13. Chapter 13
13
“No dinner again tonight,” Oliver said, low enough that the lying omega wouldn’t hear if she was listening in. Ruck searched my face like he expected me to say something. I sawed my beef, popped it defiantly in my mouth. He tossed his napkin to the side with a sigh. Why was it so hard to understand that I didn’t want to talk about Esta?
She lied. That was enough to kill any love I had for her forever.
Bram cast a pale-faced, pinched look toward the kitchen. Impossibly, my coldness toward her made him long for her. He wasn’t the only one. Ruck and Oliver moped in silence, and their frustration grew to a boiling point. It was making work on the ranch impossible.
“The poor girl is fading away, Hale. She must have a reason for hiding her designation. Do you even know what it is?” Ruck slammed his cutlery down. It was unlike my brother. His even temper was one of his finest qualities, as was his ability to turn everything into a joke. But Ruck had an interest in Esta, and he wouldn’t let me forget it. It verged on unnatural, and both he and Oliver wouldn’t let my treatment of her lie.
Just more proof of her omega manipulations.
I slammed my fist on the table, and the cutlery rattled.
“Enough. I won’t discuss this with you again.”
Esta was a lying omega, the very thing I could not abide. I wish I could convince my body. Her peaches and cream scent bathed the house. Every flare of my nostrils filled with a gulp of her tantalizing scent. The undercurrent of stress tainted it. Like fruit plucked from the tree too soon.
It sickened and aroused me in turn. My instincts crawled with the desire to bundle her in my lap and soothe whatever unsettled her. My throat was red and raw from swallowing constant bile.
I was the source of her distress. It satisfied me that she was unhappy. She deserved it for her trickery. After deliberately letting me believe she was a beta with her blasted tea. Being around Esta filled me with constant tension.
I needed her gone from this house before I snapped.
Just this week, she’d washed my sheets, and now the stiff cotton smelled like her. It was enough that I’d lain the whole night with my cock rock hard and ended up releasing my tension twice before the morning light finally filtered in. I’d taken to sleeping in the barn just to escape the drowsing intoxication that occurred with the first whiff.
“Esta said she was unsafe, but I don’t trust a word that comes out of her mouth. She has two more weeks to receive a letter, but either way, she’ll be gone from this house soon.”
I didn’t even want to say her name. Ruck hissed and shook his head. Oliver fixed me with a look dark enough to blot out the sun.
“She’s not Claudia, brother, and if you continue with this unnecessary brutish behavior, you’re going to regret it.”
“She’s my wife. I’ll deal with her as I see fit.”
I pinned him with a stern glare. Ruck thrust his chin up, determined.
Bram’s words broke our stare. “Is it because of the scars?” he asked, sopping up some gravy with his bread.
“What scars?” I snapped, wondering what the hell the boy was talking about. Esta didn’t have any scars. A chill raked through me, except that I hadn’t seen her in any state of undress. “Where?”
Bram looked up with surprise, and his cheeks blew out before he answered.
“On her shoulder, it looks like someone tore into her.”
My tongue caught between my teeth as they slammed together. My skull reverberated with the jarring force of it.
Someone else marked Esta? It wasn’t possible. If another alpha claimed her as his own, his scent would anchor beneath hers. My canines ached with futile longing.
She was my wife.
It should be my mark upon her skin. My stomach rolled at the thought of being linked to her. Chained to her.
“How do you know this?” I managed not to sound as unhinged as I felt inside. My stomach cramped with sharp acid. Bram shrugged, his expression guarded. I’d been so short-tempered since I discovered what happened with Esta. I didn’t blame him for being wary.
“Tell us, Bram. Did they look recent?” Ruck waved his hand. Oliver was half out of his chair, hovering. What did he expect to hear? Why did it look like this news affected them as much as it did me?
“I accidentally walked in on her bathing yesterday. She filled the standing tub in the pantry.” His eyes blew wide as all three of us let out growls. His hands flew up. “I didn’t see nothin’ except the marks on her shoulder. They’re old but ugly.”
I shot up from the table, moving toward the kitchen before I even realized what I was doing. Ruck and Oliver berated Bram for intruding on Esta’s privacy. Esta was perched on a stool. Her fingers worked deftly to pull a thread through one of my shirts. My chest ached. I’d torn it yesterday, and she was already mending it. She was trying to ingratiate herself, that was all . Sharp whispers warned me. Esta’s eyes widened as I stormed closer, but her hands clenched in her lap.
“Undress.” I barked at her, unable to gentle my request.
Her shoulders bunched around her ears, but she took a deep breath and forced them down.
“Excuse me?” she drew the words out with such disgust, enough that an uncomfortable pressure weighed down my stomach.
She set aside my shirt, careful not to prick her finger this time. I hadn’t looked at her directly since I found out the truth, but I did now. Dark smudges painted her under eyes. She was as tormented as I was. She folded in on herself like she could escape my notice if she tried. Did she not know how magnetic she was? Even weighed down with misery, something in me yearned for her.
That’s why she was so dangerous.
I’d bound myself to her by human custom, knowing I could never claim her as an alpha would. But now, the pale line of her unmarked throat sang to me. My teeth ached in their gums, needing the anchor of her soft flesh. The tang of her warm blood on my tongue.
Had someone marked her, unwanted? An alpha could mark an omega by force, but a bond given in violence would wither.
“Bram said you have marks on your shoulder, and I want to see them.”
Her eyes were flat and dull as she regarded my request, but a faint flush crept up from her chest. I didn’t care about her embarrassment. I was her husband. She shook her head, frowning slightly over my shoulder. Bram gave a sheepish sigh.
“Go wash up for bed.” She ordered him, and he beamed, bouncing out of the room as if she’d promised him a castle. He was grateful for even the smallest bit of attention from the omega now. The abrupt change in the small boy concerned me. He wasn’t privy to the decision I made about Esta, although it was impossible not to feel the tension. Bram was only just clawing back an indefinable peace, one missing since our mama died.
Would he revert to the wild and difficult child he’d been when Esta left? He’d thank me one day for saving him from her endless magnetism.
Ruck and Oliver stole the space he left, peering in with tight jaws. Ruck was struggling not to add his piece. They were both coiled tight like whips, and I felt the brush of their judgment like a thousand lashes.
“What are you waiting for?” I waved an impatient hand. The silent way she held herself irked me, her grace in the face of my churlish request. My insides twisted, a permanent state since I’d turned her away. Esta hadn’t fallen to pieces like I’d expected. Her wails of despair didn’t rattle the walls, and I’d braced for them. She’d cried, yes, but under the cover of darkness. Then she wiped her stricken cheeks, took a deep breath, and endured. She made meals, washed clothes, and kept the house burgeoning with her warmth. I felt like an interloper in my own kitchen, as if this space capitulated to her alluring presence as well.
Rage ate away at my insides, leaving a hollow.
“I’m not going to disrobe for a crowd. Despite what you think about me, I do have morals.” Her sharp words pricked like a needle. The sting stabbed past my defenses enough to make me flinch.
I tossed a glare over my shoulder. If I couldn’t take my anger out on the unmovable omega, I would blast it toward someone else. But it seemed everyone was intent on being defiant today. Oliver’s fingers tightened white around the door frame, and his heavy brows dropped low in a challenge. He shook his head. I would have to pry him away from Esta. Fire flared up my spine, indignation licked at the nerve endings. Omegas could wrap anyone around their little pinky finger. All they needed to do was bat their pretty lashes and pout. That was what I’d always believed, and here it was, in action.
“You’ll do as your husband commands. We are still married, according to the law.”
Esta’s hand flew to her throat, circling the pale skin unconsciously. I swallowed a groan. I could sink my teeth into the pale length and make a hook in her soul. An impossibility I’d dreamed of when I thought she was a beta. Her eyes flickered to me, unsure. But her lashes settled, and her chin inched up in infinitesimal increments. She drew steely armor around herself like a shawl.
If I didn’t hate her so much, I might respect her inner strength.
“I’ll obey, husband, but only if you listen to me first.”
I rocked back on my heels, stomach lurching with the need to refute her claim. Hearing the word husband on her honeyed tongue made me want to vomit. Hatred soaked through my blood, aged with years of bitterness and resentment. It threaded through my muscles and into my bones. Long before I’d ever met Esta.
Omegas caused every misery in my life.
Esta was a beautiful nightmare. My body couldn’t sense her evil, but I knew. Her kind brought men to their knees. But it was harder to hate someone when you saw the wobble of their chin. When you knew their laugh and dreamed of it every night. Esta waited as my ribs cracked with torn emotions, her delicate chin lifted in defiance.
I flicked my wrist at her in wordless acceptance.
Her strong shoulders slumped forward minutely, but her eyes blazed with renewed determination.
“Smythe is my mother's maiden name, my real one is Esta Miller. My father, Neil Miller, helped fund the railway some thirty years ago. He’s one of the wealthiest Designated in Breton City. Designated are treated with much more disdain in the city. So, my father is an outlier. He might be rich, but society refused to accept him because he’s an alpha. But one day, he became acquaintances with a man named Daniel Baron. He didn’t seem to care about my father being Designated. Daniel was from a prestigious family but made some terrible money decisions. My father’s acumen helped him stabilize his dwindling fortune, and Daniel introduced him to the upper echelons of society. Now all the humans wanted to make deals with the alpha, who could turn anything to gold.”
“What does this have to do with anything?” I interrupted with a dismissive tone. Her scent cloyed at me with irresistible tendrils, and I needed to get out of the small, confined space before it muddled my mind further. Esta’s hands were still clenched in her lap.
“I told you.” She tossed cryptically over my shoulder, and Ruck made a noise of frustration.
“Keep going,” he urged her.
“Despite his hiccup with his fortune, Daniel is a powerful man in Breton City. Inexplicably, he decided he wanted a pretty omega. He wanted exactly what you despise, Mr. Hartlock, the sweet, biddable omega. He didn’t care about my opinion on the matter, and neither did my father. It was perfect for his plans, and he didn’t care if I agreed or not.”
“This man wanted to you as his wife?” Acid coated the back of my tongue at the thought of Esta marrying someone else. Designated and human pairings were more common in the wildlands, where judgment gave way to survival.
Esta’s nose scrunched up, and she made a derisive noise.
“It is considered eccentric. But Daniel never intended to let me leave the house. He wanted a trophy, a glorified pet.”
A pet he wanted to bed, I thought to myself.
Nausea cramped my stomach. Esta’s father must have known the torture he was signing his daughter up for. A human could never meet her needs. Humans treated Designated like we were lesser beings, but they also didn’t understand how we were different. The moment Esta went into heat, that city-born fool would have realized how different omegas were.
“He might have made a kind husband,” I argued. There were plenty of men who married without love. I was one of them. Falling for Esta hadn’t been my plan. I’d married her for what she could do for me. It was the way of the world. But my words sparked a fire in Esta as she hopped off her stool and wrenched the ties at her back. I turned, intending to shoo Ruck and Oliver away, but they growled at me.
“This is what he considered kindness.” Esta swallowed a sob, yanking down her stays and pulling her chemise to the side. She presented her back, fingers clutching at the ruined skin of her shoulder. “Daniel is a monster who wanted to eat me whole.”
Her dress gaped open, and the milky silk of her skin, the dusting of amber freckles, mesmerized me. Her fingers quivered in barely contained rage at her shoulder.
When an alpha bonded with an omega, it was a sacred joining.
Soul bonds were beautiful things.
A moment of pain before the two souls unfurled and tangled together. The skin healed with ease, leaving a silver, almost opalescent sheen on the skin. Esta’s shoulder had none of that. The scars were deep, red, and vicious. My pulse roared in my ears, a storm of emotions crashing into me. Ruck and Oliver stifled noises of dismay behind me.
“Daniel courted me with all the patience of a steam train. He was unused to reticence. My father let him in the room alone with me, the man who was supposed to protect my innocence. Daniel heard about mating marks, and he decided he would claim me by way of a Designated. Human teeth remain blunt. Did you know that? He pinned me down and tore me to pieces. It didn’t matter that I screamed so loud my ears rang. Or that I was dizzy and half unconscious by the time he finished.”
Esta covered the gnarled, red scars with shaking fingers. But it didn’t stem the curtain of rage that crept over my vision.
"A human did this?" Oliver growled in a shaking, angry tone. The rage that demanded payment.
“Is he dead?” The words were hot coals on my tongue. Burning me like a brand. The only cure? Vengeance. This man who dared touch Esta and hurt her delicate body. If he wasn’t dead already, he would be soon.
She turned around, clutching her half-undone clothes against her. Esta’s eyes glimmered with unshed tears, and the well of sadness made me want to roar at the ceiling.
“The morning after he…did that to me…I saw your ad in the paper. I wanted freedom for once in my life, and I thought I could get it here. I could explain I wasn’t a beta like you asked for. But I was a hard worker, I was determined, and I would do anything, anything —” she broke off, her resolve faltering as memories overcame her. My chest ached to crush her into its wide, safe expanse. The idea of her underneath the boot of a human, as he tore mercilessly into her skin, made me want to rage. I took a step back, the desire so fierce it barreled through me. Esta’s bottom lip wobbled.
She twisted me to her control so easily.
“I’m sorry for lying. I was desperate to escape a human who would have destroyed me, and you were my only option. Can you forgive me? See that I didn’t do this as some scheme to hurt you? Hale, what we built here was the first genuine joy I’ve ever felt. Freedom and love. Family and nature. You mean so much to me, I…”
She stripped herself in front of me, literally and figuratively. Now she waited, disheveled and humbled. I vibrated with the need to sweep her into my arms. To care for her the way she craved right now. Gods, she was strong, trembling with aftershocks of her admission. But I couldn’t tell if it was my heart or my biology. My stomach tossed with nausea.
“It’s Mr. Hartlock.” I reacted to the burnt syrup that seared my nostrils and pulsed at me to act. I couldn’t. I learned long ago that omegas were master manipulators. This is what they did.
“What is wrong with you, Hale?” Ruck couldn’t take it anymore, shouldering past me and wrapping his arms around Esta. She melted into his embrace, face pinched with distress. They looked good together, her soft form pressed against his hardened one. It wasn’t proper, the way he was holding her. But I couldn’t offer comfort. My distrust was too deep-rooted.
I took the coward’s exit and fled.
My head spun as a blast of fresh air filled my lungs. It tore away Esta’s scent, and I fought against the urge to go back. To steal her delicious warmth and kiss the tears off her cheeks. I leaned over with my hands pressed against my knees. Fighting the desire to hurl.
“Do you hate me?” Oliver stepped into my vision, stiff with disapproval.
I tossed my head in confusion. “Of course not.”
I needed to get away from here. Anywhere. Somewhere, I could howl my confusion at the cloudy sky. I would saddle a horse and ride out to the edge of the property, as far as I could get from Esta and her confession. The scars on her shoulder haunted me. I could almost taste the iron in the back of my throat. Blood would have painted her by the time Daniel was done with her.
“But you hate my mother, so you must hate me, too.”
Oliver possessed his mother’s coloring, the fiery locks that used to bring Designated from miles around to Misery Creek.
To visit the omega at Madam Silver's.
So, my father told me. There was no mistaking the Hartlock nose, too large on Oliver's face. It made him look like a bird of prey. His green eyes blazed with disbelief and trembling rage.
“You’re my family. I can’t hate you.” I consoled my half-brother.
Esta thought I hated omegas because of Claudia, but that wasn’t true. My hatred started a long time ago when I found out a pint-sized omega lured my very own father into bed. She’d worked in Madam Silver's with its original owner. Not Lacey, who ran it now, fashioning herself as a new Madam Silver. Oliver grew up there, in the musty rooms that reeked of sex and mingled scents. Underfoot of restless Designated who came to drown their worries in warm pussy. For a price. My father was happily married. He didn’t need an omega, but somehow, he impregnated Oliver’s mother. Clients paid extra to see her through her heat, with precautions needed to ensure no child was born.
But she’d used her omega wiles against him, made herself irresistible, and he was defenseless against her superior will. While I never begrudged my younger half-brother, his mother tore my parents' marriage apart.
“I don’t know what our father told you, but my ma told me stories, too. Of how lonely your father was, how he smiled and laughed and said he would return. He’s not the saint you think he is, and you’re going to throw away ---”
I had Oliver on the ground in an instant, diverting my fist at the last second into the cold, hard ground. Pain reverberated up my arm, wrapping around the tense muscles.
“Don’t.” I panted above my brother, fighting the urge to slam my curled fist into his defiant face. Was everyone set to challenge me today? First, Esta, with her lies and her scars that made my body run hot and cold. Now Oliver, bringing up something I told him I never wanted to speak about, ever.
“Look past your hatred. Look at the woman you are lucky to call your wife. She doesn’t deserve this.”
I gripped Oliver’s shoulders and slammed him into the ground, getting grim satisfaction from his grunt of pain. The knots in my stomach twisted hard until I gasped at a shot of pain.
“Stay out of it. And don’t speak to me of…just don’t speak to me about it. Nothing you say will change my mind.”
“I wish you’d never met her. I would’ve loved her with every damn piece of me.” Oliver spat at me, and I staggered to my feet.
“Don’t you think I know that?”
I strode toward the barn, leaving Oliver in the dirt. But he couldn’t heed my words, or he wouldn’t, because his low voice chased me into the barn.
“You’re a damned fool, Hale Hartlock.”