Chapter 28
28
Nick
“Are you trying to kill him?” Natalie’s mom shouts at me like I’ve never heard from anyone before. This is a mother protecting her family, a wife protecting her husband from an attacker. From me, which makes no sense. “Leave us alone!”
“Mom,” Natalie says with horror changing her tone. “Why are you yelling at him?”
Shit.
I leave Jackson on the sidewalk as I run to get Natalie out from the middle of this mess. With my hands up in surrender on approach, I say, “I can explain, Mrs. St. James. Please, just let me?—”
Ignoring me completely, Martine homes in on her daughter. “Natalie, if it weren’t for them, your dad wouldn’t be here. He was fighting for us, for you, and look where he ended up.” She grabs Natalie and pulls her behind her, using her body as a wall between us. “Get away from us, or I’ll call the police.”
“You don’t understand.”
“I understand everything. It was a good deal that wasn’t good enough for you. I won’t let you come near my daughter again, or my son.” Her eyes glance behind me. “Jackson.” It’s one call of his name that has him right there when she needs him.
I plead with the only case I have left. “She doesn’t know, Mrs. St. James.”
Shaking her head, she says, “What are you saying?”
Natalie moves to her side but then comes to stand next to me. My gut twists that she’s defending me when she doesn’t have the facts. Her mom’s eyes narrow. “What are you doing, Natalie? You can’t be serious?”
Taking my hand, she nods. “I love him.”
Blinking in disbelief, her mother takes a few steps back and then looks at her son for an ally. “Tell her. Tell her what she’s choosing. Tell her who these people are and what they’ve done to your father.”
Looking at me and then to his mom, Jackson says, “Mom?—”
“Tell her!” When he fails her, she says, “Listen to me, Natalie. We sold the company to them because we trusted them to treat our companies and clients like family. But they only care about business. The contract stated they were to keep all staff and support other company interests.” She moves closer again, trying to convince her daughter that I’m the devil. She jabs her finger in the air in front of me. “But these people broke that agreement when they threatened to dissolve the assets of your company.”
My hand is dropped, and Natalie stands there unblinking. Jackson covers his mother’s shoulder and tries to pull her back. “Mom, I think we should give Nick a chance to explain.”
“He’ll put poison in her ear while her dad tries to recover. I can’t trust him, and neither should you.” Their mother is too wound up, too angry, too emotional over her husband understandably, and looking for someone to blame. I want to butt in, to tell my side of the story, to make them understand I would never go against my word, especially where Natalie’s concerned. But what can I say that will have her believing me over her own mother?
Natalie looks at me again and then steps closer, her hands so light, not taking any ownership like she usually does, as they touch my chest. “Tell them they’re confused, Nick. You’d never hurt me or my family.”
I stand in my own agony, not wanting to turn her against the family that she’s telling me I’d defend. I would. I will . . . but why do I have to sacrifice the thing I cherish more than anything else in this world? We’ve barely had enough time to launch into a new life together.
Against my better judgment, my gut tells me not to reveal more than they have already.
“I wouldn’t hurt or betray either.” Such admissions should come easier. The words on the surface are a good thing, but buried inside the syllables is a confession that I’d give her up to keep her at peace with her parents. I lower my head while taking her hands and holding them against my stomach. Her fingers are so delicate, her wrists small. Everything about her is so breakable, even the parts of her I can’t see on the outside, like her heart.
Is that what I’m doing? Breaking hearts because one of us will lose. It’s me or them, so I choose to hurt myself over this beautiful woman before me.
She turns back to her mother, the same plea still residing in her eyes. “I trust him implicitly. Nick would never hurt me.”
Her mom replies, “Ask him. Ask him who bought the company. Ask him who sat in our offices and promised to treat our business like it was a part of their family. Ask him, Natalie, if he went back on his word and cut loans from the portfolio that he said he would leave alone.”
My love, my reason to exist, spins in confusion until she’s facing me again. “Tell her she’s wrong. There’s been a misunderstanding.” When I don’t say anything, she fists my shirt. “Tell her, Nick. Tell her how much you love me,” she demands, raising her voice. “Tell her,”
“I can’t.”
Her lips part, but I don’t think she’s breathing. I take hold of her waist to keep her from leaving, but her body slowly slips through my hands. “What do you mean you can’t? You love me, remember?”
“I remember, and I do. I love you so much, baby, but?—”
“But what?”
Martine starts crying. “What are you doing, Natalie? You’re choosing him over your own family. Over your dad, who would do anything for you?”
Natalie is drawn to look at her, to see the anguish on her face. Trapped between the two of us, she replies, “I was going to marry him.”
The tense has the most impact, gutting me. I ask, “Was?”
“Am,” she corrects, her nerves getting the better of her as her voice begins to tremble. “Mom, Nick?—”
“Christiansen,” her mother adds. “Legal Counsel for Christiansen Wealth Management. Son of Corbin Christiansen, third in line of succession to CEO.”
I’m stunned to the spot hearing my résumé thrown out like it was a memorization project. But Natalie furrows her brow and asks, “How do you know all of that?”
Other emotions have drained from her face, and now just the anger remains. “Christiansen Wealth Management now owns Manhattan Financial and STJ Co. But you might want to check in with your boyfriend because they’re cutting funding to your company by ending that part of the deal.” The mic wasn’t laid down. It was dropped like a ten-ton weight on top of my chest. She walks back to the hospital, the sliding glass doors opening as if commanded.
Jackson eyes me, and then says, “Good luck,” before heading into the hospital.
But Natalie remains, standing there watching cars come and go from the ER entrance farther down the sidewalk. I’m not sure what to say, and I’m thinking Natalie feels the same way. The truth will find a way, but I have to take the first step to fix the damage. I say, “She’s right. CWM bought Manhattan Financial. But she’s wrong when she says I betrayed you. The truth is that I didn’t put the pieces of the puzzle together. Not until today, and then it was too late. You were there with my family. You heard me assume your last name was as common as Smith in New York City.”
“It’s not.”
“I know. Now, I know.”
“My dad and mom started that company thirty years ago. They put everything into it. I can’t believe they were selling it when it was still so successful.”
“I only got some of the information, but your parents wanted to retire. We wanted a place with a good reputation to help with our presence in the city. It was a good match and an easy deal to close because both sides were eager.”
She turns her back to me as she stares into the minimal landscaping outlining the side of the hospital. Crossing her arms over her chest, she asks, “Why wouldn’t they tell me?”
“I don’t know, Natalie.”
She peeks at me from over her shoulder. “I don’t know what to believe or who to listen to. All I know is that my father could have died tonight, and from the sounds of it, you’re partially responsible.”
“I—”
“No.” A wall is built, her hands standing guard to keep me from reaching her. “This is too much to digest. I think it’s best if you leave, Nick. I’m going inside to be with my family.” She doesn’t kiss me, and there are no warm embraces. When she walks away, I’m left in the cool fall air with nothing but the memory of her looking at me like I’m the enemy.
“I didn’t know.” But these people broke that agreement when they threatened to dissolve the assets of your company. When I met with Dad earlier, yes, he was fighting for the best deal, but surely, he wouldn’t be underhanded and screw them over. He said he’d keep that business, her business, if he was forced to. Did he lie to me? What am I missing?
She stops with her back to me. There are no ocean blue eyes to swim in or even a small smile to indulge my ego. She gives me nothing before the sliding glass doors open and then engulfs her.
I watch her through the glass, her family opening their arms and taking in one of their own.
But she’s become my family as well, but now, I don’t know where we stand with each other, other than with glass doors between us.
We may not have had a long relationship, but I knew the minute I saw her on that New York street that I wouldn’t let what happened in Catalina repeat itself. And I didn’t. Until now, when I have to let her be and hope she comes back to me.
Sitting outside the hospital, I don’t dare go inside. Natalie needs this time with her family, and I’ll respect that. But after three hours of waiting on this bench with the chill of October setting in, I’m starting to fear that Mr. St. James is not out of the woods.
She might have told me to leave, but no way am I going anywhere. I can only hope that she knows I’m here if she needs me.
After speaking with Jackson, he seemed to understand and believed me. I hate that my entire future hinges on whether he can be a voice of reason for Natalie.
Just before midnight, I hear the doors slide open and see Natalie coming my way. I stand away from the bright lights of the hospital, hoping to find privacy from other people here for the hospital.
She says, “It’s dark.”
“Yeah, shortly after we arrived.”
She shoves her hands in her pockets and then finally gives me the view of her deep blues. “You should go home, Nick.”
My heart sinks, my hope of speaking to her tonight falling with it. “Can we talk?”
“No. Not tonight. I don’t have enough energy to spare on . . .” She angles away from me as if the sight of me is too much. She sniffles but swipes at her cheeks before peering up at me again. “I don’t know what to believe, Nick, but there’s no reason for you to stay.”
“You’re my reason for staying, Natalie.”
She crosses her arms over her chest, keeping an impartial face. “That’s not good enough anymore.”
Staring at her, I lose my words in the sliver delivered to my heart. “Love is enough.”
“Not our kind.”
“What kind of love are we?”
“The hopeless kind, star-crossed and tragic.” I hate how definitive she makes it sound.
“I didn’t know it was your family. I swear to God.”
“You knew!” Rage roars through her. She slams her fists against my chest. “You knew, and you used me. You lied to me about everything.” I’m hit again, but this time, she pushes so hard that she ends up stumbling backward. “And for what? A better deal? Well, that didn’t happen, so move on without me.”
When I reach out to catch her, she smacks my hand. “Don’t you touch me. Not ever again.” The anger in her eyes freezes me to the spot, and she screams, “That’s why you wanted to marry me, isn’t it? Isn’t it?” Disgust reaches her eyes before I can answer and she adds, “You knew I’d leave you, so you thought you’d play that card. You must be pretty damn proud of yourself for tricking me.”
“It wasn’t a trick. There were no tricks or lies despite what your mom has been telling you.”
Shock rips through her expression. “Are you calling my mom a liar?”
“No, I’m not, but this isn’t black and white. She’s in the gray area of understanding this situation like I am. I didn’t know about your company. I had no idea that your family owned Manhattan Financial. I swear I didn’t fucking know.”
“I’m going to lose my company, Nick. How the hell could you not have known? You met with my parents. You heard me talk about STJ more than once since we found each other in New York. With the damage already done, where did you really think that would leave us?”
I move in as close as she’ll let me, which isn’t close enough for my liking. “We’re still in love. We still have each other to rely on. We are still us. Don’t let the lies win, because I don’t think what you’ve heard is correct. My father doesn’t do business like that. He’s?—.”
“Enough.” She covers her forehead with her hand, and says, “I’m such an idiot for trusting a guy.” Agitation sets in as she stares at me like she never knew me at all. “I wish I would have kept walking.”
I reach out to touch her, but she moves away from my hand. “Then you’d be on a date with Chad?—”
“At least Chad didn’t lie to me.”
“Neither did I, Natalie. I know there’s a lot going on. You should spend time with your dad and not think about anything else. We can talk when you’re rational.”
“Rational?” she scoffs, planting her hands on her hips. “Wow, Nick. You know what? I’ll never be rational enough to believe the lies you’ve been feeding me. My eyes have been opened to your deceptive practices.” She walks backward. “Take Manhattan Financial and STJ Co. It’s yours to do as you please just like you wanted all along, but if you care about me at all, then leave me alone.” She turns her back on me and storms toward the hospital.
“I’ll go to a hotel?—”
Turning around, she calls back, “I don’t mean just for the night, Nick. I mean forever. There’s no way I can be with someone like you.”
“Like me? What does that mean?”
“Someone who cares more about business than people.”
I hate that I’m defending business decisions I didn’t make. “Your father?—”
Whipping around, she points at me. “My father is fighting for his life because he was fighting for me. Against you!” Although plenty of sidewalk stretches between us, I feel the jolt of her words.
Before the doors open for her, I say, “Natalie, I haven’t lied to you. I won’t lie to you. I’ll leave the hospital now, but please let me find out the truth and then sort this out. I love you.” Forever.
This can’t be it.
We can’t be over.
She never breaks her stride, and I’m left with the remains of what could have been. I’m left dumbfounded with no clear answers to how this turned so quickly into the destruction of us.
I feel as blindsided as she does. My dad is an unscrupulous businessman, but would he so deliberately deceive a business owner in a deal? Is that how he does business? There’s no getting around my role in this mess, and my intentions don’t matter. I can be mad all I want or place the blame elsewhere, but the bottom line is that I’m an attorney. My job literally requires me to read contracts. I was so busy worrying about the threat of having to move to Seattle that I lost sight of what was happening in LA and New York. How could I have let something this important slip through the cracks?
And now, the woman I love is in the hospital by her father’s bedside, with not only fear for her father, but the reality that her pride and joy was insolvent as of five o’clock. Will be, thanks to my signature.
Fuck.
I leave like she wants me to, rounding the block to find a taxi waiting. With my hand on the door handle, I debate if I should go or barge in and let her know that I’m here for her. I open the door and get in because I know the truth. She doesn’t want me anywhere near her at this time. I head to the hotel, getting an odd look from the desk clerk. Especially when I don’t have any luggage. Well, I don’t feel like I have anything at the moment, so this is fucking fitting.
Once in the room, I start the shower with Natalie’s words still rattling around my brain. I’ll respect her wishes tonight—she’s exhausted, so I’ll chalk it up to that—but tomorrow, I hope she’ll see me, and we can talk calmly. God, I hope her father pulls through. He has to make it.
And so do we.
As I’m learning, a life without Natalie is no life to lead. Surely, once she knows the truth and we get her company back on track with new funding, we’ll be okay.