Chapter 8
8
It was midday on Saturday before Kate made it to Hermione’s. She didn’t remember getting home the night before. The last thing she remembered was being poked by a giant bird whilst she stood on a stage being stared at by her boss and one of her wealthiest clients. She had found the one hundred pounds and golden voucher when she had gone to make a cup of much-needed coffee. A weekend in a romance lodge… Suddenly, the whole sorry evening had come back to her. Knowing Me Knowing You – what had that all been about? She had drunk too much and she had probably made an arse of herself.
Hermione opened the door to her, fresh faced and full of life as usual. There was nothing worse than having competent, sober, happy-go-lucky people in your face when you felt like crap.
Hermione was wearing a flour-spattered apron and Kate immediately smelt the scent of freshly baked bread. It made her feel queasy.
‘Hello Mrs TV Game Show Star!’ Hermione announced far too loudly.
‘What?’ Kate replied, stepping into the house.
‘I saw you last night on the telly! You kept that quiet, sweetie,’ Hermione continued.
‘I don’t believe you saw it! It was on a satellite channel so far down the list, no one should have seen it, apart from maybe a tiny Asian village in the middle of nowhere,’ Kate exclaimed in horror.
‘I like alternative television. So, why didn’t you tell me?’ she repeated.
‘Because I didn’t know! The Lady Dragon set me up and it was awful,’ Kate said as she led the way into the kitchen.
‘I don’t see how spending an evening with that hunk of a man could ever be awful. He looked amazing! That photo you had did not do him justice; he is to die for!’ Hermione exclaimed.
‘God, it was the worst night ever. Right before dinner, the Lady Dragon announces I’ve got to take part in this ridiculous quiz. Then the wine seemed to dry up, but then again, even that could never have been plentiful enough to drown the dreadfulness of everything,’ Kate spoke, sitting down at the table.
‘And Joel? I can’t believe he was dreadful too,’ Hermione said as she put the kettle on to boil.
‘He was OK, nice enough, I guess; he did his job. Not sure the Lady Dragon believed we were a couple but then I told you that would happen the minute I saw his picture; he was too good-looking. I should have gone for someone less handsome, but it was late notice I guess and I couldn’t have taken the one that looked like Dale Winton,’ Kate replied with a heavy sigh.
‘But you won! Well, you were second, you got one hundred pounds and a weekend in a romance lodge.’
‘Hmm,’ Kate answered.
‘Well don’t sound too excited! I wouldn’t mind having a weekend in a romance lodge with him, I can tell you,’ Hermione responded.
‘Don’t be stupid; we aren’t going to go! Joel’s an escort I paid to date me last night; he isn’t my boyfriend,’ Kate reminded, drumming her fingers on the table and trying to quell the sick feeling in her stomach .
‘But you have to go; you’re through to the next round.’
‘Mione! I didn’t want to enter the pathetic contest in the first place. I only played along last night because the Lady Dragon and Frank Peterson were there. It was a one off, and there will be no repeat performance,’ Kate stated definitely.
‘But a weekend away would do you good,’ Hermione spoke.
‘Maybe, but I wouldn’t choose to spend it standing on a stage holding hands with a stranger watching a huge fake dove lay golden eggs,’ Kate answered.
‘That bit was quite naff,’ Hermione admitted.
‘It was all very naff.’
‘So what are you going to do with your golden voucher? Give it to the mad Australians who like to pretend they’re sheep when they have sex?’
‘Did they say that? How scary. No, I’m going to phone the production company. I’m going to tell them Joel and I have split up and it’s up to them what they do with it. Perhaps they’ll give it to the third placed couple,’ Kate spoke.
‘Oh no, not Mark and Sandra, I didn’t like them at all. He kept winking at the camera and she had a moustache,’ Hermione remarked.
‘God, Mione, did you sit through it all?’
‘Yes, with half a dozen cups of nettle tea and some carrot and parsnip crisps. Would you like some?’
‘No thanks, they sound awful. I’d better take Bethan off your hands and get home; I’ve got stuff to look at I’ve been putting off.’
‘Well, Philip’s taken all the children down the park so they can burn off some energy. Cyrus is here today and he’s been driving me mad. He isn’t just whispering now; he’s stamping his feet as he does it which all but drowns out what he’s trying to say completely,’ Hermione informed.
‘Hang on. I thought Philip was away. I wanted to borrow him, remember and you said no and made an excuse.’
‘Change of plan, he’s going relic hunting in a few weeks now. One of his team had an unexpected birth, two months early, baby boy, small but doing well. Anyway, it isn’t as if the ancient treasures are going anywhere.’
‘So was Bethan good? Didn’t wake? Not up too early? Did she eat all her breakfast?’
‘She was an absolute angel, as always.’ Hermione reassured.
‘Oh I’m so glad. Thanks so much for having her, Mione. Can I settle up with you next week – it’s just it’s not pay day until the twenty-fifth,’ Kate spoke, a little embarrassed.
‘Don’t be silly, I don’t want paying. Last night wasn’t child-minding; last night was babysitting for a friend and I won’t hear any more about it,’ Hermione insisted.
‘Thank you,’ Kate replied.
‘How are things financially if you don’t mind me asking?’
‘Fine. I won a hundred pounds, remember,’ Kate answered, hiding her eyes.
‘I’ll read your tea leaves,’ Hermione threatened.
‘Things are tight but I’m managing. Must stop booking escorts, though; it isn’t cheap,’ Kate replied.
‘Well, I have to say, I’m disappointed. I read the runes and I read the cards and they told me that last night was going to be the start of something for you,’ Hermione said with a sigh.
‘Oh, it was; it was the start of my investigation into whether or not the Lady Dragon wears a wig,’ Kate said excitedly, a wicked smile crossing her face.
‘What?! Oh tell all!’ Hermione said, clapping her hands together in delight.