Hunter
Olivia is set up in the rumpus room with a hot chocolate and her latest movie obsession—something about a rabbit and a fox—when an alert tells me a car is at the gate.
Matthew’s car.
I message Six first, waiting for his confirmation that Matthew is in the car by himself, before opening it and allowing him in. They would have let me know if there was a problem before now, or they would have taken care of it, but better to be safe than sorry.
“Problem?” Xavier asks. He closes the dishwasher he’d just been loading, looking expectantly at me.
“I’m not sure. Matthew is here.” It entirely depends on the reason he’s here as to whether there’s a problem or not.
Giving him space today was difficult for me for multiple reasons; the danger is very much still real, and having people watch him is not the same as having him within arm’s reach.
And I’d like to know why he left without telling anyone.
He immediately went to his room when we got home from the docks, and there hasn’t been time to talk to him about any of it.
He’s had to deal with a lot of new things in a short amount of time, and it makes sense that he needs to decompress elsewhere. I just hope that’s all it is.
Miles opens the door before he gets there, ushering him inside.
Matthew nervously glances at him and stops at the kitchen counter. “Uh, hi.”
“We were afraid you wouldn’t come back,” I say softly.
“You were?” He rubs his forearm. “I’m sorry that I didn’t say anything and just disappeared.”
“It’s alright.”
“Not really. I didn’t realise until later that it looked bad.
In a lot of ways, but mostly because there’s a psycho out there that likes to send people with guns after…
other people.” He blushes, red spreading in a way that makes me want to kiss every inch of him and find out if it’s as warm as it looks. “That sounded better in my head.”
“We knew you were safe,” Miles says.
“Right. Yeah. That makes sense. You’ve got people too.
Not ones you send with guns after people.
I mean, maybe you do that. But not like…
” He clamps his mouth shut and shuffles on his feet.
“Sorry.” He twists his fingers together.
“It’s just that I don’t know what I’m doing here.
Why you would even want me here. And also, yeah, why I want to be here.
” He stumbles over his words, then takes a deep breath “You’re all kind of insane, right?
Like seriously crazy. Your whole lives are like an action movie, except it’s not fun; there’s a distinct lack of Bruce Willis and fewer explosions.
I hope there are fewer explosions.” He pulls his bottom lip into his mouth. “There are fewer explosions, right?”
“Entirely depends on the day. Wednesdays are explosion day,” Xavier says with a twitching smile. “Tuesdays are for murder.”
“I can’t tell if you’re kidding or not, which really just drives my point home.”
“The point that we’re crazy?” I ask. I can’t argue with him about any one point.
“Matthew, our lives are not normal. They’re messy, dangerous, and occasionally violent.
The work that I do means that I live a life of secrecy.
” I tip his chin up with my pointer finger.
“I also do school pickup, enjoy coffee with a bit of sweet, have family dinners, do grocery shopping, and even go to doctors’ appointments.
It’s a balance.” I can’t resist rubbing his bottom lip with my thumb.
So soft, just like he is. A heart of gold that’s so different from ours.
Perhaps he should have stuck with his first instinct to stay away from us.
“Balance isn’t the word I’d use,” he says weakly.
“What are you doing here, then?” Miles asks abruptly, frowning. “You’re in, or you’re out. There’s no halfway here.” He’s still standing away from us, like he hasn’t decided whether he wants to close the distance.
“I’m scared,” he says, voice breaking.
“You don’t need to be afraid of us,” Xavier says, placing a hand on Matthew’s shoulder. He leans in, nuzzling Matthew’s ear with his nose. “We would never hurt you.”
Matthew lets out a shuddered breath. “I’m not scared of you.
I’m scared of all of this. What it means, how you all make me feel.
It’s like falling off a cliff, with no way of knowing what’s at the bottom.
” His tongue flicks out to wet his lips and slides over the tip of my thumb.
“I don’t really know you. Not really.” He looks between us, lip trembling. “But I want to.”
“Even if you’re scared?” Xavier asks softly. He tugs on Matthew’s earlobe and then breathes deep into the curve of his shoulder.
“Y-yes.”
“Be sure,” Miles says, finally stepping closer. He scrunches a gloved hand in Matthew’s jumper. “Both feet, Matthew.”
“I thought—I thought maybe I was like… a passing fancy.” He frowns. “No, that’s not the right expression. I thought it didn’t mean anything. You were protecting me, and I was in proximity, so let’s play games with the clueless idiot. You know?”
“Did we ever make you feel that way?” Xavier asks quietly. “That we were playing some game?”
“No?”
“You don’t sound sure.”
Matthew lets out a frustrated noise and drops his arms. “I’m not sure! You’re you, and I’m me, and it’s easy to pick the odd one out.”
Xavier rises, standing in front of Matthew. He brushes his knuckles lightly over Matthew’s cheek. “Attraction has nothing to do with how similar two people are. I’m not in the habit of playing games with those who can’t match me.”
Matthew frowns. “I can’t tell if that was a compliment or not.”
“Games would only hurt you, Matthew. You aren’t built for harmless fun, and I don’t hunt innocent prey.”
“Still have no idea whether you’re complimenting me or not.”
Xavier chuckles and draws Matthew’s face up, kissing him softly.
“It’s more than a compliment, duckling. It’s admiration.
You see the world in a way that we never will.
It’s simply not in our natures to look for the good first.” He kisses the corner of Matthew’s mouth and nuzzles his cheek with his nose. “Can’t you see how much we need that?”
Matthew pulls back, looking so unsure that I want to take him into my arms, kiss him until he can’t breathe, can’t think.
Until he can see the way we look at him.
Maybe it’s not love yet, but he’s part of this now.
An important part. “We need you,” I say simply.
The same way I need Xavier. The same way I need Miles.
“You—you do?”
I turn Mathew’s head so he’s looking up at me. His skin is soft under my thumb, his pulse beating wildly in his throat. I’ve seen him naked, seen his face when he comes, watched him while I’ve come. And yet I haven’t tasted him. I don’t know which sounds belong to me.
His breathing intensifies. “I…”
“Shh.” He’s warm and inviting under me, exactly the way I imagined him.
Sweet and eager. He arches into me on a light gasp, lips parting for me.
Cupping his cheek allows me to angle him.
His hand fists my shirt, and his tongue strokes mine in a random pattern.
There’s something so open about the way he kisses, with a kind of finesse to the softness of it.
His eyes are closed when I break from him, and his blush has moved down his throat and all the way under his T-shirt.
He moans brokenly as I kiss that very blush, licking and nibbling my way down.
Coaxing his hand from my chest, I lift it to my lips and kiss his palm, the tips of his index finger, his thumb.
A whine slips out when I pull his finger into my mouth, sucking lightly.
“Oh God,” he whispers. “That’s—you’re—”
I capture that sound, kissing him again. It’s so hard to stop when all I want to do is consume every sound, devour the very taste of him. By the time I let him go, his eyes are glazed over, and he unsteadily leans back against the counter.
“I think I love you,” he bursts out in a throaty whisper. His eyes widen. “I mean—I didn’t—I—” He squeezes his eyes shut, head down. “Fuck me,” he mutters to himself.
Threading my fingers through his hair, I take hold and use it to tilt him up. “I will, later,” I promise him.
He licks his lips. “I should say something witty and all, you know, confident or something, but I can’t think of anything to say.”
“I’m glad that you came back.” Our world is harsh, and there are just as many bad parts as good. It takes a special person to see that, to see what we are and choose us anyway.
“I had to,” he says in a low murmured voice. “I think—I think I need you too. I don’t really know what that means or what happens next, but I know that if I don’t find out, I’ll regret it forever.”
“I promise you that we’ll keep you safe. We’ll finish this, and then we’ll find out what the future means. Together.”
He nods. “Yeah—that’s—yeah.”
Xavier hugs me from behind, one hand sliding over my hip and the other on Matthew’s. Miles doesn’t join the circle, but he’s right there, still with us. Even when he tries to hide in the shadows, he’s so much a part of this that I can’t imagine it without him now.
This feels right. Having Xavier here, with the promise of a better future, and expanding who we are to include Miles and Matthew.
Xavier and I were never finished, no matter what I told myself.
But with the distrust and the past hanging over our heads like a guillotine, I could never see a way to close the gap between us or to sever our connection completely.
Miles is such a quiet, steady presence, like a guardian. And Matthew is a sweetheart, full of life and light. Maybe this is exactly what we needed.