Chapter 23 Velra #2
“You were caged by a megalomaniacal, rigid system that policed every single move you made, every decision. You were an agent of the Celestial Plane, a warrior bred to do their bidding. You haven’t lived a life either.
You’d existed as an extension of them, not even as an actual person.
You’re free of their shackles now, yet you’re allowing this to be another set you live with. ”
“Saving you, I forced the Soul Brand upon you and—”
“Stop. You didn’t know that was going to happen. You saved my life, Cassius.”
“And you then saved mine months later.”
“That’s not my point. The fact is that the Soul Brand exists and it’s time we stopped pretending it doesn’t, that it’s some inconvenience.”
“You say that, but you would be inundated with all my… issues. It could hurt you.”
“Hurt me, huh?”
“Yes.”
I eased the towel from his neck, noting that the bleeding had finally ceased.
I flicked it into the bathroom and cleansed it with my magic, then I reached out to him with both hands.
“You believe your current stance regarding us has spared me from this hurt that you’re worried about…
open your mind to me, let me show you something.
It’s a recurring dream that I’ve had ever since you pulled away so unceremoniously. And brutally, honestly.”
He looked unsure, but he gave a nod. “All right.”
I pressed my palms to either side of his head, then carefully pushed the memory of my dream into him, being extra gentle about it with him in a weakened state.
My purple power sparked and he tensed just as I made the connection.
And then the memory flowed into him.
“Cassius,” I breathed.
The one who’d saved me.
Former True Celestial and now a Fallen.
He was still very much a powerhouse with the body of a warrior god, all broad shoulders and girth, towering with sculpted muscle.
His ethereal white-blond hair brushed the shoulders of his white linen shirt, and his gold leather pants pulled taut across his thick thighs as he strode toward me with all that natural might and commanding presence.
He stopped right in front of me, concern bleeding through. “You don’t belong here.”
“What?” I rasped.
“We’ve done this, little shadow.”
“I… I don’t understand.”
“You shouldn’t be here. You are beyond this.” He gestured around at the shadows that had partially retreated, but still remained in our vicinity. “You are the shadows—these here cannot control you.”
I reached up and cupped his face. “Help me cast them away.”
His eyes shone, need he’d always fought so hard clear as the brightest day now.
Finally.
He dipped his head.
And that was it.
I locked my hands around his neck and rose to it, our mouths clashing.
Fiercely.
Hungrily.
Desperately.
He fisted my hair, tugging and stroking in a delectable way, giving away how wild and unhinged his desire for me was in that moment, how he was barely holding it together.
Because of me.
Because of what I did to him.
Because of what we did to each other.
Sensations so long denied for both of us surged forth like an inferno of uncontrollable passion and need that I could hardly breathe through.
I didn’t want to breathe in this moment.
I just wanted to feel and to feel deeply.
For once.
After so fucking long.
I deepened the kiss and moaned into his mouth as he grasped my thighs and wrapped them around him, hauling me up against him.
And then I was grinding on him, feeling his hard dick right where I needed him.
He gave it right back to me, rubbing me against him roughly, frantically, until sexy rumbling growls were spilling from him, even as he devoured my mouth.
I grasped his shirt, intending to rip the thing off him so I could feel him skin-to-skin.
“Velra,” he choked, suddenly breaking our kiss.
“What are you—”
He put me down and stepped back, and an awful coldness rolled over me again.
“This cannot be.”
“It just was, Cassius.”
“A mistake.”
My gut twisted. “No. It wasn’t. It was far from that.”
“We don’t belong.”
“Don’t. Stop doing this. Every fucking time!” I slammed my hands into his chest and screamed at the top of my lungs, “Stop! Stop! Stop doing this to me!”
He stared at me impassively.
There was nothing there.
I went to scream again, but no sound came out.
I screamed and screamed but it just continued to go unheard.
And then he turned away.
I bolted forward to reach for him, to stop him from leaving yet again.
But a flash of white light swallowed him in a blink.
It was too late.
It was always too late.
As I pulled back, ending the spell, his gaze snapped to mine, a haunted look in his eyes. “Hades,” he uttered. “I didn’t… I didn’t realize.”
“I know you didn’t.”
“How do you not hate me with this being how I made you feel?”
“Because, I get that you don’t have full comprehension of mortal plane emotions, or even of your own because of how deeply you were forced to repress who you are, how you feel, what you need, and what you want.
But with that being the case, you need to recognize that deficiency and defer to somebody else.
You don’t get to take control here, Cassius, especially not when it comes to deciding what’s best for my emotional state. ”
“I hear what you’re saying. I just didn’t want you impacted or restricted, nor controlled, by our Soul Brand.”
“Well, I am. And so are you. Very much so. The time has come to look at this a different way and to approach it a different way as well. How about we stop seeing it as something negative, something that holds us back in this way and that, or through fear? And instead, we see the positives to it?”
“Positives?”
“There’s a safety net here for you with the bond.
Me too when I was so scared to connect with anyone.
But for you, you can feel what I am, which when used properly can help to bridge the gap with your limited ability to interpret emotions.
The Soul Brand offers a safer way and a sort of guiding light to growing closer, which I can tell you actually want.
It’s sort of like a protective bubble from which things can grow beyond once you’re more settled with it.
And, yes, you can assist me with my power issues if something triggers that in me again or sets back my progress, and I’m unable to find control right away.
” I reached out and took his hand. “What we have, this Soul Brand, is a tether to your humanity, Cassius. It’s one of a kind.
It’s special. Let’s stop seeing it as a curse.
” I smiled. “You’re the first person I connected with and that’s no small thing to me.
It actually enabled me to try with Lazriel, then Sylas. It helped me. This Brand helped me.”
“It helped you,” he murmured to himself, clearly trying to reconcile that reality.
“Yes,” I assured him, at his sheer disbelief in something positive coming out of it. It was unbelievably sad that he could only see things that way. I gestured to the bloodied state of him. “Now, with that out there, will you let me change you into some non-soiled clothes with a flick of my magic?”
“That’s why you used the wipes?”
“Yes. Given how you’ve been when it comes to me, I figured you wouldn’t want my magic touching you. My… anything… touching you.”
“That’s not entirely true,” he said, actually squeezing my hand back and surprising the hell out of me. He swallowed hard. “What you showed me of your recurring dream… I want to be that with you. I mean… do that to you… with you.”
I pressed my free hand to his bloodied and torn shirt and with a spark of my purple magic, I had him dressed in clean clothes.
He started and looked down at himself. “It’s the exact same.”
“I thought that would bring you comfort.” I gestured at the beaded bracelet encircling his wrist that was a stark contrast to his otherwise muted attire. “Just like this seems to.” I’d seen him rubbing it every now and then as he’d sat on my bed.
“I suppose it has taken on that function. It was a gift from a couple of the children at Haven Initiative.”
“That’s really sweet.”
“Ketheron has over a dozen of them.”
“You think you’re unlikeable because he has more?”
He lifted a shoulder. “It’s not something I concern myself with.”
Of course it really was.
“He has a way about him that invites those sorts of gifts and so many of them. You wouldn’t have received even one if you weren’t likeable to them. There’s no pretense at their young age. If they’re fond of somebody, it’s made known.”
He took my words in. “I see.”
I chuckled. “You’re more likeable than you think. Especially when you allow people to see beyond that harsher exterior which initially seems unmovable to many. But not to me. I liked you from the first moment we met.”
“When you were suffering from a fatal stab wound and in agony?”
“Yes. The fact I felt that way even then says a great deal, wouldn’t you agree?”
He stared at me then, intensely.
I expected him to avert his gaze, but he actually didn’t.
And then he leaned in.
His lips brushed mine.
Softly, tentatively.
His hand tightened in mine.
I stroked his fingers.
That slight touch did something to him, and then he was grasping my nape and kissing me deeply.
I clutched his bicep as I responded, opening for him as he slid his tongue into my mouth.
It was all-consuming and profoundly erotic as he tasted me, going deeper, harder, groaning into my mouth, then shoving his hands into my hair and fisting it wildly.
And then he was stroking down my body, like he couldn’t feel all the different parts of me and explore fast enough.
It was a heady rush of passion, an implosion of so much that had been held at bay for far too long.
Heat rolled through me, and I was lost to the moment, to the feel of him against me, the taste of him, his sandalwood scent inundating me, as sparks of pleasure did the same.
He broke the kiss, panting, his eyes wide in absolute disbelief.
And then a smile spread over his face.
A full-on, genuine, wide smile.