Chapter 25
Chapter Twenty-Five
Andi
This morning's meeting with the team's manager and the CFO went well. They were both men. Both receptive to my presence here, as far as I could tell.
At any rate, they hadn't been rude or condescending. That was a good sign. They were dedicated to the team, that was what mattered. That would be the glue that held us altogether.
I pushed in earbuds and put on the latest album from Jack Clutterbuck, my favorite pop singer, before opening my email and checking for anything important.
After deleting several requests from Nigerian princes to send me large sums of money, I moved on to actual email. None of which was too urgent. I moved them into folders and sat at my desk, grooving quietly to the music.
A hint of movement in the doorway caught my eye, stopping me mid-groove.
A giant teddy bear appeared, held up by male hands.
A slow smile crept onto my face. I remembered Cam suggesting he win one for me at the pier before we went on the rollercoaster instead. He must have decided I needed one anyway.
I pulled out my earbuds and tossed them onto the desk. Smiling, my heart racing, I rose and stepped towards the teddy bear.
“He's adorable.”
“Of course he is.” The voice behind the bear made me freeze. A moment later, the plush animal was lowered, revealing a familiar, but not so welcome, face.
“Xander.” I should have noticed his sleeves. He wore an expensive suit, not a sweatshirt. I hadn't looked past the large brown teddy. I'd seen what I wanted to see, not what was really there.
Although, I should have anticipated my ex-boyfriend turning up unannounced like this. Just when life was going well, he appeared to remind me of past screw-ups .
“What are you doing here?”
His hair was slightly longer, but his chin was perfectly smooth as always. His eyes, brown with a hint of green, always held a hint of superiority. Like whatever I knew, he knew just that bit more. It was always there, but I hadn't noticed it until now.
“Andi, you look lovely.” He placed the teddy on the couch and moved to kiss my cheek before I could step away. “I thought it was time we talked.”
I retreated back a couple of feet. “I don't know what we have to talk about.”
Now that he wasn't hidden behind a teddy bear, I could see the perfectly tailored navy suit, crisp white shirt and perfectly knotted silk tie. He was a couple of inches shorter than Cam, with a more slender build.
He was undeniably handsome, but to look at him now, I couldn't remember why I was attracted to him.
He gave a short laugh. “Of course we do. I'm sure you've had a lot of time to think during our break.”
I frowned at him. “Break? You left. Without saying a single word about it to me. One day you were there and the next you weren’t.” I gestured from one side of me, to the other. “What was there to think about? You made your feelings abundantly clear.”
He stepped towards me. “Evidently, I should have come sooner. Although, I would have thought you'd reach out to me.”
“Why would I have done that?” I stood my ground. I wasn't going to let him intimidate me.
“You must have understood why I did it.” He seemed genuinely confused.
“Because you didn't want to be with me anymore.” I raised my left shoulder and dropped it. “Why else would you leave without a word?”
“I wanted you to realize what we had. What life apart would be like,” he said. “Now you've experienced it, it's time to end our break. Before you do something you might regret.”
Was that what this was about? He'd seen the photos of me and Cam and came crawling back now he realized someone else wanted me.
“What might I regret?” I said, my tone icy. “Moving on with my life? Discovering that you and I were over a long, long time ago? My only regret was not ending it before you did.”
He clicked his tongue. “Don't be ridiculous, Andi. If you need a little more time, I can give you another week or two. But you have to understand that if anyone sees you with someone else again, it will reflect badly on me.”
I stared at him. I shouldn't even be slightly surprised that the only thing he gave a shit about was his reputation.
“What Cam and I do is none of your business,” I said. “You made that abundantly clear when you packed up and left.”
“People are talking, Andi,” he said warningly. “People I work with are talking about me behind their hands. They knew we were together and planned to have a life with each other, and now you're off doing fuck knows what with some…hockey player. Do you have any idea how that looks? It's impacting my next promotion. The partners are concerned my girlfriend might cause a scandal.”
“Good thing I'm not your girlfriend then,” I snapped. “Did you bother to inform them of that? Or did you assure them you'd come here and I'd fall in line? Be the dutiful wife like my mother is? Sit around and knit, and wait for you to come home at the end of a long day so I can place a hot meal in front of you?”
“Why not?” He lifted his rounded chin. “You could work for a while if you want to. I know how much you like being busy. When the babies come?— "
I gaped at him. “Xander, there will be no babies. Not between you and me.”
Had he lost his ever loving mind? He must have if he thought we had a future together.
“The best thing you ever did was leave. The moment you stepped out the door, you ended it. It hurt for a little while, but I got over it. I realized it was for the best. For me. For you too, I guess. Now you can find someone who fits in with your nineteen fifties housewife ideal. That sure as hell isn't me.”
I'd lose my shit in the first day or two.
“It was never meant to be an end, Andi,” he insisted. “Like I said, it was a break. I'm not sure what's gotten into you. It must be this place. That hockey player has some kind of influence over you, doesn't he? He has you convinced that the future we planned isn't what you want.”
He shook his head slowly. “I know you better than that. You're better than that.” He closed his eyes for a minute and shook his head, like he was trying to get through to a three-year-old.
“You know people like that don't stick around with one woman for long. The first pretty face that crosses their path and they're off, chasing them like a dog in heat.” He opened his eyes. “Don't say you don't know that's true. We both know it is. ”
From what I'd seen, for some of the players, it was, but not for all of them. Not for Cam. He wasn't out to chase pussy.
I shook my head. “You're wrong. That's just a stereotype. Lots of the guys on the team are happily married with children. Committed. They wouldn't look sideways at another woman.”
“They may not, but what about Cameron North?” Xander sneered. “That's his name, isn't it? He seems to keep some dubious company. How many additional endorsements has he received since that incident on the rollercoaster? I'd imagine several, all very lucrative.”
My eyes twitched towards my computer. Several of those emails were regarding endorsement deals for Cam. A couple of them were worth millions. A few of those and he could comfortably retire. But he would have gotten those anyway, wouldn't he? Not because of any relationship with me.
“I see I'm right.” Xander looked smug. “He's doing nothing but using you, and preying on how vulnerable you are right now. I must take some of the blame for that. I should have come to you before he tried anything with you. But I'm here now and we can deal with him. You can file a sexual harassment lawsuit against him. He'll have to…"
He continued talking, but I barely heard him over the blood that roared through my ears.
Was it possible Cam was using me to benefit his own career? I didn't want to consider it, but those endorsement deals told me I had to. The timing was too convenient.
I thought back to how he found me sitting on the bench by the beach. He'd insisted we go to the pier. What if none of that was spontaneous?
What if he knew where to find me and where to take me so we could be seen together? He could have planted the person that took those photos. Hell, he could have recruited his sister to help him. She could have influenced the camera operator to film me eating that hotdog. To generate more publicity around us.
Would he have deliberately humiliated me like that? He couldn't have known I might choke but he might have invited the scrutiny, and the rumors that surfaced after that.
I sat back on the edge of my desk and rubbed my temples. Too many thoughts were thundering around in my brain. Too many insecurities and questions.
I'd wanted so badly to believe him when he told me he was falling in love with me. Was that another part of the plan? Pretty words to suck me in deeper?
I reminded myself that he didn't fuck me when he could have, but the ugliest of my insecurities suggested that was because he didn't want to. Pretending to care about me was one thing, but subjecting his body to mine was another.
“What was with the bear?” The words popped out before I could even think them.
Xander stopped mid-sentence and looked confused.
I repeated the question and nodded toward the teddy bear that sat on the couch watching us, probably judging me. Why wouldn't he? I was certainly judging myself.
“It was delivered to the reception desk near the front door,” Xander finally said. “I said I was coming this way anyway and I'd bring it up for you.”
“You didn't buy it for me,” I stated.
“Of course not.” He looked as though that was the most ridiculous idea he ever heard. “Why would I waste money on something like that?”
“I have no idea,” I said. “It didn't seem like something you'd do.”
“Of course not,” he said again, like I'd just paid him a compliment. “Now?— "
“I have to thank you,” I interrupted. “The time we had together was…interesting. We had some good times in the early days. But you packing up and leaving was a wake-up call. It was a reminder that I should be out living my best life. That isn't with you. It never was and never will be. I honestly wish you happiness. Whatever that means to you.”
“Andi.” He put out a hand to me, but must have seen the expression on my face. He realized I was not only serious, but done. Done with him and his judgment. Done with any plans he thought we should have. Done standing here wasting time talking to him.
He lowered his hand. “If you ever change your mind…"
“I won't. But if you need a friend, maybe we can be that some day.” Spontaneously, I stepped forward and gave him a quick hug.
Over his shoulder, I saw Cam step into the doorway. He saw me standing with my arms around Xander, and turned and walked away.