Chapter Forty-Six
G athered around the fire, seven of us remained silently sitting while Bellamy paced and murmured to himself. I had wanted to say something encouraging, to lead the way I had always been taught, but nothing came to mind.
Pino had not specified who or what was coming, but the urgency in his written words were clear: they needed to prepare, now.
Suddenly, a question came to me.
“Wait. How is it that Pino knows something, or someone, is coming?” My words sounded strange as they tore through the hollowness that had come from our lack of talking.
The group stirred, looking my way. Then, as if needing permission, each of their gazes found the, now still, prince, who merely eyed me. When no one responded, I continued voicing my thoughts and confusion aloud.
“I just mean that I have never come across a Tomorrow with the ability of foresight to that extent. Well, apart from my friend Nicola, who sometimes has dreams that manifest. That, though, was previously unheard of. I guess I am wondering what makes Pino believe that there is danger lurking? Did he touch someone and see their death?” I asked, ceasing my nervous rambling.
The others allowed their eyes to roam to Bellamy once more, not daring to speak an answer. Another secret, another lie. Was Eoforhild really in danger, or was something more convoluted occurring? I meant to ask when Bellamy finally found his voice.
“Every couple of millennia, a Reader is born with a power greater than their peers. What they see is not limited to yesterday or tomorrow and no touch is required, they simply see what the gods deem worthy. The past many have forgotten, the future many have feared, and the present many have avoided. A fae such as this is not called a Tomorrow or a Yesterday, for they are far beyond. They are called Oracles, ” Bellamy said, the word sounding foreign and strange.
Yet another term I was not privy to. Annoyance was beginning to form at the realization that I was far more ignorant to my own subjects than I thought. There was so much more to them than I ever knew, to the extent that I was starting to wonder if I would have been the queen I had always imagined myself as.
Ranbir spoke next, a voice of reason among the panic.
“What is our next move then? We cannot simply leave Haven without forces seeing as it is a border land, but someone must rally our armies. And we need Asher to meet King Adbeel so that —” Ranbir cut himself off midsentence, grimacing as he looked my way in apology.
I rolled my eyes, crossed my arms, and promptly pouted like the grown fae I was.
Noe and Henry both let out low chuckles, but quickly reverted back to seriousness as Bellamy once again paced. His face was scrunched together in concentration.
From a political standpoint, the best thing they could do would be to immediately meet with their king and allow for the monarch to weigh in, if not make the final decision. But I could see how their priorities might be the defense of a village they all deeply loved.
Without thinking it through, I allowed myself to weigh in.
“We should split up. If you think about it, this group is probably perfect for the divide we need. Bellamy can take Lian and Henry to your armies and ready them. While they are doing that, Noe, Ranbir, and Winona can all head back to Haven to prepare defenses. Little shadow should be more than enough to get me safely to the clutches of your demon king. I myself am eager to find out what ploy is in place that requires my abduction, so truthfully this scenario works perfectly,” I said, sarcasm heavy on my tongue. I was still a bit bitter, obviously.
Yet, the wisdom and reasoning to my plan was solid. Noe nodded, Henry agreeing silently. Cyprus looked positively giddy, smiling from ear to ear at the prospect. The others also seemed to agree that this plan, which I so nicely provided, was probably the best course of action.
Bellamy’s was the only face that grew angrier. The demon’s cheeks went red as he stared my way. I waved a hand at his disapproval, standing up to square off with him. He did not back down, coming over to tower above me instead.
“Now is not the time for territorial jealousy, you prick. Not to mention that you have no right to dictate or disagree with who I allow around me. We need to split up whether you like it or not!” I hissed.
He merely stared at me, contemplating.
How was it that I—someone with no reason to help these creatures, who had thought them to be monsters only two months prior—was the one fighting to protect their realm?
“Fine. We split up then,” Bellamy said. I nodded, thankful he was finally agreeing with me. About time. “With one small change. I will be accompanying you to Dunamis instead.”
I groaned, rubbing my temples to give relief from the headache forming there. Jealous idiot. No one objected to the plan, but anyone could see that the best option would be for their general to lead the army. If it were foreign forces coming, then they would have to make it past The Mist to reach the realm, which in itself was horrifying as the capability to pass through it was beyond any knowledge. No one with enough power to do that should be overlooked, especially not for me.
“Once you are safely settled, I will head to the base,” he added on, nodding to himself.
“I really think—”
“Enough Asher. We all depart in the morning,” Bellamy said, promptly cutting me off. The demon sat, not willing to speak further. I gasped at his sheer audacity, poised to do something reckless. Henry reached his hand up to grab my elbow, shaking his head as he pulled me to him.
I huffed, but conceded. The fight would be pointless when they would all listen to Bellamy regardless of my protests. Still, I felt angered by his refusal to see reason.
“Where do you need me, Bell?” Cyprus asked, not sounding the least bit perturbed by having his spot taken from him. I admired that about the whisp, his ability to adapt and smile through challenges. He was incredibly optimistic and energetic, never faltering in his mood.
“Betovere. Something about this feels wrong. Bigger than us having Asher. We make no real moves until I get to the king. He will want to know what is happening,” Bellamy said, his voice grim but strong. He was rising, as those in power must do during times of fear and danger.
Bigger than me? Did Bellamy think the fae were fighting back against the demons’ attacks on Betovere? I grew angry at the idea, the simmering heat of fury boiling over and spilling out of me.
“Perhaps if you would simply stop attacking the fae, then your subjects—your entire realm—would not be in danger,” I seethed. This argument had been a long time coming. I knew it. He knew it. We all did. For every move I took towards them, I also took two back. My own ears were a product of their violence as a species. Any war that came would be born of a natural feud, but would be urged on by their bloody choices.
Ranbir gasped, his eyes wide. Winona grabbed his hand, squeezing it in comfort. Lian glared at me, as if I were wrong for standing up for our kind. Noe, Henry, and Cyprus remained silent, though I could see the judgement in their eyes.
Did they all truly justify their actions? How could they possibly sit there and know that innocent fae were being murdered at the hands of demons, and still support that? It was disgusting.
Bellamy stood once more, my words stoking the fire within him, feeding that anger that was such a fundamental part of the Fire sub faction, his preferred power.
“You know nothing, Asher. Nothing. We have not laid a single attack on Betovere since the Great Wars, even when warranted. That king and queen that you so deeply love are framing us for murders they have committed. They want you to think us the enemy, they want divide, because they want war. They want power!” he shouted, causing me to shrink back into Henry.
The tattoos on Bellamy’s exposed forearms writhed, as if they were alive. Pulsing and stirring, they slithered like snakes, roaming his cream skin. The angrier he grew, the faster they moved.
“Why do you think that we have fae here in Eoforhild? Have you considered that there must be a reason for fae to escape your realm? Well there is. Eighty years ago, I was in Betovere and came across Lian screaming over a bloodied body while three guards in gold aimed at her with fucking swords.” Lian cringed, eyes clamping shut against the onslaught of emotions that the story brought out of her, tears streaming down her face.
“She begged— begged , Asher—for them to stop. She had done nothing wrong, her lover had done nothing wrong. When they attempted to drag Lian from her bloody body, I killed them. All of them. From then on, I found a way to rescue those who had been so brutally treated. I found fae who were about to be executed for daring to love one outside of their faction. Fae who were two millennia and considered expendable. Younglings who showed little to no power. So many that your filthy royals have deemed unworthy of life.”
The silence among us was painful as Bellamy neared me. His breathing grew heavier, eyes blazing with a rage that seeped from him, assaulting my senses. Fists clenched and jaw tight, Bellamy stopped his approach, as if he were too angry to keep walking.
Hot tears met my cheeks, but I did not allow myself to look away from the rage on his face. The pain.
“Do you think I do not want to wage war on them? Of course I do. Henry has been pushing me to do so for decades. How do you think I felt when I found out that they beat you to near death? What do you think I wanted to do when I heard how they treated you like a puppet? The moment I was made aware that they allowed that foul little mortal boy to touch you and live, I nearly stormed the castle. I would have done it, Asher. I would kill them all to save you, make no mistake. For you, I would be the villain.”
His words were like a slap across the face. It felt as if my heart were shattering to pieces, hearing him speak and seeing the look on the two fae faces in front of me was gut-wrenching.
“But I will tell you right now, I have not attacked Betovere, and neither have my kind or any of my subjects. That is because I do not want death and carnage and the loss of innocents. So please, tell me again how I can stop this war that the royal fae are so set on beginning.”
Seven pairs of eyes looked upon me. In the distance, a bird screeched. Otherwise, the silent air was thick with unspoken words and the truth that parted ways from Bellamy’s lips. My hands grazed my ears, the tears still racing down my face. Had Xavier cut them? Mia? Were they the ones who murdered my parents? Had they been the ones to rip their own son’s life from this world?
They lied to me, all of them. The royals, Bellamy, his Trusted. It was not my fault I lived in ignorance of the truth. Yet, I felt guilty. So immensely guilty that I had thought the beings around me had been mass murdering fae. Because they had proven themselves just and kind. Taking me was horrible, yes, but had Bellamy not saved me from Sterling? Had his Trusted not treated me as a comrade and cared for me like their own?
I considered how quickly Bellamy and Henry had come to my defense when those two demons attacked me. I remembered the circle the seven of them had formed around me when the afriktor threatened us. I thought of waking up in the grass to find Lian watching over me. I recalled how Noe held me when I cried. How they trained me and laughed with me and…loved me.
This group of beings, so different from one another, loved without hatred or judgement. They cared so deeply that they would lay down their lives for each other. For me.
And I accused them of attacking me and slaughtering my fae.
“I am—I just—” Words were failing me. No apology could make up for the lies that I had let sway my attitude and thoughts all this time.
At my back I felt a warm pressure. Henry had placed a hand there, comforting me as my mind reeled with the life-changing information. I offered the best smile I could muster in return, hoping that I did not look as pathetic as I felt.
Eighty years, that was how long I had been sitting idly by as fae were murdered by the couple I had considered my family. Nearly a century of strengthening our defenses, building prejudices, and honing powers for a war that could be avoided.
A war that would leave land decimated and lead to the death of thousands.
“I am sorry, Asher. I know you have been through a lot, and I would take away that pain in an instant if I could, but we are running out of time,” Bellamy rasped, his voice a plea of sorts. The prince walked over to me, kneeling down at my feet and grabbing my hands in his own. “You have to pick a side, Princess. You have to make the choice that you have been avoiding. Because there is no room to sit in the middle when a war begins.”
Bellamy reached up to cup my face with one of his hands, palm blazing on my ice-cold skin. He was asking for too much. How could I choose between the male in front of me and my friends back in Betovere? If I promised to aid the demons, would that threaten the innocent lives of those back home?
My breathing picked up, the tempo of my heart increasing to a dangerous speed. I needed more time. I needed Nicola’s wisdom. I needed to find a better way.
I needed someone to bear the weight of the world that was upon my shoulders.
At my feet, Bellamy continued to stare into my eyes—my soul—searching for the answer he wanted. For the first time, I acknowledged that I did want to choose him. In a better world, we would be together. It would be as easy as breathing, loving him. Laughter and joy would fill our lives, perhaps even younglings one day. We could spend evenings with his Trusted and my own friends. A family of sorts.
That world was far different than this one, in which I was forced to witness my life crumble. Piece by piece it all crashed down around me.
Who was I? Certainly not a princess when I had been content to laugh and smile and breathe while my subjects were ruthlessly murdered by their king and queen.
I felt the moment when my mental shields fell. A cataclysmic shattering of that last mercy. When they toppled, every emotion and thought of the others bombarded me.
Suddenly I was feeling the rip in Lian’s heart at the thought of her Yuza dying on the ground. Ranbir’s thoughts of his own family being beheaded in front of him were horrific. Noe’s anger towards Bellamy as she stood to her feet hit me violently. Cyprus was a whirl of stress for us, for Haven, for Luca, for his parents and sister. Winona was calculating, thinking of what war would mean for the inhabitants of Eoforhild, for her abnormally large family of parents and siblings that had no idea what was to come.
But it was Henry, who still rubbed circles on my back, that pushed me over the edge. He thought of watching me practice, the speed at which I learned. The demon conjured images of me on a battlefield, cutting down fae with eerie precision. He imagined what it would be like to watch bodies fall as I shattered minds. In his head, I was the monster that woke fae younglings from their sleep, terror ripping screams from their mouths.
The one thing their thoughts had in common was their belief that I could be a solution. To all of them I was a creature of the Underworld. Everything I had never wanted to be. Everything they needed to win the war.
I screamed, clawing at my head as if I could dig out their mental voices. My own voice, that deep tenor of The Manipulator, urged me to end them all. To shut them up swiftly. I fought against it, heaving and screeching for anyone to please help me.
Hitting the ground with a smack to the snow, I writhed, body convulsing as my power attempted to dig into the minds of those around me. I sunk into each of their heads, fighting my own urge to attack as I did.
Bellamy seized me, pulling my body into his arms. No pain from portaling could break through the torment occurring in my mind as time and space tried to rip us to shreds for daring to defy them, for my soul had long since been torn apart.