded, not questioning Alia's choice of words. Good. Clearly, it was just my fucked up brain that had read more into it than she meant.
I looked at her, going still when our gazes clashed. There, in my chest, was the awakening that I couldn't afford. Shutting it down instantly, I coughed.
“So we're all agreed on the plan? Arrive at a certain time, serve some drinks to thirsty women.” I winked at Ant, who wiggled his eyebrows. “Then wait for my cue, which will be a wave in the air. I'll be standing in the hallway, watching everything. Once he's got her in the room, we'll all move to the hall and go in when we hear Alia shout our safe word.”
“Once you've got him incapacitated between you,” Alia picked up where I left off, “You can take your masks off, swapping them with your friends at the top of the stairs before leaving as you escort everyone out of the building.”
“Sounds like a solid plan,” Fly said, “I almost wish I was able to help, despite the topless bit.”
“You'd love it.” Ant rubbed his nipples through his T-shirt. “All the women copping a feel.”
Fly grinned and glanced down at his leg. “Do you think they'd give me a bed bath? I’ve got terrible chaffing right near my balls.”
“Fuck off!” I moaned, looking at Alia who was biting her finger and looking at the floor.
Holding up a hand for attention, I scowled at them as the laughter died down. “This is serious. If anyone fucks up, I'll fuck you up. I promised Alia revenge on her stalker ex and once it's done, we go back to our lives.”
The others stared at me, every single one. I could read the query in their eyes and I didn't fucking like it. How dare they question me with just a look?
“Just one question,” Ant piped up. “What happens if he manages to hurt Alia or any of us?”
Lowering my head, I closed my eyes slowly. Alia would hate my answer, but she wouldn't have a choice. I would not be in control of myself, if by some chance, she got hurt.
I looked up from under the hoods of my eyes and answered honestly, staring straight at the woman who I'd do anything to protect.
“We kill him.”
*
Stepping through my front door, I paused and studied the mess on the kitchen counter. My apartment was the exact replica of Ant's, except nowhere near as neat and tidy.
When Alia had insisted on getting a taxi home, I'd allowed her to go. We all needed to prepare, mentally and physically. I trusted that Alia would know what to do at the bookshop to make her plan work. I also had to speak to my contacts to book them in. We'd worked with them on luring our enemies before. They were hard men, who would do anything for money and principal. They were the closest to friends we could trust, but they were still dispensable.
Going to the fridge, I opened the door and took out a beer. There was hardly any food but there was plenty of alcohol. Not that I drank often, it impaired my driving skills too much. However, when I was wound tight, I did one of two things… drink or fuck.
I opened the lid of the recycling and pushed everything on the counter off the side, straight into the container. It wasn't always a mess, but my moods varied from day to day so there were worse times than others.
Alia's face came into my mind so I made my way to the little hall and into my bedroom. The curtains were closed, the dim red light on. It was dark and dingy, just like my personality. Ever since I'd lost my brother, I'd locked myself away, hiding from the world.
“Alia,” I breathed, going over to the far wall and studying the paper photo prints that filled it. “You're fucking with my head.”
Fly had picked up on my obsession. He'd been right about the photos. They spanned a few weeks after I’d bumped into Alia, taken from outside the shop or when she'd run up the road to get supplies. I'd even gone to her parents to see if she ever visited them.
“If only you knew that I was just like Brandon.” Sighing, I sat on the chair in front of my PC and took a swig of beer.
Cringing angrily, I threw the bottle across the room, cursing when the beer splattered over the pictures of Alia. My wall of different shots had been meant for me to analyse the best way to get her back for killing my brother. The more I'd met up with her, the more I'd needed to look at her face, to fuck her… to masturbate to the photos. Every day. Fuck, Fly had been right.
And I was wrong. I was not like Brandon, not anymore. Once her body had imprinted on me, I'd stopped turning up to take pictures. I didn't want to be that guy. I just had to protect her instead.
“How do I get you out of my system, Sunshine?” I muttered, picking up the beer bottle from the floor and downing the liquid that was still left. “Fucking you hasn't worked.”
Reaching out, I stroked her face on one of the pictures. She had inserted herself into my psyche all those years ago, and as much as I thought I hated her, I couldn't stop thinking about her. But it was time to let her go. Because the only other option wasn't an option.
If I stayed obsessed with her, I'd want her with me, at all times. And that would only lead to her death.