Chapter Twenty
Jace
Fucking hell . Panic surged through me as I ran after Kayden. I stopped in front of Olivia and gently grabbed her shoulders, making eye contact. “I’ll be right back, Liv, I promise. Please wait for me. I don’t want him to leave like this.”
She nodded slowly as she searched my face.
As much as I wanted to be there for Liv, she wasn’t the one who needed me the most right now, and she wouldn’t run. I got to the elevator just as the doors were closing and I stuck my arm between them, causing them to stop and pop open again.
I shoved my way into the elevator car where Kayden stood in tears.
“Is this why you avoided me all week? You figured it out right away, didn’t you?” he said, shaking his head.
I gripped his shoulders and pulled him against my chest, wrapping him tightly in my arms as his body shook.
“I figured it out when you said you’d hooked up with her,” I said before kissing his temple and rubbing my hand up and down on his back. “I’m so sorry. I swear, I’ve been working on getting her to tell you all week, but she had to make that decision herself and she had to be the one to say it.”
He fisted my shirt in his hands as his body silently shook against mine and I sighed in relief that he wasn’t pulling away from me. I kissed the side of his head again. “I understand if you’re mad at me, I won’t ask you not to be. Just please let me be here for you,” I said.
He wrapped his arms around my waist as the elevator settled into the lobby.
I pulled the emergency break, keeping us contained until he was ready.
I rubbed his back for several minutes as he slowly calmed his breathing.
He pulled away and stepped backward until his back hit the elevator wall and he sank to the ground, wrapping his arms around his knees.
He sat there for a minute, staring at the ground before he finally looked up at me.
“How long have you known my daughter?” he asked, lifting his glasses and wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.
I sat down on the floor in front of him and crossed my legs, leaving him space while also being close enough in case he decided he wanted to reach me.
“From the beginning,” I answered honestly. “I met Liv just before she found out she was pregnant. We became close, and I went to her apartment to meet Kaylee the day they came home from the hospital.”
His eyes searched mine as he asked his next question, “Have you and Olivia ever been together romantically?”
“No,” I said. I ran a hand through my hair and silently vowed never to keep anything from him again. He deserved the truth. The whole truth. “I’ve been in love with for her for years but I’ve never told her.”
“Why not?”
“Honestly? Mostly because I’ve been a coward.
I love Kaylee so much, she might as well be my daughter too.
If I told Liv how I felt and she didn’t feel the same and it cost me that little girl?
I don’t know how I’d ever live with myself if I just disappeared from her life like that.
Being without Liv and Kaylee just isn’t an option. ”
Kayden nodded slowly and took a deep breath, adjusting his glasses.
“What’s Kaylee like?”
I chuckled. “God, Kayd. She’s so smart. She already knows all of her letters which her new preschool teacher was beyond impressed with.
She carries books around everywhere. She’s super into MANGA-TILES and builds pretty elaborate structures out of those things.
She gets most upset with Liv when she isn’t allowed to pick out her own clothes, and she is a world-class cuddler during movies.
Oh, and she has a new obsession with her ant farm. ”
His lips turned upward. “She sounds pretty awesome.”
“She’s so awesome.” I reached out with my foot and gently nudged his. “Honestly, she’s kind of brilliant. I’ve never met a kid her age this advanced and now I think I know where she gets it from.”
He chuckled and the sound made my heart skip a beat.
“I wanted to tell you, Kayd, but I couldn’t do that to Liv, and I couldn’t push her without revealing our relationship, especially not when seeing you was a huge shock for her too.
I’m not saying that as an excuse, I just want you to know that I did my best to keep your secret too. Though I’m sure she’s suspicious now.”
He reached for my hand, and I inched a little closer to him. “That must have felt like an impossible position,” he said, rubbing his thumb over mine. “No wonder you look so tired.”
I snorted. “I really did work myself to death to avoid seeing you and pestering her anymore than I already was. I didn’t want to be with you while I was keeping something like that to myself.
She promised to tell you today, and I know she would have.
I have no idea how Kaylee ended up here, but I know that wasn’t how she planned to tell you.
Olivia’s a really good person. She’d never ambush you. ”
“Jace, I appreciate your loyalty to both of us over the last week more than I can explain. And I’m sorry because what I’m about to say is going to make you feel worse.” He sighed. “She knows I’m bi.”
“Fuck,” I groaned, grabbing my hair with both hands.
Kayden pulled me closer, and I moved to sit beside him. He rested his head on my shoulder and I slipped my arm around his waist. “I told her the night we met. She may not recall a detail that small, but I remember it vividly because she was the first person I ever told.”
My heart worked its way up my throat. They had a real connection, didn’t they? I’m so fucked.
“I don’t want you to have to lie to her for me,” Kayden said, pulling my mind from spiraling the drain. “You can tell her about us.”
I nodded against his head. “Okay. Honestly, I’m just glad there’s still an us.”
He lifted his head and faced me. “I’m falling for you, Jace. I can’t walk away from you. Especially not when you were clearly hurting over this all week.”
I kissed him deeply. “Good, because I’m not going anywhere, baby.” He kissed me again and I cupped his face. “Do you want me to come home with you? I need to check on Liv and make sure that she and Kaylee are okay. I can meet you at your place afterward.”
“No,” he said. “I think I need a little time alone to let this sink in. You should make sure she’s okay.”
“Okay,” I said reluctantly as we both shifted to standing. “You can call me though. If you change your mind and don’t want to be alone. I’ll be there if you want me.”
“Thank you,” he said wrapping his arms around me in a hug. I pressed my lips to his one last time, released the emergency hold on the elevator, and waved goodbye as he stepped into the lobby.
When the elevator opened back into my office space, I spotted Olivia sitting at her desk with her head in her hands. I went straight to her and put a hand on her upper back. “Where’s Kaylee?” I asked.
“She’s in your office still. I needed a few minutes.”
I pulled her up to standing and wrapped her in a tight hug.
“You ran after him,” she said, her voice shaky.
“I did.” I had no idea how to wrap my head around my feelings for these two people, not when they were both in need of support for a reason far beyond my relationship with either of them. Helping them through this was more important to me than sorting that out just yet.
“Why?” Liv asked, pulling back to look at me.
“I think you know why,” I said, brushing the hair that clung to her wet cheeks off her face.
She looked at me sadly. “Is he as good of a guy as I think he is? As I need him to be?”
“Yes,” I said confidently.
She sighed and seemed to relax at my assessment. “I really liked him,” she said. “If things had been different, I would have told him about her. I wasn’t trying to keep Kaylee to myself and Kayden meant something to me.”
“I know, Liv,” I said.
“Do you think he’ll forgive me?”
“I think he needs time to process, just like you did. I don’t think he’s going to blame you for not tracking down someone you knew nothing about.”
She nodded and wiped her cheeks, standing up straight. “Well, this was not how I wanted to tell him, but at least he knows. I guess the next step is up to him.”
I took in a breath through my nose. “It is, but you also need to decide how you want to handle whatever he wants next. Eventually he’s going to want to meet her, Liv.”
She nodded and fingered her nose ring. “Then I guess I’ll start making peace with that.”
“I’ll be right here, just like I promised,” I said, squeezing her hand.
“For me or for him?” she asked sadly.
“For all of you,” I said, pulling her into another hug. I held her close for several minutes before she stepped back.
She opened her mouth to speak but before she could Kaylee came out of my office with a sigh. “I’m hungry. I want to go home.”
“Let me take you both out,” I whispered to Olivia.
She nodded imperceptibly.
“Let’s go get pizza!” I said, forcing enthusiasm into my voice for the little girl I wanted to protect from this for just a little bit longer.
“Yeah!” Kaylee yelled.
“Thank you, Jace,” Liv whispered.
I put my arm around her shoulders and gave her a side hug. “I’m not going anywhere, Liv.” I kissed the side of her head. “Let me go get my stuff.”
I forced myself to let go of the last thirty minutes as I ran to Kaylee and lifted her up on my shoulders while she giggled loudly, blissfully unaware of how much her life was about to change.
I set her down and grabbed my coat off the back of my office door, shrugging it on and realizing that I’d just made Olivia and Kayden the exact same promise.
I meant it. I’m incapable of letting either of them go, even if I have no idea what that means for all of us.