22. 22 November, 1811
ELIZABETH
Charlotte Lucas had started the rumours!
Elizabeth sat with her heartbreak for less than half a minute before she responded to Mr Darcy. “Thank you, again and again, for all that you have done to restore my good name. I believe I am ready for the private talk and ‘important question’ I have been avoiding almost since I met you.”
Mr Darcy put up a hand. “We cannot do it right now.”
She was surprised and almost immediately indignant. “What?? You do not want me anymore? Am I tainted by the gossip even though you know it is not true?”
He reached for both of her hands and held them firmly, giving them a little squeeze.
“I still want you. I will always want you. But….you said you were almost positive you wished to marry me when the rumour had just gotten started. Almost positive is not, as you know, fully positive. Now that the gossip is disproven and your name is on its way to being restored, you are undoubtedly feeling grateful. Indeed, you just thanked me.”
“It is only natural that I am grateful!”
“Let us take at least two days before you take the step that you were not certain of before the surge of gratitude welled up in you. Naturally, I wish you to choose to marry me, but I wish you to make the choice because you like and respect me and genuinely wish to marry me, not because of gratitude or expectations or fear of what your father will say or do.”
“That is very sensible…. I have a grand idea: let us make a list of twelve labours that I must perform for you, so that you can feel gratitude to me, too. Obviously, not the famous Herculean stunts of strangling a lion, killing a serpent with many heads, and so forth. Perhaps I might simply…umm…draw a lion? Kill a spider with many eyes? Clean out the stables of Longbourn?”
“Allow me to counter your grand idea by assuring you that I am already incredibly grateful to you for every kind word, for every smile, for every moment you have gifted me your presence.”
“You, Mr Darcy, are too, too lovely. I look forward to hearing a very important question in two days.”
“Unfortunately, Elizabeth, there are other important questions that are not marriage proposals. As a matter of fact, I have made a list….” He dropped her hands and took from one of his coat pockets a piece of paper.
“Of course you have.” She laughed and reached for his list. “With your use of the word unfortunately, I imagine it will address every wretched subject that haunts my mind.”
She read the list swiftly.
Important Non-Proposal Questions
Meeting with Father/Mr Bennet - What should be said? Should this meeting wait until after the proposal? Should the meeting be held with both of us plus Mother/Mrs Bennet, since she will hopefully continue to be pro-Darcy?
Meeting with Miss Charlotte Lucas - Is it important to hear from her own lips why she started false gossip? Should it be held at Lucas Lodge or another location? Should this be a private meeting with just Elizabeth and Miss Lucas?
Meeting with Goulding - He should be thanked for his work in combatting rumours, but should he also be let down / turned away as a suitor before the proposal? Should this be a private meeting with just Elizabeth and Goulding?
Meeting with earl and countess - What did they hear, see, and wonder about? Do they require explanations, and should those explanations be truths or polite fictions? Should this be two meetings, one with just Darcy and the other with both of us?
Where should Elizabeth live before meeting with Father/Mr Bennet?
“Oh, my. Every wretched subject, indeed. I shall deal with each item in order. “My father —we wait until the proposal. Charlotte—I will do this one alone, hopefully today, at her house. Goulding—I will also meet with him alone, also today, on the way to Charlotte’s house. Your aunt and uncle—I suppose that you should meet with them at Netherfield while I hold the first two meetings. I can go to Netherfield for nuncheon and the afternoon, and together we can handle whatever needs saying and doing. Where I should live—I hope the Nicholls will continue to host me. Or your sister and me.”
“You made short work of that list.”
“I merely attempted to schedule time for each item. I have achieved exactly none of the items as of yet.”
“I will confer with Georgiana and Mrs Annesley, to see what they want to do with their day today and if they wish to spend the next night here, or not.”
“And I will speak with Mr and Mrs Nicholls,” Elizabeth said.
They went their separate ways but soon met again and exchanged the news.
“We are all welcome to stay as many nights as desired,” Elizabeth said.
Mr Darcy informed her that Georgiana and Mrs Annesley would ride back to Netherfield Park with Elizabeth but not go on to Lucas Lodge.
They wished to return to High Cross with her in the evening, and so the two maids would spend the day at High Cross.
“I suppose I will see you, Mr Darcy, at around noon, at Netherfield.”
“Until noon, then,” Mr Darcy said, kissing her hand before he left.
Elizabeth, Georgiana, and Mrs Annesley soon set off for Haye-Park.
Elizabeth was quite glad to have the excuse of Georgiana and Mrs Annesley waiting in the carriage while she spoke with Mr Goulding.
She thanked him sincerely for his role in investigating the origin of the rumours and in countering them.
“Mr Darcy told me that you went amongst the shop owners and shoppers of Meryton to make the point that the rumours were false. I thank you again, and I hope that the effort was not humiliating.”
“Not at all.”
The second goal of the meeting felt difficult to accomplish. She steeled herself and said, “Mr Goulding, we have known each other our entire lives, but I do not believe we suit as a couple.”
He nodded and said, “I have become aware that you feel that way. Say no more, Miss Elizabeth. I hope you realise that I think you are a wonderful lady, and I truly believe that Darcy is worthy of you. I wish you the best of every good thing.”
“Thank you, Mr Goulding. I return your wishes.”
He walked her to the door and said a final goodbye as she walked to Mr Darcy’s carriage.
She turned just before entering the vehicle, meaning to wave to him.
But she saw that his entire stance had sagged, and his smile had disappeared.
She felt a pang for him and swiftly accepted the footman’s help into the carriage.
“How did it go?” Georgiana asked tentatively.
“It was fairly easy. He is a gentleman, and he behaved so. No harsh words were exchanged.”
“Good.”
“The next meeting will be tough,” Elizabeth said.
Mrs Annesley surprised her by putting her hand over Elizabeth's clenched hands.
“Ugly actions often come from ugly emotions, but people generally excuse themselves with pretty stories. Be sure to listen to the pretty story your friend tells, because there will be some truth in it, I imagine, but be aware that she must have been feeling envy or anger towards you, or both; she might have been feeling fear for herself and anger towards the world, as well.”
“Thank you, Mrs Annesley. I will try to do as you suggest.”
Elizabeth was shown to the parlour of Lucas Lodge, where Lady Lucas and Maria flanked Charlotte.
Maria smiled at her and wished her good morning with an uncertain voice; Lady Lucas greeted her but could not meet her eyes.
“We shall leave you two to speak privately,” Lady Lucas said.
“I know that young ladies who have been such good friends for so many years will wish to…speak privately.” Lady Lucas and her younger daughter promptly left.
Charlotte and Elizabeth took seats. Charlotte was looking down, rather than at Elizabeth, and she said softly, “I am very sorry. I did not mean to start a rumour. I have tried to set the record straight, and I hope you will forgive me.”
“I hope I will, too,” Elizabeth said. “Perhaps, if you could actually look at me, and then explain what you did and why you did it?”
Charlotte glanced up, meeting Elizabeth’s eyes briefly, but then she lowered her eyes again.
“I just told my mother what I saw. I did not mean for her to tell everyone.”
For the moment, Elizabeth allowed that ridiculous lie to stand; Charlotte had always known that her mother was even more prone to spreading gossip than Elizabeth's mother.
For many years, neither Charlotte nor Elizabeth would ever say anything to their mothers unless they wished it spread far and wide.
But Elizabeth put that aside and said, “And what is it that you saw, and that you told your mother?”
“I saw you walking, as you so often do. I had just dealt with the chickens and the cow, and I wished to see where John was in the garden, so I went to the shrubbery walk where I can overlook our land—and part of yours—and I saw you.”
Elizabeth nodded silently, urging Charlotte to go on.
“You were with a man. At first I did not know if it was Mr Darcy or Mr Goulding or someone else. You seemed to be happy speaking together, and then he kissed your hand and turned away.”
“And…”
“Well, I felt that it was startling to see that you were meeting with men in secret, in the early morning.”
“I was certainly not meeting with men, plural, nor was I intentionally meeting with a man. I was taking my usual walk. As you said before, it is something I often do. Mr Darcy was taking an early-morning ride, as is his wont. We did not set up a time or place to meet in secret. We never have done so. We just saw each other, and stopped to converse a while.”
“It—it just seemed wrong. I was certain that your father would be unhappy with you meeting him like that.”
“As I said before, it was not wrong. It was an accidental meeting. Also, the rumour stated that I was allowing liberties—but a kiss on my hand from a man to whom my father has given permission to call on me—that is not him taking nor me conferring a liberty. Allowing liberties would involve at least being embraced or kissed, would it not?”