Chapter 7
CHAPTER SEVEN
NASH
Something was wrong. Really, really wrong.
I’d known it the second I’d seen Forest getting dropped off by Heath—and how on Earth had he gotten a ride from him? Heath was a PE teacher, and his high school was nowhere near Forest’s community college, so I had no clue how their paths had crossed.
Not that it mattered. Forest was home, and he wasn’t doing well.
I’d been in the living room, doing some research into gluten-free recipes and foods that were known to have anti-inflammatory effects, when the RING alarm had told me someone was in the driveway.
I’d watched on camera as he’d worked himself out of the car, a wince on his face, then as he said goodbye to Heath.
How had Heath not picked up on Forest’s pain? Or maybe he had, and he’d just ignored it, waiting for Forest to bring up the topic himself. He couldn’t know it was this serious, though I couldn’t help but wish he did. Keeping this from Creek did not sit well with me. At all.
But that was not my most pressing concern right now. Forest had more immediate concerns. I wasn’t sure what kind of bad news he had received—though I had a suspicion it was job-related, considering he’d been on campus—but whatever it was, it was bad. Really, really bad.
As much as I wanted to know what had happened, I couldn’t push him into talking about it. Not until he was ready.
So in the meantime, I sat in the living room and made a weak attempt at diving back into my food research as a hundred different scenarios ran through my head, none of them good.
How much more could Forest take when he’d been dealing with one thing after another? He had to be near his breaking point, from what I could tell. He’d said he didn’t usually cry, though I had some strong opinions on the thought process behind that apology.
My father had been one of those men, the kind who firmly believed boys don’t cry.
He’d also been a proponent of corporal punishment, which I could attest to from personal experience.
He’d always stayed on the right side of outright abuse, if barely, but that hadn’t made it okay.
It hadn’t made me respect him, as had been his intention, but hate him and later on, judge him for being such a shitty parent.
My father hitting me hadn’t even been the worst, though his disciplinary moments held nothing but bad memories for me.
He’d had even stronger opinions on homosexuality, and not from a religious point of view, like Bean’s family.
My parents had gone to church, but they hadn’t been strict about it.
But being gay was unmanly, my father had told me, and he would have no sissy for a son.
When I’d told him I couldn’t change who I was, they’d kicked me out.
Honestly, they’d done me a favor. My grandparents, my mom’s parents, had immediately taken me in, and my grandfather had had some strong words for his daughter on choosing her husband over her son.
It hadn’t made a difference in her decision, but his defending me made a massive impact on me. I’d never forgotten it.
They’d been there for me ever since in every way. Without their unconditional love and support, who knew what would have become of me? They had accepted me wholly and had always encouraged me to be myself, including all my emotions. I was the man I was today because of them, not my parents.
Hopefully, I could model some of that attitude to Forest, who clearly had some baggage of his own in that aspect. If he needed to cry, he should. I was convinced many a problem could’ve been avoided if more people blew off steam with a good crying fit.
My phone rang, interrupting my thoughts.
How had we even functioned without caller ID?
I wondered that sometimes. It sure as fuck made it easy to know which calls to let go to voicemail and which to answer.
Luckily, I had all my coworkers’ numbers programmed into my phone so I could see when they called.
“What’s up, Kaelan?” I answered.
“Hey, just wanted to give you a heads-up that you’ll be working with a sub tomorrow because I’m not coming in.”
I frowned. In all the months I’d worked with him, he’d never missed a shift. “You okay?”
“Yeah, yeah, no worries. I just have…an obligation that came up.”
Well, that sounded mysterious, but if he didn’t want to tell me, that was fine. “Any idea who will be your sub?” As soon as I asked the question, I knew the answer. If it had been anyone else, Kaelan would’ve just texted me. “Please don’t tell me it’s Franco…”
Kaelan sighed. “Hence the phone call.”
Franco was one of our substitutes, and he was what could charitably be described as an acquired taste.
One I hadn’t gotten used to yet and most likely never would.
“He’s a lunatic with a death wish… In twenty years of service, I’ve never been as scared as when he’s driving the rig.
And he won’t fucking stop talking. The last time I was on a shift with him, he talked about his koi pond for an hour straight.
An hour! Fuck, I’m half-tempted to call in sick tomorrow. ”
“You’re telling me. I was once treated to a two-hour lecture on fly-fishing, something I literally couldn’t possibly care less about. Hell, I don’t even eat fish.”
“I do, but that doesn’t mean I wanna hear all about fishing.” I groaned. “Just when I thought this week couldn’t get any worse.”
I hadn’t meant to blurt that out, but any hope that Kaelan would ignore that remark vanished instantly when he asked, “What happened?”
“It’s…” I didn’t even know where to begin. If I should begin. “It’s not me. It’s a friend. My roommate. He’s…dealing with some health issues.”
“Your roommate. You mean Forest.”
“Yes, Forest. My roommate.”
“He’s a little more than that, bro, but whatever you say.”
I frowned. “What do you mean? Yeah, we’re friends, but…he’s still my roommate.”
“Friends? Is that what your generation calls it?”
“My generation? You’re making me sound ancient.”
“Well, you’re Gen X, aren’t you?”
“Gen X?” I sputtered. “What the fuck? I’m a Millennial, dude. Not even close to being Gen X.”
It took a second before he burst out in laughter, and I realized he’d been baiting me, the fucker. “Very funny,” I said. “Hilarious.”
“I thought so too, but thanks.”
“Glad I could provide some amusement.” I waited until he was done laughing. “What did you mean by that remark? About Forest and me being something other than friends?”
“Dude, you talk about him all the time.”
“He’s got a lot going on in his life, and I’m worried about him.”
“Worried. Is that what it is?”
“What else would it be?”
Kaelan snorted. “If I have to explain that to you, maybe I should start calling you a Boomer instead.” When I said nothing—an old trick to get people to talk—he sighed. “Forget about it.”
“No, I wanna know what you mean.”
“I’m not sure you’re ready for this, and I don’t mean that in a patronizing way. I thought you were fucking around, but now, I’m not so sure. Maybe you really don’t see it.”
“See what, Kaelan? The fuck are you talking about?”
“Jesus, Nash, you have a crush on him. A child could see it.”
A crush? On Forest? That was…not as preposterous as I wanted to claim.
I had been talking about him a lot, apparently, and there was no denying he was on my mind often.
But that was because I was concerned about him, right?
He was dealing with so much, and while I wasn’t certain what bad news he’d gotten today, I had a sinking feeling it was about his job. So, of course, I was worried about him.
“Just because I talk about him on occasion and am involved in his life doesn’t mean I have a crush.”
“On occasion?” Kaelan snorted. “Fuck, bro, I know more about him than I do about my own roommate…and I’ve been sharing an apartment with that guy for two years.”
“Maybe I’m more observant than you.”
“Oh, I have no doubt about that, but that’s not why. You like him.”
“He’s…nice.” And cute. Very, very cute.
“Nice? Lord help us when you ever try to flirt. It’ll be the end of the world as we know it.”
He was being so dramatic. “Good thing I’m not trying to flirt, then, merely stating a fact. Forest is nice. He’s kind. Of course I like him. As a friend.”
“A friend you wanna fuck.”
“Kaelan!”
“What, am I wrong? You’ve thought about it, admit it.”
Of course I had, but that was normal, right?
I was a gay man, and so was he. Plus, he was gorgeous, so the sexual chemistry was to be expected.
That was purely biological. Nothing weird about that.
“I’m a gay, single man. Of course I’d feel some sexual attraction to him. Explain to me how that’s wrong.”
“Oh, there’s nothing wrong with it. I never said there was. But you may wanna ask yourself some more questions.”
“Like what?”
“Do you wanna fuck me?”
I almost choked on my breath. “What?”
“Do. You. Want. To. Fuck. Me?”
Was he crazy? Why would he even ask that? “No! Jesus, no. You’re… You’re way too young for me and not my type. Plus, you’re my coworker.”
“I’m not your type?”
“No.”
“Describe Forest to me again.”
“He’s…” I stopped as the deeper intention of his question hit. Fuuuuuuck. I hadn’t even realized it until now, but Forest and Kaelan were very similar in build. Kaelan was taller and younger, but they otherwise shared a lot of physical characteristics. “You’re much younger than he is.”
Even I could hear how incredibly weak and pathetic that sounded.
“Yeah, keep telling yourself that’s the main difference.”
He wasn’t wrong, and that annoyed me more than anything else.
If they were so similar in build, why was I attracted to Forest and not to Kaelan?
I mean, the kid was hot, objectively speaking, yet he did nothing for me.
And it wasn’t because we were coworkers.
If I’d run into him somewhere else, I still wouldn’t have wanted to hook up with him.