Chapter 12 Sophie #3
“Tell me how badly you want them.”
His words settle on me like a brick.
Because he didn’t say to tell him how much I want him. He said, “Tell me how badly you want them.”
And for the first time, I realize I do want them.
Every single one of them.
Elijah, my best friend and the man who stole my heart, the man who I’ve loved for so long.
Matthew, my sweet, sweet boy with a heart of gold and a smile that lights up a room and makes me feel alive.
And Benny…
Bitter, hot, bossy Benny who makes me feel fire in every part of my soul and pushes me like no one else.
“Is that what you want to hear, Benjamin?” I ask, reaching for his cock. He grins, letting me have it. I squeeze him hard but he doesn’t falter. “You want to hear all about how I want them to fuck me? Fill me up with their cum?”
Benny removes his fingers from me. “Turn around.”
“No,” I say, squeezing him again.
He smiles. “Turn the fuck around, princess.”
“Or what? You going to make me?”
His hands slide up my body, up my curves. I suck in a breath as he grins.
“Remember, I gave you a choice,” he says, and then he grabs the neckline of my strapless dress and tugs. Hard.
The rip echoes between us, and my mouth falls open as my dress falls to the floor. I’m more than aware that I’m naked in front of him. After all, I never wear a bra with a strapless dress like this one…
I tug on his piercing and he winces.
“That wasn’t very nice,” I say.
“You know what else isn’t nice? You teasing the fuck out of me all day after telling me I can’t fucking have you.” He spins me around, forcing me to drop his cock, and presses my front against the wall, my heart pounding in my chest.
He presses himself against me and I feel everything. His wet, hard cock, and the coolness of the steel in his piercing. The heat of his skin. The heaviness of his body. I should be pissed. Should tell him to stop.
But I don’t want him to stop, because this…
I’ve thought of this so many times in my life. Him finding me, taking me. Owning me.
And now the moment is here, in its entirety, and I can’t stop it. Can’t stop my heart from beating, my pussy from aching. My emotions are clouding my mind.
His cock presses against my heated core and I let out a moan without thinking about it as I see him smile out of my periphery.
“You going to tell me you don’t want me now, kitten?” He runs his nose up my neck, his lips ghosting my skin. My entire body shivers.
“Benny…”
“That’s it, princess. Say my fucking name.
” His lips latch onto a spot on my neck and my insides flush with heat.
“You know how fucking crazy you make me?” he purrs, pressing his cock against my cheeks.
“How hard it is to resist you now that I know what you taste like, what you feel like around my fingers…”
He nudges my legs open and I don’t stop him. I close my eyes and my body goes limp in his hold.
“All I can think about is what you’d feel like wrapped around my cock. And you tell me it was a mistake, and then you let Matthew taste this pretty pussy, you let him make you come, and then you kiss Eli…”
His cockhead presses against my sex and I realize that if I don’t put a stop to this, he will fuck me. Right here, like this.
Just like I always imagined.
“You’ve been a bad girl, Sophie. So fucking bad,” he breathes, kissing my neck. “And bad girls need to be punished.”
I push back on him, trying to take more of him. I know this is going to come back and bite me in the ass quite literally, but…I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want this.
That I didn’t want him too.
“Then punish me already,” I say. “Or are you all talk and no action?”
He growls and a moment later I feel him slide into me. Hard. I gasp as he grabs my hair, pulling me back to look at him, and for a moment, he doesn’t move. We stare at each other until all that can be heard is our breathing.
“You don’t tell me what to do,” he hisses, his lips hovering over mine.
I push back against him, needing more. My insides throb from the stretch because he’s big. Bigger than any other cock I’ve had. Definitely bigger than Keaton, that’s for sure.
“I make the rules,” he says, but his voice shakes. He’s losing control.
Or maybe he never had it to begin with.
I shift forward slightly, his cock dragging through me. He catches my movement, pulling back slowly. So slowly that I can feel every movement, slick and precise. He stops at the tip, his piercing tickling the edge of my sensitive pussy. I feel the shiver all throughout my body as he does so.
“You come when I say you do,” he says, thrusting back into me in one hard push.
I cry out because it feels so good. It hurts, but it also feels amazing. I’ve never had anyone like Benny before, and I don’t think I’ll ever have anyone quite like Benny again.
He’s in a class all his own.
“I’m not b-begging any m-man to let me come.”
“We’ll see about that, princess.”
He crushes his mouth to mine and starts to move. But it’s not as fast or as hard as I expect. Like I always imagined being fucked by Benny would be. And I imagined it so many times…came to the thought, the idea, the fantasy of him ravaging me…
Instead, he fucks me slowly. Agonizingly slowly. He draws out his motions, causing me to feel every drag of his thick cock through my quivering folds before he slowly pushes inside of me, stretching me.
My legs shake because when he enters me, I feel him in my entire being.
His cock is thick and the sensation of him filling me, his piercing dragging along my skin, is making me see stars behind my eyes.
He thrusts into me a little deeper each time, taking his time.
My orgasm swirls inside me like a hurricane, culminating on the edge of reason.
My eyes fall shut as the ecstasy approaches without mercy.
Long, torturous thrusts drive me over the edge and then he stops.
My pussy aches, clenching tightly as I try to push back, but he vacates me.
There’s a pause, moments of silence before he drives back into me again, fucking me nice and slow against the wall in a soothing rhythm until I get so close to the edge, I know I’m going to topple over and drown in the pleasure…
And then he just…stops. Pulling out of me again, leaving my insides aching, and I growl in frustration. My orgasm recedes, and I whine.
“No…no…please…” My head falls against the wall as sweat beads on my brow and my insides pulse, aching, needing release that continues to slip through the cracks.
“Say this pussy is mine and I’ll let you come,” he says. “Or you can tell me just how Matthew made you come with his tongue, and maybe I’ll let you come.”
Oh no.
No, no, no…
“No,” I bite out, pushing back, but I can’t get to him. He teases my entrance with the tip of his cock, but he doesn’t ease back in. Not yet.
“Pity, I guess I’ll just—” He moves away and I panic. My body spasms, my heart thudding in my chest, and my insides scream at me because we’re so close.
“No, please!” I cry, turning to look at him, my gaze pleading with his.
I don’t miss the smile on his face. He presses himself back against me, positioning his cock at my entrance again.
His piercing teases me as does the edge of his cock, and I suck in a breath as my orgasm rears its wicked head again, knowing euphoria is just beyond its reach.
“Please, what?” he says, his voice smooth and dark. Smug.
Because he knows exactly what he’s doing, and if I had any concerns about Benny losing control, they are long gone. Because I’m certainly not in control here. Not now.
Me and my aching pussy are at his mercy.
Fucking bastard.
He slides into me with ease, slowly once again, and I moan from the relief.
He picks up his pace, his thrusts heavy and hard. My body feels strung so tight I think I may snap, even as my pussy accommodates him easily now because I’m so wet, so stretched out.
He fits like a damn glove inside of me and part of me knows the crescendo about to hit me is going to ruin me in so many ways.
I’ve never come this much in such a short span of time, and part of me wonders if it’s even possible. That maybe that fading feeling is because my body can’t handle being put through the sexual wringer like this…
“I can’t, I’m—”
“You can and you will,” he purrs, slamming into me harder this time. “You’ll come when I say so. When I tell you to. Because you need to learn how to be a good girl for me.” He runs his hands through my hair. “And for them.”
I feel my orgasm like a hurricane barreling toward me, harder than before. And I know I’m not going to be able to stop it. Not now.
“Benny…” My voice is strained, my legs going numb. “Please, I—”
“Say you’ll be a good girl for me, Sophie. For us.” He grunts. “Promise me.”
I tense, trying to hold off but it’s difficult. “I—”
Another heavy thrust as he kisses my neck. “Promise.”
I close my eyes and nod, tears pushing behind my lids.
“Promise,” I say again as he slams into me. I don’t know if I can keep said promise, but I want to.
“That’s a good girl. Now come for me.”
He doesn’t have to tell me twice. I shatter like a million pieces around his cock and I feel the moment he breaks. It’s like a domino effect. I groan and he does too. My vision goes white behind my eyes as he kisses me, thrusting fast and hard as he erupts inside of me.
My legs shake as I take every thrust, and I can feel him filling me up. Spilling out of me…
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I know we have just crossed a line we’ll never be able to come back from. Because I just let Benny Anderson fuck me. Without a condom.
Shit.
I mean…I’m on the pill, but still. I don’t usually go sans condoms until at least, like, the third date. And I’m certainly not dating Benny. I just got out of an engagement for God’s sake!
I tense, and he stops, his cock pulsing inside of me as panic hits. He kisses my neck softly and when he pulls out of me, I nearly fall. He catches me with ease, lifting me up into his arms.
“It’s okay,” he whispers, kissing my ear. “I got you.”
A thousand thoughts and emotions hit me all at once. Memories of us. Me and him, but also me and the guys. All the men who didn’t stay. Keaton and that woman. My brother and Raegan, kissing each other like the world doesn’t exist.
I wrap my arms around Benny’s neck, pulling him closer. His scent and hold feel safe. Warm. I’ve never felt like this with anyone except Elijah…
He carries me to the bathroom and kneels down to start the bath. I blink as he carefully steps into the tub with me and relaxes into it, holding me close against his body. The water fills around us and I say nothing as the tears come.
“I’m sorry,” he says. “I didn’t mean to push you so hard, I—”
“No,” I say. “I just…feel like…” I let out a nervous laugh. “I don’t usually give in this easily.” He purrs against my neck as I add, “I’m on the pill. Just…so you know.”
His breath on my skin is warm and I think he’s not going to say anything, but he does.
“I don’t have anything, if that’s what you’re worried about. Rumors might be true, but I’m clean as a whistle.”
My body unravels with tension I didn’t know I was holding as I nod, a sob escaping my throat.
“I pushed you too hard,” he mutters. “I’m sorry.”
“No…you didn’t. I just let go of this huge weight and—”
Benny holds me tighter, burying his face in my hair.
“It felt good. Really,” I whisper.
It’s not a lie. Truthfully, it did feel good. Like we’ve crossed some invisible line, stepped over it and now the field is open. Uncharted territory beckoning me to keep going…
“You’re a good girl, Soph. Really. I’m just an asshole.”
The unspoken words between us are so loud, it’s as if we can hear them, evident like our heartbeats. His tone is soft, full of concern. Sadness, dare I say, and I reach with my foot to shut the water off before the tub overflows. I lay my head on his chest, his heartbeat prominent in my ears.
“No, you’re not an asshole,” I say. “You’re intense. There’s a difference.”
His breathing slows, but he doesn’t move his face from where he hides it in my hair.
“My last girlfriend cheated on me,” he says carefully.
I freeze at his words. “What?”
“About a year ago. Haven’t really been with anyone since then. She was married. Didn’t tell me about her husband. My ex before that cheated on me too. And the one before that—”
I move, looking at his face. “How many times have you been cheated on, Benny?” I ask.
“Too many,” he says. “So, I get it. I know how you feel. But I’ve also known about a lot of those instances too. Played my part as the other guy. Kinda hard to break a role once you’re typecast.”
I curl against him, my hand resting on his palm. I keep his gaze on me.
“I just…don’t want to be the other guy again. I know what we’re doing is…” He lets out a heavy breath. “I know you have feelings for Eli and Matty. And maybe you have feelings for me too…” The last part is barely a whisper. “Maybe you don’t. I don’t fucking know.”
“Benjamin…”
“So, I’m not going to tell you to pick me. They’re…better men than I am. Both of them. I just…don’t want you to forget about me and think of me like everyone else does. A thrilling carnival ride not worthy of…more.” He sighs.
“Oh, Benny…”
“I can handle being their mistake,” he admits. His lips graze my neck. “I just don’t want to be your mistake.”
I grasp his chin with my hand, feeling the faint tinge of stubble there as if he hasn’t shaved in a day or two. “I could never forget you,” I tell him, and it’s the truth.
Warm water sloshes around us as his gaze softens.
“And you’re not a mistake. I’m just a mess and I don’t want to drag you or Matt or Elijah down with me.”
Benny holds me tighter. “That’s not your choice to make, princess.”
There’s a soft, quiet pause and all that can be heard is our breathing and the soft slosh of the water.
“I know,” I whisper.
Benny adjusts me as he reaches for the soap, carefully washing me in the gentlest of ways, and I can’t help but feel like a weight truly has been lifted between what happened earlier and now…
“Maybe we can just be a mess together,” he says, his voice softer than I’ve ever heard it.
I nod as he washes the soap from my body. “If we’re a mess, might as well be hot ones, right?” I say, humor finding its way into my voice.
He chuckles. “The hottest.”
I don’t know how long we stay in the bath, or when we leave. All I know is as I drift to sleep in Benny’s arms, I feel like for the first time, everything’s going to be okay.