4. Found Out
CHAPTER 4
Found Out
H eath struggled to process. In the last couple of hours, his entire life had changed several times. He’d been on a trip to visit his buddies. To drink a few beers, find out about their secret project, and maybe even have a family Christmas.
Ha.
Now he knew he actually had a family. A family of his own. Or at least a daughter of his own.
And if his mind immediately put him and Addy together as a couple, it couldn’t be helped. He’d gone from totally pissed at her to understanding.
Seeing her phone had nearly broken him. She’d called, texted, and emailed. Not just once but dozens of times.
I know you haven’t responded, and I’m not asking anything of you, but I thought you’d like to know that Nina took her first steps today. I wish I’d taken a picture of the pure joy on her face. She was so proud. She looked so like you when your team won the hockey playoffs.
Nina wants to skate. I’ve never understood why anyone wants to balance on tiny blades.
Nina presented a speech in front of her whole school today. On climate change and actionable items for kids her age. She’s got your gift for charming people.
When Nina is absorbed in a project, she taps her fingers just like you do.
So many precious moments he’d missed. So much love he’d lost.
And the only ones who could be responsible for it were his parents. “Where did you mail the packages you sent me?”
Her eyes had been almost closed, and he regretted asking the question. She’d had a severe asthma attack earlier, and she needed to rest. But the question had popped out as he looked through the pictures on her phone.
Pictures which were all Nina. No other men, which made him unreasonably happy.
“To your home in Boston.”
His parent’s home. He wanted to ask if she’d paid for registered mail to see if they’d been delivered, but he didn’t.
While the photos showed a happy, clean, and healthy Nina in every picture, they also showed that there hadn’t been excess money.
He could have helped with that. He should have helped with that. Guilt swamped him.
And then he refocused on her answer. There was a possibility one package might have gone missing, but to have them go missing every year? That was impossible. “My parents had to have known. They must have hidden the packages. Or thrown them away. They’re the only ones who could have kept this from me.” How could anyone throw something so precious away?
She nodded, her eyes sad and not triumphant that he believed her. “I didn’t tell them about the baby, but when I went to see them, they told me you wanted nothing to do with me anymore. That you’d joined the Army and wanted a fresh start with a new life and no ties to the past.”
And he’d thought his heart couldn’t handle another stab. “I’m so damn sorry, Addy. I never said that. You know that I planned on joining the military eventually, but I wanted to finish college first. And I had no intention of cutting ties with anyone, least of all you.”
He swallowed hard as he decided to tell her the rest. “On my eighteenth birthday, my dad told me to get in the car. I thought maybe there was a birthday surprise. Instead, he dropped me off at the recruitment office and said he’d see me in eight years.” Because every Wilcox served at least two terms.
Addy’s hand squeezed his. “That’s horrid. I’m so sorry you went through that.”
His laugh didn’t hold any humor. “And I’m so sorry you went through the pregnancy and birth alone. You must have been terrified. Tell me how you did it.”
Her hand flinched in his. Instead of releasing her, he ran his thumb over her hand.
“I was lucky.”
Doubtful. Her foster home hadn’t been great, but at least it had been safe from creeps.
“I already had the college scholarship. I found a nearby café that needed a server. They had a room I was able to rent at the same time.”
“So you went to college full-time, held down a job, supported yourself, and grew a human.”
That made her laugh. “I had some money saved up from the jobs I had in high school. It was fine.”
Again, he figured that was doubtful. Addy had worked at least two jobs since he’d known her, but the money wouldn’t have lasted long.
She smiled. “I met a friend while I was working at the café. Nimii Theriault. She was going to MassArt at the time because she’s an incredible visual artist. She was the first person I told when I realized I was pregnant.”
He felt like a jerk because that should have been him.
“Nimii was awesome. She was in her last year of school, and she was living with her grandmother. They invited me to live with them so I could save the money I was paying for rent.”
Her eyes filled with tears, but she smiled. “They wouldn’t let me pay a dime. Claimed I was helping them out by being a companion for Granny. The woman was sharp as a tack and involved in about a dozen clubs and activities. She had no need of a companion. I did my best to help with cooking and cleaning to make up for them letting me stay there.”
They were happy memories. “Nimii’s girlfriend was in culinary school in Boston. Ginny is from Phail. When they graduated, the two of them invited me and Nina to live here with them. Ginny’s parents had left her a house that was fully paid off. She also runs the No Fail Diner. They’re really good people.”
“That’s the woman Nina mentioned?”
Addy nodded. “She’s always called them her aunts. They’ve been amazing.”
“I’m so glad you had them. I’m so damn sorry I wasn’t there. And I’m angry as hell that I missed out on all of it. The pregnancy. The three a.m. feedings. The diapers. The temper tantrums. I missed it all, and I’m so pissed.”
Addy shrunk back into the couch. The movement was slight, but he caught it and squeezed her hand. “Not at you, Addy.”
Figuring he needed to be honest, he tried to smile. “An hour or two ago, maybe I was, but now that we’ve figured things out, I know where my anger needs to be directed.”
“I’m sure they thought they were protecting you. They thought I was after your money, and they never liked me much.”
Understatement of the year. Because, if nothing else, Georgiana and Clarence Wilcox were world-class snobs. Privileged, superior, and racist.
Once again, he was thankful for the influence of his grandparents. They’d been grounded and grateful. Not a single racist cell in either of them. “I have to go to Boston and find out what the hell they were thinking.”
A shadow crossed Addy’s eyes, but she nodded. “They’re your family. You need to talk to them.”
He nodded. “I do, and I will. But not right now. Right now, all I want is to start making up time. Start figuring out how to be a part of Nina’s life.”
He was relieved when Addy smiled and nodded. “That’s good.”
“What have you told her about me?” Because if his kid thought he’d ignored her all these years, she’d have a lot of righteous anger aimed his way. And he wouldn’t blame her a bit.
Addy shrugged. “Mostly the truth. I can’t keep track of lies. I told her I would tell her your name and the entire story when she was sixteen.”
But none of that was about him.
As if sensing his thoughts, she smiled again. “I’ve told her that her dad is a good man. Smart, kind, charming, athletic, hard-working.”
He waited while she sipped more tea.
“I told her you would love her if you met her. Since she’s been old enough, she’s helped me make up the birthday packages I’ve sent.”
That gave him a bit of relief. Addy hadn’t believed he was a complete asshole. And she’d given him a shot with Nina. “So you suspected my parents weren’t telling the truth?”
She shrugged and hid behind her hair. “It sounds awful to say it, but I hoped they were lying about you.”
He had to swallow hard against the emotion. Addy was such a good person. “It doesn’t sound awful at all. Thank you for not telling Nina I was a complete jerk.”
She laughed at that. “I try really hard not to lie, especially to Nina. You’ve never been a jerk. I just didn’t know how to find you. I’m sorry. I tried looking for you online once, but all I found was information about your parents attending events. I found nothing about you.”
“I don’t have social media. Never saw the point.” His anger at her had completely dissipated. He believed her story. “Can I hug you?”
Her watery eyes looked up at him, and she nodded.
When Heath wrapped her in his arms, he wished like hell that they hadn’t lost a dozen years.
A ddy woke to the scent of garlic and rosemary. Her brain was foggy, and it took her a moment to remember it wasn’t morning. Naps always made her groggy, and it took her a few more moments to realize that she’d fallen asleep while Heath was holding her.
The emotions of the day came swamping back, and she closed her eyes again.
Heath hadn’t known he was a dad. She’d often wondered if that was the case but had decided no parent could be that cruel to totally dismiss a granddaughter.
They hadn’t passed on the parcels she’d sent. Had they tossed them without looking? Had they never known about Nina? Either they hadn’t even bothered to open the parcels before tossing them, or they’d known and hadn’t wanted her. Hadn’t wanted Heath to know about her.
All because Addison hadn’t been good enough for them. It didn’t matter if it was because she was a foster kid with no money or assets or if it was because she was Ojibwe. Either way was hateful. Nina’s only grandparents were horrid human beings.
Addison blew out a breath and pushed up to a sitting position. The asthma attacks took a lot out of her. But today, she figured the mental and physical exhaustion was from the emotions, not the physical stuff.
Shoving up off the couch took her a moment, but she didn’t collapse back. Good news. Instead of confronting Heath, she headed to the bathroom and nearly shrieked at her reflection.
She looked like she’d had her lights punched out. At least she hadn’t been wearing makeup, so there were no mascara streaks to add to the look. After washing her face and brushing her teeth and hair, she looked more human. Sort of.
Well, he’d already seen her. And it wasn’t like she was going to look any better without a minor miracle. Besides, this wasn’t a date.
They needed to figure out how to tell Nina. Which was probably why he hadn’t left. The man had to have a million questions still.
Addison found her polar bear slippers and a wooly sweater to slip on. It took her a long time to eliminate the chill that came with an attack, and Lia always emphasized the importance of warmth.
She reminded herself it wasn’t a date.
When she shuffled into the kitchen, Heath stood at the stove. Three elements were being used at once. Maybe a record in this house.
He turned from the stove with a grin, which widened when he took in her outfit. She pulled the sweater around her, and he chuckled. “I like the look. Food will be ready in about five minutes.”
He stirred something and then turned back to her. “Sit. I was so completely overwhelmed at the doctor’s office that I didn’t ask any questions. I don’t remember your asthma being that severe. Was I a dense teenager or have things changed? What do you need?”
She hadn’t had a man care about her since she’d been that teen girl madly in love with Heath. Being a mom struggling to make ends meet hadn’t left a lot of room for anything else.
“I mostly need to rest and stay warm. You didn’t have to cook. Or stay.”
His eyebrows shot up at that. “I wasn’t leaving you here on your own. You scared the hell out of me today.”
“Sorry.”
He rolled his eyes. “Not your fault. I’ve had some time to process some of this, and I have some things I’d like to say.”
The fear roared back, and she ducked her head so he wouldn’t see. She couldn’t let him take Nina.
“Hey.”
When she didn’t answer, he appeared at her side. He squatted down and placed a hand on her thigh. “Hey, Addy. Look at me. Please.”
She swallowed hard and raised her eyes. His held no anger. Instead, she saw compassion.
He brushed her hair back from her face. “Nothing bad. I promise. I would never do anything to hurt you or Nina. I promise.”
She blew out a breath and nodded. Heath had always been a man of his word, even when he’d been a teen. She needed to stop panicking and breathe.
He watched her for a moment before he nodded back. Then he stood and moved back to the stove. In only moments, he set two plates on the table. Chicken and pasta mixed with roasted vegetables. Her stomach growled, making him laugh.
“Good. You’re hungry, too. I hope it was okay to dig through your fridge and pantry. I didn’t want to leave you alone to go find food in town.”
“It’s fine. You’re welcome to what we have.”
“Okay. By the way, I found a box of cereal knocked over and spilled. I cleaned it up so you don’t attract any critters. In this cold, they’ll be sniffing out any food they can find. Now, let’s eat, and I’ll talk so you don’t have to wonder any longer.”
He knew her so well. She was a rip off the bandaid type. And he’d cleaned up her pantry. Nina rarely ate cereal, so Addy must have knocked over the box without realizing it.
“First. I want to get to know Nina. I’ve missed so much of her life, and I want her to know I didn’t shun her. I want her to know she’s important to me and that she can count on me to support her any way I can.”
Addison’s eyes filled with tears. Those were amazing words.
He took a bite and then pointed his fork at her. “I heard you in the parking lot this morning. I didn’t have a clue what you were talking about at first, but I figured it out. I have no desire to take Nina away from you. I wouldn’t do that, and I’m sorry that you think I would.”
That made her flush. “I’m sorry. It was a panic reaction. I couldn’t imagine any other reason you would show up without calling first.”
He blew out a breath. “I didn’t have a clue you were here. I was actually in town to meet up with some friends who live here.”
“That’s a bizarre coincidence. This is a really small town.”
He grinned. “Which is why I avoided coming in the first place.” His smile faded. “If I’d shown up when they’d first asked me, I would have found you and Nina months ago. More regrets I have to live with.”
“It’s not your fault, Heath.”
“Thanks for saying that, but the guilt is kind of all-consuming at the moment.”
Addison put down her fork. “I hate to say this, but I think the entire fault lies with your parents. They kept this from you. And maybe I could have tried harder to get in touch with you.”
His lopsided smile had always touched her heart. That hadn’t changed. “I scrolled through your phone. You tried. It’s not like I have any social media profiles out there. My business doesn’t have a website with my name or picture on it.” He sighed. “I’ve been thinking about the phone thing. When my dad dropped me off at the recruitment office that day, he also gave me a new phone. Said he wanted me to have the top of the line if I was going overseas. He’d had the data transferred and all my contacts were there, including you.”
He swallowed hard. “My dad is a bulldozer and has a lot of connections. He always gets his way. I think he must have used one of his contacts in the tech industry. They did something to my phone so that your number wouldn’t work, but it would look like it worked. Even when I changed phones.”
“Is that possible?”
Heath shrugged. “No idea. But it fits what we know. Maybe there’s some kind of malware in my phone attached to your contact info. My dad’s enough of a jerk to not have any qualms about doing it.”
Wow. That was a horrible thought. “I’m sorry they did that to you.”
“Me too. And I’m going to take that issue up with them both soon. They have a lot to answer for.”
Addison doubted either of them would think they’d done anything wrong, but she hoped for Heath’s sake she was mistaken.
Heath took another bite before he spoke again. “The most important thing is Nina. How do we tell her? When do we tell her? I’ve got a place I can stay in Phail and I can work from anywhere. I want to be here in town, but I also want you to be comfortable. We can do this your way and on your schedule. You obviously know her best. What do you think we should do?”
Her heart warmed. We, not I . He was approaching this as she would have expected before all the heartbreak. Like the good man he was. She smiled at him and was about to speak when the back door flew open, and her whirlwind of a daughter flew in.
Nina barely spared Addison a glance. Her gaze was locked on Heath. She studied him intently for a few seconds. When she spoke, her voice shook. “Are you my father?”