Chapter 19
CHAPTER NINETEEN
I swallow, pushing everything I’m feeling down into the vast void of darkness within me. Everything about this situation, about Riley, about whatever the fuck is going on in that room. I opt for a new vantage point to people-watch instead.
I swing down from my perch on top of the stable roof and land softly on the sandy dirt in my pocket of darkness.Hearing a loud huff, I make the decision to visit the horses. Applemint wasn’t with me long, but I miss the companionship.
I sneak in and make sure none of the stable kids are around before sticking my head in the first stall to greet the horse inside. A massive sack of broken carrot pieces had sat at the entrance, so I double back for them, making my way around to feed one to each horse.
Their velvet-soft lips and their spiky whiskers bring me joy for a reason I don’t fully understand. After giving each one some attention, I should go, but as I turn to leave, the large chestnut brown pony with fluffy ears nips at my shoulder .
“Sorry, sweet girl, no more carrots,” I whisper as I cuddle into her. She rests her head over my shoulder, allowing me to cuddle her, and I breathe in her musky animal scent while stroking down her long neck.
I’m startled by a laugh that sounds like a duck, much closer than I would like. I had been so transfixed by the pony that I was being a terrible sneak.Realizing I won’t have the opportunity to leave, I slip into the pony’s stall. Crouching behind the partitioned wall, watching through the cracks in the wood, I’m able to see two men enter.
By sheer dumb luck, it’s the Erduborn man from Nemoris Teorann with the duck laugh. Was he following us? It surely cannot be a coincidence that he’s here, even if he is Erduborn.The two men stand inside, near the entrance to the stables.
“Nah, we can’t wait that long,” the man—who I have decided I will call Duckhead—says to his companion. “We’re leaving soon and need to have that cart good to go. Don’t need to be a good one, just needs to get as far as Forsto.”
“Mm. Mm. How much we talkin’? I have a single horse cart that’ll do the trick,” says Duckhead’s companion. “It’s light. Your pony could pull it.”
I hope they don’t intend to get the pony right now, as I’m fairly certain my stall mate is the only pony in the stables. The pony tries to nibble and pull at the fabric covering my feet, reminding me of Applemint’s cheeky spirit.
“I was going to sell her, but that might work better now I think it. Show me. How much?” Duckhead is muttering as he and his companion leave the stable the way they’d come.
I stay long enough I can no longer hear them before giving the pony a little kiss goodbye on her cheek.
“I hope Duckhead treats you well my little friend. Would you tell me if he was up to something nefarious if you could?” She blows a puff of hot air out of her nose in response, and I chuckle.One more kiss and I sneak out of the stable successfully.
I’m standing in my pocket of darkness—deciding whether to go to bed, try to find Duckhead, report to Beans, or find a new spying spot—when the door to Riley’sfriend’sroom opens. A warm beam of light spills out as the woman sticks her head out and looks around. Checking for witnesses, I guess.
With the coast clear, Riley comes out while swinging his jacket on. He kisses the woman on the cheek, and she reaches up with one hand to cup his face and says something softly to him.
Unable to bear the display of affection, or my own volatile emotions beginning to rise, I turn around and melt into the shadows.
I do another perimeter check, seeing if I can find Duckhead or his companion. Seeing what looks like a small, single horse-pulled cart out the front of one of the inn’s rooms, I hoist myself up a tree for a new vantage point, with a full view of the room and cart.
The night passes with no movement, and I need at least a little sleep so I’m not useless tomorrow. I’ll wake up early and come back. Stumbling into my room, I don’t bother taking off my sneaksuit or cleaning the kajal from my face before passing out.
The morning comes much too quickly, though the sun has not yet fully risen. I’m washed, packed, and ready to go, so I leave my bags outside my door as I go to check on the cart. It’s gone, along with the pony from the stable. I can’t be sure when they left, but I hope it’s a good thing that they’ve left before us.
Beans’ lantern light is shining through his window, so I knock gently on his door. Going downstairs together, I decide against telling him about Duckhead. I'm not used to working with a team, and I don’t want to tell any of them. The fact Riley would know I was out sneaking and may have seen him with the Erduborn woman is something I want to avoid.
The kitchen isn’t open, but they offer us some warm oat muffins and fresh fruit. We happily accept, taking portions for the others, too. Tovi and Bitty arrive next, and Tovi has a scowl on her face until she sees the food. She steals a piece of melon from my plate and sticks her tongue out.
“Everyone sleep well?” Tovi asks with a yawn. “You’d think I wouldn’t be tired, seeing as I went to bed before the sun set.” At least it won’t be too obvious how tired I am with everyone having a terrible night’s sleep.
This starts a conversation about how uncomfortable the mattresses were before I’m distracted by Riley sauntering in. He holds my stare, a smile starting to curve his lips before I quickly look away.
“Good morning, my Divine friends!” Riley announces cheerfully as he plonks into the seat across from me.
“Ew, why are you so happy?” Tovi asks in disgust.
With a mouthful of oat muffin, Riley says, “Can’t a man be in a good mood for no reason?”
Riley’s eyes are on me, though I’m discussing training techniques with Bitty. Tovi and Beans are arguing about something, and Bitty joins in, defending Tovi.
I check, and yes, Riley is still looking at me. He leans forward on his elbows, resting his mouth in his hands, though I can see the smirk underneath. Knowing he’s caught my eye finally, he does a double eyebrow wiggle at me, and I frown at him in response. My core is apparently not up to speed about how not interested we are in Riley, the heat sending a flush through me.
What a piece of work. I’m not sure if he’s really that conceited or if he thinks I am an idiot.
As we all gear up and start to file out, Riley leans over and whispers conspiratorially. “You must have fallen asleep quickly last night.” His hand brushes my lower back to try and guide me away from exiting with the others.
“What do you mean?” I ask, confused, moving away from his touch.
“I came to see you…I knocked, but you didn’t answer.”
Still confused and aware that we are the only ones left in the tavern, I ask, “When?”
He laughs, looking slightly unsure of himself. “Last night. I waited about half an hour after you left dinner, and then…” He clears his throat and gestures at nothing before running a hand through his deep red hair with a sheepish grin.
Last night, when I was doing a perimeter check and wasn’t even in my room. So, he did come like I had hoped last night. But when he didn’t find me, he found someone else instead. Catching me off guard, the crash of rage inside my chest almost buckles my knees.
“I’m sure you managed to find other entertainment,” I snap in a whisper, as Tovi yells from outside.
“Are you two dawdling fucks coming or what?”
“Coming!” I call, making a beeline for the door, not waiting for Riley.
That night at camp, after a hard slog in the heat, Riley keeps stealing looks at me. I’ve avoided his eye the entire time, making sure he and I are never alone together, despite how much he keeps trying to orchestrate it.
“I’ll help you cook.” Riley offers in front of everyone, while I turn the skinned hare he caught for our dinner over the fire.
I make a sharp sound out of my mouth. “I think we would like to enjoy our dinner tonight, Riley.”
“I second that, Mika. Riley, it’s not worth it! For us, I mean,” Beans adds, clapping the prince on his shoulders, and Riley elbows him in the ribs.
Tovi, not looking at anyone, sighs in agreement. “I hate to admit it, but I don’t think I’ll ever be able to have camp food that Mika hasn’t made ever again. Riley, I can’t let you ruin this for me.”
“The people have spoken, Riley. You’re to stay five to ten feet away from me and my cooking.”
“I was just trying to help!” Riley whines, not taking his searching eyes off me.
I exaggerate a grimace at him. “Yeh…” I drawl, “I don’t think you try hard enough.”
Riley’s brow furrows as I hold his eye for long enough that he’s confused about what we are really talking about before I quickly dash my eyes away. Beans’ laughter booms about the canyons below us.
“I’m less disappointed about there not being a Gifted finder or someone to see through walls now—Mika is much more entertaining!” Bitty says, trying to stifle a laugh while poking a stick into the fire.
“ What .” Not a question. A demand slices through my teeth.
The jovial air is immediately soured, and all of their faces have dropped from humorous expressions to bewildered at why I’m glaring at Bitty.
“Uh…I just mean that when they came to Osraed to ask for a finder or someone Gifted with seeing through walls, that I’m glad you and your talents were offered instead.” I can see the apprehension and confusion on Bitty’s face as they’re speaking, eyes darting around, seeking backup and support from the others.
“Was Hastieni unavailable for hire? Or did you want someone permanent?” I’m surprised at how breathless I sound.
Now Bitty’s face is confused. “Who’s Hastieni?”
Blowing slowly out of my nose and trying not to lose my temper entirely, I explain through gritted teeth. “Hastieni is the Ofosraed Gifted finder for hire. Was he unavailable, or were you looking for someone to purchase and not hire? Why did you ask for me?” Though Hastieni is an item finder, I am sure he would have been of some use.
“We didn’t ask for you, we didn’t even realize that Osraed had a finder for hire. The council president suggested you specifically, after we explained what we needed,” Beans offers in his smooth baritone that suddenly grates on my nerves. He sounds far too calm when a storm is raging inside my chest and ears.
“No. You asked for me, and the council voted to allow the sale.” I state this as fact, though I can hear the fallacy of it as it unravels on my tongue.
Silence.
After far too many heartbeats, Beans speaks, softer than I imagined he could with that deep voice. “Mika, we had no idea who you were. President Jaena said she had a Null that was an excellent sneak with exceptional fighting abilities who we could purchase, albeit for more gold than we had planned on spending. She said you had the perfect skill set, even for a Null. We agreed, got the queen’s seal to sign the bill of sale, and then said we’d be back in five days to collect you. As far as I am aware, there wasn’t a vote.”
I don’t remember when I stood up. I’m staring at the fire, trying not to look at anyone, so they cannot see the pure and unbridled fury dancing like the flames in my eyes, though my fisted hands would give me away.
“Does this mean you had no idea who you were actually purchasing? The reason why I was worth more gold than a typical Null?”
Riley speaks for the first time. “What do you mean ‘who’? We knew your name from the bill of sale, and your abilities were detailed by the president. We knew who you were.”
“She means you didn’t know you had purchased the Silent Assassin,” Tovi says, picking her nails with a knife and not looking up.
Bitty openly gapes at Tovi, and then me. “ You’re the Silent Assassin?” Bitty says with an endearing amount of childlike excitement, before whipping their head back around to accuse Tovi. “And you knew ?!”
The barest of shrugs lifts Tovi’s shoulder as she raises one of her sharp eyebrows at Bitty.
I’m pacing. My skin is prickled and on fire. My heart is beating like it’s trying to escape my chest so it can self-immolate in the campfire. “You purchased the most hated and feared assassin in all of the Divine world, and you didn’t even know it?” I’m not speaking to anyone directly, and every word I say is a sucker punch to my own stomach. “You didn’t know. You haven’t known this whole time.” I’m rambling now, trying to piece together everything while a fog of fury starts to choke me.“I have to…I need to…”
“Do you want to spar? ”
I spin myself back to look at Riley, who is already standing, and gives me a nod to direct me behind him.
Beans growls. “Riley…”
“Yes.” Without looking at anyone or giving Beans time to throw a wet blanket onto what I know I need right now, I stride directly through them toward the clearing Riley gestured to.