Chapter 23
Twenty-Three
ZAKAI
It took time to explain the clan to my parents.
They were shocked to know the clans only produced male babies and had to create a treaty with the towns to meet females.
It disgusted them that fear and prejudice prevented them from being able to interact and meet naturally.
When I told them the dangers same-gendered relationships faced in the towns, they were both horrified.
And grateful I was sent somewhere safe for me to be myself.
I didn’t want to overwhelm them, so when a few from the clan came in with refreshments, I excused myself. I wanted to see Uttin.
He wasn’t nearby like I’d expected. The entire time I’d been here, he’d been like my shadow. I needed only to turn around to find him. Only when he was training did he leave my side, and then it was me who stuck close to watch him and drool.
I was growing concerned when I decided to check the fighter’s fire.
He only ever went there to train, but I’d assumed with my family visiting that he would skip it.
Instead, I found him with Simon’s bondmate, swords clashing as they sparred.
Simon stood nearby with his arms crossed and a frown on his face.
When I stopped beside him, he leaned his shoulder against mine but avoided my eye.
“Is it wrong that I don’t want you to go?” he murmured after a moment.
“Is it wrong that I still don’t want to go?” I shot back.
His smile when he finally looked at me was sympathetic and a little sad. “You have no choice?”
I shrugged. “I haven’t asked. I didn’t want to overwhelm them.” I paused for a long moment, watching Uttin and Feigrind’s dancing movements. “They responded well to my interests. It feels like too much to hope they would let me stay too.”
With an unhappy sigh, he tossed an arm around my shoulders in a side hug. “I guess. But they accepted you, right? That’s good. You have a chance at happiness at the very least.”
No, I wasn’t sure I agreed with that. After a month wrapped in Uttin’s embrace, it was hard to imagine finding happiness elsewhere.
I stayed out there with Simon, watching the two men fight until a barbarian came looking for me to return to my parents. Uttin was summoned as well, but I assumed Orthorr was looking for him. There was a lot going on in the clan at the moment, and Uttin was the clan second.
The silence between us was strained as we headed toward the village center together. I wanted to reach for him, to ask him what he was thinking, but his expression was so closed off, I didn’t know what words to say.
I looked at him again before stepping into the receiving tent, surprised when Orthorr shooed Uttin to follow me. We both shared a confused frown but still did not say a word to each other. We stepped inside the tent, and Uttin came up short when he noticed the woman sitting beside my mother.
“Mother?” he questioned with a growing frown.
“Wait a minute. Mother?” I whipped around to look at him, then back to my own mother who had a wicked look in her eye I didn’t trust. She’d taught me that look. I knew how it was used.
“Sit,” Mother insisted, pointing to the pillows in front of them.
I did, asking, “What’s going on?”
“There is something we must discuss. I have learned a great deal about the clans and how they work. I believe their lifestyle is unsustainable. As such, I discussed with Melinda the possibility of an alliance.”
That wasn’t what I was expecting, though I had hoped to discuss something of that nature with them later. It seemed a fitting exchange for the care the clan provided me.
“That’s… good,” I replied, still frowning. “Why did you ask for us?”
Uttin’s mother answered this, speaking in my language with near fluency. It surprised both me and Uttin, who gaped at her.
“Alliances like this are usually tied through marriage. It is our intention to continue this tradition.”
“With who?” Uttin and I demanded at the same time.
“With the two of you.”
Heat flushed my cheeks, and I could only stare as they continued their explanation.
“It is contingent upon Uttin becoming clan leader. That way his station will be the same as Zakai’s.” Melinda gave her son a pointed look, and he sucked in a breath, straightening.
“You will also be required to travel home at least once a year. There are politics with alliances, and you are required to participate.” That time, I got the pointed look from my mother.
I had put in a great effort to keep a straight face.
Was it my fault the tutor for our political science lessons was a bore?
Hope started to swell in my chest as they continued their list of requirements. I’d never considered marriage before, mostly because I was too busy avoiding the idea of marrying a woman. But with Uttin? I could perhaps agree to that. If he did.
UTTIN
I should have known the moment I confessed my feelings to my mother she would do anything in her power to see me happy. She’d been pestering me to settle down for ages. If she saw an opportunity, she was going to take it.
That she was ballsy enough to approach a queen of a foreign nation shouldn’t have surprised me either.
It didn’t surprise me that she was persuasive enough to pull it off, though.
She was the matriarch of Clan Urthazrak because despite Bren’s position, most of the clan looked to my mother for advice. My father always bragged about that.
I itched to look at Zakai and understand his feelings on the matter. Did he wish to stay with me? Was pinning an alliance on our marriage as good a thing to him as it was to me? Or was I forcing him to stay because I imagined he didn’t want to go?
My mother seemed to know what I was thinking because she smiled softly at me. “We will allow the two of you to discuss it. I have invited Queen Raiza to sit by the communal fire and get to know the clan. I will act as translator.”
Standing because it was ingrained in me to do so, I offered them both a hand to help them rise, blinking rapidly when the queen patted my cheek affectionately as she passed.
The king had been with Orthorr when I went to speak with him, so Zakai and I were now alone.
A silence fell over us as they left. Zakai hadn’t moved from his place on the cushion, his gaze avoiding mine.
“Tavi…” I began, my heart aching with the fear that I could still lose him. Unless I could convince him to accept this life, which I knew was nowhere near as extravagant as his life in the palace, he would be taken from me.
When he looked up at me, I worried I imagined the hope in his eyes. Moving to kneel in front of him, I cupped his cheek like I had since we became intimate. “I will not force you. You deserve the life you want. But…”
“But what?” he whispered, shifting to his knees.
We were inching toward each other, and his gaze was locked on my mouth, like he wished to see the words formed on my lips.
“Stay. I wish for you to stay. Not only for an alliance, but for me. I—”
He cut me off, throwing himself at me and fusing his lips to mine.
He’d launched himself with such force that he knocked me onto my back.
I groaned into the kiss, fisting his hair as I took over.
A full-body shiver wracked him, and he mewled as I tugged a little.
My sweet prince liked a little manhandling.
It was a good thing because once I started with him, I lost my head a little.
Before things could get out of hand, I pulled him away, whispering against his lips. “I need your words, tavi. Tell me what you want.”
“I want to stay. I want you.”
Relief and pride hit me at once, leaving me dizzy.
I yanked Zakai back to me, kissing him fiercely.
He responded much the same, fingers digging into my hair, tongue tangling with mine.
I wanted more than anything to roll him beneath me and strip his clothes off, but I doubted our mothers would wait that long for our answer. It would have to wait.
Zakai did not agree. He tugged at my legwear demandingly, arching his back when I pulled his wrists above his head. I chuckled against his lips, nipping at him and drawing a gasp from him.
“Our mothers will return soon, kolrav. You do not wish them to see us in such a state, do you?”
He growled, still not used to not getting his way. As my bondmate, I would do my best to give him whatever he wanted, but admitting that I intended to spoil him seemed like a bad idea. It was better to let him figure it out himself.
Sure enough, our families were waiting after we came out of the receiving tent. My mother’s eyes lit up when she saw our entwined hands, and when we moved to join them, she demanded, “Well?”
“We accept your proposal.”
She tittered, waving her hand at me. “It’s not my proposal that you need to worry about, son of mine. Apparently, in Al Nuzem, the proposal is a grand thing. You have work to do.”
Zakai hummed, a slow grin overtaking his face. “I get the feeling I’m going to like your mother,” he said, crossing a hand at his waist and bowing low in the custom of Al Nuzem. “Greetings, my lady. I’m grateful to you and my mother for this opportunity.”
When he straightened and noticed my stunned expression, he frowned. “What?”
“You can be polite? Since when?”
Both our mothers let out startled laughs, while Zakai looked mortified. Mortified and indignant. “You’re gonna get it for that!”
I grinned wickedly, releasing my hold on his hand to beckon him. “Show me what you’ve got, tavi.”
He lunged at me, but I saw it coming. Dipping low enough that his stomach hit my shoulder, I tossed him over it, holding him like a sack of potatoes. He squawked in protest, legs kicking until I binded my arms around his legs to still him.
“Uttin!”
Chuckling, I asked in my most bored tone, “Yes?”
“Put me down.”
“No.”
He froze as I gave back the same response he loved to give me while he was learning my tongue. It felt good to give back to him the treatment that he’d gifted me.
“Uttin!”
Shrugging my shoulder and making him bounce, I gave our mothers a concerned frown. “He is so light. I must feed him more to fatten him up.”
That got another squawk of protest and more wiggling.
Zakai launched into a tirade in his own tongue too fast and complicated for me to keep up with.
But we all understood his tone, and the clan laughed at the predicament he found himself in.
He could complain all he wanted. He’d agreed to be mine.
I wasn’t going to let go until I absolutely had to.