Chapter 33
THIRTY-THREE
Grant Wilder loved me.
They were the words I’d been wanting to hear. Needing to hear.
I wanted to pull the words to my chest where they would absorb into my body and become part of me. Part of me that could never be taken away.
But I’d been loved before, and that love had been taken away. It hadn’t survived.
What would I do if I had Grant’s love and then lost it?
To assume things would be any different this time was to believe something the data didn’t support. Not just the data from my experience with Chase—the data my own product had given me.
Grant and I were a 12% match. Even relationships between people who were a 95% match had a high probability of failing.
I forced a smile onto my lips. “You say that now.”
“Yes, Vivian.” He splayed his fingers on my thighs. “I do say that now. And I mean it.”
I looked at his hands, then set mine over his. “For now.”
It was quiet.
“Is this about Chase?” he finally asked.
“No,” I protested. “It’s not.”
His eyes searched my face. “Vivian, I’m going to say it again. I love you.”
I pulled in a shaky breath but said nothing.
His gaze was fixed on me, the little V growing deeper. It reminded me of the night of my date with Leo.
He slipped his hands out from under mine.
“You’re upset,” I said.
“Yeah. I am.” The intensity of the response surprised me. He really was mad.
“It’s not about you,” I said. “It’s just…reality.”
“It is about me. You’re choosing to believe Chase—an idiot who couldn’t see what was right in front of him—over me.”
“It’s not about believing Chase. It’s just…” I struggled to find words.
“I know what it is,” he said. “You think you’re some kind of anomaly. So what if you are? What do I care if you’re an anomaly? I’m telling you I love you. But it doesn’t matter how many times I tell you that. Not if you refuse to believe it.”
My heart thumped against my chest as we stared at each other in silence.
His frown softened slightly, matching his voice when it came out. “We could have something really good, Vivian. I know that. I can feel it, and I think you can too. But not if you’re always bracing yourself for the other shoe to drop.”
My entire body was tight with tension, with the need to do something, anything.
He let out a little sigh. “I’m pretty tired. I’m going to go get some sleep.”
I nodded, my throat tight.
He turned away, and I grasped at his hand before it was out of reach.
He paused and looked down at our entwined fingers, then squeezed my hand and dropped it again.
And then he left.