Chapter 4
Four
TAVIK
Asmile stretched across my face when I woke in the morning with Saneth cuddled against me, naked and snoring.
We had spent most of the night enjoying each other, and I looked forward to more, but I also needed to figure out some way to show him how I felt about him.
His comment about not expecting me to feel the same way bothered me, but I understood why he felt that way.
He had no reason to believe I ever felt differently.
I didn’t even realize until yesterday, which made me feel foolish.
It made me wonder what pushed him to tell me the truth. He said he had begun to have feelings for me at seventeen, but never mentioned it before now. What had changed?
The snores stopped, and his breathing changed, alerting me that he was awake.
I felt his whole body stiffen for just a moment, probably thinking like I had when I first woke that it had all been a dream.
To reassure him, I hugged him closer to me and kissed the top of his head, murmuring a quiet, “Good morning.”
He let out a long breath, relaxing again. “Good morning.”
I watched as his body began to move as it always did in the mornings, stretching in a way that accentuated all his lean muscles.
After being able to touch and taste every inch of him, the act that I had once thought was cute was now sensual in a way that had my already hard cock throbbing for attention.
Saneth definitely noticed, a smug grin overtaking his face when I turned on my side and he felt it press against his hip.
“Didn’t get enough last night?” he queried.
I could tell by the look on his face that he was expecting a tease in response. Instead, I ran a finger down his chest to his hard cock, wrapping my fist around it. “I feel as though I will never get enough of you,” I answered honestly.
He sucked in a breath, leaning into my touch, and when he drew me into a kiss, I reminded him without words what he was to me.
His breath was shaky when he pulled away, and there was some emotion hidden behind the lust in his eyes that I wanted to draw out.
He distracted me with his touch before I could.
It became a race to see who could make the other come first. I lost, but only just, and got to enjoy watching his expressions as he came without being distracted, making me feel like I still won.
After our breathing returned to normal and I’d cleaned us both up with a cloth, I finally found a chance to ask, “What changed?”
Blinking up at me in confusion, he cocked his head. “What?”
“What changed?” I prompted again. “You said you loved me since we were seventeen. Why did you decide to tell me now and not sooner?”
Understanding lit up his expression momentarily before he sheepishly admitted, “Patrick. I thought… If he and Verus bonded, I thought you might finally let him go. The thought of you with someone else hurt, but watching you torment yourself hurt more. If you couldn’t have what you wanted, I wanted you to move on.
To let him go. I spoke to Patrick about it, hoping he’d tell me their intentions toward each other, and he figured out why I truly wanted to know. ”
The petty part of me didn’t like Patrick's involvement in our story, but Saneth continued without noticing my annoyance.
“He and Finn agreed to help me. We talked through options together and spoke about their own experiences.”
My brows furrowed as I thought about the last week. “That was where you went? I thought you were just tired of hearing me complain.”
He snorted, raising an eyebrow at me. “I was. You are too stubborn for your own good. But I also wanted their help.” He sighed, leaning against my palm when I cupped his cheek.
“Something Patrick said to me made me realize I was risking too much by waiting for you to see me. He asked me if I’d choose to watch you fall in love with someone else rather than speak my truth.
It was hard enough to watch you pine over Verus.
If I had to watch someone else catch your attention, someone who might return your affections, it would have killed me. ”
“So they convinced you to talk to me?” I did my best not to make a face. If Patrick speaking with Saneth helped bring us together, I couldn’t despise him for that. It was only jealousy that made me feel a certain way toward him.
“Them and… Yamileth.”
Jerking back, I looked at him incredulously. “Yamileth? She poisoned me!” I bellowed.
“Well… She also had good advice. And gave me liquor when I was too nervous to confront you. She’s not as bad as she seems.”
A series of choking sounds escaped me, but I couldn’t come up with something to say. On the one hand, she’d helped Saneth when he needed her most. On the other— “She poisoned me!”
He rolled his eyes. “She did not. She gave you the shits. Apparently, she tried to do the same to me, but it didn’t work as effectively as it had on you. I don’t hold a grudge, nor should you, after what she did for us.”
That didn’t make me feel any better. If anything, it only made me angrier. I could take the pain and humiliation. No one was allowed to hurt Saneth. He was mine to protect.
Warm, roughened hands cupped my face, drawing me down.
Saneth’s lips on mine drew me away from my wrath, settling me in the way only his presence ever could.
He was my best friend, my confidant, closer to me than my own family.
Becoming more, having him wrapped around me like this, was worth the pain and suffering I’d endured. He was worth it.
Drawing away, I rested my forehead against his with a gusty sigh. “Fine. I will let it go. But I don’t trust her.”
“You’ll also apologize to Patrick,” he informed me, making me blink again.
“What? Why?”
That got me an exasperated look. “You were cruel in your jealousy, and he still chose to help me. You will apologize to him and make it right.”
I made a face, but I should have known better than to argue.
Saneth called me stubborn, but he was worse than I was.
He used a move we’d learned during our training to flip me onto my back, straddling my hips as he glared down at me.
I appreciated the view and hoped that his intention was to distract me with more sex, but again, I should have known better.
“No. No more sex until you apologize,” he insisted with a glare. “He’s my friend, Tavik. He helped me reach you. You’ll apologize to him or else.”
Since I didn’t want him to find out yet just how much I’d give him, including apologizing to Patrick, I instead playfully asked, “Or else?”
He leaned over, surprising me by sinking his teeth into my neck in a bite that was just shy of painful.
I groaned, and my hips lifted automatically, my cock swelling.
If this was my punishment, I wasn’t going to say anything to Patrick because I wanted him to continue.
Perhaps with a few orgasms, I’d be more open to the idea.
Moving his mouth to my ear, he whispered, “Or else I’ll make you hard and keep you that way until you do. You forget, I know you well. You’ve confessed to me what drives you wild in the past. I will use that to my advantage.”
Exhaling sharply, I looked up at him incredulously when he pulled back with a smug grin. “You truly are evil,” I breathed.
His grin only grew until he looked like a shadowstalker ready to devour me. How had I not noticed before that I wanted him? Seeing him like this, making demands and fighting for what he wanted, made my heart skip and my cock twitch. I was a fool not to have seen it before.
“Alright, fine. I’ll apologize,” I said, defeated.
“Promise?” he demanded insistently.
I nodded. “I promise, brokkul. I will make it right.”
I’d hoped he would help me with my swollen cock once I admitted defeat. He’d told me once that he tended to be a possessive lover. I didn’t think he’d want anyone to see me wanting like I was. So when he rolled off me and grabbed his legwear, it took me off guard.
“Wait. Now?”
“Yes, now,” he said, tossing my own legwear at me and hitting me in the face with it. “He should be up already to make breakfast with Yamileth. We can talk to him before things get busy.”
He gave me no choice but to get moving, nudging and shoving me when I dragged my feet until we’d done a thorough search for the man and eventually stood outside Verus’s tent.
He was so intent on seeing his friend that he didn’t hear the sounds I did before calling out.
I had to bite back a laugh. At least I wasn’t the only one being interrupted for this.
“Patrick?”
The sounds stopped, and whispers replaced them before Patrick called out in response. “I’m coming!”
My muscles went taut as Patrick and Verus stepped out, my instinct to start a fight with the man who’d ignored my interest on the tip of my tongue. I swallowed it down, keeping my gaze on Saneth, who raised his hands placatingly.
“He’s here to apologize,” he rushed out.
Verus’s dark gaze shifted to me, and I met his eye, fighting back a scowl. I still felt the sting of his rejection, despite how things had ended up. It would take time to move on from it.
“Go on, then,” he demanded when I didn’t speak.
My lip lifted, and something crass crossed my mind, but Saneth knew me well. He elbowed me in the stomach, making me grunt and dashing the words from my mouth. I rubbed at the sore spot, frowning at him.
“Ouch.”
He rolled his eyes. “Don’t pretend it hurt. You promised, Tavik.”
With a long-suffering sigh, I nodded and turned to face Patrick, forcing my words to be polite.
“I wanted to apologize. I let my jealousies blind me from the truth and was unjustly cruel to you. Saneth told me what you did for us. Had you not befriended him, I might not have ever found my happiness. So I’m sorry. And thank you for hearing his words.”
Saneth drew in a breath at my confession, looking up at me with a surprised expression on his face. It made me want to kiss him, but Patrick’s reply interrupted me before I could reach for him.
“Thank you for apologizing. Saneth is my friend. I’m glad he found the courage to tell you how he felt.”
So was I. More thankful than anyone knew.
When I looked at Saneth again, projecting my feelings to him, he rolled his eyes and elbowed me again, though gentler this time, and a smile teased at his lips.
“Okay, we will leave you be now. I thought I would find you in the cooking tent since breakfast is soon. I’m sorry if I woke you. ”
Patrick’s eyes suddenly went wide, confusing me as he whipped his gaze skyward.
He spun without another word, dashing back into the tent, leaving Verus standing there with a confused frown on his face that mirrored my own.
He had to grab the heavier man when he came rushing back out again, holding him still to ask what was wrong.
“Ravsol? Where are you going?”
“I’m late!” Patrick screeched, wriggling free of his hold. “You kept me up too late!”
I snorted, unable to help myself, and Verus laughed outright as Patrick hobbled away.
Amused, Saneth followed him, leaving me and Verus alone for the first time.
It was awkward, and it felt strange to be near him and feel nothing.
I had wanted him for a long time, but I realized now that it wasn’t in the right way.
He was popular but never returned my affections, which only seemed to make me want him more.
Now, having affection freely given, I realized where I’d gone wrong. I was looking for the wrong thing.
“I’m sorry,” I murmured, turning to face him. “I was jealous that you never looked at me. I shouldn’t have acted as I did.”
Verus’s smile tempered, and he looked me over with a calculating expression. “I’m surprised you held on for so long when the man meant for you was standing beside you.”
I winced at the accuracy of his words. “I’ll admit I was a fool for not noticing him sooner. I have loved him for a long time. I just…”
“Didn’t know you had that option?” he offered when the words failed me. When I nodded, he asked, “If you had noticed, would you have even looked at me?”
“No.” It took no thought at all to answer that question.
Saneth had been by my side since we were children.
If I’d known he was an option, I never would have considered anyone else.
“He’s my brokkul. My heart bond. If I had known he felt the way he did, I never would have considered anyone else.
” I sighed, rubbing at the back of my neck.
“I just wish I could get him to believe that.”
Verus’s eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”
“He believes his love is one-sided. That I couldn’t feel the same because he has wanted me longer. I do not know how to prove otherwise.”
“Do you? Feel the same way?” he asked curiously.
“I have always loved him. I just didn’t realize how deeply until he nearly walked away.”
Verus nodded slowly, his expression thoughtful. “Have you asked him to bond with you? If you want him to realize you feel the same way, that might be the way to do it.”
My stomach flipped at the thought. To be bonded to Saneth would be… everything.