No Love Lost (No Fail Heroes #4)

1. Lose Your Head

CHAPTER 1

Lose Your Head

H eath Wilcox stared out his condo window at the rain misting down and wondered what was wrong with him.

He’d established the business of his dreams. He loved helping start-up companies become successful. It was gratifying to use his expertise in the financial world to help others. The team he’d hired was smart, savvy, and fun. The job was interesting, and different every day. He owned this great condo overlooking Boston Harbor, and had enough money to meet his needs.

Yet all he wanted to do was run away from home.

Okay, that was dramatic, but it was essentially true. His buddy, Troy Phail, was bugging him to join him and several of their other military teammates in Vermont.

Phail , Vermont to be exact.

Troy wanted him to leave his condo, his view, his family, and come to a tiny town with a ridiculous name in Vermont. For Christmas, at the very least. Forever if Troy had his way.

Epic, Troy’s call sign from their military days, was stupid happy and in love. He figured the town’s magic might work on Heath, too.

Surprisingly, it had for two of their fellow teammates, Falcon and Oz. And while Arrow didn’t have the stupid-happy glow of the other three, the four of them were constantly playing up the town. And how much they needed him for their new venture. The venture they wouldn’t tell him anything about.

Which was exactly as annoying as it was effective.

Their other buddy, Scooby, was mostly incommunicado, but Heath did want to see his army friends. This time of year sucked without family around. Well, his parents were around but their idea of Christmas was a catered meal where no one talked about anything of substance, but appearances were maintained.

He’d never had much in common with his parents. They were all about money, making money, and shoving their privilege in the faces of anyone not so lucky.

Heath missed his grandparents desperately. They’d been his role models from an early age. Every part of Boston included memories of them. Over the years, they’d taken him on hundreds of walks around all the Boston neighborhoods. He loved visiting the pockets of the city where his favorite people had met and fallen in love. The fountain where Gramps had snuck his first kiss. Their favorite pizza joint. The harbor below him where Gramps had proposed.

Money had been tight for them in the beginning, and they’d spent most of their dates walking the city, meeting new people, and enjoying the sights. They’d dreamed big dreams. Many of them had come true.

They’d influenced every part of Heath. All the good parts, anyway. He’d bought this Seaport condo because that’s the view Grams had liked best. Every time he looked out, he thought of Gramps proposing right there.

Even after they’d had money to spare, they’d gone on their Boston dates. He’d joined them on many of them. Especially the Christmas ones where they’d taken him to see the lights and taste all the treats. He was lonely for them and their advice. He wanted to discuss his discontent, and have them help him figure out next steps. But he was alone.

Which made Christmas in a tiny town named Phail actually sound appealing. Or he was losing his mind.

The holidays were still a few weeks away and Heath didn’t have any plans at the moment. His parents hosted a few events but he wasn’t in the habit of attending many of those.

A few women had hinted they’d love to spend the holidays with him, especially if he wanted to whisk them away to some exotic locale.

The only women he seemed to encounter these days were interested in him for things other than who he was. His bank account and his family name didn’t define him, and he was tired of people assuming they did.

This time of year had him nostalgic for the type of family he’d never had. A fun and boisterous group who laughed and teased and bickered. A group who had your back but kept your ego in check at the same time.

He wanted a life filled with that. A woman who fit right into that picture.

A woman like Addy.

Except she hadn’t wanted him. She’d cut him out of her life after he’d joined the military. Never returned even a single one of his calls, texts, or emails.

He hated that his parents had turned out to be right about her. Not about her not being worthy. Addy had been amazing and brought out the best in Heath and everyone else she encountered. But they’d been right about her not being as invested in the relationship as he’d been.

Heath wished he could say that after a dozen years it didn’t bother him anymore, that he’d stopped wondering why. But it still nagged him in the middle of the night. Sure, they’d only been seventeen, but they’d been madly in love. Or he had. Apparently, the feeling hadn’t been mutual.

Once again, the itch to search her name online scratched at his brain. He’d looked years before, and had found nothing. He shut down the urge. She hadn’t wanted him. He hadn’t been enough. The last thing he needed to see was her smiling face with a Mrs . attached to the front of her name.

Her almost-black eyes and those gorgeous cheekbones showcased her Ojibwe heritage. The sparkle that he’d often been the only one allowed to see. She’d been quiet and reserved—a direct result of the tough life she’d survived. Beneath that reserve lay a beautiful soul full of love, strength, and creativity.

Heath blew out a breath and shoved his hands through his hair. He needed to push memories of Addy back into a box. He’d agonized enough over her through the years.

Today’s dilemma was much simpler.

To Phail or not to Phail?

Even phrasing it that way in his head had him smiling. Probably why Epic didn’t want to change either his surname or his town’s name.

Heath’s phone beeped, and he moved to the kitchen where he’d left it. Of course, it was from Troy because that’s the way the universe worked some days.

The text was a photo showing Troy, Sean, Levi, and Marcus clinking beer bottles with the caption Wish you were here .

Shaking his head at the universe, he tossed the phone back on the counter. With the mood he was in, he wasn’t ready to talk to anyone. He’d make himself some food, and maybe that would help him make some decisions.

He pulled out some chicken, pasta and tomatoes, then the phone beeped again.

This text was from Levi. We miss you, man.

He didn’t answer it either. When he was draining the pasta, it beeped again. Sean. You can do your job from anywhere. Bring your laptop.

He’d plated the meal when Marcus’ text came through. We need your specialized skill set for a project. Let’s get the team together again.

Damn it. They were pushing all the buttons. Cutting off his work argument. Reminding him they were the family that mattered. They knew about his strained relationship with his parents, and how much he missed Gramps and Grams. Now, they were hinting at a secret project they’d conjured up. Without him.

Because he wasn’t in Phail.

Heath ate his meal, keeping one eye on the sports scores and the other on his phone. He knew they weren’t done. And he knew that because they hadn’t got their way yet.

Were they going to get their way?

With a chuckle, Heath realized they probably were. But he had no intention of telling them that. Certainly not tonight when his emotions had been ping-ponging all over the condo.

It was already December, but when he looked around his place, he realized he hadn’t put up a single thing to denote the holiday. Was that because he was a man who hated to decorate? Or because he wasn’t ready?

Or was it because he’d decided this wasn’t where he was going to celebrate the holiday?

His phone beeped again, and he finished his last lonely bite before he looked at it.

This one was a video. Heath pressed play and immediately laughed. His friends were grinning at him. Like they knew he’d been avoiding their calls.

Marcus spoke first. Arrow had been their military team leader and was the steadiest man Heath knew. “Hey, Slick. We need your brain.”

Levi, never one for a ton of words, nodded. “Get your ass to Phail.” Oz was a farmer at heart and always got straight to the point.

Sean laughed and slapped Levi on the shoulder. “Oz’s right. We need you, man. You and Scooby. We’ve got a room all ready for you.”

Troy grinned. “So stop ignoring us when we know perfectly well you’re in that condo all by yourself. Get your ass up off the chair and start packing. We’ll see you soon, Slick.”

The four of them grinned and then chanted in unison. “Come to Phail. Come to Phail. Come to Phail.”

The video cut out and Heath realized he was laughing right along with them.

He did the only thing he could do in the situation. He got his ass up off the chair and started to pack.

A ddison Syrette jumped out of her chair when the buzzer sounded. The buzzer that meant she’d ignored the first two timers. Again.

She laid her hand over her heart to help slow its beating. That heart had been through enough crap in its time, and she needed it to keep working for a few more decades.

Addison forced herself to save and back up her work from a standing position. If she sat back down, she’d get swept up in her story again and miss picking up Nina.

Of course, her daughter would simply laugh and go into Phail General or Phail Phoods to wait. Or she’d call Nimii to pick her up instead. Her twelve-year-old was one hundred percent reliable, and Addison tried desperately to live up to her example.

Because she’d missed the first two timers, she rushed through her shower, grateful for the new hot water heater. She chose actual clothes instead of the flannel pajamas she’d been wearing. She’d have to switch out the polar bear slippers for socks and boots. Not nearly as comfortable but actually acceptable for going out in public. Never her favorite thing.

She was very lucky her love of words had turned into an actual talent that paid for the roof over their heads and all the other bills. That hadn’t always been the case, and there’d been far too many years when they’d only survived because of the kindness of others.

With her blog and her books, she had even started a small savings account alongside Nina’s college fund. A dream she’d often thought outside the realm of possibility. She was going to make sure that Nina had every opportunity she wanted. The girl deserved the moon and then some. No matter what college she chose to attend, Addison would make it work.

And she wouldn’t even panic because she knew she had the skills to support them. And friends. True friends who would always be there for her and Nina. Friends who wouldn’t turn their backs on them.

Unlike Nina’s father.

How could anyone not want that girl? She was magic. Curious and smart. Interested in everything. Kind and loving. With enough boldness, sarcasm, and grit inside to keep things interesting. Nina wouldn’t be the type to hide in shadows.

Despite the tough times, Addison wouldn’t change a single thing about her past. All of those events, all of those choices, had brought her Nina.

Even the soul-shattering pain of Heath walking away from her without so much as a goodbye was worth it because their daughter was an incredible human being.

And if Addison didn’t hurry, she was going to be late. There wasn’t enough time to dry her hair properly, but she aimed the blow dryer at it with one hand while she pulled on leggings and an oversized sweater. In deference to the temperature, she pulled on fuzzy socks, too.

With her asthma, keeping the cold air outside of her body was a priority. She wouldn’t take chances with Nina, and that meant protecting herself. So she tucked her wet hair into the polka-dot fuzzy hat Nina had made during her knitting phase. Then she wrapped the matching scarf around her neck, pulled on her jacket, and slipped on her boots. At the last second, she remembered her inhaler and mittens. At least the keys were where she always hung them. She still had no idea where the other set had gone.

Of course, she hadn’t remembered to start the car in her rush. There wasn’t any fresh snow to brush off, so she hopped in and hoped for some semblance of hot air to come from the heater. One day, she’d need to break down and get a newer vehicle, but Wabi had served them well. This was the first year the heater had given them problems, but she’d need to get it repaired soon.

She patted the dash with her mittens. “Okay, Wabi . Let’s go get Nina.” When they’d bought the well-used Camry, Nina had been learning her Ojibwe color words and hadn’t been able to say waabishkaa , the word for the color white. The car had been Wabi ever since.

Addison pulled out of their drive, happy that she hadn’t had to shovel. That would have definitely made her late. It was still weeks until Christmas, but Vermont never minded letting her people know that winter was always around the corner.

Their tiny house wasn’t in Phail itself, but on the northern outskirts, out in farm country. At some point, her property had been part of the Adamson farm. That family had sold off several smaller sections for homes. Jonas Adamson still lived in the large farmhouse on the main property. After his mother’s death, he was the only family member left.

Real estate in Phail itself wasn’t expensive but her home had been about half the going rate because it hadn’t been in the town proper. The day she’d been able to afford it and move out of the home her friend Nimii shared with her wife, Ginny, had been the second proudest day of her life. The proudest had been when she’d given birth to Nina.

Addison was a lucky woman, and she knew it.

The drive into Phail was only a few minutes, but it was full of hills and pretty views. By the time they crested the final hill, a tiny bit of heat had trickled out of the vents. “Good job, Wabi . We’re even going to be early. The diner is closed, but I might pop into Phail Phoods to grab some things while I’m in town.”

Her frugal habits meant only coming to town when necessary. She wanted to buy an electric car to reduce emissions and fuel costs, but that required more in the savings account. Her grin was automatic because she had savings, even if the amount would currently buy her a couple of tires on that dream car.

Addison parked in the lot nearest Phail General and Phail Phoods. There were new spots over by Phail Way Park, but that was a longer walk. With the wind chill below zero, she took the smarter option.

The park was another thing that made her smile. Over the spring and summer, the town of Phail had come together to demolish some old buildings and create the park. There were more plans in the works, but the gazebo was up, along with a wooden climbing wall that doubled as a screen for outdoor movie nights in good weather. In the summer, they were going to install a splash pad, which Nina would love.

Addison pulled her scarf over her mouth and took a breath of the almost warm air before getting out and locking up Wabi . Another car pulled into the lot at the same time. Phail was a small town, and she expected to recognize the vehicle, but it was a shiny electric SUV she’d never seen before.

And then she saw the driver and her heart nearly stopped. She gaped as she checked to make sure she wasn’t imagining things.

Why was he here?

What did he want after all this time?

Why would he search her out now?

Was he going to try to take Nina?

Fury and fear roared through her in equal measure. How dare he show up as if he had every right?

Heath Wilcox opened his car door and stood, then looked over the roof to find her staring at him. She watched as recognition showed in his eyes. “Addy? Addy Syrette? Is that really you?”

“Why are you here, Heath?”

Confusion and hurt ran over his face. She almost felt bad for her tone. But protecting Nina came first.

Heath moved around the back of his fancy car to approach her. “It’s such a small world.”

Which meant he hadn’t had much trouble finding her. As if he’d had to. She’d sent her address and contact information to him in every yearly parcel she mailed.

The fury shoved past the fear. “You’re not taking her from me.” His eyebrows shot up. With his money, no one probably ever told him no. “After all these years, after your complete and total lack of interest, why now?”

His mouth opened, but nothing came out.

Addison couldn’t move her feet. They were frozen in place. “You can’t take her from me. You’ve had chance after chance to meet her, but you’ve never answered a single text. Or call. Or email. You’ve never responded to a single one of the packages I’ve sent to you. You’ve never acknowledged her. Not once.”

Heath’s hands came up to the side as if in confusion. Addison’s heart pounded, and sweat covered her body. “You’ve had exactly zero interest in her until now. You can’t have her. We’ve made a good life for ourselves. She’s the best person I know, and I’m not giving her up.”

Panic rippled through her, and she couldn’t control the shudders. “You had your chance. You’ve had so many chances to love her, but you didn’t want her. I won’t give her up.”

The world started to spin and her voice sounded like it was coming from far away. “You can’t have her.”

Then everything went black.