16. Xaden
SIXTEEN
Xaden
Ivy’s body is responsive and warm, a warmth that’s eluded me for years. My entire body thrums with pent-up energy, and I’m desperate to explore every inch of her.
The curves of her breasts, the feeling of her hard nipple between my teeth, are intoxicating, and I’m so very ready to taste more of her.
I want to hear her cries as she falls apart for me. I want to pleasure her—in every sense of the word.
“Xaden, oh my God. I…” Ivy’s hips flex up as I drag my kisses down her stomach and to the crook of her hip. “Ugh!”
“That’s it, baby.” My cock is hard as a diamond, aching to slip inside her, but I’m going to take my time enjoying this. “Those fucking sounds are perfect.”
Ivy’s panties are soft cotton that’s ribbed vertically across the black fabric. They smooth over her hips in a boy-short cut, a memory of the type nearly choking me.
No, you want this, Xade. Stay here.
Impatience flares and I have no time to pull Ivy’s underwear off her, so I shove the material to the side as I press my lips to her skin.
“Fuck!” She cries out, and damn, I am so glad that we can be loud.
I tease her sensitive flesh with my tongue, sliding it up and down before angling toward her seam. As I slip my tongue inside, Ivy’s taste blooms in my mouth, and my erection twitches.
Ivy’s hands go to my head, her fingers squeezing the roots of my hair as I claim her with my mouth. She arches, and the encouragement is incredible, a wicked pride rising through me as I pleasure her with my tongue.
“That’s it,” I repeat. “Come for me, Ivy. I need to feel it.”
I can hardly believe the words coming out of my mouth, but I just let go. I lose myself to this moment and allow the present to be the only thing that matters.
“Xaden, oh God. I’m…I’m…”
Her thighs squeeze against me as I probe deeper, reaching a hand up to join my efforts. I glide two fingers inside her, hooking the sensitive spot at the top as I flick her with my tongue.
Ivy surges around my hand, clamping down. I taste her arousal flaring and marvel at the pulses that hum through her.
With her hips rocking against my hand, I work faster with my tongue. The grip on my hair tightens, and then Ivy cries out.
“Ugh!”
She falls apart for me, and I keep stroking until the waves have stilled. But I’m far from done yet.
Her breathing is ragged and quick, and I crawl up Ivy’s body to plaster her with more kisses. She reaches for my face, pulling my mouth to hers, and it’s everything I want.
Knowing that she can taste her arousal goes straight to my cock, and it kicks. I plant a hand behind her head on the couch, reaching with the other to shove my shorts down.
My erection springs free, and Ivy lifts her hips for me as I guide her panties down her legs. As she wraps her legs around my waist, the blunt head that drips for her is poised at her entrance.
I wait just a moment, and Ivy nods without breaking the kiss. It’s exactly what I needed from her, and with that, I press forward.
“Oh, Xaden,” Ivy whispers as I sink myself inside her.
She surges around my shaft, and the squeeze is too damn good. I plunge forward until I bottom out inside Ivy, and she squeaks, her hips bucking forward.
Still, she claims my mouth with her, kissing me in a maddening swirl, and I start up a rhythm as Ivy works with me, her legs flexing around my hips.
I can picture us, naked on her rickety couch, and the lust swirls.
Reaching under her hip with one hand, I angle Ivy up just a hair, and on the next powerful thrust, I go even deeper.
“Fuck!” Ivy abruptly calls out, her forehead resting on mine as she works to mirror my rhythm again. “Oh, Xaden…I…you’re so…it’s so…much.”
I sheathe myself fully, up to the hilt, and Ivy whimpers. Balancing on my knees, I take her face in my hand while the other keeps her hips tipped up for me.
“You’re doing so good, baby.” I swirl my hips in a circle, grinding my cock against her walls. “Taking me so well.”
Her body responds to the praise, clenching around my shaft, and I deliver slow, pointed thrusts. It’s so damn good, and pressure skyrockets through me as my release roars forward.
“Xade, please. Please . I want…more.”
All I can do is grin. This woman is a fucking angel, and it would be more than my pleasure to give her everything she asks for.
Kissing her quickly, I grip under her hip tighter, using that hold and the one on the back of her neck to pull Ivy up and onto my lap as I lean back onto my knees.
The angle forces me as deep as possible, and Ivy yelps against my lips. Her walls clench around my shaft, and I groan as I pick up the pace once more, driving myself in and out of her tight pussy.
“Oh, God,” Ivy sobs, riding me with everything she has, “I’m so close.”
I take her by the face, kissing as I surge my hips forward and back. “Fall apart for me, baby. I need to feel you.”
Her chest heaves up and down as she breathes, and Ivy wraps her arms around my neck, clinging to me. The ache in my shaft triples, and I have to grab Ivy’s hips and bounce her harder, faster.
It’s a depraved, fabulous tango between us, and we’re rushing up to that edge together. Our groans and staccato movements fill the air, echoing off the walls.
I piston stronger, striking deep and quick as I squeeze onto Ivy’s hips. She’s this tiny thing compared to me, and it feels indescribably good to claim her and fill her like this.
“Xade,” her tone is strained, and I can feel exactly what she feels, “I—fuck, fuck, fuck!”
Ivy cries out, her body crashing through an orgasm that makes her pussy deliver a vice-like grip on my cock. Her eyes roll back in her head as it drops backward, and I hold her pressed to my chest, giving her everything I have—and more.
I’m gone, climaxing right along with her. The sensation is blinding, and my shaft kicks hard as I release my spend deep inside her.
It’s exquisite. It’s perfection.
And it’s all because of her. Ivy .
The moment slows down, and eventually, I pull Ivy into my arms as I lie back against the arm of the couch.
“I don’t think I can move.” She giggles softly.
“Well,” I smile down at her, kissing the top of her head, “the good news is that you don’t have to. Daisy’s having a sleeping over with Mia again. We’ve got all night.”
Ivy hums, turning into my chest and snuggling in. “Good. That’s very, very good.”
“Hey, sweetie!” I open my arms as Daisy runs up the steps of the house and leaps into my waiting hug. “Did you have fun?”
She grins from ear to ear, and I smile back, already knowing the answer. “Yes! Princesses and movie tent and popcorn!”
Mason stands with Daisy’s bag on the porch, and as I switch Daisy to my hip, I gesture for him to follow me inside.
“Another hit, Mason. These weekly sleepovers were a great idea. Come on, I’ll pay you with a drink.”
He nods, the corners of his mouth turning down in an upside-down smile. “Don’t mind if I do.”
As I walk him inside, I set Daisy down in the living room with a show on, and she happily watches TV as I get Mason and me a beer.
We crack them open at the island, each taking a stool, and I let out a sigh. It’s only been an evening, but I’ll admit that the house felt too quiet this morning without her.
“Looking a little ragged around the edges there, Xaden. You feeling alright?”
Raising my brows, I try to avoid swallowing too hard at the obvious call out. I knew I didn’t look particularly “rested,” but damn.
“Just didn’t sleep much last night. That’s all.”
Mason cocks a brow, immediately reading into the situation, and I really wish he wasn’t so insightful.
“Oh?” The insinuating tone in his voice is thick as fog. “And why’s that?”
“Ugh,” hanging my head, I rub my fingers across my forehead and try to suck in some fresh air, “fine. I may have…slept with Ivy.”
Pounding lightly on the counter in front of him, Mason grins before pointing his beer bottle at me accusingly. “I fucking knew it. You’re all… glowy .”
I can’t help but laugh at that one, and I swallow down another large gulp of my drink. “I am not glowy, asshole. It’s just…been a minute. I may have…made up for lost time. A few times."
“Ha! Well done, Xade. So, was it everything you dreamed it would be?”
I hear the tease in his voice, but Mason is also offering a note of seriousness, opening the door for me to get out all the things I want to say.
“You know,” I smile, memories of the previous evening swimming through my mind, “it was amazing, if completely unexpected.”
Mason raises his brows at me, scoffing. “Unexpected? I mean, you had to know that was going to happen eventually. You said yourself that you were attracted, and from what I’ve seen picking up Daisy or dropping off Mia, you two were dancing around each other constantly."
Another laugh is forced out, and I shake my head. “Okay, fair enough. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. Still…I didn’t really think we were going to push past the stuff holding us back. Even after I told her that I was attracted to her the other day.”
Mason grins, finishing his swig of beer and nodding. “You told her. That’s a big step for you. Good job. And I mean, come on. Of course, she’s attracted to you right back. Look at you.”
If I was big on blushing, I would be turning bright pink right now, and as it is, I’m not sure I don’t have some staining on my cheeks.
Taking compliments has never been my strong suit, so I distract myself with another sip of my beer.
“Thanks,” I offer half-heartedly, “I guess. I, uh, it was something.”
The guilt I’ve been pushing down all morning bubbles up, choking me. I swig some of the much-needed alcohol and sigh as I finish it with an audible swallow.
“Uh-oh. You alright there, soldier?”
Tension radiates through me, and I try to shrug through a head shake. “Don’t call me that, Mason. I hate it.”
“Hey, sorry, man. But seriously, what’s up? You should be floating on cloud nine right now. I mean, I’ve seen Ivy. She’s stunning and amazing with Daisy. That’s a damn catch right there.”
“You’re not wrong. Really. I feel so damn lucky—and undeserving. I mean, after what happened with Maeve, should I really be pursuing a relationship? I could just get her hurt like I did before.”
My guts churn, and I try not to see the car accident in my head again. But the sights and sounds haunt me, looking for a way to throw me to the ground at any turn.
It was my fault Maeve died, my fault that Daisy lost her mother. The thought of doing that again…I can’t. I just can’t let that happen.
“Hey, pull up, Xade.” Mason’s voice snaps me to attention, and I remember that I’m not alone. “You’re spiraling. I can see it. Take a breath.”
I nod, doing my best to listen to his advice. Mason is a damn good friend, and I’m so grateful to have him as a part of my life.
“Sorry. It’s…rough. You get me.”
Mason nods. “I do. And I know it’s a lot to carry every day. But I want you to listen to me for once when I tell you that your life cannot be just about grief and guilt. You deserve happiness."
The guy doesn’t beat around the bush. It’s what I like about him, but it’s also a pain in the ass when you have to be the one on the butt end of some tough love.
“It’s not that simple, man.”
“Yeah,” Mason levels me with a stare, “it is. Sure, easy is a different story, but it is simple. You need to let go of the past. Maeve wouldn’t want you to be alone for the rest of your days, beating yourself up.”
A hard cut of laughter escapes me, sarcastic and sad. “Ha, sure. You’re not the one remembering all the times she joked about haunting me if she was the one to go first.”
“If I recall, you two were talking about getting old at that point. And I don’t think she would stick to that threat if she could see you now.”
I sigh—because it’s all I can do, apparently—and polish off the last of my beer. My wedding ring clinks against the glass as I purposefully tap my finger against it.
I haven’t taken the thing off. It’s been two years, and I’m still wearing it.
“You’re my friend, Xade. I want you to be happy. Between the three of us,” I know Mason is talking about himself, me, and Hudson, the other local with a kid, and his wife’s brother, “you’re the only one who hasn’t found it yet. You need to seize this opportunity.”
I’m nodding my head before I realize it. “I know, I know. I want to. Really. But I’ll admit that it’s a little weird to be attracted to my nanny. Though, I suppose you know how that goes.”
“Hey, don’t look at me. I was into Bridget before she was my nanny. That was just this weird thing we did in the middle.”
“You never felt weird about being a stereotype? I mean, I’m banging the nanny. That’s a whole thing.”
Mason laughs. “Well, maybe don’t say it around Ivy like that, but I see your meaning. And sure, it felt weird. It’s not like I was looking to gain some reputation for bedding the help if Bridget had chosen to leave again. Thank God she didn’t. But…”
He lets the word hang, finishing off his drink as his brows go up again.
“I will also admit—just to you, I might add; this is a bro thing—it was kind of hot.”
I burst out laughing, nearly choking on my own spit. The confession is exactly what I needed, and as we chuckle like idiots together, it’s several seconds before we can regain composure.
“I really needed that. Thanks, man.”
“Any time.” Mason eyes me, pointing. “But I’m serious. Don’t tell Hudson or Bridget I said that. I’m not looking to get my ass kicked.”
“Your secret is safe with me. Actually, on that note.” I adjust in my seat, remembering the other thing that’s been bugging me. “I’ve also noticed something weird with Ivy. Well, not her exactly, but the situation. I mean, she’s not weird. It’s this thing I’ve noticed when she’s working.”
Mason leans back in his chair. “Spit it out, dude.”
“Ugh, Ivy has been getting texts or messages or whatever. They seem to…upset her—a lot. The look on her face when another one comes in…it’s not good, Mason. I want to help her, to understand what’s going on, but I don’t want to push her. Scare her away, you know?”
He blinks pointedly, swallowing hard as his eyes fall to the floor. “Yeah, I recall some nasty messages in my time. She got an ex?”
“I don’t know. I haven’t been able to ask. Ivy hasn’t mentioned anything. I know she has a sister. She was on the phone with her the other day, and it sounded like she was worried about her. Which, I know, that’s what you do for siblings, but yeah. It could be related.”
“Well, as boring as my advice might sound, there’s really only one thing you can do.” He meets my eyes head-on, not pulling any punches. “Talk to her. Ask. But, you know, you don’t have to make it an interrogation. Go on a date, a real one, not just a bang-fest, while Daisy is with me.”
“A date?” I raise my brows before they dip down in a deep furrow as I consider his words. “Seriously? Your advice is to take Ivy out on a date.”
“Yup. It’s good for talking. And you’ll find out if there’s more to this than just the sexual chemistry. Dates exist for a reason, Xade.”
“Jesus,” I laugh, shaking my head. “A date. Okay. I guess I’m making a call.”
“It’s good when you listen to me. And I owe you for the outside clarity you delivered when Bridget and I were getting together.”
“Apparently,” I cock my head, smirking, “it’s what we do for each other.”
We both chuckle lightly, and then I wrap things up with Mason. He’s more than happy to head back home and allow me the chance to call Ivy.
I haven’t dated in actual years, and to say that I’m nervous is a vast understatement. Still, Mason claps me on the shoulder and offers his support.
“I’ll be here, dude. Let me know how it goes.”
Nodding, I open up the door for him. “I will.”
Alone once more, I peek into the living room to see how Daisy is doing. It’s only been like fifteen minutes, and she seems plenty entertained with acting out her TV show with her dolls.
“Daddy’s going to make a phone call, honey. Then we can get some snacks.”
She doesn’t turn around. “Okay!”
Daisy makes me smile, and it’s that comfort that I try to bring with me as I step into the kitchen again to call Ivy.
It rings a few times as I stand by the counter. Ring, ring, ring.
“Hey, Xaden. What’s up?”
Ivy’s voice sounds light and relaxed, the sunshine within her coming out through her words. I completely clam up, deer in the headlights.
“Xaden?”
Shaking myself, I attempt to refocus and clear my throat. “Umm, sorry. Hi. Yeah, umm…”
Fucking hell, what am I saying? “How are you?” How are you?! No!
Ivy laughs, that lilting sound that penetrates my chest. It’s so easy-going and genuine.
“Haha, I’m fine. How are you?”
“Great. I’m amazing. Fantastic.” Enough adjectives, Xaden . “So, umm, what would you think about going somewhere…with me.”
There’s a beat of silence, and then I hear Ivy hum gently. “Like…on a date?”
My stomach clenches, and I have to force myself to keep talking and not just hang up. “Yes.”
“Huh, well, how ‘bout that. You actually asked.” She chuckles, and the tension bleeds from me. “If you think you can behave, young man, I will allow you to take me out.”
The joke, the way she teases me like I’m one of the kids she watched over, zaps away any remaining nerves. I instantly think of just how naughty we can be, last night as evidence.
“Ivy,” I drag out, letting my tone darken to something wicked, “being around you makes it very hard to behave. And I’d hate to give you false promises.”
“Oh,” she whispers, and I know my words have hit their mark. “Well, maybe being naughty isn’t the worst thing.”