Chapter 5
Five
SANETH
Yamileth was hard at work in the cooking tent when Patrick and I arrived.
He rushed out his apologies and wouldn’t settle until she squeezed his cheeks in that way that always made him melt.
He’d told me how he loved that she was affectionate with him.
His own parents had barely looked at him his whole life.
They hadn’t even acknowledged his achievement when he opened his bakery.
I was glad he’d found his way here. It was better for him.
When Yamileth’s attention swung to me, I prepared myself for whatever task she would demand of me. She didn’t trust just anyone to assist her, but she’d said I was proficient in preparing the simple things. Enough that she insisted I help if I came to visit.
“So?”
Staring at her, I frowned. “So?”
“What happened?”
Heat tinged my cheeks, but I supposed I owed her the story. She, Patrick, and Finn were all there to support me when I needed it.
“We… we are together. He says he wants me and—”
She waved that away, aggravation appearing on her face. “I know that part. We all saw the kiss. I want to know what happened after. Patrick made us leave before the good part.”
A choked sound escaped me, and Patrick slapped a palm against his forehead, his shoulders shaking from suppressed laughter. Unwilling to share what had happened inside Tavik’s tent, I instead asked, “You saw? How?”
“We followed you,” she answered without an ounce of shame. “You think I would miss it? You two have been dancing around each other for years. I wanted to see how things turned out.”
“Yami,” Patrick chastised, still fighting a smile. When he looked at me, he shrugged apologetically. “I wanted to be sure you were okay. In case things went wrong. But we left after the kiss to give you privacy.”
Yamileth scoffed, heading for the pot over the fire and checking it with a watchful eye. “I knew it wouldn’t go wrong. Tavik is an idiot but not blind. Once he realized Saneth’s feelings, I knew he would come to his senses.”
“Hey,” I protested with a frown. No one was allowed to talk about Tavik like that.
Except maybe me, but that was only because he knew I spoke in jest. Besides, he wasn’t an idiot.
He was a great fighter and a wonderful protector.
Yamileth only made those comments in defence of Patrick, and Tavik had already apologized.
Yamileth snorted, drawing my attention off thoughts of Tavik. “Look at you. Already defending him when just yesterday you were cursing him for not noticing you. Love does funny things to those caught in its web.”
I hummed, accepting the basket of vegetables that needed preparing.
I sat on a stool next to Patrick, my thoughts on Tavik.
Last night had been everything I had ever wanted, but I was still afraid it would slip through my fingers.
He had been upfront about his desires, as well as his refusal to hide what we were together, but that didn’t mean it would be forever.
He could just be fooling around. It wouldn’t have been the first time.
We’d practiced kissing when we were teens, so when we eventually found partners, we would be proficient.
Silly acts like that were what led me to realize my attraction to him in the first place.
Patrick’s hand on my shoulder drew my focus, and he tipped his head curiously. “What’s wrong?”
I shook my head. I didn’t want to talk about it. For now, I wanted to enjoy what I had. I distracted him by asking, “How did it go with Verus? Did you ask him to claim you?”
His freckled cheeks turned bright red as he nodded, his smile shy but pleased. “Yes. We’ll have a bonding ceremony after the adoption.”
My brows snapped together in confusion. “Adoption?”
Yamileth made a tsk sound as she took the plants I’d already prepared and tossed them into the pot.
“Orthorr was being stubborn. Other clan leaders, unwilling to adapt to change, swayed his mind. To allow Patrick to stay and bond properly with Verus, I will adopt him into my family. He will take over for me in feeding the clan when the time is right.”
Tears swam in Patrick’s eyes, but not unhappy ones.
He had not been accepted by his own family.
That Yamileth would go so far as to bring him into hers probably meant a great deal.
I admit I’d been worried about what would happen.
When I’d first approached Patrick about bonding with Verus, I’d hoped they’d be forced to leave to be together properly, giving Tavik a chance to get over his affections more easily.
Now that we were friends, I’d been worried that would still be the outcome. I was glad he would stay.
Reaching out a hand, I clasped his forearm and pulled him into a hug, patting his back with my free hand.
“Congratulations, my friend. I’m pleased you will be joining our clan.
And grateful someone other than Yamileth will be in charge of meals.
I don’t have to worry so much about you putting anything in my food when you’re cross,” I teased, ducking with a laugh when Yamileth swatted at me.
“Brat. Why are you here? I would have thought you’d be all over your man now that he opened his eyes,” she demanded.
I lifted a shoulder. “I was last night. I do not want to overwhelm him just because we are sleeping together.”
Something about my reply made her pause, and she narrowed her eyes at me. “Just sleeping together?”
Again, I shrugged. I didn’t have an answer to that. And I still didn’t want to know.
TAVIK
With Patrick’s welcoming ceremony and then Verus bonding with him, I couldn’t find the right time to ask Saneth to bond with me.
We were with each other every night and most days, unless our duties required us to separate, but it never felt like the right time.
I tried to show him, without words, what he meant to me, but I still saw flashes of insecurity on his face whenever it was brought up in teasing comments with our friends or conversations with Finn and Patrick.
I spent each night with him in my arms, looking at him, wishing I could come up with the words and failing to find the right ones.
Frustration over my hesitance affected my mood, and Saneth always knew when I was upset.
He usually teased me and played until I snapped out of it, but he seemed unwilling to do so now that we were together.
We were both struggling with our new dynamic for different reasons, and I wished sometimes for things to go back to the way they were.
When I was stressed like this, I always spoke with my best friend.
But who did I speak to when my frustration was because of my best friend?
“Why the long face?” Godr asked as he dropped onto the log beside me. Saneth sat nearby with Patrick, deep in conversation, but we were both avoiding each other tonight. The awkward tension was becoming unbearable.
“It’s nothing,” I grumbled under my breath, training my eyes on the fire to keep myself from staring at Saneth. I would annoy him if I did it as often as I wished.
Godr usually didn’t push. The horsemaster of our clan was easygoing and patient. Tonight, though, he grabbed my arm and dragged me out of my seat without a word, pulling me over to where a few of my fellow warriors stood talking.
“Well?” Khaul demanded.
Godr shook his head. “He says it’s nothing.”
Feigrind raised an eyebrow, and Bhortis scoffed. “Then why does he look as though someone tore down his tent?”
All four gave me expectant looks, and I felt my frustration rise. “I do not wish to speak of it.”
“And yet, you will anyway,” Khaul said firmly. “Your mind is clouded. It will distract you if you’re needed in battle. Speak your mind, Tavik. What bothers you?”
A part of me wished to walk away, but he had a point. I couldn’t let myself be distracted, not when I usually fought alongside Saneth in all the battles. I needed to be at my best to protect him like he did for me.
“I wish to bond with Saneth, but I don’t know how to ask. He doesn’t believe me when I tell him he is my other half, and I worry he won’t accept.”
Instead of teasing like I expected, they all looked thoughtful. Bhortis was the first to speak, asking, “Has he said he is interested in bonding?”
I shook my head. “He has not mentioned it.”
“If he’s worried about Tavik’s sincerity, he might not want to bring it up,” Feigrind pointed out. “Did you jest about it at any point to make him think you were not serious?”
My expression flattened. “You all jested enough for me. He believed I was bothered by the idea because I argued against you for so long.”
To their credit, they looked abashed. Godr rubbed the back of his neck, giving me an awkward smile. “Sorry. In our defence, we didn’t actually know there were feelings there. It was innocent teasing.”
And I knew that. It only ever bothered me because it looked like it bothered Saneth. When he’d explained his reasoning, I realized I’d gone about it wrong, but I couldn’t take it back. There was no changing the past.
“I don’t think that matters,” a feminine voice said behind us. Khaul moved to allow his bondmate into our little circle, putting his arm around her shoulders protectively.
Cocking my head, I asked, “What do you mean?”
“You two have always jested. I don’t think Saneth would get caught up in that kind of talk. You’re focusing on the wrong thing.”
Khaul smiled down at his bondmate, his voice tinged with affection. “Explain it to us, wise healer. What are we missing?”
She poked his side in retribution, a smile on her lips, and shook her head before giving her full attention to me.
“He has wanted you for a long time. We all saw it. If you ask him to bond with you, he won’t say no.
You just have to do it in a way that feels sincere.
In a way that means something to the two of you. ”
“Like what?” I pressed. “Nothing has felt right so far.”
“I can’t answer that for you,” she replied, giving me an understanding smile when my shoulders slumped. “You need to think about you and Saneth. What’s important to the two of you? What made you fall for each other?”
My mind flicked back to Saneth’s story about me protecting him. We always had each other’s backs. It was what made us two parts of a whole in my eyes. Without him, I would have lost my life in battle before now, and I knew it was the same for him.
Zoya pointed at me, raising her eyebrows. “That. Whatever first crossed your mind. That’s what is most important. Use it and come up with a plan. And remember, no matter what, he’ll say yes.”
I hoped she was right.