Chapter Thirty-One
“ W hy not just portal us there?” I asked no one in particular, Bellamy’s hand still wrapped in mine and guiding me forward.
I attempted to tug it back, but he only tightened his grip ever so slightly. The idea of traveling on foot halfway across the Demon Realm—Eoforhild—did not sound appealing in the least, especially in the cold.
Noe appeared at my side, her red cloak blowing back in the light wind. She was in good spirits as we made our way across the grass towards a large wooden structure in the distance. In fact, all of them moved with excitement and energy, a bright ball of light following each of us as we walked.
“We prefer to ride horseback. Ranbir and Winona are both research specialists. Ranbir studies the lands and Winona the creatures of the realm. They are likely the most well versed on their respective fields than anyone else in the world,” Noe explained with a proud tone. “Bellamy actually introduced them to each other, hoping they would work together to catalogue information for him. The sex started fairly soon after,” she said, throwing a wink at the pair.
“That is me, match maker extraordinaire,” the demon prince teased.
Ranbir huffed, a blush creeping onto his dark skin. Henry whooped, smacking the Healer quite firmly on his shoulder, the loud whack echoing in the night. Luca and Cyprus burst into laughter as Winona shot a beam of light at Noe, nearly sending her to the ground. My arm shook slightly, and I saw from the corner of my eye that Bellamy was also laughing softly.
“Really, it is because you cannot portal into Dunamis, there are wards to prevent it,” Henry added. “It is also dangerous for the horses, a risk I am not willing to take. That would leave us with no transportation or means of travel,” he finished. I nodded, though I still felt as if traveling through this realm was a bad idea at best.
“Plus, the journey allows me to collect items that are wonderful for medicinal purposes,” Ranbir said, sifting through his satchel. “Though I cannot say I am fond of the way horseback tosses around my vials.”
Winona giggled, her eyes never leaving her husband’s face.
I felt a pit grow in my stomach. I had never been on a horse before. A bead of sweat dripped down my back in spite of the cold as a faint neighing could be heard ahead.
When we were only a few steps away from the wooden structure, the ball of light moved, stopping just in front of Henry. The demon opened his hands, bringing them together over the iridescent sphere in a loud smack. At the impact, the light shattered, pieces floating to each of us. Bellamy urged me on, our respective beads following us to light our way.
I tried to swallow, but the lump in my throat refused to allow me that kindness. Sheer terror overcame me with the thought of being atop a creature so large. At that I recalled how Xavier had always told me that fear was inevitable, how pointless it was to run from it.
“Only fools deny and ignore something as inescapable as fear, Ash,” he would state. “What really matters is how you take that fear and overcome it.”
I would overcome this. If I could control the minds of all in attendance of my introductory ball while likely poisoned, I could ride a horse.
We rounded the corner then, and came upon the open entry of stables. Inside were at least a dozen horses, which was good because with each of us riding alone, we would need nearly all of them.
Bellamy’s grip on my hand tightened while he pulled me past each of the stalls, the horses huffing at us when we passed as if displeased by the idea of not being picked. I chuckled lightly, enjoying the amount of personality the beasts had. At least I would die laughing. We stopped at the very last stall, where the sight of the horse made me gasp.
“She is beautiful, right?” Bellamy whispered, a small smile forming on his face. I nodded, my mouth agape. The mare was silver from head to toe, matching perfectly to my cloak. Her eyes were the same startling color, glowing in the night with the help of our demon light. “I had Pino make a cloak to match, I thought you might enjoy a break from all of the gold.”
I tensed at the comment.
Gold. My least favorite color. Such a small gesture to anyone else, but to me, the idea of not wearing it was a dream. As soon as I got back to the Fae Realm, I would once again don the royal color. But, for now, Bellamy had ensured that I remained comfortable.
No, it was more than that. He had found a way to make me feel like someone. I was not a princess, The Manipulator, or a pawn. I was Asher, and that meant I could wear anything— be anything. Even if only for the length of this trip.
I tried to tell myself that he was tricking me. The horse, the perfectly decorated chambers, my clothing, all of it a bribe for my complacency and my forgiveness.
Yet, something inside of me hummed at his nearness, at his words. A part of me felt lighter, somehow. For the first time this week, I found myself smiling, truly smiling, and meaning it with my entire heart.
“Her name is Frost,” Bellamy said. That got my attention. In the Fae Realm, we considered frost to be the antithesis of ash. The opposite of me.
Bellamy’s gaze left my skin tingling. He was waiting. Hoping to gauge the way I reacted to the name choice, I imagined. Whether he was insinuating that I was darkness incarnate or perhaps making the analogy to convince me that he and I were the same, I was unsure. Either way, I had no interest in indulging him.
Instead, I slowly extended my arm, hand aiming for the head of the silver beast. She seemed docile, though I could sense a fire within her, those piercing eyes reading me.
Just like I read others.
I halted my movement just before I touched her, fingers and silver coat mere inches apart. I would let her meet me here—choose me rather than have me forced upon her.
Seconds ticked by, but I did not grow impatient. As always, I was aiming for acceptance, but this time it felt deeper. Frost was a different sort of hope. Jasper once told me that animals were astute judges of character. They could easily identify an enemy, but also a friend. Trust was something earned with animals.
The Single had said that while in his tigris form, he was able to s ee auras. Mine, apparently, was a pure white, like the midday sun on a bright summer day. If Frost rejected me now, I would have to smack Jasper for his lies.
Finally, Frost reached her muzzle towards my opened hand. She was soft, impossibly so. I pet her gently, a gruff exhale of breath, similar to a rough purr broke free of her mouth. I smiled, enjoying the way the horse nuzzled her nose further into my hand. In response, Frost came closer, licking my face.
Bellamy burst into laughter at my disgusted expression when I recoiled. The demon prince was bent over as the amusement shook his body, hands gripping his stomach while I wiped my cheek. Frost started lifting her front legs off the ground, huffing at the two of us.
“She either really likes you or the poor thing could use a little more salt in her diet,” Bellamy said once his chuckles died down.
“Why salt?” I asked, ignoring the amusement still lighting his eyes.
I once again began petting the mare, giving her a warning look that hopefully conveyed my distaste with her choice of affection. I could gladly scratch her all day, but the licking just would not do. Her long tongue was not a particularly welcome feeling.
“She could be licking you to taste the salt on your skin.” He shrugged. It was an interesting fact, and one I was surprised the prince would know. I was sure Henry would hold an extensive knowledge of the species since he mentioned they were an interest of his, but Bellamy had never mentioned them. Not that I had asked.
I knew so much about the Bellamy I met in The Capital, but I doubted anything he told me then had been true. Though his dishonesty and carefully constructed traits had been no fault of mine. While a part of me—the smarter portion—desired to maintain that distance we had forged, another wanted to know him.
And yet mere moments ago I had told myself that he did not deserve to know me.
Despite all that had transpired between us these last few weeks, did I deserve to know him? Was I any better than the demon at my side? A strange look passed over Bellamy, and I suddenly felt a sort of prodding at my power, like a tug. Then I realized it was Bellamy projecting his thoughts, practically screaming in his mind.
Pondering my next action for a moment, I decided it would not hurt to indulge my curiosity, especially when these beings repeatedly surprised me with their extensive knowledge of my powers. An understanding that went beyond even my own.
I would give anything to know what is going on in that beautiful head of yours.
Bellamy’s thoughts rang through my ears as if he had spoken them aloud. Just as Calista’s had. Just as Noe’s had. I stared at him, assessing the playfulness in his mental tone and comparing it to the desperation etched on his face. He meant those words. Possibly had contemplated them for a while. I weighed my own response.
Answer one of my questions, and I will tell you.
I could lay myself bare if it meant gaining information, I had offered the same to Noe. Not that thinking of my past hurts would help me at the moment. While he considered my offer, I thought up a question that would aid me during this journey. I had conjured a fairly decent question when he tugged once more. This time, I did not hesitate to grab onto his mind.
What would you like to know, Princess?
Rolling my eyes at the nickname, or insult, I hurled my question into the black void, watching his face as he listened.
Why do you bring fae here?
I regretted my choice immediately, wishing I had opted for a more direct phrasing—specific, impossible to work around. I needed answers, not hints and riddles. Despite how little I knew about Bellamy, one thing I could be sure of was that he would only offer the bare minimum of information. He was secretive, hesitant to trust. The thoughts and truths he guarded and hid would not be found easily.
“Let’s get you mounted, and when we are all moving, I will tell you,” he spoke, opening Frost’s stable door. The nerves came back in full force, making my breath hitch and my palms sweat. I could do this. I was smart, strong, powerful. I could ride a horse.
I watched as Bellamy hooked a black saddle onto Frost, the silver of her hair glittering in comparison to the dark leather. When he was finished with the complicated straps, tugging rather roughly to make sure it was secure, the demon prince waved his hand towards Frost. I slowly stepped towards the horse, patting her neck lightly to stall.
If he knew what I was doing, Bellamy did not let on. Instead, he nodded to me, moving across the stable walkway. His ball of light followed, highlighting a jet-black horse that was not only larger than Frost in height, but in sheer size. I wondered briefly how he would manage to get atop the horse, then decided that I should probably focus on how I was going to get onto Frost. I turned to face her once more, taking in a deep breath.
Then I did something I had never tried before—I reached out for Frost’s mind. Mia told me many years ago that it was likely I would be able to manipulate any mind, even a common mouse. But she also told me it would be a waste of my energy, which before seemed so finite. Not like the well of power that thrummed in my chest now. Somewhere deep in my subconscious a nagging, gnawing thought tried to free itself. I ignored it, focusing instead on the horse in front of me.
When Frost felt me invade her senses, she became frantic, jumping and kicking. For a split second I let the panic sink in, thought perhaps I had harmed her in some way. But instinct took over, and soon I was ordering her much as I would any being.
Stay calm.
The horse settled, my words soothing her immediately. A sense of guilt came then, but I pushed it back. I would get nowhere with such an annoyingly persistent conscience. Breathing in and out slowly, pacing my own racing heart, I once again spoke in the mind of the mare.
Stay still. You trust me, and I trust you. We are a team, Frost. We will do this, together.
The horse let out a small huff, as if in agreement. I nodded to her, offering a small smile before hooking my foot onto what I assumed was some sort of footrest. I had seen palace guards do this time and time again, even Xavier had mounted a horse in front of me once or twice.
I allowed myself a brief glance back at Bellamy. He was still arranging the saddle, his back to me. This would be my only chance to avoid embarrassment. As a final precaution, I reminded Frost to stay still.
I pushed up with my left foot, grabbing onto the saddle with both hands. Using every ounce of my strength to get myself onto the horse, I hoisted my body up. Too much strength, I realized a moment later. My chest passed over the saddle, my stomach following suit. Then my hips hit the leather with a loud smack, torso slamming into Frost’s side. She stood her ground, only letting out a short grunt of disapproval. I laid there, barely on the horse at all, while the blood rushed to my head.
How in the Underworld was I to get down? Or even right side up? I quickly became light-headed as I attempted to grab onto the rope hanging from the saddle. No amount of pulling was working, though.
Stuck. I was completely stuck. Like a bumbling fool.
Hands gripped my ankles, a chuckle sounding behind me. Oh please, no. I murmured a quick plea for him to just let me sit there and wilt, but it was no use. Bellamy was tugging my legs down, sliding my body slowly off of Frost.
His hands moved to my thighs, branding my skin through the thick trousers. Then he had me by the waist, his grip strong and unrelenting. One moment I was a dead fish on the horse, the next I was in his arms, a dimpled smile flashing down at me.
“I had a feeling you would not know how to ride, but I did not expect you to fail so miserably at mounting poor Frost,” Bellamy teased.
I scowled up at him, picturing my fist connecting to that face again. A chuckle to our right caught my attention, my head whipping towards the noise. Anger filled me to the brim—the most emotion I had felt since I was attacked—when my eyes met a pair of amused green irises.
Henry stood at the opening of the stall. The second our gazes connected he began laughing so violently that tears streamed down his face.
Without thinking I called to Frost’s mind.
Frost, I think Henry could use a bath.
I sent over an image to her, willing the horse to obey. Just like that, Frost leaned forward and rained spit down onto Henry’s face. I burst into a fit of laughter of my own, howling at Henry’s stunned expression.
“Good girl, Frost,” I said between chuckles. Bellamy’s own laugh rang through the wooden structure as he set me down. Henry attempted to wipe the spit onto his black and red leathers, but the fabric would not soak up the thick saliva.
I watched in glee as Henry stomped away to find something to clean himself off with. When he was out of sight, I stepped up to Frost and whispered into her ear, “That is my girl.” Scratching behind her ear, I peeked over at Bellamy to find him watching me with that smug smile still gracing his face.
“Impressive, the way you manipulated Frost’s mind. I knew that you two would get along,” he said, dipping his head towards the mare. I froze, the shock of him knowing quickly fading to annoyance. Of course, he knew. The damn demon knew everything.
I rolled my eyes, once again stepping onto the footrest of sorts, hoping this time I would be successful. Bellamy closed the space between us, offering me his hand. Oddly enough, I took his help, shocking even myself. Together, we successfully got me onto the horse.
I beamed down at him, proud that I had at least done some of the work. He smiled right back, the picture of joy. In his eyes there was something more, an emotion I could not, and would not, allow myself to understand.
“Now, I know that power of yours can make the process of riding easier, but you do not have to use it. Henry worked tirelessly with Frost to make sure she was perfectly trained, and she will listen to your vocal commands. She is incredibly intuitive and intelligent, just hold those reins and tell her what you need of her,” Bellamy explained, petting Frost as he did. He brought his nose close to hers, looking into her big, silver eyes. “Keep her safe Frost, she is important to me.”
Below me, Frost stomped, moving her head up and down as she huffed at him. Those actions satisfied Bellamy enough to warrant a smile, and then he was off, heading towards the black horse across the way. Ignoring his comment to Frost, I watched as he effortlessly mounted the large beast, winking at me once he was up. I rolled my eyes again, then closed them.
I could do this.
Henry appeared once more, face clean and mood deliciously foul. I was pleased that I had successfully annoyed him at least. He walked up to Frost, grabbing onto the straps on her head, and led us out of the wooden stables. When we were back in the open air, I let out a sigh of relief, this was not so horrible.
Yet.
Bellamy and his horse came trotting from behind, stopping beside me. His horse was bigger than I first estimated, towering over Frost by well over a foot. The prince saw me assessing his stallion and tilted his head to the side.
“Lucifer might be bigger and stronger than Frost, but she is far more cunning and fast. You are safe and in wonderful hands. Or, well, hooves.” He shrugged. I merely nodded, biting back my laugh, not wanting to feed his already inflated ego. As the others began emerging, tugging the straps of their own horses, I swallowed the rising fear.