49
Huxley
This. Fucking. Woman.
How have I gone so long without her in my arms?
She feels like a drug. Like a sinful indulgence that could shatter my world in an instant if I let her.
And fuck do I want to let her.
I press her body against my apartment door and kiss her with every ounce of power I have left in me.
She tries to stay upright, but she slips down the door an inch as her knees buckle under her.
I help her out, sliding my hands down the outside of her hips before I grip her behind the thighs, lifting her into my arms.
The change of position doesn’t stop her.
Her legs wrap around me like she’s done this a million times before, her hands threading into my hair so our connection doesn’t break.
A small whimper leaves her throat when I do pull back, but my lips immediately find her neck, so she doesn’t suffer for long.
She grips my hair tighter when I find a spot on her skin to suck. A breathy moan leaves her as her hips roll involuntarily into mine. I groan into her skin and pull her from the door, leaving my lips on her neck as I try to get us to my bedroom in one piece.
Thankfully, Val reaches for the walls, feeling to make sure we’re going in the right direction. All while she’s softly whining from my kiss.
I drop her on the bed and hover over her. Her eyes shine up at me, glassy and in need of more.
“You weren’t yourself that day.” My voice is deeper, rougher. And it’s all because of that look in her eyes.
“What?” she barely breathes out, her chest still heaving. I reach down and grab her hands to pull them up by her head. Somehow, that makes her chest push forward, like she’s begging me to touch her. And god do I want to do more than that right now.
“The day we planned to have sex,” I remind her. “Your outfit, your makeup, your hair, hell, even your shoes weren’t you.”
My lips find her neck again, and she leans back to give me more room.
I knew she liked her neck kissed. Even that first night, when it was pretty much all I did to her, she still enjoyed every second of it.
I find the sweet spot, right at the base of her neck, and she presses her chest further into me.
“But this is you,” I whisper into her skin. “This is Valentina. My Valentine.”
I can’t help it. I bite down on her neck, and an intoxicating moan leaves her lips. “God, you sound fucking amazing.”
She squirms a little beneath me, pulling her sweater off her shoulder. I glance up at her and place a soft kiss there. Her head is still tilted back, but her fingers try to reach for mine.
I don’t even hesitate to push my hands into hers, intertwining our fingers, needing her touch just as much as she needs mine, as I drag my lips over her collarbone.
She grips my hands tighter as I continue my actions on the other side. My knee pushes between her legs, opening her up further. She grips my hands harder, but this time it doesn’t feel the same.
“No,” she barely whispers, but I stop immediately. I lift myself to look down at her, and even though her eyes are dilated, and her chest is still begging to be touched, I can see the fear that starts to peak through. “I’m not ready for that.”
I detangle my hands from hers in case she wants to move away from me, too, but she doesn’t. She stays right here with me. “That’s okay,” I whisper back. “Just tell me where I can go.”
She pulls her eyes from mine to look at her disheveled sweater that I’ve pulled back and forth to get more of her skin.
Our eyes reconnect as she reaches up, pulling it down further.
She gets it down far enough that the top part of her bra peaks out, giving me so much more of her chest than I’ve ever seen before.
“Whatever is exposed.” My eyes snap back to hers at the confidence in her voice. “That’s where you can go.”
I want to look at her longer. The power behind her eyes in this moment is extremely attractive.
But I’m a man. And she just gave me more of her chest that I’ve been dying to have in my mouth for years now.
So I look down, tracing the outline of her bra with my eyes, and telling myself I have to calm down because this is as much as I get right now.
“I can do that.” My voice deepens, and Val bites her lip after I speak. If she’s getting turned on by my voice, I could have so much fun with her. I push that aside for now and dive back in.
My lips trace over her neck for only a moment before I move to her chest. I make sure to cover every inch of her skin with a simple kiss before I go back and find where I can have the most fun.
My eyes go to hers as my tongue traces her skin just above her bra. She grips the bedding at a tender spot, so I stop and start sucking there. Her head falls back again in a deeper moan as she writhes under my touch.
“You shouldn’t be allowed to feel this good. To sound this good.” I suck a little harder on her skin, and she whimpers. “Taste this good.”
I push myself up, and she follows me, breathing heavily and barely able to control her little whimpers of need.
“I want to do this every day for the rest of my life. Feel you, hear you, taste you. I want all of you constantly. I want to breathe you, see you, be utterly consumed by you, Valentina Demarco. I don’t care who else comes into your life. I’m your first, so you will always belong to me.”
I barely get all my words out before she pulls me down to her, our mouths matching each other's rhythm as she begs for access with her tongue. Nothing will ever take this feeling away. This connection that I have with this girl. She’s mine.
No matter what life throws our way, she’s my girl till the end of time.
She barely pushes me back, our eyes connecting, and my world starts to tip.
This girl shouldn’t be here with me. I shouldn’t be her first.
A soft, blinding smile spreads on Val’s face. “I’m yours.”
I reconnect our lips with a desperate urgency that only she makes me feel.
Because even though none of this should be happening to me, I’m going to hold on as strong as I can.
I’m in love with Valentina Demarco. And her telling me she’s mine is just as good as her saying she loves me, too.
Even if she does leave me when graduation comes, I will always have this moment.
This moment where love felt possible.
This moment where I can pretend I’m worthy of her, even though I never will be.