41. Chapter Thirty-Eight
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Lila
T he day before the show was always terrifying, even when I had a full crew. But this time, I had genuine reason to panic.
I paced the floor, mind going through the endless routine of what all we could do to fix this. The final dress rehearsal tonight was figured out. But what about the future? If we didn’t find someone in a week by some miracle, would we have to use a recording for the guitar?
God forbid if anyone found out about it. I was known for doing everything live, but I’d been the victim of lip-synching scandals for many years. Even my backing track was controversial. If the guitar were recorded, then people would assume everything else was too.
“Lila!” Juno called as she walked in. “It’s time for your last dress rehearsal.”
“Coming.”
“And I have a surprise for you.”
I didn’t know if I could handle a surprise, but then Barry walked into the living room in his usual LA disguise.
“Hey,” he said. “Ready to practice?”
“You’re stepping in for today?”
“We have to have some sort of run-through.”
“Thank God . I would have understood if you wanted today off, but more practice is better.” Words poured out of me and I couldn’t stop them. “But if you want to spend time with Ruth and Tom, we can make this go faster and—?”
His hands came to cup my cheeks. “Breathe,” he said. “It’s going to be okay.”
Here, with him close to me, I could almost believe it.
“S-sorry. It’s been a lot.”
“I know. Let’s start with practice and we’ll go from there.”
I nodded and let him lead me to the car.
“You okay?” Juno asked. “I gave you extra space in case you needed any time to . . . melt down.”
“We came close,” I replied. “But we’re good.”
She smiled and nodded at Barry. Juno had been worried about me as my stress piled up, but even she knew he would pull me out of it.
And everyone else, apparently.
When we got to the arena, my entire team was relieved to see Barry. The news had traveled quickly and Justice had been fielding questions for a while. One of my backup singers hugged him so tightly I thought he might burst.
“Ready to start?” he asked after everyone finished fawning over him.
“Are you? You’re the first instrument to open us.”
“I’m always ready, Lila.”
I smiled, knowing it was true. I got into position and started singing my first notes and he joined in right after.
As we got into the show, I realized this practice felt different than all the others. Instead of avoiding looking over at my band, I did more often than ever. Seeing Barry there filled me with more joy than I ever imagined.
In the plan for this tour, I only went over to sing to my band members once, but it didn’t feel like enough now that Barry was back in it. I smiled at him brighter than I would have ever smiled at Mickey.
If he were staying onstage, I’d work in much more time to be next to him.
But he wasn’t, and I needed to remember that.
Barry
After the rehearsal, everyone looked less stressed, and I didn’t have the heart to tell them this was a one-time deal.
Rose and I went home where she was finally able to un-Lila herself. She took melatonin and fell asleep right after. I lay awake, still thinking about tomorrow.
I was happy she’d managed to sleep because she needed all the energy she could find for her show the next day. I should have done the same, but I had far too many thoughts swirling in my head.
“You’ll find some way to make it work,” Tom had said.
But I hadn’t. I’d been listening to Lila Wilde, admiring her creativity, all my life. And if we had more time, I was sure we could somehow figure something out. But it was the eve of the concert and we were in the eleventh hour.
When Lila had wanted this, she’d donned a wig and made a new version of herself. And it wasn’t like I could do that too.
I froze as the thought hit me.
Was there a reason I couldn’t wear a wig?
I got out of bed, mind reeling. How did I not figure it out sooner? If I followed Lila’s lead, then I could be a different person onstage. I’d never admitted my identity in LA and had hidden my hair.
It was like I was planning for this.
Pulling out my phone, I dialed Malia. She answered on the third ring.
“I have an idea,” I said.
“You do?”
“Yes. What if I had a wig too?”
The line was silent and then she chuckled. “I was about to call you and mention the same idea. I had it last night.”
“Last night? And you didn’t bring it up?”
“Wigs are hard to make, especially if fitted to you. I was spending the day seeing if it was even feasible.”
“What did you find?”
“Someone who would work overnight to get it done. She’s got a good reputation too. I hope you didn’t have plans.”
“I can be free,” I said.
“Thank God. You’ll have to come up with a new name. You never did before.”
“I’ll think about it once I see my new persona.”
“Meet me at my office then. We have a lot of work ahead of us tonight.”