Chapter 22
Twenty-Two
UTTIN
Ihad never been more terrified than when I’d seen Zakai running toward the enemy.
Whether he was running to stop them or running away from the clan, it didn’t matter to me.
He was in danger, and I couldn’t stop myself from going after him.
Even when arrows were pointed in my direction and the battalion moved forward, I couldn’t stop. I had to get to him.
I hadn’t expected things to go as well as they did.
After things settled and proper introductions were made, we moved to the receiving tent where food and tea were delivered.
The king and queen’s attendants brought pillows for them to sit on that were fancier than ours, as well as a rug to put them upon.
Queen Raiza waved that off, sitting beside her son and holding his hand, her smile relieved as she petted his hair and touched his cheek.
Zakai took her attentions indulgently, but he looked afraid.
He had ever since I mentioned how much he reminded me of his mother.
I got the feeling I’d said something wrong.
Simon begrudgingly sat beside Orthorr and Bren, ready to translate if I could not.
He never quite got along with Orthorr, despite saving his life.
Simon wasn’t big on authority figures. He only listened when he wished to.
Or when Feigrind asked him to be nice. Since Feigrind stood only a few feet behind his bondmate, I assumed it was his request that led Simon to join us.
Orthorr cleared his throat, putting his fist across his chest and bowing his head toward the monarchs. “King Zohaib, Queen Raiza. It is an honor to meet you. I am Orthorr, leader of the Northern clan. And this is Bren, leader of Clan Urthazrak, our allies who came to visit just before you arrived.”
King Zohaib looked suspicious, but Queen Raiza greeted Orthorr with a polite smile. “It is nice to meet you, clan leader. Tell me, how did my son end up in your care? And why was he not returned to us?”
Zakai flinched, and I could tell he didn’t want to share the details with his parents. He’d confessed to me once that he was embarrassed by how easily he was duped by his guard and the advisor. Admitting to his parents that he trusted the wrong people wouldn’t be easy for him.
Reaching for him, I squeezed the opposite hand to the one his mother held. Once again, a flash of horror crossed his expression, but he smothered it, giving me a tight smile before speaking up to explain what happened to his parents.
“It was Hameed. He and the advisor we were meeting with tricked me, forcing me to sign the trade agreement with a knife to my throat.” His voice quieted as he admitted, “I thought they would release me once I did, which was foolish now that I think about it. Instead, they had me handed off to the barbarians as a tribute. Since we shared no languages, it took a while before a translator was found and my identity revealed.”
“We would have brought him home right away,” Orthorr added through Simon.
“But we were hit with a storm, and it was unsafe to move him until after it passed. He had a series of misfortunes that dragged out his time here, and just this morning we made the decision to wait until the weather warmed to avoid him being cold on the journey.”
Zakai flinched again, his expression sheepish when his mother turned slowly to look at him. “You would have dragged out my suffering, worried you were dead, because you didn’t want to be chilled?” she asked in a deadly tone.
He gave an awkward laugh, releasing my hand to rub at the back of his neck.
“It was more than chilled, Mother. The snow was so high, the tents were half buried. I was told it was possible another storm would pass before we were far enough south to avoid it. I figured waiting was better than truly winding up dead.”
Her eyes were narrowed suspiciously, but she seemed to accept his words. I didn’t. I knew better. But I also knew better than to expose his lies to his parents.
“They did not hurt you?” King Zohaib demanded.
I could tell Orthorr held his breath, but Zakai immediately shook his head. “No. They have been kind to me since I arrived. The rumors about the clans are falsehoods. They are not bad people.”
He shot an accusing look at one of the king’s guards who rolled his eyes and ignored him. I questioned the interaction but kept quiet for now. I would ask Zakai later what it was about. If I had the chance, that was.
Realization hit me hard. If Zakai’s family was here, they would take him with them when they left.
They could choose to leave tonight and there was nothing I or anyone else could do to stop them.
My heart that I’d tried to carefully guard the longer I spent with Zakai broke at the thought, and my lungs froze in my chest.
“Well, we thank you for protecting our son and providing him hospitality. If you’ll allow us one night to rest, we will leave in the morning to bring our son home.”
Orthorr nodded, oblivious to my turmoil. “We would be honored to host you for the evening. A feast will be prepared for all. For now, we will give you time to speak with your son.”
I felt disconnected as I rose to my feet, giving the royals a warrior’s bow before following the two clan leaders out of the receiving tent to give them privacy.
Orthorr let out a breath of relief, but I couldn’t focus on his words.
It felt as though my heart was torn and a piece of it would be leaving when Zakai walked away.
I should have stayed away from him. I’d done this to myself.
“Uttin!”
My mother’s voice broke through the stupor, and I forced myself to look up at her. Her brow furrowed as she came close, tipping her head to study me. “I was going to ask before, but… is everything alright?”
Aware that Orthorr stood nearby, I didn’t answer her. Not until she dragged me to my tent where my father waited to speak with me privately.
“My son, what is the matter?”
“The prince of Al Nuzem was my tribute. And it pains me to see him go.”
ZAKAI
As soon as the barbarians left the tent, my mother rounded on me. “Tell me the truth. Did they force you to lie with them? I’ve heard the rumors and—”
Taking her hands before she could launch into a tirade, I cut her off with a shake of my head. “No, Mother. No one forced me to do anything.”
Father’s eyes narrowed. “But you did lie with them.”
I swallowed hard, shrinking away from his shrewd stare. “I…”
Mother let out a gasp, eyes widening in surprise. “Is that… Is that why you haven’t accepted a bride? Zakai! How could you not tell us?”
I’d hoped I could get away with not having this conversation with them, that I could pretend nothing had happened, but even if Uttin hadn’t said what he said or held my hand to support me, they would have figured it out eventually.
Because I saw how pained Uttin was as he walked away, and it tore my heart asunder.
I wanted to go to him more than I wanted to speak with my parents, despite our long separation.
I wasn’t sure how long I would last keeping my distance from him.
Father moved off his pillow, taking the one Uttin had sat on before so that they sat on either side of me. Putting his hand on mine, he gave me a reassuring smile. “Who you choose to lie with is none of my business. In all honesty, I would prefer not to know.”
“Zohaib!” Mother scolded, but Father just shrugged.
“What? Are you saying you wish to know about our son’s bedroom life?”
Their teasing lifted a weight off my shoulders I’d carried for years. I looked between them with a frown, truly taking in their words. “Are you saying… Would you truly allow it?”
“Of course we would,” Mother insisted, squeezing my other hand.
“But… you’ve been pushing me toward all those women…”
She threw her hands up, exasperated. “Well, if I had known of your interests, I would have introduced you to young men instead! How was I supposed to know?”
Stunned, I gaped at her. While it was true that I’d never told them, I still couldn’t comprehend that they would accept my interests so easily.
Father, after taking in my expression, patted my hand.
“You are not the crown prince, expected to pass down the family line. And even if your brother was so inclined, we would not force him to choose otherwise. He could always adopt if his interests lay with men. We are a country of acceptance, my son. Why would we accept for our citizens what we could not accept for our own children?”
I was at a loss for words. I’d expected the worst for so long, I didn’t know how to wrap my head around their words.
I wanted to ask about Uttin and convince them to let me keep him, but I didn’t want to push them too far.
They had been worried for me for so long.
Discussing the barbarian that had captured my attention… The timing felt wrong.
“How did you find me?”
Mother blew out an exasperated breath, and Father looked irritated as he explained, “It was not easy. Hameed told us your company was attacked on the return home and your life was lost, but your body could not be recovered. This was suspicious to me, as it is his duty to return you to us. Abdul was horrified and left immediately to search for your remains. It took a week before he returned with Umaira.”
Relief flooded me, and I tightened my grip on his hand. “She is alive?” I breathed.
He nodded, but his expression didn’t lighten.
“She is under house arrest. Her story did not match Hameed’s.
We did not know who to believe. And when we asked for Hameed so that he could explain himself, he was gone.
Snuck out in the night. We had not thought to keep our eye on him because no one had returned with him and dissented with his story. ”
“Umaira did nothing wrong!” I argued. “There were too many! She could not have saved me even if she tried! It was two against dozens!”
“Shhh, my heart,” Mother soothed, petting my arm. “She is unharmed. Just being watched for now. She told us you were sold to the barbarians and agreed to stay under arrest until we found you and confirmed her story. She is not being treated ill.”
My shoulders slumped in relief. Like I didn’t blame the barbarians, I didn’t blame Umaira either. Had she not done what was needed to stay alive, my parents would never have known to look for me.
“Did you send someone to look for Hameed?” I asked.
Father nodded. “We sent our best spy to find him, but most of our men came with us. We searched for you in each barbarian clan until we came to this one. There were only two left we had not searched. They took you far from us, my son.”
Chuckling, I lifted a shoulder. “There is a teacher here who helps the tributes learn the language. Most of the clans bring tributes here for lessons before sending them to their clan.”
Not that I would have gone to another clan if asked. Nothing would have taken me from Uttin.
Mother looked confused, frowning at me. “What’s a tribute?”