Nemesync (Soulfound #1)

Chapter 36 – Zanae

36

ZANAE

W e’re back in the training room, Niko is in the ring with me, and I’m exhausted. For the past two hours, they haven’t let me take a break. I don’t even understand how they still have energy. I wasn’t in the Russian special forces like them. They train me as if I was in the military, and it’s tiring. But I try, I try until my body can’t fight anymore.

“Come on, little Z, you can do better than that.”

Breathing heavily, I respond in frustration, “I’m doing my best, Niko, really.”

Elijah watches closely; he’s been firm and cold since the beginning of today’s training. He’s just in that protective coach mode again. “You’re not pushing hard enough, Zanae. We need you to be faster, not tired.”

I forgot that part of him, the tough coach, but I know it’s just because he’s stressed for that mission.

I look at him annoyed. “I can do it. Just give me a moment, Volkov.”

“She’s pushing herself too hard, Elijah. Maybe we should ease up a bit.”

Elijah remains serious and doesn’t even listen to Niko. His gaze on me as he answers, even if I feel like it’s more for me than Niko, “She can handle it. She’s stronger than she thinks.”

Finally succeeding and putting Niko’s ass on the ground, I scream, “Got it! I did it!”

Elijah smiles weakly, for the first time today. “Good. Now, let’s move on to the next part.”

Exhausted, I collapsed next to Niko. “Oh no, can’t we take a break, Eli?”

“She needs to rest, Elijah. She’s pushing herself to the limit.”

He picks me up in his arms and looks at Niko. “Fine. We’ll continue tomorrow. Niko, I’m coming back for our session.”

He carries me to the showers; I can’t even walk.

The water runs, and he helps me take off my clothes as I get inside under his watchful eyes. He shampoos my hair, massages my scalp rhythmically, and my shoulders too, taking his time and following the little sounds that came out of my mouth everytime he hit a tensed knot.

He’s so patient with me…

After I’m done, he helps me get dry with a towel, kissing every red mark on my skin from the fights.

Gently and softly.

Each brush feels like a soothing remedy.

“You did well, Milaya . I’m proud of you.”

“Proud? I thought you were trying to kill me with that training,” I say, smiling as I lose myself in his eyes, in that softness I’m privileged to see because he offers it to no one else other than me.

“No, I want you alive and well. You need to be ready for anything. I prefer you tired now than dead there.”

I release a hesitant and tentative laugh, trying to dispel the charged atmosphere. I can feel his worry so clearly and loudly too and I want to reassure him, because I know that as long as I am with him, my safety is never a concern.

“Well, it felt like a near-death experience.”

He kisses my forehead tenderly, his large hands cradle my face in the manner of someone holding its prized possession, a trophy he owns and adores. “You’re stronger than you think, Zanae. I need you fully prepared.”

“I know. I just didn’t expect you to be so... intense about it.”

He tenses immediately. His beautiful green eyes darken, leaving trails of concern all over his pretty features.

He’s so beautiful. “I won’t risk losing you.”

“I understand.”

Elijah pauses, a sad smile touching his lips, and lets out a long relieved sigh. “You’re a weapon of war now, Zanae. My beautiful destructive weapon. I’m proud of everything you are.”

“The most beautiful weapon?”

He plants a soft kiss on my lips, smiling proudly, and adds, “The only one who could kill me, Little nightmare .”

His strong arms lift me gently after he has helped me get dressed in one of his hoodies and shorts and take me back inside. Niko is already inside the ring waiting for Elijah.

Their session is so intense; there’s blood and sweat. Now, I can feel their military entertainment. I mean they never fought in front of me. It’s like watching two beasts fighting.

Nikolai grins, his upper lip swollen and cut, “Elijah Volkov, I thought you said we were just sparring.”

“Sparring can be intense, Moretti. And I’ve wanted to punch you for so long now.”

“He’s got a point, Eli. Looks like Niko’s holding up pretty well against you. No need to kill him.”

“He’s good, but I have to make sure he stays sharp. He’s getting old.”

“I’m not old, we’re the same age, Elijah, and sharp? More like trying to crush me.”

He chuckles darkly and punches him again in the chest. “Shut up and take it, Niko, like a man.”

I smile and lean comfortably on the bench in front of them, admiring them. “I guess I should be glad I’m not in there with you two.”

Niko winks at me, with a devilish smile. “You wouldn’t last a minute, you little brat.”

He’s absolutely right. If I were in that ring with them right now, they would have wiped the floor with me. I don’t have an ounce of energy left, but I playfully feign offense and retort, “Excuse me? I could take you down, Nikolai Moretti. Don’t underestimate me.”

He laughs and shakes his head while Elijah affirms, “She’s right, she could stab you before you even see the blade. And if you touch her, I’m going to beat your ass again.”

A laugh escapes me as his green eyes lock onto mine from across the room, crinkling with a proud smile.

I never imagined that a powerful man like him could be so proud of his woman’s darkness, admiring her lethal nature, and savoring her deadly prowess instead of hiding it. He’s my biggest supporter, and my favorite one.

My Elijah is full of surprises.

They continue their sparring session, or rather, their murder attempts. Their movements are so precise yet so powerful. I watch them amused and full of admiration. Niko is really good; he’s strong and fast, and Elijah is another person when he’s fighting. It’s pure fury, violence, and perfection. And the anger in him is calm; that’s the scariest version of him I’ve ever seen.

After that we decided to stop by Miranda’s café. I told Niko about her involvement with the organization so he insists that she should go somewhere else for the mission. We want her to be safe with June somewhere else. We don’t know what the organization is capable of and I don’t want her to be here if anything goes wrong.

Entering the place, she spotted us, wiped her hands on her apron, and smiled. “Hey, what brings you here?” she asked, her warm smile turning into concern when she caught the serious expressions on my face.

I spoke up first, “Hey, can I talk to you for a sec?”

We were alone, away from the guys. “Listen, I need you to stay somewhere safe this week. Can you leave Vesper for a few days? The mission is coming soon, and if something goes wrong, I can’t risk having you around with June,” I said urgently.

“Of course,” she said, nodding and moving closer to me to hug me. “Be careful, Zee. Promise me you won’t get yourself into any trouble.”

I smiled reassuringly. “I promise. I’ll keep you updated.”

Returning my smile, she waved goodbye as we parted ways. We stepped outside, and I caught a car parked in front of us.

Through the tinted windows, the face of Elias Dellé, my father, could be seen smirking. My breath caught, and my eyes widened with shock.

Instinctively, Elijah and Nikolai positioned themselves between me and him. It had been so long since I had heard from him; he hadn’t called or texted me. He never tried to talk to me since my kidnapping months ago.

Stepping out of the car, his eyes filled with disdain.

He hates me so much, and no matter how hard I try to shake off the hurt, it never goes away, and it stings so painful.

“Look who we have here,” he sneered, his gaze fixed on me. “My shame of a daughter, accompanied by her protectors, the Venom Reapers. How charming is this.”

Elijah’s jaw clenched, and his eyes narrowed, Nikolai’s hand rested on my arm, stroking my skin, offering so much reassurance.

I struggled to catch my breath, repeating in my head, ‘ Breathe, Z, breathe. ’

“Zanae, you left for my enemies. You’re as stupid as I thought. It’s surprising you don’t even try to hide it. Did they promise you protection from your own father?” He laughed harshly. “You believed them and let them parade you around like a fucking trophy? Habibti , you’re such a disgrace.”

Elijah’s voice dripped with cold anger, a dark smirk playing on his lips. “You’ve got to be the most foolish person, stepping out of your hiding place just to pay us a visit when you’re well aware of how eager I am to end you with my own hands. And all this, on top of threatening your own daughter.”

Nikolai chimed in, his smile equally cold. “You’re testing us, Elias. Aren’t you?”

My father chuckled. “Protecting her won’t change the fact that she disappointed her whole family.. She’s going to pay for it one way or another. Kah’inah.”

My own father...

Traitor.

I was a traitor and I left my family to avenge myself.

Tears welled in my eyes, blurring my vision, and as soon as Elijah met my gaze, his eyes turned to ice. His hand left my back and the ghost of warmth he brought seemed so far away.

“You have no idea, Elias,” Elijah’s tone was low and serious. “If you dare to breathe the same air as her, I’m going to open your damn chest and burn you from the inside.”

“She’s my daughter, if I want to do something, I’ll fucking do it,” my father replied, taking a step forward. “ Habibti , come back home. Our family misses you.”

LIAR!

LIAR! FUCKING LIAR!

My head hurts. I know he just wants to use me again; he doesn’t miss me. No one does.

But for the first time in my life, I saw fear flicker in his eyes when Eli closed the distance between them.

“You see,” Elijah continued, his tone calm, “I’ve been to places and done things that would make the devil himself flinch for less than that, Elias. But, if I catch even a hint that you’ve laid a finger on her, your existence will become a living, breathing nightmare. I made you a promise.”

My father threatened back, “You’re threatening the Lebanese Emir, are you sure about that?”

Elijah chuckled, looking down at him, “Oh, I’m very sure.”

Nikolai spoke for the first time, “Consider yourself at war with the Zennites, Elias.”

My father looked like he was on the verge of exploding with frustration and fear, muttering incomprehensible words in a futile attempt to save face.

“One day, you’ll come back and help your family, just as a good daughter should.”

Never.

I was not his daughter. I was his weapon. His own instrument of chaos. But never his daughter

Breathe Z, breathe.

Elijah didn’t look back at us, his eyes locked with my father’s. “Disappear from her life and be grateful to her that you leave with your limbs intact.”

With a final dark look, Elijah turned away, gesturing for Nikolai and me to follow him. I barely felt Niko’s grip on my arm until he released it and guided me with a gentle hand on my back.

We left my father standing there alone, furious, frustrated, silent. It struck me then; how similar I had felt like this all my life.

Humiliated, frustrated and angry.

Elijah’s features softened facing me. He tenderly cupped my face, his thumb brushing away a stray tear. “Are you okay, Milaya ?”

I nodded, leaned into his touch and hugged him.

I hugged the man who was ready to do anything for me. I hugged the only home I found when I thought I could never escape my own head. Him . Elijah was my home.

“This is madness. Eli one minute ago you threatened to cut open Elias’s abdomen and now you’re casually hugging Zanae.”

Elijah shot him a cold look, but when he heard my little chuckle, his lips curved into a soft smile. “You’re fucking impossible, Niko.” he muttered.

“I never thought I could feel more drained than I did on that ring today. But leave it to my father to add a whole new level of exhaustion to my life.”

“Let’s get out of here.” Eli’s voice feels strained and consumed by anger.

I could feel his protective arm around me as we went to the car. During the ride, I was zoning out again, thinking about the mission, about my father, about everything.

The perks of being an over-thinker...

The memory of my father’s words is haunting.

I’m a disappointment to him, and I’ve always known it. Even though I was his best soldier, pursuing enemies who would forever be my own, and even risking my life on dangerous missions for him, he remained ungrateful.

But my new family was not like this.

They wanted to protect me, and I was forever grateful to have them in my life.

Is it okay for me to still hope for healing?

Is it realistic?

Elijah

Niko slept at the house yesterday. I have a room for him here, so when I woke up and found him drinking some coffee, Zanae at his side waiting for me with a little smirk, I knew they had an idea behind these cheeky smiles.

“You know where I want to go today, Elijah? See the little tattoo parlor you bought, where you did all yours and mine? I want to go there.”

I raised an eyebrow at the suggestion. “Again, Niko? You’re really tempting me to punch you.”

He grinned, “Listen, Eli, that little spoiled brat right here has been dreaming of getting a new tattoo, and you’re the perfect artist for the job.” He looked at my woman, and continued, “And she’s the one texting me every day about helping her get one from you.”

Her eyes sparkled with excitement, “True, I’d love to get a tattoo from you.”

She tilted her head to the side and gave me those damn eyes and I found myself unable to refuse her this.

“Please?”

I sighed and agreed, “Fuck, then let’s do it.”

It’s scary how much I’m willing to do for this woman. She could ask me anything and I would agree.

Entering the tattoo parlor, Niko looked around and winked at Zanae. “This is your first tattoo with Mr. Volkov, and he’s going to do it himself. Fancy .”

I didn’t know what I wanted to do exactly, I’ve always been the one giving myself most of my tattoos, in the Bratva it was normal to learn fast to do so. And growing up with Niko we’ve learned to always make one to commemorate things that we’ve done and accomplished.

But doing it on Zanae is something I didn’t know I needed until now. I’m going to mark her, something she can’t get rid of.

Sitting in the chair, Zanae’s grin was sparkling with excitement, “So, what’s it going to be?”

Nikolai teased me like the little shit he was, “I bet it’s going to be his initials right over your heart.”

I played along, “Not a bad idea, actually.”

“If that’s what he wants to do, I’m all for it.” Her eyes found mine as she added, “Make it big, make it ours.”

I leaned in and kissed her, “Relax for me, and just let me do this, Zanae.”

The parlor was all ours, we bought it years ago with Niko.

I shot a look to tell Niko to go out until I finished.

Zanae laid down on her stomach and took her shirt off to give me her back as my own canvas.

I couldn’t resist just leaning down and kissing every inch of visible skin. “You’re so soft.”

She arched her back so quickly and moaned. “Stop, Elijah. We’re here for a tattoo.”

My hand followed her spine and I turned her around to be welcomed by her beautiful breasts and tattoos. I pressed them together, touching what’s mine, playing with my favorite toy.

I planted small kisses everywhere I could reach, and smiled against her skin when she started gripping my hair and whimpering.

“I can give you a tattoo and an orgasm too, Milaya .”

She laughed and cupped my head to face me. “Give me one then.”

“Deal.”

I worked my way down her stomach and couldn’t help but kiss her curves. Our eyes locked, even if she was fighting to not close hers from pleasure.

My fingers slipped inside her jeans, brushing over her throbbing clit, feeling the heat and wetness there.

So sweet.

She shifted, parting her legs slightly.

“Make it quick, Elijah,” she whispered.

I leaned in, my breath burning against her ear, “Let me lock the door first.”

I walked over to the entrance and turned the lock with a small click. Then, I returned to her, trailing down her inner thigh with my fingers.

Her skin shivered, and her back arched instinctively.I started tugging down her jeans, as she helped me, lifting her hips, to slide them off.

A delicate piece of lace was the last obstacle to get my due. I hooked my fingers around it, slowly pulling it.

“Spread your legs for me,” I ordered, taking a step back to admire that view.

She obeyed and opened them slightly more. But it wasn’t enough.

“Wider, Zanae. I want to see what’s mine.”

Her legs stretched out and she laid there, naked, vulnerable and mine to use.

“That’s perfect.”

I moved my hands between her thighs, my fingers stroking her wetness gently to see her body at my mercy.

“So responsive, aren’t you?”

She moaned, her body shaking in response to my touch.“Elijah, I will scream.”

A laugh escaped me, “I’ll shut your mouth with mine then.”

I kissed her and at the same time I let one finger slide inside her, feeling her delicate cunt envelop me.

Her breaths were music to my ears.

“Shh, let me show you how I can kiss you and make you come at the same time.”

I started to move my finger in and out, slowly at first, then faster, watching her lose herself in pleasure beneath me. Every little moan coming from her I swallowed with my kisses. Her body arched so hard when I added another finger, stretching her. So tempted to add a third one to see how much of a good girl she was for me.

“Elijah, please, hurry up,” she murmured, biting my lips.

I kept my movements fast, my thumb grazing against her clit, “Such a greedy girl.”

She gripped the edges of the table, her eyes closed, her breathing ragged. “God! Eli…”

“Stop screaming to God when you’ve got the devil’s fingers stretching you out.”

Her whispered scream sounded heavenly. “I need to come, Elijah…” she demanded in a hurry.

My beautiful toy needed to let go. Desperately.

A smirk appeared on my lips, “Eyes on me, and I’ll let you come.”

She opened them again, her expression so demanding. So euphoric, so mine .

“Do you like having my fingers filling that tight pussy? Can you feel them claiming every inch of you, deeper and deeper each time?”

A dark promise invading my tone.

Maybe a menace. Certainly one. Because I owned her, entirely.

A desperate and frenetic nod, then a shake of her head. Silence. Her pupils blown wide, amber, fucking gold melting in those eyes.

I could feel her tightening around my fingers. Fucking delicious.

So I added a third one.

Her amber eyes widened again, burning with need. With arousal. With desire .

“Now,” thrust , “come,” thrust, “for,” thrust , “me.”

My voice sounded so husky and needy. And she heard it, she just grabbed my head and kissed me, letting out a muffled cry between our mouths, her sweet body convulsing under my hands, her juice coating my fingers.

I slowed my pace, letting her ride out her orgasm.

“Mark me,” she breathed urgently.

Without warning, I pulled my fingers out, slick with my woman’s arousal, and brought them to her plump lips. “First, suck,” I commanded, my eyes locked onto hers, a devilish flame in their depths.

And like my good own slut, she obeyed, taking them into her mouth, tasting herself, tasting the effect only I could have on her.

Those fucking soft lips enveloped my fingers, her eyes still on mine. Her pupils dilated further, darkness invading that honey color.

“I will mark you,” I replied, leaning down to kiss her one last time before really beginning the tattoo session.

“I can’t believe I let you do that to me here,” she laughed, getting back on her stomach.

She buried her face in her hands from shyness and I felt a rush of affection in my heart.

“I needed you to relax for this,” I murmured, planting a kiss on her shoulder and preparing the tools to begin the work. The needle touched her beautiful soft skin, and she winced.

“Zanae, it’s me, trust me and feel my hands on you.”

She nodded, and I continued.

In my mind, I wanted her to see that tattoo every day and feel how I see her—a force on her own, strong and fierce, the best thing that ever happened to me. My design was complex, but it was perfect for her.

Centered on her beautiful back was a delicate but dying dahlia flower. Encircling it, the crescent moon she already had that Luna gave her. Intertwined with the petals were scars, carefully etched on her skin, And the final touch, my favorite one, inscribed beneath the artwork is a quote from me to her: ‘ Zvezda Elidzhi ’.

My star and only mine.

What can I say? I love leaving my mark on her forever.

Niko came back to the room, hours later, leaning against a wall, he observed the scene with a smirk.

He looked at the tattoo while I sat next to her. “This is beautiful. I have never seen anything like this.” Then he chuckled when he read the quote and shook his head, “I knew you would leave something like that.”

Seeing my name carved into her skin was a twisted triumph. My obsession devoured it, and I felt an immense satisfaction watching it.

When the last stroke was done, I stepped back, examining my creation.

It’s exactly what I wanted her to see every-time she looked at herself in the mirror. I took off my gloves and let a small kiss on her neck where I could feel her pulse.

Divine .

She got up, putting on her shirt but lifted it up to see.

She admired the tattoo in the mirror, her eyes opened in surprise, then her gaze traced the quote underneath the dahlia, she turned to me with gratitude in her eyes. “That’s so beautiful Elijah. What does the quote mean?”

I left the tools on the table and went closer to her. I traced the curves of her back with my fingers and leaned near her ear, “It means that you’re mine.”

She turned toward me, her eyes filled with softness and magic, “You’re letting your mark on me?”

“Yes, I am,” I nodded.

She kissed my cheek, giggling, “Still a psycho, I see. But I love it, it’s stunning.”

I looked back at Niko and then at her, “Don’t make a habit of dragging me into tattoo parlors you two.”

Nikolai approached us, laughing, “Is the big and bad Elijah Volkov becoming a tattoo artist?”

“You stupid asshole, I’ve already given you a ton of tattoos.”

Niko offered me a gaze full of joy and with a smile he said, “You’re claiming Zanae forever now. That’s new, who would’ve thought.”

I planted a small kiss on Zanae’s lips, shaking my head.

After the tattoo session, I found myself standing outside, contemplative.

Zanae shot me subtle smiles while her hand, caressing my palm, rested in mine.

Nikolai nudged me, “Deep in thought, Volkov?”

“Take Zanae home, I need a moment. Keep her safe Niko, I’ll be back home late.”

“Everything okay, Elijah?” Zanae asked, her hand freezing on mine.

My gaze softened looking at all that worry in her eyes.

Fuck , how is she worried about me?

“Everything’s fine. Just need a moment, Milaya .”

Nikolai clapped me on the back and winked at me, “Alright, big guy. I’ll make sure she gets home safely. Take your time.”

I kissed Zanae one last time, her hand squeezed mine, like she wanted me to know she was here.

I don’t fucking deserve this woman.

Then they walked away, leaving me alone on the bustling street, I heard Niko whispering, “He loves his time alone.”

I shook my head and listened to Zanae’s chuckle as she answered, “Yeah, I’ve noticed, I live with him. But thanks, Niko.”

They headed towards the car, leaving me alone.

The tattoo machine’s hum filled the space as I prepared to mark a piece of my life onto my skin again.

A candid photo of Zanae lay before me. One I took when she was looking at me in the balcony, with her rosy cheeks and beautiful smile, those little dimples that speak directly to my heart. But mostly her amber gaze, illuminated by the moonlight.

These eyes hold the power to start wars and end them.

They killed me and kept me alive somehow. That rich honey color felt like home. Home for the broken and lost soul I am now, but also for the scared and lonely boy I was.

I took a deep breath, my fingers brushing over the image.

She got me, completely at her mercy, I’m hers, and I think I was meant to be hers even before I was on this earth.

The machine buzzed to life, I wanted to tattoo her gaze, the windows to her soul, the one she hates, the one I adore.

Each stroke of the needle felt like penance and absolution. I loved her eyes; they were magnificent and expressive, radiating a fire so vividly, they could burn down the world, my world .

Zanae had become a part of me in ways I never imagined.

I caught a sight of Benny’s hand writing on my chest. The day I almost died, Benny left a small note next to my bed, and I tattooed it.

‘Storms don’t last forever.’

Now, it did make sense.

Another tattoo joined her gaze marked on my forearm, the initials N, and Z soon etched over my heart, close to Benny’s words.

The process was fucking cathartic. Each prick echoed the beats of my heart, it wasn’t just about marking my body; it was about inscribing a proof that I survived.

I marked her, and I wanted her to mark me forever because what I felt was forever .

When I finished, I examined the artwork on my arm. Zanae’s eyes stared back at me. Now, I’ll always have her with me.

The initials on my heart served as a constant reminder of the only other person that found its place in my life. Niko is the only human being I always knew, the first person I’d die for and kill for, he’s my brother, and I wanted to make that to remind him that he’ll always be.

Benny’s words completed the whole process. Storms don’t last forever, and he was right. The chaos they bring leaves its marks, but eventually, calm returns, and you appreciate it so much more

Closing my eyes, a warmth spread through me, going beyond the ink on my skin, beyond the beating of my heart, beyond the thoughts in my head. It was quiet, but I could hear the rhythm of my breath changing, becoming lighter.

1-2-3. Gratitude.

4-5-6. Warmth.

7-8-9. Love

10 . A second chance.

I had finally found the other half of my soul. Finally.

I went back home feeling complete after that.

Entering the room, a small smile played on my lips as I observed the scene in front of me; Zanae, trying to retrieve her laptop from Niko’s grip.

Their laughter made the house come alive; she tried by all means to get it back from him and outmaneuver him, but Nikolai stood tall in front of her and held the laptop just out of her reach.

“I’m going to kill you, Nikolai Moretti! Give me my fucking laptop.”

Nikolai was laughing so hard at her trying to punch him in the stomach, “Or what, Little Z? You’re going to be angry and cry in Elijah’s arms like a baby?”

“I will cut your fingers and make you eat them.”

I couldn’t help but appreciate this side of this woman in front of me, that darkness that matches my own, so fiery, so fucking beautiful.

I leaned against the doorframe, smiling unintentionally. “Why would she call me, Niko?” I asked.

Momentarily distracted by me, Zanae seized the opportunity, snatching her laptop from Nikolai’s grasp. She held it up, shooting a victorious grin in his direction. “Got it!”

“Looks like she got you without my help.”

Nikolai shrugged but had this grin on his lips, “I’ll let her have this one. I’m a generous man.”

Zanae approached me and kissed my cheek before going back to the sofa, and Niko and I followed her.

My home never felt like home before, and now that it’s filled with laughter and trust, I realized I was witnessing something I never thought I’d experience when I was younger, the feeling of having a family of my own.

Noticing my persistence in keeping my jacket on, Zanae raised her eyebrow, “Volkov. Why are you still wearing your jacket? It’s pretty warm here.”

I seized the moment provided by Nikolai’s absence to take a call outside, and decided it was time to reveal my little surprise. With a subtle smile playing on my lips, I began to unzip the jacket, exposing the fresh ink on my arm.

Those big amber eyes widened in surprise as the tattoo came into view. It was hers; her eyes gazing back at her from my arm.

“What...?”

Softening my voice, I reached out to gently take her hand placing it on my heart, “I wanted to carry a piece of you with me, always.” I explained, my eyes locked onto hers. “I see my reflection in those eyes, and for the first time, I don’t hate it.”

She didn’t say a thing, and just traced the outline of the tattoo with her fingertips. I couldn’t even look anywhere else other than her face to see her reaction.

I hope she likes it, because I love it and I think it’s my favorite one.

I lift my shirt up and point to the ones on my heart, “This quote you love so much is a note that Ben left me one day when I thought I was going to die. Niko had his place here when he decided to become my friend from the day we were born. And you, my beautiful Little Nightmare , you’ve become an indelible part of me.”

Her existence marked me like a twisted burn on my soul. The life she brought into this world was my oxygen, making it surreal to think about how she made my madness feel magical.

Her eyes glistened as she took in the significance of the tattoo. She wrapped her arms around me, pulling me into a hug.

10 . Affection .

No words were needed, feeling her on me was enough for me to feel so good. Fuck, I am getting soft.

“You’re so talented, Elijah. It’s beautiful.”

I tilted my head when I saw her eyes watering, “I wanted you to know how much of my soul you took. I want you to see this every time I hold you when we sleep, every time I put my hand on your thigh when I drive, when I touch you. I want you to feel the power you have over me just by looking at this every time.”

“I want to kiss you so badly right now, Volkov.”

With a smirk, I leaned closer to her, “Show me how badly you want this.”

Her lips pressed immediately on mine. Her arms around my neck, legs parted around mine while she was sitting on my lap. My hands on her hips pushed her closer and closer, I fucking wanted her to enter my fucking skin. The moans she was leaving against my mouth made me so fucking eager of her.

“If you don’t stop moaning in my mouth, I’ll bend you over and fuck you without mercy with Nikolai in the other room, Zanae.”

She smiled at me, her lips swollen, her cheeks flushed, “We can’t do that, I sent a text to Nikolai a few minutes ago, He’s comi?—”

Talking about him, he just stormed in, interrupting her in the middle of her sentence, he swung the door open and practically charged in, eyes wide and mouth open. My beautiful girl, sitting comfortably on my lap, shot him a look full of anticipation and amusement.

“What do you want, Nikolai?” I grumbled, not that thrilled about the interruption.

But he was too wrapped up in his own emotional whirlwind to care about anything else. “Little Z told me about the tattoo! The initials, the eyes, the whole thing!”

This was fast, I didn’t even see her tap the text. These two are going to make me fucking crazy one day.

I just nodded. “Yeah, so what, Niko?”

He rushed over to us. Without any warning, he practically pulled her off my lap to get a better look at the tattoo. Zanae, with tears of laughter in her eyes, watched as Nikolai inspected the artwork like it was some priceless art in a museum.

His eyes widened even further, and he gasped dramatically. “ Eto velikolepno ! You’re turning soft on us! Now you got to ink me up too.”

Now with Zanae laughing beside me, I couldn’t hide a faint smile, I know how much he wanted us to do that, “I’m not getting soft, Niko. Just let me enjoy my moment, would you?”

Nikolai chuckled and threw his head back. “Never thought I’d see that day. Elijah, man you’re the Pakhan of the Bratva and you have my initials on you, I feel like dreaming right now.”

Zanae, still recovering from being tossed aside, chimed in, “Well, he did it for me, so I don’t want to be the one telling you that Niko, but maybe you need to calm down.”

Finally standing up straight, Niko looked at us with a dramatic gaze. “I need a moment to let this sink in. My best friend, getting all mushy with tattoos. I may get a tattoo of that day too, just under our initials.”

I shook my head, chuckling, “You’re stupid, Niko.”

Zanae couldn’t stop looking at the tattoo on my arm, “This is too beautiful.”

Not one to stay quiet when he felt left out, Niko added in a really offended voice, “Quite the dedication, having HER eyes on your arm, Elijah Volkov, don’t you think?”

I decided to stoke the flames of Nikolai’s jealousy, because fuck it amused me. “Well, you never asked me to get your eyes tattooed, Niko. I guess Zanae is just more persuasive.”

Nikolai placed a hand over his heart dramatically, “So, I see how it is. You get her eyes, she didn’t even ask you to do it, and I get a letter on your heart? After all these years of friendship? Even Benny got his own quote on your chest.”

Zanae sitting on my lap again, decided to join the fun, “Maybe you should’ve asked. Elijah is a man of many talents, but mind-reading isn’t one of them unfortunately. This one is mine.”

I added with a smirk, my hand on her arm, “Exactly. If you want something, speak up.”

Nikolai couldn’t help but smile looking at my chest again, “Fine, next time, I’ll send you a formal request in writing and all that shit.”

Zanae laughed, “Perfect, there you go, Niko.”

“Alright, I’m going to leave now. I think I may get the same tattoo tomorrow.” He gave Zanae a squeeze on the shoulder and a sarcastic flying kiss to me. “Bye, Brother.”

I chuckled before throwing him an amused side-eye. “Leave, Nikolai.”

“Drive safe, Niko!”

Once again alone in the house that had become our world, the unique place where we felt at home, where we found each other despite destiny’s attempts to keep us apart.

Zanae looked at me, her eyes curious and filled with warmth. “Why this?” she asked, tracing her fingers gently over the tattoo on her skin.

I took a moment, my gaze softening as I caressed her cheek. “I know how much this flower means to you,” I began, “When the dahlia fades, the petals are still magnificent, the color remain vivid for such a long time, they can bloom even in the worst conditions and still be the most beautiful flower, just like you flourish in this world who’s unworthy of you, Milaya . And each scar,” I continued, tracing the scars on her wrists, “these beautiful scars, that I love so much, tell a part of your story, of your life, a reminder of the strong soul you are. The prettiest and strongest soul my eyes have ever seen.”

Her beautiful amber eyes softened with understanding, and she leaned in to kiss me. “Thank you for everything, Elijah.” she said gently, snuggling against me. In that simple moment, I realized that while I might have a tattoo of her and her of me, she already carved her name on my heart and soul long before that.

Zanae

My phone buzzed as Elijah fetched dinner from the kitchen. A picture of shirtless Niko popped up in our group chat with Ben, Eli, and me, accompanied by the text:

Niko

I have my own now.

I giggled at the sight of the new tattoo on his heart, ‘E; Z; B’. Niko sported a grin in the photo, proud and happy.

Me

You’re insane.

A few seconds later, Ben’s text appeared,

Ben

Why the fuck am I at the end?

Niko

Because B is an ugly letter.

Ben

Yeah, like Z is any better.

Just as Elijah returned with our food and set it on the bed, I showed him the group messages, trying to hide my laughter. He grabbed his phone, and a new response popped up.

Elijah

You’re ugly, Ben. Z is beautiful.

Ben

Yeah, whatever. Where’s my Pakhan? Who’s this lovesick man? I’m sick of it.

I laughed and looped my arm through Elijah’s, glancing at him with a mischievous grin. We snapped a picture together, him holding me close, and I sent it with the text:

Me

My man, my Pakhan. Go away, Benny.

Elijah smiled and kissed my forehead. “That’s my girl,” he whispered.

He tucked his phone away, and I followed suit, ignoring the replies from Niko and Benny.

We ate and watched my favorite show and just before drifting off to sleep, I noticed the new wallpaper on Elijah’s phone—it was the picture I sent to the guys earlier.

“Aren’t you obsessed with me?” I teased, nodding toward the phone.

He simply tossed it aside before pulling me into his arms, whispering against my lips, “Madly, dangerously obsessed with you.”

I was too.

Madly, dangerously and obsessively addicted to him.

And it scared me.