Chapter 18
eighteen
A few days later, as the last bit of light from the day filtered through the fog, I stepped across the walkway to my apartment building and pushed the key into the lock on my door. Warm arms surrounded me from behind, wrapped in a black sweatshirt. “Hey, lover.”
As I spread a wide smile over my face, I twisted and gazed at Micah.
He stood before me, all dark hair, vulnerable brown eyes, and porcelain skin.
Cupping my palms on his cheeks, I leaned in and gave him a long, sensual kiss. “Hi.” I returned to the door and opened it, stepping inside.
He followed, flipped on the lights, and took a seat on my couch. “How’d it go today?”
After closing the door, I ambled to the couch and sat beside him. “Today was great. I’d forgotten how good it felt to be in the studio with all of us working on music.” My heart warmed as my brain replayed the day. I sank into the couch. “How was your day?”
“Pretty good.” He took my hand in his.
“So, did you get your journaling done?” I squeezed his hand.
“Yeah. I went for a hike, had lunch in the taproom, then took a nap. It was nice.” The smile on his face faded, and he toyed with the hem of his sweatshirt. “My therapist gave me an assignment.”
“He did?” Something wasn’t right. I focused on him. “What is it?”
“I have to expose myself to things that normally trigger me, so that I can desensitize myself to them.” He sighed. “He thinks I’m developing a phobia.”
This could be bad. My gut tightened. “Like what sort of things and when?” I breathed in deeply.
“He wants me to go to Sunnyvale and see people and places...” He took a stuttered inhale. “Like maybe my old condo.”
“Shit. That sounds hard.” I wrapped an arm around his shoulders and drew him into my chest. “When does he want you to do that?”
“This week sometime.” He brushed his fingers up and down my arm, following them with his gaze. “We’ve already gone over some calming exercises for me to do when I’m there.”
“Figure out what day you feel up to it and I’ll take some time out of the studio so I can go with you.” I kissed his cheek, enjoying the warmth on my lips.
He gave a slow shake of his head. “No, you don’t have to do that. I’ll meet up with Joey for lunch and then just drive by the condo or something. I think that would be enough.” He grit his teeth.
There was no way I’d leave him to do this on his own. “Absolutely not. I said I’d be there for you and I will,” I said. “It’s no big deal, really.” I tightened my hold on his shoulders. “I’d like to meet this Joey, anyway.” I offered him a smile.
He glanced at me and quirked his lips in a faint grin. “Okay.”
“So, what day do you think you want to do this? Maybe the day after tomorrow? That would give me a day to prepare the guys.” I would set them up in a way where they wouldn’t lose any time.
“Sure, that works. The sooner the better, as far as my therapist is concerned.” He laid his head on my shoulder. “I missed you today.” He drew his knees up to sit sideways on the couch, snuggling closer into my side.
“I missed you, too.” I thought about The Micah Song we’d worked on in the studio. Should I tell him about it, or should it be a surprise? A surprise. A grin quirked my lips. “So, what’s for dinner?”
He buried his face deeper into my shoulder. “Delivery pizza?” He released a low chuckle.
“Sure. I’m too worn out to go anywhere, anyway. And I’ve been singing all day, so my voice needs a rest.” I relaxed by his side, enjoying the feel of him in my arms. “In fact, I should make some tea with honey.”
“I’ll make you some tea after I order the pizza.” He lowered a leg enough to pull his cell phone out of the pocket of his board shorts and ordered a pizza. After, he tossed the phone on one of the round coffee tables. “There.”
A wicked idea crept into my head. “Hey, how about we watch a movie in my bedroom, under the covers, naked?”
He lifted his head and smirked at me. “We’ll never watch the movie.”
“So?” Leaning in, I placed a long, passionate kiss on his lips, opening my mouth and exploring inside, enjoying the taste of him, all warm with a hint of sweet.
He released a low moan and rested his hand on my cheek, then continued the kiss, intensifying it, and worked his way to my neck, licking and nipping.
“Damn, Micah.” My cock ached and hardened in an instant. A heated shiver played up my spine. “We better hurry before the pizza gets here.” I pushed him under me to the couch and ground my cock into his hips. Pulses of pleasure wound through me. My breath became ragged.
He rocked his hips into mine, his body shuddering, his breath coming in uneven draws. “I’ve been thinking about this all day.” He slicked his palm with saliva, then snuck his hand between us and opened my jeans, sliding his hand inside and stroking me.
Sensitivity jolted through me. As I nipped at his earlobe, a whimper escaped me. I thrust my hips in time with his hand, then slicked my palm, opened his board shorts and worked it inside. I stroked just as quick and hard on his shaft.
He squirmed and released a sharp gasp. “Oh, fuck.”
I pumped faster, losing myself in his responses, licking the shell of his ear, my hips jerking with need. My peak teased me, just at the edge. Breathless, I said, “Faster, Micah.”
Quickening his pace over my shaft, his hips thrusted harder. His head arced back on the couch as his cum spilled over my fingers, letting out an urgent moan.
I careened over the edge and pulses of climax overtook me, spurting cum into his pumping fingers and my briefs. Biting my lip, I partially held in a gasp. As it slowed, I laid my head on his shoulder, panting. “I guess now we’ll be able to watch the movie in bed naked.”
He took deep breaths. “We’ll see.”
Wiping my hand on his stomach, I wrapped my arms around him. “I just want to feel you close, that’s all.” My heart swelled with warmth.
“That sounds wonderful.” He kissed my cheek. “Let’s go get cleaned up before the pizza gets here and then I’ll make your tea.”
I smiled. How I loved the charming, adorable Micah who took care of me.
* * *
Two days later, I paired my black Jefferson Starship t-shirt with some blue board shorts and drove my Jeep down Highway 101 south, toward Palo Alto. The traffic hadn’t been as bad as Micah said it could be, so at least we had that. It was probably because we’d left Pacifica so late.
Good thing I was driving. I wasn’t sure I trusted Micah to drive with the task we had ahead of us. I glanced at him, all wrapped in a white t-shirt and gray shorts, gazing out the window. “Hey.”
He startled, as if he’d woken from a nap. “Yeah?”
“Are you doing okay?” I touched his thigh.
The navigation on my phone said, “Use the right lane to take exit 404 for Willow Road.”
“Yeah, I’m doing okay so far.” He creased his brows. “Thank you for taking the time away from the studio to do this with me.”
I took the exit. There was no way I’d let him do this on his own. “Of course. I’m really looking forward to meeting this friend of yours.” At least I’d had a day to prepare and get some vocal scratch tracks down. The guys should work on their parts today.
He let a smile play over his lips. “I suppose I should warn you, he’s a big fan of your band.”
“Seriously?” I liked this Joey already. I drove through shopping plazas, tall trees, and dense vegetation on Willow Road. It looked more like Minnesota than California around here. I grinned. “So, does he know I’m with you?”
“I told him I had a surprise for him.” He offered me a sly grin.
“Great.” Hopefully, the guy wouldn’t get too tongue-tied. I took a few more turns, aided by my phone.
He shifted forward in his seat. “We’re getting close. You’ll have to drive around a little to find a parking spot.”
I drove by the New York New York Sandwich Shop, then took right turns around the block until I found a spot and parallel parked the Jeep. “Okay, here we are. You lead the way.”
After climbing out of the Jeep, I waited for him. As I scanned the area, I took in the modern, nondescript buildings of two to three stories, some made of bricks while others were stucco. Every twenty feet, a tree with a skinny trunk and rounded canopy of leaves stuck up out of a hole in the sidewalk.
He joined me on the sidewalk and pointed down the street. “It’s this way.”
It was much warmer here than back in Pacifica. I wouldn’t need a sweatshirt for once. I took his hand and strolled with him in the midday sun. “So, you used to come here a lot?”
“Yeah. I know my way around this area pretty well. I grew up in a house close to here.” He lifted his face as if drinking in the sunshine.
“Can we see it? It’d be cool to see the house you grew up in.” I gave him a warm smile as we took the corner to the right.
“Sure.” He looked ahead and his gaze caught on something, then he smiled.
“Micah!” A tall young man jogged toward us. He had short, brown hair, cut close on the sides and longer on top, and wore a black polo shirt and beige khaki pants.
Micah released my hand and jogged toward the young man. “Joey!” He covered Joey in a warm embrace.
I’d never seen him react to someone else like that before. The guy was straight, but...I watched the exchange and pursed my lips.
“Joey, come meet my boyfriend, Ash.” He led Joey by the wrist toward me.
Joey approached me with his hand stretched out for a handshake, did a double take of me, then narrowed his blue eyes. “Nice to meet you, Ash.”
I shook Joey’s hand. “Likewise.” Micah called me his boyfriend. I gave Joey a big grin.
Micah’s gaze darted between Joey and me. “Well?”
Joey looked Micah over, then focused on me. He spread a smirk over his face. “Is this...Are you?” He touched his lips. “No fucking way.” He widened his eyes.
“Yes, he’s Ash Oakley from The Swarm.” Micah ticked his head, grinned, then crossed his arms over his chest.
“Holy shit. I love you guys.” With a broad smile, Joey stepped closer and gave me a quick hug.
I hugged Joey back. Apparently, this guy was a hugger. “Thanks. Micah told me you liked our music.”
Joey’s attention drew to Micah. “You son of a bitch, you. You’ve been up there in the fog hooking up with Ash Oakley?”
“Not just hooking up. We’re together.” Micah wrapped an arm around me. “He’s my boyfriend.”
“Whatever, man. It’s cool,” Joey said, still beaming at me.
“So, how about we get some food? I’m starved,” I said, my arm draping around Micah.
The three of us walked the short distance to the sandwich shop and entered through a glass door. I scanned the small room. There were racks of chips in front of a deli-style counter and refrigerator units holding drinks to one side. The only dining tables had been outside. I strolled to the ordering counter and scanned over the menu, hanging on a sign next to a picture of the Statue of Liberty.
A man with dark hair, wearing an apron over a dark button-down shirt and black slacks, waited for our order. “Can I help you?”
“I’ll get the pastrami sandwich.” Grabbing a bag of chips from a metal shelf, I walked to the refrigerated drinks section and pulled a bottle of iced tea out of it, while the other two ordered. I turned to Micah. “What do you want to drink?”
“Grab two more iced teas.” Micah smiled at Joey, now ordering his sandwich.
I brought the three bottles of iced tea to the counter and reached into my pocket for my wallet.
Joey held out his hand. “Oh no, I got this. It’s not every day you get to have lunch with one of the best singers in alternative rock.” He brought his wallet out and paid.
“Thanks, man,” I said.
The man behind the counter set three to-go containers down in front of us. “There you go.”
We each picked up a container and thanked the man, then walked out the glass door to a round bistro table. I sat beside Micah, and Joey pulled up another chair to sit across from us.
Micah opened his container and lifted half of his sandwich out of it. “So, how’s work going?”
“Same old, same old. We’re working on the next version of autonomous driving software. The 5G rollout may come sooner rather than later.” Joey took a bite of his sandwich.
Chewing, Micah nodded. “What’s going on with the new batteries? Have they gotten the manufacturing process down yet?”
I was lost. What did 5G have to do with autonomous driving? I should keep my mouth shut, so I wouldn’t look stupid. I took a bite of my sandwich.
“Yeah, sounds like they made a few tweaks and gained another five percent.” Joey set his sandwich down and licked mustard from a finger. “Getting our functional safety certification this time around is going to be a bitch, though.”
“It always is, isn’t it?” Micah chuckled.
“Yeah.” Joey nodded his head. “Hey, the build server went down last week. You should have seen Robert lose his shit.” He laughed.
“Oh, damn. How long was it down for?” Micah ate a bite of his sandwich.
“About a half day. Enough to miss our sprint goal,” Joey said.
Micah’s attention turned to me. “I’m sorry, we must be boring you.” He touched my wrist, then took a bite of his sandwich.
“No, it’s fascinating, really.” I didn’t know what the hell they were talking about. This was a side of him I didn’t know. I knitted my brows, releasing a quiet huff.
“When are you coming back?” Joey took a sip of iced tea.
Micah glanced at me. “I’m not sure yet. I think I have another month of leave.”
“I know Robert would like to have you back sooner than that.” Joey peeked at me, then focused on Micah. “We could really use your help with this next release.”
Micah held his sandwich to his mouth, then set it down with a sigh. “I don’t know if I’m ready yet.”
Joey shifted in his chair. “Yeah, I get it. Why would you want to work when you’re hanging out on the beach with Ash fucking Oakley?” He widened his smile. “Why are you here, anyway, Ash? Did you decide to move here or something?”
I washed a bite of sandwich down with iced tea. “We’re out here recording in San Francisco. There’s a studio there that has a lot of cool history and awesome sound, so we booked some time there to record the next album.”
Joey dropped his jaw and lifted his brows. “So, the whole band is here?”
“Yeah.” Micah gave Joey a sly smile. “I’ve met them all. We’ve been having bonfires on the beach.”
“Holy shit, Micah. Invite me next time.” He slapped Micah’s arm. “You’ve been holding out on me, you little shit.”
Micah smirked and glanced at me. “I suppose I could invite you next time.”
“We’re looking into playing an invitation-only gig somewhere in the city in a month. I can make sure you get an invitation if you’d like.” I ate the last bite of my sandwich.
“Definitely.” Joey smiled at me and closed his food container. “So, where you both off to after this?”
Micah frowned. “I think we’ll drive by the Tesla headquarters so I can show it to Ash. Then I think we’ll pass by the house I grew up in, then go to my old condo.”
I wasn’t sure if Joey knew the complete story of why we were there. I gauged his reaction.
Joey let the smile on his face fade. “Do you really think that’s a good idea? I mean, when we moved you out of that place, you were so fucked up, I figured you’d end up in a mental institution.” He focused on me. “Be careful with him. He terrified me.”
Joey knew everything, probably more than I did. I dropped my gaze to the table and pinched my lips. “I’ll take good care of him, Joey.”
Micah chewed his lower lip. “It’ll be okay. Like I told you, my therapist wants me to do this. I have some coping strategies.” He took my hand. “We’ll only drive by the condo this time. I won’t get out of the car.”
Joey leaned in, fixated on me. “I seriously don’t think this is a good idea, and I told Micah that. I don’t know what this therapist is thinking, but he wasn’t there that day. Micah checked out, like, completely. Just stared at nothing for hours. I thought we’d lost him.”
Micah huffed. “I’ve come a long way since then.”
There was more to the story that I didn’t know. “Wait, when did you move out? Did you have to live there until the place sold?”
Joey folded his fingers on the table. “We, me and a few other guys, moved him out the day that it happened. He couldn’t stay there. We put all Micah’s shit in storage, and he stayed at his mom’s house until it sold. That fucking Matthew was such an asshole.”
“So, you knew Matthew.” Now I wanted to know it all, and Joey was finally the one who could tell me. I tightened my hold on Micah’s hand and came in closer to Joey.
“Yeah. He was a dick.” Joey glanced at Micah. “Sorry, Micah, but you’ve heard this from me before.” His attention turned back to me. “Matthew was the kind of guy who, as soon as you met him, you knew something wasn’t right. He treated Micah like shit. I don’t know how many times Micah came to work late, looking like hell, because he was up all night fighting with the guy. He couldn’t let anything go.”
Joey eyed Micah, who had his head hung forward, his dark bangs covering his eyes. “Hey, you okay?”
Micah nodded, and in a quiet voice, said, “I’m not proud of being stupid enough to be in that situation.”
Joey shook Micah’s hand. “It’s not your fault.” He said, “Ash is right. That guy wouldn’t take no for an answer. Once you were in his sights, he wouldn’t give up. He didn’t give you a choice.” He looked at me. “I remember the first time Micah told me about him. They met in a bar.” His focus returned to Micah. “Right?”
In a small voice, Micah said, “Yes.”
“Micah was impressed because the guy was persistent, even though Micah turned him down.” Joey glanced at him and frowned. “Look, the point of all this, is what happened wasn’t Micah’s fault.”
His gaze met Joey’s, his forehead wrinkling.
“Micah didn’t deserve what that guy did to him. I mean, it was tragic that the guy lost his life, but the way he went out was downright vindictive and mean. He meant to hurt Micah as much as possible,” Joey said. “And he did.”
I leaned back in my seat, letting Joey’s words sink in. What Micah had been through was awful. It was surprising Micah could even let himself fall in love at all after that. “I get what you’re saying. I never thought it was Micah’s fault.”
Joey raked a hand through his short, dark hair. “Just take good care of my boy, Ash. He needs someone who treats him right.” He smiled at Micah. “And I need him to come back and help me get these damned software releases out.” He placed his hand over Micah’s forearm. “He’s really an incredible coder. We miss him at work. And well, I miss hanging out with him.”
Micah smiled at him. “I miss hanging out with you, too. We haven’t played Destiny in forever.”
“Yeah, I still have your Xbox at my house. Let me know when you want it back,” Joey said.
“I will. I still don’t think I can play any shooting games yet, though. Maybe Madden would be better?” Micah forced a grin at him.
I pressed my lips together. Video games . Dilan and Justin loved playing them on the tour bus, but I had never gotten into them. I’d rather spend my time on music. I focused on Joey. “Don’t worry. I promise to take good care of him. You can count on me.” I couldn’t get that damned Jefferson Starship song out of my head now. Count on my love .
Micah looked at me. “We should get going and get this over with.”
“Yeah.” I stood from the table, grabbed all the trash, and tossed it in the garbage bin by the front door of the sandwich shop.
Micah and Joey rose from the table and stepped toward each other, Joey giving Micah a fierce hug. “I miss you, man.”
Micah hugged him back, resting his head on Joey’s taller shoulder. “I miss you, too.”
They released each other, and Joey said, “Call me. Especially if you’re going to do one of those bonfires with the band.”
“Sure.” Micah sniffled and wiped at his eyes. “See you soon.”
“It was awesome to meet you, Ash.” Joey gave me a quick hug.
As we parted, I said, “It was great to meet one of Micah’s friends. See you.”
Joey took a few steps away from us and waved, his back to us.
I took Micah’s hand, and we strolled toward the car. “You okay?”
“I will be. I’d forgotten how much I leaned on Joey and my other friends before I left for Pacifica. I was so caught up in guilt after the money came in, I think I didn’t feel I deserved to have friends or anyone.” He looked at me with wide eyes and parted his lips.
“You know that’s not true now, right?” I hooked an arm around his waist.
“Yes, I do.” He leaned in and placed a kiss on my lips. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.” I smiled at him.